by Lydia Rose
“I’m happy for you, Jules,” Pam said putting her arm around her friend. “We can’t wait to meet her.”
“When she comes back home, we will get together with you and Lisa.”
“Great and for now, go mingle.” Pam pushed her toward the party.
Jules walked around the living room talking with old friends and meeting some new ones. “Hi, I’m Carol,” the woman said, holding out her hand.
“Jules.” She took the offered hand.
“I heard Lisa telling someone that you’re a golfer and just won a tournament.”
Jules nodded. “My girlfriend is the reason that we won that tournament.”
“Is she here? I’d like to meet her.” Carol smiled. “I’m a big fan.”
Jules looked at her shocked. She hadn’t told Carol her name, but someone must have told her. “She is on the West Coast at a tournament.”
“Is Paige back on the circuit? I used to watch her all the time until her accident.” Carol looked down. “I’m sorry.”
Jules touched her arm. “Paige is fine. You have nothing to be sorry about.”
Carol now looked up and smiled. “We should play a round sometime. It might be fun. Although, I doubt I am in your league.”
“Hey, I’m done with competitive golf. I want to go back to just having fun.”
Two of Carol’s friends walked over and she made the introductions. “I was just telling Jules that we should play golf sometime.”
“We have a tee time tomorrow at the club at noon. Come with us,” Sarah said to them.
Carol and Paige looked at one another. “Sure. I’d like that,” Jules answered. Playing golf would be better than sitting around the house thinking about Paige.
The phone call that Jules had been waiting for all day finally came. “Hi, Paige.”
“Hi, baby. How are you?”
“I’m fine. Tell me how you did today?” she asked, both excited and anxious.
“I came in third,” she said feeling dejected.
“It’s okay, honey. I’m sure you will kick ass tomorrow. Besides, it’s the first time you’ve been on tour in over two years.”
“I know. I just couldn’t believe how many shots I missed today. Easy putts became impossible. I shouldn’t have tried this.”
Jules could feel Paige’s pain through the phone and wished she could be there to hold her tightly. “Paige, calm down. You’re letting your head play the game. You are a talented golfer.”
“I wish you were here with me.” Her voice showed such pain.
“I wish I could be there too, but you don’t need me to be there to win. You are a professional. You can do this, Paige. I have faith in you.”
Paige sighed and laughed softly. “How do you do that to me?”
“Do what?” Jules asked giggling.
“Make me feel like I can do anything.” Paige couldn’t believe how her life had changed since this wonderful woman came into it.
“Because you can. Believe that, Paige.”
“I’ll try.”
Jules laughed again. “How are your legs feeling?” she asked, changing the subject.
“Good. I didn’t even think about them when I was on the course.”
“You can do this, baby. Maybe you can’t win your first time back, but you are back doing what you were born to do and I’m so proud of you.”
Paige sniffled. “I love you. Do you know how much I love you?”
Jules chuckled. “I do and I love you too.” She rubbed her eyes drying her eyes. “Hey, I’m playing golf tomorrow.”
“Really. Are you playing with Eileen?” Paige asked, glad that they were no longer talking about the tournament.
“No. I met these women at Pam’s party and we’re playing tomorrow.” Jules waited for Paige to comment, but she suddenly got quiet. “Paige, did I lose you?”
“I’m here,” she answered softly.
“What’s wrong?” Jules asked hearing the sudden change in Paige’s voice.
“Nothing.”
“Are you jealous?” Jules asked laughing.
“No. Yes,” she admitted, but she knew deep in her heart that Jules would never cheat on her.
“Why are you jealous? It’s just golf with some women.”
“Women that I don’t know. Women who are going to fall in love with you after spending a day with you,” Paige let out a strangled moan. “I’m sorry, Jules. You must think I don’t trust you.”
“No, but I do think you are feeling the strain of the tournament. Honey, I love you.” Her laugh filled the air. “Even if you are three thousand miles away. I still love you.”
