“You haven’t mentioned your friends.”
We stopped at a red light while he stared through the windshield. I could see him contemplating what he wanted to share. “Not a lot to tell. There’s a group of us—you’ll meet them all tonight. Drake, Holland, Max, and Willum. Great guys. For the most part, we all grew up together but led similarly sheltered lives until post college. We’re all single and all well-to-do now. None of us trusts the opposite sex, and we’re overly involved in work.”
“Wow. You guys are really hung up on this anti-woman thing. Are you gay?” I snickered, but he didn’t seem to think it was funny. “I’m sorry. I was kidding. And honestly, Jase, I wouldn’t care if you were.”
He squeezed my knee, reassuring me he hadn’t taken offense, and pulled up to the valet in front of the Billough Club. I wasn’t aware of the hype this event garnered, but from the front of the building, it seemed to be a who’s who—cameras went crazy as we got out of the sedan. Jase met me on the passenger side of the car to offer me his arm and escort me inside. The flashes from the bulbs were almost blinding. When I came close to losing my footing, Jase wrapped an arm around my waist to keep me stable. Everything about being with him felt comfortable—as if he knew the move I was going to make before I made it. He anticipated my thoughts and needs. I’d never been this in tune with Ryan, and I hated that I felt this way about a man who didn’t see me the way I did him.
It didn’t take Jase long to find his clan, all of whom were there stag and seemed completely enamored with me. They were engaging and respectful, but even with as hot as they were, they lacked the refinement of men who had dated a lot. It was cute to see them fawn over me with just a hint of immaturity. I could see how Jase loved these guys, but I still couldn’t believe any of them were single. They had to be seriously jaded, and I wondered which one of them got burned.
“That would be Willum,” Jase whispered in my ear.
“What?” I asked, turning to him.
“You asked which one got burned—Willum did.”
“Holy crap, I said that out loud?”
He must’ve seen the horror on my face.
“Yeah, but don’t worry, none of them heard it. Right after college, he married the first woman who paid any attention to him. Slone Harway—holy shit she was gorgeous, like put the memory in your spank bank and recall it often, gorgeous. None of us had a clue what to do with a woman like that, and Willum was still a virgin. Once they had sex, that sealed the deal, and nothing anyone could’ve said would’ve gotten him away from her. Thank God his father had the wherewithal to insist on a prenup with an adultery clause, because that whore violated it every way from Sunday and crushed him in the process. It was enough for all of us to take note and put up tall walls. But trust me, we love women.” He winked at me with that half smirk that melted my panties, and I about came undone. He didn’t have a clue what he did to me.
The mingling lasted more than an hour, and Jase introduced me to countless people, but I found myself retreating to the safety of his troop. I didn’t know them, but they were protective, and somehow, even though everyone in the room wanted their attention, they maintained solidarity in their own little bubble. Finally taking a seat, I was surprised we were all seated at the same table—front and center of the room.
I leaned over to Drake, who was next to me, and said, “You guys must be pretty special to get this table.”
His raucous laugh caught me off-guard. “Did Jase not tell you?”
“Tell me what?”
“He’s the guest of honor.”
I imagined he got that invitation based on the size of his contribution, and my heart swelled with pride knowing my friend cared this much about less fortunate people.
“What does that make all of you?”
“Honorable mentions.” Drake gave me a huge toothy grin, and I instantly marked him as a friend mentally. He was ruggedly good looking and seemed uncomfortable in his monkey suit, but I loved that these men were here supporting each other. I held his stare for just a moment, taking in the humor in his crisp blue eyes. My attention was called away by the waiter offering wine selections, and the rest of the night became a blur.
When Jase was recognized, I was dumbfounded by the number of zeroes in his contribution. I couldn’t fathom wealth like that—Ryan and I were well off, very comfortable, but Jase and his friends were stupid rich. He stood and gave a short speech about how the Literacy Guild saved his youth, and I was beyond touched by his heartfelt sentiment. People laughed, but I believed every word he said. He wasn’t making up lines to get a reaction. People were drawn to him and couldn’t fathom he’d ever been anything but successful.
He wasn’t terribly interested in staying to socialize, so after dessert and coffee, he asked me if I was ready to leave. Only along for the ride, I nodded my agreement, but I would’ve rather spent the entire evening staring into those steely gray eyes than move a muscle. His friends offered their goodbyes, and we waited outside for the valet to bring his car around.
“Thank you for coming tonight, Gia.”
I would’ve been this man’s slave if he just kept saying my name.
I leaned into his shoulder playfully. “Thanks for having me. I thoroughly enjoyed myself, and your friends are awesome.”
“Yeah, they’re good guys. Although I think they’re a little jealous,” he commented as he got in the driver’s seat and I took my seat opposite him.
With the doors closed, I continued the conversation. “Of what?”
“You.” He put the car in gear and kept his eyes on the road. I couldn’t tell if there was irritation or humor behind the solitary word he spoke.
“Me? Why?”
“Women like you don’t come along often, Gianna. Surely you know that.” Irritation. But I didn’t know why.
I scoffed, which probably further rubbed him the wrong way. “Yeah, nothing like white trash from the wrong side of the tracks to be envious of.”
