by Rue Volley
“Beth, I think we should talk.”
My heart stopped for a minute as I thought of him saying what I did not want to here. That he had found some good girl who wanted a family and shit and that I was no longer good for him.
I took a huge drink and finished the remainder of my mixed cocktail and set the glass down. I lifted the black napkin and dabbed the corners of my mouth, refusing to appear greedy or trashy in any way. Mani watched me as he always does, with interest and compassion. I need those, the mixture of the two and having him wanting to discuss anything other than where we will be fucking is not needed. I do feel for him, if love should be used to explain it then so be it. He would deserve love, he does deserve it and hopefully I am enough for him. The idea of him rejecting me is a terrifying thought. I would be left with what? Ryan? I already know what that is. I already accept that Ryan and I are bound by tragedy. What I do not want to accept is that in the end it will be him and I, still trying our best to destroy each other. Mani is not that, he is light and air. He is happiness that I keep just out of reach.
I set the napkin down and stared at it and then decided to stop running from his need to talk. I normally stop him when we are alone by kissing him and reaching down to make him harder than he already is. He leaned up and interlocked his fingers on the table and then I regained my composure.
“I know you feel as if you have to stay, Beth.”
I leaned back and pulled my hands to my lap, dragging the ruby ring along with the retreat. I looked down and then back to him hoping this would be quick and painless. He must have brought me to a public place to try to avoid a scene. I have to admit he is smart, but I am not exactly a “scene maker” kind of woman.
“Loyalty is not a crime,” he added as he looked me over and I lifted my face to look into his eyes, eyes I so enjoyed seeing, eyes that had not seen me at my worst, but at my best…with him.
“Mani,” I started to say and he interrupted me, which was unlike him.
“I love you Beth, I do,” he said quietly as the waiter returned with new drinks and I was grateful. I grinned, looking up at him and took it from his hand before he could place it on the table. I then started to drink until the entire thing burned my throat and filled my stomach. I coughed a little bit as I placed the empty glass down on the table and both Mani and the waiter stared at me in disbelief.
“Would you like another?” he asked and Mani said “No” as I said “Yes.” Mani leaned back and watched me as I dabbed my mouth again. I grinned at him and pulled my compact, checking my lipstick and hair, and then I clicked it shut and stared at him with a new found coldness, well not so new as it was for me to just be acting towards him. This Beth was the Beth Ryan gets, the one the outside world gets. Not Mani, he gets the one I had fought to become, vulnerable and giving, needy and weak. As I mulled it over in my mind it helped me become even more aggravated that this was not going as I hoped it would.
“Beth, you should slow down on drinking.”
I laughed and it echoed in the back of the restaurant. I scanned the room hoping to see the waiter Ryan and I used to come to see. Perhaps I could get a fuck in the bathroom.
“Don’t be concerned with me, Mani. I am a grown woman, I can handle myself.”
Mani raised an eyebrow and was set back with my tone. I never spoke to him in this way. Without emotion and feeling but he felt the wall go up and the Vodka helped me along.
“I think you misunderstood me,” Mani said and I looked at him and shook my head.
“I understand everything as I always have. You simply want more and I can’t do it so I know where that leaves us.”
“Beth…no.”
I tapped his hand as I leaned in.
“Don’t, I don’t need pity. It is beneath me.”
He shook his head and grabbed my hand with more force than I needed. He jerked the ruby off of me and I pulled my hand back and rubbed it as he held the ring in his fingers and stared at it.
“This thing is probably full of poison,” he said as he held it up and eyed it. I snatched it from him like a 2 year old does a toy they refuse to share. I held it tightly in my palm until he cleared his throat and pulled a box out and set it on the table in front of me and my heart skipped a beat in my chest. I stared at it, so beautiful and small. It was tasteful, as Mani is, not elaborate and overbearing as I was used to. The box held what I could only assume was a token of his love for me and the ruby suddenly felt like it weighed 100 pounds in my hand. My eyes filled with tears and I turned on the seat so he could not see my emotional state. He slid towards me and I felt his hand on the small of my back before I turned to look at him, a single tear rolling down my cheek. He wiped it away with his thumb as his palm cupped my chin. I smiled at him and shook my head.
