by Shelly Crane
He yanked away, almost slipping in the snow, and paced a few feet away before turning back to face me. “This entire time, you’ve listened to me defend her…”
“Your whole world was crumbling, Seth.” I looked at the ground because I didn’t know what else to do. “You kept clinging to her. I didn’t know why, but I… I felt like you needed to keep her if that’s what you wanted.”
“Ava,” he said with a sigh, “Uncle Gaston tried to get me to bond with Harper a couple years ago.”
I yanked my head up, breathing the cold air painfully, pulling my shoulders tight to myself. “What?” I barely whispered.
“I always thought it was just him, that she didn’t want to just like I didn’t. It felt…wrong.” He shook his head. “We were always family in my mind. Always. Even if we’re not blood. And when he brought it up…Harper was there. I started to protest and she jumped in, too. I just assumed that she was just as adamant as I was, but she was just following my lead,” he realized. “She wanted to bond to me.”
“You were the one they chose to force the imprint with.” He was already nodding, figuring it out, too.
“Gah, Harper, why?” he said to the air.
It wasn’t hard for me to see why. “I’m so sorry.”
He looked at me like I was crazy. “What the hell, Ava? Don’t be sorry for her, or them, or any of it. I got you out of this.” He came to me, stalking really, so slowly that my breathing had picked up by the time he reached me. “I’d live all this all over again if it meant I got you in the end.”
“Stop,” I pleaded as he took my face in his big, calloused hands.
“I’m not gonna stop.”
I felt my eyes watering in the cold air. “Seth,” I begged him. He’d been through so much. He did not deserve this. He did not deserve some psycho girl trying to pick him out of the line-up just because she decided she wanted him, because he was the only one in her family that she could have because he wasn’t blood related to her. Though I knew that wasn’t all true. I’d seen the way she looked at him. She could have fallen in love with Seth all on her own even if they’d met somewhere else. It wasn’t hard to fall in love with him. I’d done it in a mere week.
He puffed a harsh breath against my cheek, listening to my internal rant. “Ava.”
“I’m not sorry that all those things led you to me. I’m just sorry that you had to go through them for it to lead you to me.” I closed the foot of distance between us, the snow crunching under our feet on my front lawn. I wrapped my arms around his neck as best I could with his height. He helped me, widening his legs to make himself shorter. “If you had stayed with your mom and had a normal life, do you think we still would have found each other?”
“I would have found you anywhere,” he rumbled, squeezing his fingers on my hips.
“I believe you.”
“You need to go inside,” he said and gulped down his dislike of that, of us separating for the night. “It’s too cold to be out here like this.”
“Yes, it is.”
We both turned to find Dad coming out the front door with a cup of something steaming in his hand. Seth straightened and sighed a little in aggravation.
“I’ll…come in the morning, I guess. But I won’t see you tomorrow night. I’m on for forty-eight hours and I have to sleep at the station.”
“Come inside, Seth,” Dad ordered, using his Champion voice. “You, too, Ava. It’s freezing out here.”
“Sir,” Seth started, but I put a hand on his chest.
“Stay with me tonight,” I said softly.
His eyes bugged a little before he looked at Dad and then back at me. “Your parents won’t mind?” he whispered.
“No.” I chuckled. He cocked his head a little. I took his hand and knew I had some explaining to do on the way our kind handled things. “We’ll just be sleeping, right?” I asked coyly.
He looked at Dad in the porch light and answered loudly. “Of course.”
Dad laughed and slapped his back hard as we passed him. “Oh, Seth. Don’t worry, son. We’ll have the talk after dinner to make sure you know exactly what sleeping entails.”
I giggled and Seth shot me a raised brow. I shook my head and rolled my eyes as I took his hand and laced his fingers with mine, dragging him into the living room. When Mom saw us I thought she was going to burst right out of her skin with happiness.
Rodney had been at school so much that he missed a lot and was pretty shocked to see the civil and, dare I say even, lovey version of us. He was still skeptical, I think, and kept eyeing Seth sideways. It was going to be a process with him. But that was okay. We had time.
Dinner was okay. We talked, we laughed, we were normal, and that was more than I could ask for these days.
Dad took Seth off to the living room for a few minutes to talk and when he brought him back, it was pretty comical the look on his face.
“You okay?”
“Of course,” he soothed and waved to my mom. “Thanks for dinner, Mrs. Jacobson.”
“Maggie, please,” she pleaded.
“Maggie,” he said and it sounded so strange coming from his mouth. He looked at the clock on the wall and then at me. “Ready?”
“Yeah.” I nodded.
“Night, all,” he called.
“Night,” I said and couldn’t help but feel a little twinge of weirdness at heading upstairs with my boyfriend.
“Oh, don’t worry,” he said and chuckled, placing his hand on the small of my back as he guided me upstairs. “There will be nothing but sleeping going on, trust me. Not after that talk with dear old Dad.”
I smiled as I looked back at him. “Um, sorry?”
“It’s okay. He’s your father,” he reasoned and pressed up against my back. “Which one’s your room?”
“This one. What about your clothes?” I looked at him over my shoulder.