“I’m being an idiot. I’m sorry.”
“Stop saying you’re sorry. It’s okay, baby.” Jules wiped her eyes again as a smile touched her lips. “So when are you getting back?”
“Ah…Jules, I...”
“There’s another tournament.” Jules fell back onto the bed and closed her eyes. “Where?”
“Vegas, but it’s not a tournament. It’s a conference for sponsors. I need to get some sponsors if I’m going to go back on the tour.”
Jules’s mind was going a hundred miles an hour. She wanted to scream at Paige and say I just found you. You can’t do this to me, but those thoughts stayed inside her head. Instead, she calmly said, “Do what you have to, I understand.”
“Do you, Jules? You aren’t just saying that?” she asked afraid.
“I won’t lie and say I’m not disappointed that you aren’t coming home, but I know what I sighed up for, dating a golfer.”
“But I wasn’t on the tour when we got involved. Are you sorry, Jules?”
The pause between her question and Jules’s answer seemed forever, but she had to get her thoughts together first. “I honestly don’t know if I met you as a professional golfer, if I would have gotten involved. I know your career is important to you just as mine is to me. Paige, we will work this out together. Do what you have to and I’ll be waiting.” As soon as the words left her mouth, a strangled cry left Paige’s mouth. “Honey, are you okay?” Jules could hear Paige blow her nose. “Talk to me, honey.”
“I don’t know how I got so lucky to have you in my life.”
“I’m the one that is lucky. You are the best thing that has happened to me.” Jules hoped her words could convey what was in her heart over this difficult phone call.
“No I’m not. I left you alone.”
“You’re coming back, Paige and I’ll be here waiting for you.”
“Will you wait for me at my house Wednesday night?” she asked sniffling.
“Of course, I will. Get some rest tonight and kick some ass tomorrow.”
Paige giggled softly. “I’ll try.” She paused a moment. “Jules, have fun tomorrow with your friends.”
“I will. I love you.”
“I love you too. Good night.”
Jules wished she could be there with Paige to hold her close. To prove that she would be there for her in any way she needed, but all she had werewords now. “Good night, my love.”
CHAPTER 21
Sleep had not been easy to find last night. Jules’s thoughts were filled with worry for Paige. She knew that Paige thought she was letting Jules down and worried that she would come home to find she had lost her. Jules also worried about spending her life with someone who was always traveling, who would always be in another state. Could she love Paige enough not to let the distance between them destroy them?
Jules parked her car at the club and spotted her golfing partners waiting. “Hi,” she said walking over to them.
“You’re with me, Jules,” Carol said walking toward one of the golf carts. “Sarah and Tina aren’t very good golfers.” She chuckled. “They will probably end of spending most of the time trying to find their balls.”
At the first tee, Sarah was up first. Jules cringed as she sliced the ball to the right. As Carol had said, Tina did the same thing. They walked back to the cart. Jules took her shot and hear
d a whistle behind her. “You play very well, Jules.”
“Thanks. I had a great teacher.” Jules now watched as Carol took her shot. “Very nice,” Jules said as they walked back to their cart.
The two women spent their time golfing and getting to know each other. “You are very easy to talk to,” Carol said as she sat down in the cart.
“You are too.” Jules chuckled. “It wasn’t so easy for Paige and me in the beginning.”
“You really like her, don’t you?” Carol asked, feeling disappointed that this woman would end up being nothing more than her friend.
“Like is too simple when it comes to Paige. I am head over heels in love with her.” The smile on her face said it all.
“Does she feel the same way?” Carol asked hoping to find a crack in the relationship.
“She does,” Jules said nodding her head. “I’m a very lucky woman.”
“How are you handling her traveling for the tour?”
“This is Paige’s first tournament since we got together. It’s hard being away from her, but I know how important this is to her.” Jules meant what she said, but she couldn’t hide the pain she felt away from the woman she loved.