“What is it?” I asked him and he leaned down and looked at me, raising my chin and forcing me to stare at him as he spoke.
“A promise, for a better future Beth. I know you are not ready now but someday you will be and I will be right here, ready and waiting for you.”
I wrapped my arms around his neck and held him so tightly he had to pull me from him. He glanced at the box on the table as he laughed again.
“Maybe you should look before you get all excited.”
I smiled and picked the box up. I opened it slowly as I stared at a beautiful ring. It was filled with smaller diamonds along the band and in the middle it was shaped like a four pointed star with a larger diamond in the middle. It looked old and vintage, as if it had lived forever on the hands of those who loved the most, with the purity it deserves. I touched it as I continued to cry softly and Mani moved closer to my side and held me as his heat offset the shock and cold I felt in my body. I pulled it out and the low light caught each diamond and sparkled, it was perfection. Something I would have bought for myself and worn proudly. A beautifully crafted thing meant to represent a deep and everlasting commitment. I swallowed and looked at him.
“I am married.” And he grinned at me.
“A man can hope,” he said as he took it from me and raised my hand up, he started to try to place it on my left hand and I switched to my right. He accepted it as there was no way I could just place a promise of such magnitude on my wedding finger as I was still legally married to Ryan. Suddenly the idea of
NOT being married to Ryan seemed to become a possibility, a real one and I was happy. A true happiness I never knew I could have. I hugged Mani again as I heard a throat clear and I let him go and looked up to see Ryan standing there with a woman next to him. She was younger than we are, long blonde hair, blue eyes, nothing like me, in fact the opposite of me in all ways. Ryan smiled and stared me down and then extended a hand to Mani who took it as Ryan lingered like the curse that he is.
“What are the odds?” Ryan asked as the woman laughed next to him and shifted her weight from one foot to the other. I looked her over and pulled my hands down, bringing the ring with me. Ryan was too busy being a cocksucker to notice it but he was here with one purpose, to interrupt and be an asshole. I already knew it and so I sucked up the emotions and closed off my feelings to weather the storm.
“Amazing odds, seeing that we used to come here so often Ryan,” I said as I looked at the woman. She looked around and then leaned into Ryan’s ear. He placed a hand to her back as he always did to me in the past and I knew he was fucking her. Did it matter? Not so much as his barging in here did.
“To the back, baby,” he said as she left him and he watched her ass. He wiped his lip with his thumb and turned back to me.
“So,” Ryan said as he slid in and moved me over a little bit. I sighed as I pushed against Mani and he did not cause a scene. Ryan pulled a cigarette and lit it up, sucking in the smoke and then letting it roll out not unlike I did. I wanted to immediately light one up but I did not as Mani was not a fan of smoking so I tried my best to not do it around him. Mani coughed and waved a hand, leaning back and staring Ryan down.
“You seem to be up and movi
ng around pretty good,” Mani said and Ryan took another drag and snapped at the waiter. It echoed and made me blink. I hate his brutish behavior when he is like this. He acts like a dick. The waiter walked up and Ryan smiled at him.
“Scotch, on the rocks.” The waiter started to walk away. “Make it four.” He said and I held a hand up. Ryan looked at me and smiled.
“Too good to drink with me Beth? I remember a time when we drank together almost as much as we fucked.”
“Ryan,” I said as I looked at him and shook my head. He smelled different, not like he normally did. He always wears a deep cologne, I love it and it is a clean smell, but it was mixed with a sweet aroma that I could not recognize. Mani leaned in and stared at him.
“Your eyes are dilated Ryan,” he said. Ryan smiled and leaned back as he took another drag of his cigarette and then starred at it.
“New blend, Turkish,” he said and Mani continued to look him over.
I then spotted the black ring on his right hand, it looked like it was covered in pure silver and flat on the top. It was round and Ryan noticed I was staring at it. He smiled and licked his bottom lip. Then he held the ring up and stared at me.
