by C. S. Janey
He pulled away, releasing my face as he let out a sigh. “You should go to bed and get some rest. We will have a long night tomorrow.”
“You didn’t answer my question.” I wanted to stomp my feet with frustration.
“And I don’t plan to.” His face shuttered, my brief glimpse of the depths he was capable of reaching gone in an instant. “Goodnight, Lucy.”
I took the rest of my clothing and dashed from the room, my eyes filling with tears at the realization I left the conversation more confused than when I’d entered it.
Chapter Four
Annalina chattered away the next afternoon as I cooked us some brunch. We’d slept late, the trip having taken its toll on both of us. Bradley was nowhere to be found, the only evidence of him having done anything before leaving earlier involving a half-pot of coffee.
“Do you usually stay here mom? This is such a nice place!”
I threw her a smile over my shoulder as I finished frying the eggs and turned off the burner. “Yes, it is, isn’t it?”
“He seems really nice.”
I frowned, but cleared my face before turning toward her with our plates. Setting them down on the table, I took a seat as I responded. “Mr. Blackwell is nice. He’s also very busy, so I don’t want you to get in his way, okay?”
She rolled her eyes at me. “Come on, mom. I said he’s nice. That doesn’t equal interesting, not to me.”
I started to eat, not saying anything.
She smiled at me. “He seems to like you, though.”
I dropped my fork at her statement and as it clattered to the floor, she laughed.
“You shouldn’t say such things!” I picked it up and walked over to get a new one. “He’s my boss.”
“Why not? Grandma does. When you’re gone, all she does is comment that she bets you’re more than a personal assistant. What else do you—“
She cut off at the glare from me as I came back to the table. “Your grandma shouldn’t be saying that to you.”
She shrugged, a motion I’d come to hate seeing from her. “She says a lot. She says you’re in love with him. She said it’s the only reason you still do this after two years.”
My mouth dropped open as my face heated. “Anna! Do not repeat this to Mr. Blackwell, do you got it?”
At the clearing of a throat from the doorway, I froze and stared down at my plate.
Annalina giggled and stood up. “Uh...hi Mr. Blackwell. Mom and I were just um…finishing up eating.” Then she took off.
The little traitor. I’d deal with her later and my mother wasn’t going to like what I had to say to her when we got back home.
“Lucy?”
Bradley’s voice, amusement apparent, had my face flaming all over again. I squeezed my eyes shut, wishing the floor would open up and swallow me. I wondered how much he’d heard.
“Bradley.” My heart pounded with anxiety. “How long have you been standing there?”
“Long enough.”
“Oh god.”
His hand on my shoulder was the only indication he’d walked closer. “Don’t be embarrassed. She’s a thirteen year old girl. I hear they can be quite a handful.”
“Yeah.” I cleared my throat. “Did you need something to eat?”
“Look at me, Lucy.”
I lifted my head, sure my face was red with embarrassment.
“We will talk about this later,” he said with a wink, which only made me blush even more. “For now, make me a fresh cup of coffee and bring it to my office. I’ve got some work to do.”
I nodded and he brushed his lips against mine before turning around and walking out.
Putting my head in my hands, I took a few moments to calm down before doing as he asked.
~*~
Placing the cup of hot coffee down on his desk, he didn’t look up from his work even as he spoke to me.
“You will need a formal gown for the dinner. There is a shop I visit that knows me really well; I buy all my clothing there. They are expecting you at one and they will simply add it to my bill.”
When I didn’t say anything, he looked up and lifted a brow at me as if asking if I understood.
“Um, what about Anna?”
He put down his pen and steepled his hands under his chin, smiling at me. “She isn’t going. She will be with a friend’s wife and their two children. You will meet them before we go out to dinner, since they’re coming here. Is that a problem?”
I swallowed. “I thought she’d be going with us. I don’t even know your friends.”
He scowled and stood up. “Do I seem like the type to have untrustworthy friends?”
I shook my head. “No, but who would ever admit their friends aren’t trustworthy?”
“Do you trust me, Lucy? Enough to know I would never leave your daughter with someone I don’t trust implicitly?”
“You could’ve told me.” I put up my hands as he came around the desk toward me. “Don’t.”
He sighed and leaned against the desk, making his whole body open to my gaze. I stared at him with defiance.
“I figured you knew I meant she could come with you here, not that she could go to dinner with us. Nobody brings their children. She will be fine.”
“We’re in a strange place to her. I can’t just leave her with complete strangers.”
“They are only strangers to you. I’ve been friends with Roger and his wife, Amanda, for twenty years. They have two children, a son named Landon and a daughter, Emily. Emily is the same age as your daughter, and Landon is two years older. And again, you will meet them.”
My relief at hearing they had a daughter the same age as mine was pushed aside by the knowledge that Bradley must have talked about me to them, and I stiffened.
“Do they know about me?” Stupid question, Lucy! “That is, do they know the nature of our relationship?”
“They know you are my date and that you have a daughter his wife will be watching. That’s it.”
I sighed. “Why isn’t his wife going?”