His nose brushed my cheek. “I’ll go home in the morning, shower and change before work.”
Work clothes… The thought of him in his fireman clothes made me smile. And my neck turn pink.
He laughed under his breath. “We don’t wear the garb all day. Only if there’s a fire,” he whispered conspiratorially and kissed my cheek over my shoulder.
I smiled and opened the door, letting him in first, watching him as he took in the room. I turned on the music in the corner. “I Feel It All” by Feist came blaring through the speakers so I turned it down a little and turned to face him. He went to the radio and messed with it, turning the songs, one after another, until I heard “I Only Have Eyes For You” come singing through my speakers.
I opened my mouth a couple times before I finally said. “How did you know I loved The Flamingos?” But it came out only breath as their voices slid over us. He didn’t answer me, only slowly came to me and pulled me against his chest, hugging me to him by my waist, nuzzling his face into my hair. I sighed and gripped his upper arms.
“Seth.”
Neither of us said a word as he walked me backward to the bed and laid me down on top of the covers, following me down, laying on his side and cupping my face, letting that thumb cause me heart palpitations, but he stayed right there, out of reach. “Seth,” I complained again through ragged breaths.
“What it is, sweetheart?” he asked, like he had no clue. But he knew.
“Why won’t you kiss me?”
He let a breath go through his bitten lip. “After that talk I just had with your father—your father the Champion—I just…”
“You just what? There’s nothing wrong with kissing me. I’m your significant. Daddy has no room to talk. He used to sneak in Mom’s window and I know they didn’t sit in there and play Scrabble all night.”
He sighed again. “I feel like your mom is watching or something.”
“She can’t. She can’t see anyone that has her blood. Meaning me. And since you’re a Watson, they gave you her blood, because she can’t read you either.”
“What?”
I nodded. “All the Watsons have my Mom’s blood so she can’t read their minds. Something they figured out a long time ago. They must have given it to you because she can’t read your mind.”
He scrunched his nose. “They gave me your Mom’s blood?”
I ran my hand down his face. “Don’t think about that right now.” I bit my lip.
He looked at my mouth and I saw the change come over him as his eyes hooded a little. “Ava,” he said.
It sounded like a scold. It was kind of hot the way he kept saying my name and nothing else, as if that was enough.
“Seth.” I leaned in, taking his collar in my fist, pressing my forehead to his. I pushed to find out what my father had said. He was thinking about how my father had told him that he knew we needed to sleep together, that sleeping apart was dumb and unproductive if it just meant I would be hurting in the morning, but he expected Seth to be respectful of me and this house, of the rules set forth in it. That he expected us to sleep on top of the comforter and I was the boss at all times. That he wasn’t an idiot and knew we’d be…doing things any significant couple would, but that Seth better be careful with me. But the laws and rules of our kind still applied. That with everything going on with the Watsons and the Jacobsons, all Dad cared about was keeping me safe. Seth agreed.
Before I could think, his mouth was covering mine, just once. He breathed against my lips and smiled. “You’re gonna get my ass kicked.”
I giggled and pulled him closer. “I’ll protect your ass.”
He rumbled a laughed before rolling over, letting his arm brace above my head to hover over me slightly, but not enough to really count because he wasn’t touching me anywhere else. He was using that space as a barrier.
I let my hands grip and tug at his short, dark hair and collar as his lips claimed mine again—his lips eager, his tongue commanding, his hand never leaving the pillow, not once.
His legs were restless at the other end of the bed, but I realized he was kicking his shoes off, so I kicked mine off, too. I rubbed my socked feet against his, letting my calf wrangle between his. His feet were so much larger than mine and that fact made me want to giggle for some reason.
We kept at it for a while, but before long, he rolled over on his back and beckoned me to him. I put my face in his neck and curled against his side. He took our hands and laced them on his chest. When he sighed, I sighed too, out of sheer necessity. And then I fell asleep so easily.
Safe.
Warm.
Happy.
Significant in someone’s world.
_ _ _
“I kissed her, Ava.”
I looked at him with a smile a mile wide. “I…I’m so happy. I can’t believe it. What did she say? What did she do? What happened?”
He laughed, happier than I’d ever seen him. “She kissed me back.”
I laughed, but it slowly drained away. “Wait…if you kissed her, then everything is right as rain, right? All is well in la-la land?”
He smirked. “Yeah. Yeah, my little poet, right as rain.”
“Then why are you here? Why am I still here? Why are she and I still separated? Is something still going on?”
“No,” he comforted and came across the terrace toward me. He took my hand and smoothed my hair back that the wind was whipping around. “No, I think everything will be okay on that front.”
“So you can kiss me, then?” He looked unsure. “We’re the same person. If you’ve kissed her, then you can kiss me.”
He shook his head side to side with a small grin. “You’re so much like her. She asked me to kiss her tonight, too.”
“I am her,” I whispered and tilted my head.