“You like it Beth?” he asked me and I leaned back and wondered what the fuck his game was because with Ryan there always is one. He then fingered at it and rubbed it like it was his new treasure. The woman started to walk back towards our table and Ryan grinned at me as he suddenly turned the top of the ring and the woman stumbled, moaning quietly as she touched her stomach. I was completely confused but Ryan bit into his lip and allowed her to join us. He then held the ring up and she laughed at him.
“You are a dirty boy,” she said as she laughed and I watched both of them wondering when a coherent explanation would occur.
“Ryan,” I said and he looked at me.
“Beth,” he said with sarcasm as the woman leaned in and whispered into his ear. He reached under the table and she moved slightly. I knew what he was doing and I refused to fucking let it bother me. I mean why would I? I was here with a man who actually cared about me, not Ryan who felt it necessary to torture me for fun.
“What’s with the ring?” I asked him and the girl adjusted on her seat as he laughed.
The waiter returned with the four drinks and placed them on the table. Ryan picked up his glass and held to me like a toast.
“It is a game, you should play it sometime, I am sure it would loosen up that tight ass of yours.”
Mani leaned forward and I touched his leg and shook my head. Ryan noticed and tossed his drink back without as much as a cough. Truth was Ryan was an expert at drinking. If you have never known a functioning drunk then you would have a hard time understanding how they are able to do what would seem to be normal functions. Ryan then reached down as he stared at me. The nerve he has is nothing short of astounding. The girl suddenly made a small noise as Ryan pulled his hand up back and turned the top of the ring. I leaned in as I could hear something very faint, she leaned back and touched her lips as the humming continued. He turned it and she stopped.
“What the hell…” I started to say and Ryan reached down as the girl hissed and his arm moved. He continued to stare at me as I tilted my head and fingered the edge of the glass in front of me.
“Ryan!” she yelled as he pulled his hand up and he had a small silver cylinder in it. He smiled at me and then dropped it in my glass. I blinked as I saw it in my drink.
He then took the ring off and tossed it towards Mani, it rocked back and forth on the table.
“If you can get it in her tight cunt then good luck, the ring controls it. Have fun.” Ryan said as he pushed the girl out of the large booth and she muttered something as she adjusted her dress down and I saw a bit of her shaved pussy. Of course she had no underwear on, why would she?
“You are an asshole,” Mani said as Ryan smiled at him.
“No, you just don’t know her like I do,” he said and with that he left us sitting there as Mani started to rise and I stopped him again.
“Don’t. It is not worth it,” I said as we watched them leave the restaurant.
“I won’t have him disrespecting you this way.”
I laughed. “That was not disrespect; you have not seen Ryan that way.”
I looked at my glass and shook my head.
“I have herpes in my glass,” I said and Mani laughed as did I. I was thankful to have some humor after so much seriousness but I refused to credit Ryan for it, although it was purely his doing.
Chapter Five
Step Out Of The Closet
I let my tongue slowly trace the lines of his perfected abs. Mani was certainly in shape, his muscles tone, his body sculpted from years of working hard at it and speaking of hard. I reached down and wrapped my fingers around the shaft of his cock and slowly stroked it as I continued to lap at his twitching stomach. He reached down and grabbed my hair, pushing me down. He was normally not like this. He was gentle and accepting of whatever I offered to him, but I do believe that he was challenged by Ryan. I grinned as a deep moan rose up from the back of his throat. I do remember a time that Ryan responded to me this way and I to him. It was a toxic love, something I was more addicted to than actually needed. Want is a vicious thing you cannot even fight. It is a demon, something that lurks deep in the hearts of humanity. If anyone should be fearful of anything it should be of themselves. We all hit a place in time where we know what will consume us and yet we allow it. I let my thumb slide over the head of his dick as I bit into his lower abdomen and he jerked up, laughing a little bit, but I placed my hand on his chest and pushed down, he laid back and allowed me to continue on. There was no reason not to.