Sarah and Tina caught up to them at the eighteenth hole. “how about we all have dinner tonight?” Carol asked as she took her ball from the final cup.
“I’m sorry, but we’re having dinner at Sarah’s parents’ home. It’s her mother’s birthday.”
Carol turned to Paige. “How about you and me?” she asked smiling.
“Sure.” She knew if she kept her mind occupied, she might not think of Paige constantly.
Once the carts were returned, Carol and Jules said goodbye to Sarah and Tina. “I’ll pick you up in an hour?” Carol asked.
“Sure.”
Jules walked into the house and went to the kitchen for a bottle of water. Eileen was sitting at the kitchen table with her iPad. “I won’t be home for dinner.”
“How was golf?” she asked, resting her tablet on the table.
“Good. Carol played well, but her friends were terrible.”
“Are you having dinner with them?” Eileen asked watching her sister drink down the bottle of water.
“Just Carol.”
Her eyebrow came up. “Are you interested in her?”
Jules spit out the water that was in her mouth. “No. She’s nice and it will keep my mind off Paige.”
“Does Carol like you?” Eileen asked suspiciously.
“You mean like me, like me?” Eileen nodded. “No. We’re just friends. She knows I love Paige.” She threw the empty bottle in the trash. “I’ve got to get ready. Carol will be here shortly.”
The doorbell rang before Jules came down the stairs. “Hi,” Eileen said opening the door. “I’m Eileen. Jules’s sister. Please come in, Carol.”
“It’s nice to meet you, Eileen.” She now looked around for Jules.
“She is still getting ready. Can I get you something to drink?” Eileen asked leading her toward the living room.
“I’m fine,” she answered taking a seat. “You live with Jules?”
“Yes. This was our parents’ home and I was...” Eileen almost slipped and told a complete stranger about her illness. “It’s worked out for us this way.”
Carol looked at the pictures on the mantle. “Is that your daughter?”
“Yes. She’s next door at a sleepover.”
Carol continued looking at the pictures and didn’t see a man in any of the photos except for what only could be Eileen and Jules’s father. “How old is she?”
“Eight, but somedays it feels like she’s twenty.” They both laughed at Eileen’s comment.
Jules finally came down the stairs. “Hi, Carol. I’m sorry I wasn’t down here to greet you, but I’m sure Eileen has kept you entertained.” She was wearing a pair of well-worn jeans and a light sweater. “Are you ready to go?” Jules now took notice that Carol was wearing a similar outfit.
“Why don’t you come with us?” Carol said looking at Eileen.
“Me?” she asked touching her chest.
“Yes or do you have something else planned?” Carol looked toward Jules to also extend the invitation.
“You should, sis. Alice is next door for the night. Come with us.”
She looked at her clothes. “Give me five minutes to clean up a little.”
“You don’t mind that I asked your sister?” Carol asked softly.
“Of course not. It’s not like we’re going on a date,” Jules said chuckling.
Eileen came down the stairs at a fast pace. “I’m ready to go,” she said grabbing a sweater from the hall closet. Her tan slacks and loose blouse fit her fit frame and she noticed how Carol’s eyes traveled over her body. Eileen couldn’t help the small smile that appeared on her face. It was a long, long time since anyone looked at her approvingly. “Where are we going?” she asked as Jules climbed into the back seat which left her to sit in the front seat beside Carol.
“Does everyone like Italian food?” Carol asked turning to look at the two women.
“We do,” Eileen answered for herself and Jules as she strapped herself into the seat.
The car ride to the restaurant was filled with conversation between Carol and Eileen as she told her sister about the round of golf that day. Eileen now peeked around the seat. “How come you didn’t tell me how funny Sarah and Tina were?”
“I didn’t have the time because I had to get ready. You were more interested in knowing if Paige knew I played golf with these women.”
Eileen glanced at Carol who laughed. “You must be the protective sister?”