With no warning, he whipped the car across three lanes of traffic and came to a sudden stop on the side of the highway. I gripped the handle on the door until my knuckles turned white before daring to face him. Anger radiated from every pore in his body.
“Why do you do that?” he growled at me.
“Do what?” The look on his face had me retreating as far as I could get from him, but the door prevented me from moving much.
“Talk about yourself like that.”
I turned to stare out the window. He didn’t know me or anything about me. He had no right to tell me what to think.
“You’re an amazingly strong woman, Gianna. Why don’t you see that?” He waited for me to respond, but I didn’t even turn to face him. “I don’t know anyone who’s struggled the way you have and continued to push. Every day. And you never complain. Not one time have I heard you utter anything about what you need, but you were concerned about not being able to do for someone else. Who you are at the core has nothing do with the house you grew up in or the parents you were given.” He panted the words as they spilled out. “Damn, Gia—look at me!”
I couldn’t have stopped the tears regardless of how hard I tried. My face was an utter disaster before I ever met his eyes.
“Stop selling yourself short.” His voice softened as he pleaded with me to see myself through his eyes. “Who did this to you?”
I shook my head. He’d never grasp a life he knew nothing about.
“Talk to me, Gia. Help me understand.”
I wanted to hide who I was from him, but eventually, he’d find out, and when he did, he’d leave. His departure from my life was inevitable—I’d just hoped to hang on longer than I’d been able to. So sitting on the side of the interstate, I told Jase what he thought he wanted to know.
“I grew up dirt poor. My dad ran off, and my mom was a burnout. By the time I was in high school, I was living in total squalor and was pretty much on my own. Days would go by, and I wouldn’t hear from or see my mother. I spent as
much time away from the projects as I could manage and was bound and determined to get out. I joined every activity, sport, and social club available, and I pushed myself as hard as I could academically. I applied to colleges in the fall of my senior year and got early acceptance to Dartmouth with a full academic scholarship.” The surprise on his face didn’t go unnoticed.
“What happened? Did you get pregnant?”
I couldn’t help but laugh and roll my eyes. “No. I didn’t. I met Ryan LeBron—”
“Wait—the guy that was all over the news a few years ago?”
“That’s the one, but the guy I knew wasn’t the guy you saw on television. His parents were just as horrid as my own but hid behind wealth. Ryan and I were inseparable through college, and we both graduated with honors.”
“Honors from Dartmouth is pretty impressive.”
I shrugged. I’d worked hard to earn it, but in the end, it hadn’t proven to be worth much. “Anyway, we got married a few months after graduation. He’d landed a great job on Wall Street, and I was doing the whole Madison Avenue gig. We loved life and New York was good to us.”
“I never would’ve guessed you were from New York.”
“You’re missing the point, Jase.” Once I was sure he was focused, I started my story again. I’d only say this once, and he needed to listen. “We were making a ton of money, unlike anything I’d ever experienced before. We bought a house when we found out I was pregnant with the twins, and two weeks after we moved in, the stock market crashed. Ryan lost his job almost immediately. I held onto mine until I had the babies, but before I came back from maternity leave, my company had closed down as well.”
“Holy shit. What the hell did you guys do?”
“That’s just it. Ryan told me he had things covered. He wanted me home with the twins, and he’d found a gig paying more than he was making on Wall Street. I should’ve asked more questions. I look back at it now and wonder how I could’ve been so blind, but when you have two colicky newborns and you never sleep, it’s easy for life to pass you by.”
“Wasn’t he tied up with the mob somehow?” The look on his face was a cross between disgust and understanding.
“More or less. He was laundering money for some pretty big families. I want to condemn him—what he did was wrong—but there were no jobs available, and he had a wife and kids. He was desperate and did something desperate to provide for us—something I sympathize with now but didn’t understand then. If he’d kept his mouth shut and done his time, his boss was taking care of us. We had family surrounding us all the time—making sure we had what we needed, and our bills were paid. The other wives helped with the twins, and when I found out I was pregnant with Emmy right before he was sentenced, they all covered me in attention. But Ryan couldn’t bear the thought of someone else taking care of his children or me. Foolishly, he tried to cut a deal.”
“With the police?” His surprise was tangible. “Is he an idiot?”
“Apparently he was. I had no idea any of this was happening on the inside. He just told me he was taking care of things. That was the last time I ever spoke to him. That phone call to reassure me was the last time I ever heard his voice. You can’t rat out the mob—they kill informants.” I didn’t need to go into the gory details of Ryan’s murder—it had been all over the news for weeks.
“How did you survive?”
“Not really sure other than I had no idea any of it was going on. The families hovered for a long time, months after Ryan’s murder, but after Emmy was born, the big boss and his wife came to me and asked me if they could help me relocate. It was their way of nicely telling me I needed to move on. So that brought me to southern Georgia with three kids and no family. I ran out of money quickly and had no resources. You know the rest.”
“So you’ve been trying to piece your life back together since then?”