I stopped, leaning up and let my hair fall over my shoulder. It slid across my erect nipple and felt good. I sighed, as even something as simple as that set my senses on fire as I continued to move my hand up and down on his large cock. I squeezed it and I swear I could feel his heartbeat. Mani is quite large as I have mentioned before. His length is just above average but what is the most pleasurable is the width as any woman will tell you. He makes me so wet that if he was small it would be fucking annoying, but even with my pussy aching and wetter than it has been in years, when he enters me it momentarily stops my breathing.
I placed my lips on the tip of his cock and flicked my tongue against the smooth skin; he moaned again, acting as if he wanted to fight me but knew that he would never be able to. I looked up his body, catching his eyes staring at me as I took the length of him to the back of my throat in one push. I remained there longer than he expected and then applied pressure with my tongue as I pulled it out ever so slowly. I meant to torture him a bit. It is a game I had recently started with him and he seemed to enjoy it more and more. He had not experienced me as Ryan had. My rough nature never seemed to surface with him which surprised me to a certain degree. I mean I had always enjoyed sex on the rough end of things but with Mani it was almost as if love was an actuality and not just a fleeting dream.
I continued to suck, slowly at first and twisting my hand as my mouth took him in and out like he was fucking my pussy. I closed my eyes and reached down between my legs and slipped two fingers into myself, needing it more than I realized. I moaned as I shoved his cock to the back of my throat again and rose up, allowing him to watch me finger at myself as I sucked him off. His moaning deepened as I knew he was nearing a climax and I had no intention of stopping. I wanted him to come in my mouth so that I could taste him and swallow everything he had to give.
He then sat up quickly and pulled himself from my lips as he flipped me onto my back and straddled my face. I stared up at his cock as he lowered and I guided him into my mouth. I reached up and grabbed his ass, digging my nails into his skin as he thrust downward and shoved the length of himself into my mouth. I moaned and he lowered his face. He placed his fingers on either side of my pussy and spread it open, taking no time to shove his tongue deep inside of me and moaning as he allowed the vibration to stimul
ate me even further. He fucked me with his large erect tongue as he thrust over and over again while fucking my mouth with a mild aggression. I continued to squeeze at his ass as he pulled his tongue from me and lapped at my clit. It made my legs shake and he grinned as he could feel me tightening up, all my muscles twitching and starting to fire off with waves of pure ecstasy.
He then pulled his cock from my mouth and looked down as I tried to lick the tip of it, but he was teasing me at this point. I leaned back as he turned and scooped me up on the bed. My legs hung over his arms as he leaned in and kissed me, the lingering taste of pussy consuming me and making my body tremble even more. He pulled me from the bed and turned me to the wall, leaning me against it and reaching down, guiding his cock up into me as deeply as he could. I hissed as he always took my breath away with his size. He started to fuck me slowly, rotating his hips and rubbing himself against my clit which was already highly sensitive. I bit into my lip and then kissed his mouth as he quickened his pace, holding me up with ease and trying his best to make me come.
“I want to feel your pussy come on my dick,” he whispered to me as I smiled.
“I will come when you do,” I said to him as the game continued on. I knew we could force this to last, we had fucked for 3 hours before not allowing an orgasm to take either one of us but when it did we were exhausted, but it was so worth it.
“What can I do for you Beth?” He said as he sounded out of breath.
“Fuck me,” I said as he grinned at my ear.
“I thought that I was.”
“I mean fuck me like you hate me,” I said before I really thought about how it sounded. He slowed down a bit but never said ‘no’ to me.
“Like this?’ he said as he suddenly thrust upward and it hurt but in a great way.
“Oh my God,” I said as I wrapped my fingers into his thick hair and pulled on it. He thrust upward again and I made a noise he had never heard from me before, more animal than human.
“So you want it?” he said in a low voice as I nodded and stared at him as he fucked me harder and harder. I pulled at his hair, unlike I had done any time before with him, he hissed but never complained to me about the pain. In fact I think he may be enjoying it, if not he was hiding it very well. He then turned me and dropped me onto the bed as he walked to his large armoire and stopped to open it up as I leaned up on my elbows. He opened it up and my eyes widened as I saw a few things I never expected to, whips, chains and leather masks. He then turned with a large anal ball rope and I swallowed hard but felt my whole body light up as he let it swing back and forth from his finger.