“Guilty as charged, but I’m the oldest so it is my job,” she answered giggling.
Jules was so happy to hear her sister laughing and enjoying herself even if it was from the attention of a gay woman.
During the meal Carol continued to flirt with Eileen, but what was surprising was that her sister seemed to enjoy the attention. She even began to flirt too. Jules sat there wondering if the chemo had changed Eileen’s chemical balance in some way. She now felt her phone vibrating and she looked at the screen seeing Paige’s face. “I have to take this call,” she said to the two women who seemed to be oblivious to her comment. Jules found a quiet corner and answered the call. “Hi, sweetie. How did you do?”
“I finished second.”
Jules could hear the excitement in her voice. “That’s wonderful. I knew you could do it.”
“I didn’t win.”
“No, but that was great for being away so long. What did you lose by?” she asked quickly.
“I lost by two.”
“See. You’ll get it the next time.” A group of people walked by loudly.
“Where are you?”
“Having dinner with Carol and...” Paige cut her off.
“You’re having dinner with whom?”
“One of the women I played golf with today.” Paige got quiet. “Are you still there?”
“Yes.”
“Eileen is with us and you wouldn’t believe what’s going on?”
“What?” she asked suddenly interested.
“Carol is flirting with my sister and Eileen is enjoying the attention.”
“But Eileen is straight.”
“I know, but she’s not acting like it right now. I don’t think they even realized I got up from the table.” Jules peeked into the dining room and saw her sister’s head thrown back with laughter. “You don’t think the chemo changed her?”
Paige laughed. “No, honey. Maybe your sister decided to see how the other half lives?”
“Who knows? I just hope she doesn’t toy with Carol’s emotions because Carol looks very smitten.”
“Smitten, huh?”
“Yeah. It’s so weird.”
“Don’t interfere, Jules.”
“How could I not?” Jules said running her hand through her hair. “I don’t want to see my sister hurt.”
“Jules, i
t’s her decision.” Paige sighed wishing she could be there with Jules. “I’ll call you tomorrow evening.”
“Okay,” she answered softly. “I love you.”
“I love you too. Good night.”
Jules stuck her phone back into her pocket and walked back to the table. The two women sitting there didn’t even notice her return. “Are you ready to go?” Jules asked, which caused their heads to turn and look at her.
The ride back to the house was quiet. Jules sat in the back seat watching the two women glance at each other with unspoken words. As the car pulled into the driveway, Eileen turned toward Jules, “I’ll be inside in a few minutes.”
Without a word, Jules left the vehicle and went into the house. She paced back and forth in the living room waiting for her sister. Unable to wait any longer, she peeked out the front window. In the front seat of the car, Carol and Eileen were kissing. “Holy shit,” Jules said against the window pane. She stumbled back and sat down. A few minutes later, Eileen walked into the house and took a seat next to her sister.
“Okay, let’s have it,” Eileen said softly.
Jules sighed loudly. “What are you doing? You aren’t gay.” Eileen remained silent. “Aren’t you going to say anything?”
“I don’t know what happened tonight. Carol walked into the house and I was just drawn to her.” Eileen took a breath. “Maybe I’m bisexual.” Jules growled at her words. “I’ve been speaking with men on the internet and the moment I told them about the cancer and my surgery...” she paused a moment, “I never heard from them again. I told Carol about it and all she did was take my hand.” Eileen turned on the couch. “You don’t know what it’s like, Jules, to have everyone think of you as damaged.”
“I don’t want to see you get hurt, Eileen and just because some men are assholes is no reason to think you are gay.”
“It’s my life, Jules. There is just something between us that I’ve never felt before in my life.”
“You’re horny. I understand that,” she said chuckling.
“It’s more than that.” How could she explain to her sister that being with Carol tonight felt natural? Had she buried her feelings for women a long, long time ago?
“When are you going to see her again?” Jules asked knowing she wasn’t going to be able to talk some sense into her sister.