“She doesn’t like to attend such things. She doesn’t like all the people.” He shrugged. “Roger always takes his secretary, but he adores his wife. Sickeningly, if you ask me.”
I laughed at his last statement. “It doesn’t surprise me that you’d say such a thing.”
“Why’s that?” He straightened, his body close to mine once more. I shook my head and he put his hands on my shoulders. “Tell me, Lucy. You’re very opinionated lately, so I want to hear it.”
I shrugged his hands off and stepped back. “I’m always opinionated. I’ve just never been so around you. The rules, remember?”
“Tell me.” He didn’t make a move toward me again and I sighed with relief. “I’m asking. You can say it.”
“You just don’t seem like you’ve ever adored anyone enough to know what it’s like. You’re not disgusted — a part of you is jealous of what they have.”
He whistled. “Those are some big assumptions.”
Now, I was the jealous one and his glinting eyes told me he knew his words had instantly conjured up thoughts of him in love with another woman. “I’d say they are right.”
“You’d be wrong, Lucy. And this conversation is over.”
“Wrong about which part? Adoring someone, or being jealous of what they have?”
He shoved a hand through his hair and stepped toward me, pulling me into his arms before I could blink. His body was tense and I could feel every bit of him against me. He was angry at my questioning, his words low in my ear.
“I would love to have what they have. And I had it once. But I’m not jealous. I just know the kind of devastation being that in love with someone can bring down upon you.”
I pulled my head back, staring up into his eyes and seeing a pain I’d never encountered before. I was almost afraid to ask, but now that I’d gotten him to admit to something personal, I wasn’t willing to stop there.
“Who was it?”
He
clenched his jaw, staring down at me even though I don’t think he saw me. His mind was somewhere else.
“Bradley?”
He blinked, his face clearing. Then he smiled down at me, making him look so boyish that my heart squeezed. “I wanted to wait to do this, but I suppose now is as good a time as ever.”
“What?” No idea what he was talking about, I steadied myself as he released me and walked over to a desk. Opening a drawer, he pulled a box out and came back to me.
My heart dropped into my stomach as he cupped my face in his hands, tilting my head to meet my eyes with his. “I want you to marry me.”
All I could do was stare at him, not sure he’d really just said that. But before I could respond, or address my confusion at this sudden turn of events, a squeal of girlish happiness came from behind me.
“Oh my gosh, I knew it! Grandma was right!”
Glaring at him, I looked down at my watch as my daughter approached. “Look at the time! I have to go get a dress.” I looked at Anna and smiled before looking back at Bradley. “Anna, Bradley has something he’d like to talk to you about. I’ll be back in a bit.”
Walking from the room, I looked back over my shoulder to see Bradley grinning at me as my daughter chattered in his ear.
Somehow I knew he’d make me pay for that later too.
~*~
When I returned two hours later, dress in one hand, a bag with all the accessories and shoes in the other, Bradley was locked in his office. Annalina was sitting on the couch and jumped up to follow me into the bedroom as I walked past.
“What did you get, mom? I wanna see!”
“You can see it later,” I said as I hung it up in the closet. “But I’m not sure I like it.”
“You’ve been gone two hours! How could you spend that long and buy a dress you didn’t like? I wouldn’t buy a dress I didn’t like.” She flipped her hair over her shoulder and put her hands on her hips.
I smiled despite myself, her attitude amusing me. “I usually wouldn’t either, but I had to pick something. This was the least…showy.”
Her eyes widened, mouth rounding with excitement. “Oh, now I really wanna see! Please?”
I shook my head as I turned to head into the bathroom to get a shower and she followed me.
“Okay, okay! What color is it then?”
“Green.”
She made a face somewhere between curiosity and disgust. “I hate that color but you look good in it. I bet it’s pretty! Oh, I can’t wait to see it.” She clapped her hands together before exiting the bathroom.
When I came out of the shower a bit later, she was sitting on my bed watching TV. Figuring that changing out of the robe now would be a waste of time, I sat on the bed next to her.
“Did Mr. Blackwell tell you about this evening?”
She didn’t even glance at me before nodding. “Yeah. He said that it was an adult only thing and would be boring. But that Landon and Emily are close to my age and that their mom is pretty fun!”
My eyebrows rose at this but I said nothing. “Fun, huh? Did he say what she had planned for you guys this evening?”
She shrugged, then flipped off the TV and beamed at me. “So?”
And just like that, the convo I’d been dreading since leaving earlier had arrived. I pretended to not know what she was asking.
“Sew buttons.”
Rolling her eyes, she poked me in the leg. “Are you gonna say yes?”
I wanted to scream ‘yes!’ and how much I loved him, but this wasn’t quite the way I imagined him proposing to me. “I don’t know. I’m not sure…”
She got up on her knees and started bouncing on the bed. “Don’t be crazy mom. He likes you! He wouldn’t propose if he didn’t mean it, would he? He must love you!”
Her idealism made me want to wince. To a kid her age, people got married because they loved each other. But Bradley didn’t love me. I didn’t know his game, but I knew that much.
I put a hand on her knee to stop her bouncing and looked into her blue eyes, so like her fathers, and smiled. “How about I promise not to say no without hearing him out first, okay?”