“More or less. I just haven’t been able to find a job until I started at Faston. We won’t even talk about what I had to do in order to get there.” I chewed on my bottom lip, wondering why I’d felt the need to share my life with Jase Lane, and why I’d left out the most critical detail in my admission.
“Why didn’t you tell me? I could’ve helped you out.”
“Because that’s not who I am. I have a hard enough time taking handouts from Miss Pearl but figure I’ll find a way to pay her back someday. Until then, I just make sure she knows how grateful we are.”
“She’s the one you were upset about not being able to do anything for?”
I nodded slowly. “By the time we met her, I was down to saltines and applesauce for the kids. She fed my babies when I couldn’t.” That admission choked me up.
“Gia, let me get you moved to another department where you’ll make more money. It’s not like it would be hard for me to do.”
“Uh-uh. Nope. I’m going to earn my spot there, and it’s not going to be because I’m friends with Jase Lane. No way. I’ll never have any respect if I take that option.”
“Which is more important—respect or feeding your children?”
It was like a sucker punch to the gut. He was trying to get me to relent and concede, but it hurt just the same, and he only knew half the truth. “My kids are fed and taken care of. We’re doing okay now.”
He stared at me for an agonizing amount of time before he put the car in gear and drove me home. I sensed he had something brewing in his mind, but whatever it was, he didn’t share. Instead, he dropped me off at my front door like a gentleman and kissed me on the cheek.
“Goodnight, Gianna.”
“Night, Jase.”
~~~
Weekends normally sucked without seeing Jase or having much to do. The kids liked going to the park, but there was only so much to do there, and while they could play for hours, I pooped out and waited on the bench until they couldn’t stand anymore. Sunday came and I expected more of the same, but when Derrick knocked on the door, the kids started going back and forth between the two apartments like a band of wild horses. When the door opened for the hundredth time, I expected a whirlwind of children to stampede through and was shocked to see Jase standing in my kitchen.
“Hey!” I exclaimed, completely shocked. “What are you doing here?” I dried my hands on the kitchen towel after putting away the last dish.
“I wanted to talk to you.” Here we go. At least he had the decency to come to me and tell me he can’t be seen with me anymore instead of just blowing me off. I refused to drop my head in defeat.
“You don’t owe me an explanation, Jase.” I tried to head him off at the pass. I didn’t need to hear whatever he had to say.
“Huh? I came to talk to you about a proposition I have.” He closed the door behind him. “Since you won’t let me promote you at work, I’ve come up with another idea.”
I raised my eyebrows and tilted my head before inviting him to have a seat on the couch. “I’m listening.”
“So my friends really liked you…”
I quirked my brow at him, indicating he needed to get to the point.
“We all have these things we have to go to pretty regularly, and we don’t usually go together.” He was uncomfortable, stumbling over his words, and I couldn’t stop grinning at him. He’d always been a rather eloquent speaker, even in front of hundreds of people at the Literacy Guild, so watching this was amusing. “Anyway, so we were all hanging out yesterday at Drake’s house, and he asked if you’d accompany him to some gala he has next weekend.” The words rushed from his mouth.
I didn’t know what I thought he’d suggest, but hanging out with Drake wasn’t it. I shrugged. “I don’t mind going with him but, Jase, I don’t have the clothes for these types of functions, so I’d have to wear the same dress.” They were all nice guys and all good looking in their own way—if this helped them out, I could do it once in a while.
He wiped his hand down his face. “They would take care of your clothes, Gia.”
I cocked my head, waiting for him
to finish what was obviously on the tip of his tongue. I squinted my eyes and leaned in, silently waiting for more information regarding this proposal.
“You’d be compensated for your time. Paid. You’d be paid.”
My jaw dropped.
I wasn’t sure I’d heard him correctly and knew he couldn’t have insinuated what I thought he had. He didn’t insinuate anything—he’d flat out asked me to be a call girl, a whore, a…hell, I didn’t know what. “You want me to be a prostitute for your friends? Are you insane?” Seething mad, I opened my mouth to launch into a tirade when he held his hands up to stop me.
“No. No. No. You’re totally misunderstanding. These guys don’t date—they don’t trust women, but going solo all the time sucks. They enjoyed hanging out with you, and when Drake asked if I thought you’d go with him, I told him exactly what I thought you’d say. No dress. No money for a babysitter.”
I could tell he didn’t want to give me any more details about the discussion he’d had with his buddies, but he knew he had to in order to calm me down.
He let out a slow, audible sigh before he continued. “I didn’t give them all the information you shared with me. I only told them you had three little kids and had fallen on hard times.”
“So you’re pimping me out?” I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry, be flattered or insulted. I decided quickly, since it was Jase Lane, I’d laugh and be flattered…right before I declined. He had quickly become a friend, and I didn’t have many. I wanted to hang on to him, so I refused to let my feelings be hurt by this, but I couldn’t be a high-class hooker, either.
“What? No! I just thought this would be a way for you to get out of the house with adults and make some money in the process.”
“A whore by any other name is still a whore, Jase.” It sucked he was willing to share me with his group, but it confirmed what I already knew. Jase Lane didn’t date women like Gianna LeBron. Friends, fine. Companion, never.
Fallen Woman Page 4