He moved forward and I held my breath. He took my face in his big, warm, take-charge hands and brought me up to meet his lips. I closed my eyes, a little disappointed in him and thrilled all at once. But at the last moment, he turned and kissed my cheek, so close to my mouth. He whispered, “Soon, the two of you will merge back together and all of this will just have been a dream. But I can’t kiss you. I know you’re technically the same person, but it doesn’t feel right to. I wanted to come and say goodbye. To thank you for all you did to bring us to together.” I opened my eyes to find him so close. He rubbed his thumb across my chin. “You’re the reason I found you. You’re the reason I was able to bring Ava home.” He palmed his chest, looking so emotional in that moment that I wanted to cry.
I smiled. “I’ll miss you.”
“No, you won’t.” He smiled and hugged me hard. “You got me, sweetheart.”
“She better realize what she’s got.”
He laughed and kissed my forehead before leaning back. “I’m with her now.” My eyebrows raised. “It’s our first night together.” They raised higher. “Just sleeping.”
I smiled, biting my lip in between my teeth. He shook his head and reached up to release it with his thumb. “She does that, too.” I gave him a teary smile. I didn’t know what else to do. I knew this wasn’t goodbye, but it still felt like one. “I’ll see you soon, little bird.”
I nodded. “And I’ll remember everything?”
He nodded. “If not, I’ll tell you everything. I promise.”
I nodded harder. “Okay.”
“Thank you. You saved us.”
“You saved me.”
“Now,” he set me away and posed me against the railing, “let me draw you on the terrace with London at your back. This is a memory I want to keep.”
I breathed in awe, “You can draw?”
He laughed, shaking his head.
_ _ _
I smacked the alarm and found Seth right where I left him. So it hadn’t been a dream. And wow, not waking up in pain and withdrawal was not just awesome, but it rocked. I didn’t just feel good, I felt amazing. I felt like I’d been eating vegetables and taking vitamins in my sleep.
I rolled over to face him, feeling not near as bold as I’d been yesterday as I looked down at his scruff. I didn’t know why last night had felt different. Maybe being with him all day or something was the difference, but now the shyness was there again, the little edge of awkwardness that hovered when he was near. One day didn’t make all that go away.
“As long as you don’t go back to hating me.” He cracked an eye open and then the other. “How do you feel today?”
I took a deep breath, filling my lungs with the air of a new day. “Pretty marvelous.”
He smiled. “Do you…remember?”
I squinted with a confused smile. “Remember that you somehow know that I love the Flamingos?”
His smile shook, but he tried to hold it. “Yeah,” he sighed. “We had a great day, right? You remember all that and we aren’t going to go back.”
That wasn’t what he meant, I knew it. There was something he was keeping in the back of his mind, something he didn’t want me to see…but he did want me to know it. It was like he wanted me to figure it out on my own and was disappointed when I didn’t. He looked down at me and watched me work it all out, knowing I was right, but saying nothing.
I laid back down and stared at the ceiling. “I don’t understand why you hear everything that’s in my head. Truly.” I focused on blocking him out, but it was an actual effort to do so. It was like I had to sit there and think about it every second to be able to do it. Normal significants only got into each other’s head if they tried. It wasn’t this way.
“Maybe,” he sat up and looked at me, “it has to do with them giving me your mom’s…blood or something.” He grimaced. “I don’t know. Does it bother you that bad?”
“Badly,” I corrected absentmindedly and then pressed my lips together, snorting a little.
His face lit, looking pleased for some reason. “I kinda like it. Correction,” he leaned a tad closer, “I really like.” When his fingers touched my jaw to make me look at him, I wasn’t hit with his calm like usual because I’d been absorbing it all night. I felt a little sad that I couldn’t experienc
e that buzz his skin could give me. “I like being in that pretty head of yours.”
“I don’t care if you’re in my head,” I said truthfully. “I just wish it was the same for me. It’s a lot of work to open my mind up to yours all the time and you don’t even have to try. All I get are just a couple bits and pieces here or there. It’s not fair.”
“Maybe that’s one of my super powers,” he joked and laughed once, but his mind was shut to me. Once again, that thing that he was hiding…
“You can just tell me,” I hedged.
His eyes jumped up, surprised that I just blurted it out. He smiled suddenly, surprising me. “You’re so much like…”
Her.
He couldn’t stop the thought before it was out there. I recoiled, feeling as though he had punched me in the chest. I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to roll over, but he stopped me, cupping my cheeks.
“Look at me, Ava.”
“After everything, after you know how I feel about her—” I whispered, my heart literally breaking in my chest.
“I would never have said you reminded me of Harper. Not before last night and especially not after it.”
“Then who are you talking about, Seth?” I asked, almost hysterically. “Who is her?”
He licked his lip, sighing and putting his forehead to mine before pulling back and looking at me for a second. “I told you I dream about you.”
I opened my mouth to ask, but he laid his forehead to mine and showed me a clip or scene of us from his dream. We were in my room and he was talking to me, cupping my face on my bed.
It was so vivid and we were so sweet together. I guess it was what he wanted to happen back before it did—when we fighting and he didn’t know how to solve it. So he had dreams about us.
I opened my eyes and found him watching, waiting for me to yell and tell him to leave, that I didn’t believe him, that I wanted him to go, that he was a liar. “Why would you think I’d do that?” I asked softly.