“I guess,” she grumbled, then put her hand on her stomach. “I’m hungry again.”
And just like that, the topic changed.
I knew it wouldn’t be that way with Bradley, yet I still couldn’t wait for later.
Chapter Five
“Wow, Mom!”
Annalina’s eyes widened as I slipped the dress on. Emerald green silk with spaghetti straps, the bodice smooth as it crisscrossed, each side heading down into the smooth horizontal piece around the lower waist before falling straight down and meeting the floor. And then she gasped as she caught a glimpse of my back in the mirror.
“Oh my gosh! You can almost see your butt crack, Mom!”
And promptly dissolved into a fit of giggles as my face burst into flames.
Ignoring her laughter even as my lips quirked, I reached into the bag to pull out the pumps that matched my dress and slipped them on. She finally calmed down after I’d put in the hair combs like the lady at the store had suggested, making my curly hair appear dressed up without having to mess with it all that much, just the way I liked it.
“What do you think?” I twirled and she burst into laughter again at the brief glimpse of my bare back. “I know, I know! I told you I didn’t like it!”
The bell ringing had her jumping up from the bed and running out the door, eager to spend time with kids her own age, no doubt. I hesitated on going out to meet them without Bradley, but shouldn’t have worried. He stuck his head in mere moments later and slipped inside the room, closing it behind him.
“Beautiful,” he said with a smile. “Turn around.”
My face burned even as I did what he said, the low whistle of appreciation from him ending as I turned to face him once more. He stepped closer and wrapped his arms around my waist, bringing my body flush against his, the palm of his hand searing my bare skin.
It was the first time I’d seen him in a tux and he looked even more elegant than usual. Next to him, even in this lovely dress, I didn’t feel as beautiful as he no doubt thought I was.
“You look pretty good yourself,” I observed, bringing my hands up to rest on his upper arms. “First time I’ve ever seen you in a tux.”
“Did you pick this dress out?” At my nod, he grinned. “You did a great job. This is definitely your color.”
“The back…”
He shook his head. “Completely normal I’m afraid. You’ll have to get used to it. Besides, I like it. A lot. I’ll be touching you all night now.”
“Bradley…” I licked my lips as a wicked smile spread across his face. “About earlier…”
“Ah, yes. Nice move, by the way. Leaving me with your daughter was a pure stroke of genius.”
“You surprised me,” I replied with a blush. “And she thinks you’re just my boss!”
“I know. I surprised myself.” He kept ahold of me with one hand, putting the other into his pocket and pulling out the box. “I was serious though.” He held it up, his face sobering.
“Why, Bradley? This is out of nowhere…”
His eyes moved past me and I waited, wondering what was going on in that mind of his. Afraid to move or breathe, I watched a play of emotions on his face and filed them away for later as he finally looked back at me.
“I’m not very good at this.” He swallowed as I squeezed his arms reassuringly. “I like you and we get on well. I know…I know it’s not a love declaration, but I’m not really sure that will ever happen. However, I miss you when you’re gone and I just think you should be here all the time. Once a month isn’t enough anymore.”
“It’s not just me though. It’s my daughter. And my mother, twenty-four seven.”
He nodded. “I know. But we both know how busy I am. Not much would really change, except you’d be here and you could sleep next to me, every night.”
It might be si
lly to say my heart skipped a beat, but it did. The sincerity in his voice — and his eyes — had me seriously considering saying yes.
The fact I loved him and he didn’t love me blared loudly in my head, but I ignored it. He didn’t have to know I loved him. I simply hope he fell in love with me before he ever guessed the true reason I accepted.
Because I couldn’t imagine a life without him and this is what he wanted. In truth, what I really wanted and had hoped for, even if it wasn’t exactly how I’d imagined being proposed to. So I’d give it to him.
“Okay.”
It may have seemed like a very unenthusiastic answer, but his face lit up as if I’d just given him the best gift ever.
Little did he know that I was dancing on the inside as he slipped the ring onto my finger and sealed it with a hungry kiss.
~*~
Leaving the room to meet Amanda and head to the dinner, my daughter squealed as her eyes fell upon my left hand that was wrapped around Bradley’s arm.
“Oh my gosh, I knew you’d say yes!”
Bradley grinned, I blushed and the woman I could only assume was Amanda raised her eyebrows. I couldn’t tell her age by looking at her as she looked young, but was probably around the same age as Bradley. Her two kids were over on the couch ignoring all of us.
“Hi,” I nodded at her, offering my right hand to shake. “I’m Lucy. I see you’ve met Annalina.”
My daughter came close to stare at my hand and Bradley chuckled. I released his arm and she automatically took my hand into hers, examining the ring with a giggle.
Amanda stepped forward and clasped my hand in hers with a smile. “Nice to meet you, Lucy.” Then she looked at Bradley. “Congratulations, although we had no idea it was all that serious…”
He shrugged and Amanda looked back at me as if she wanted to say something, but didn’t.
Yes, I definitely knew him better than most people. That much became glaringly apparent in that moment.
I tugged my hand from Annalina’s and put it around her shoulders. “So, what will you guys be doing?”