by Tania Sparks
Cody chuckles and replies, “Yeah, I look forward to receiving yours too.”
“You’d better go.” I whisper.
“I know.” He replies, but continues to just stand there.
Hansen yells out from inside the limo, “Sticks, get your ass in here!”
Cody gives me one last soft kiss and mumbles, “Bye sweetheart.”
“Bye.”
He steps away from me and I instantly feel heartbroken.
He gets inside the limo and pulls the door shut. The car pulls out. I wave goodbye and watch as the limo drives off down the road and disappears from sight.
It feels like a part of my soul is driving off down the road and already I miss him like hell. It suddenly dawns on me the enormity of this whole long distance thing. This is going to be hard, really, really hard.
Dad puts his arm around me. “I’m so sorry Kitty. It would have been okay if you had gone you know.”
“I know Dad.” I lie.
We walk up the path and into the house. We wander into the kitchen and I try to put on a cheery face, “Right, what would you like for breakfast?” I ask.
Dad fluffs around beside me, “Pancakes?” he suggests.
“Pancakes it is.” I reply as I busy myself to try to forget the pain I feel deep in my heart.
Chapter 16
It’s five o’clock in the afternoon and I’m sitting in my room feeling very sorry for myself. I keep imagining what everyone else is up to. They would have arrived in LA by now, probably all settling back in their own homes, perhaps going out to Trixie’s club tonight, having a bit of fun, getting back into the swing of things. I feel so left out, so alone and so very, very lonely. Not that I begrudge being at home here with Dad. He needs me and I’m glad to be here for him. I’m just torn.
I decide to have a nice hot shower in the hope that perhaps it will help me feel a bit better. I get up and go to my ensuite bathroom, turn on the shower and remove all of my clothes. I step into the cubicle and let the hot stream of water cascade over my head. It’s not long before I start to remember the last time Cody joined me in the shower. I slowly run my hands over my body, imagining that it’s his hands that are caressing me. I close my eyes and my mind starts to drift as thoughts of his skilled fingers, talented mouth and the dirty words he normally whispers to me consume me. It’s almost as if he’s here with me, my imagination is so vivid that the sensation of my hands drifting over my skin makes it feel like they could be his hands.
I don’t know how long I stand under the water, but I’m suddenly brought to my senses by the sound of my phone ringing. I open my eyes and look over to my phone that’s sitting on the vanity. After a few more seconds the ringing stops and the call goes to voicemail. I sigh and return to the relaxing water only to hear my phone ringing again. I guess whoever is calling must really want to talk to me. I step out of the cubicle and peer at my phone. I quickly notice that it’s Cody calling and a pang of excitement hits me. I simultaneously grab the phone, hit the answer button and grab a towel, awkwardly wrapping it around me. I say cheerily, “Hey Cody, I didn’t expect to hear from you so soon.”
A rumbling voice answers, “Hey Kitty, I’ve literally just walked in the door at home and I couldn’t wait one more second before I called you. I thought you weren’t going to answer for a minute there…”
“Yeah, sorry about that. I was in the shower.”
I hear a grunt from Cody then he groans, “You mean you were in the shower, like naked?”
I grin, “Well yeah, I’m normally naked when I have a shower.”
“You still naked?” he asks.
“Well, I have a towel, but yeah I’m naked.”
“Send me a picture.” he demands.
“Cody, I’m not sending you a naked picture.”
“Why not?” he asks seriously.
“Because…”
“Okay my shy little hottie. I’ll just have to imagine you…hmm.”
The line is silent for a few seconds and I wonder whether the line has disconnected. “Cody, you still there?”
“Yeah, I’m here. Just imaging that beautiful body of yours, all wet and naked…”
I smile and decide I should tease him a little more, “I was thinking of you when I was in the shower you know.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“What were you thinking about me exactly?”
“I was imagining your hands all over my body.”
“Were you touching yourself you naughty girl?”
“Maybe…”
“Hell Kitty…tell me about it, how did it feel?”
I ponder excitedly if we’re really going to do this. I’ve never had phone sex before, but doing this with Cody is sending a thrill through me. Cody repeats his question, “How did it feel honey?”
I walk over to my bed, let the towel drop to the floor and lie down. “It felt nice.”
“Hmm, nice huh…I think we can do better than nice. Where are you now Kitty?”
“On my bed.”
“Where are your hands?”
“One’s holding my phone and one’s just beside me.”
“Well, they’re no good there now are they. Put the phone on speaker and put both your hands on your body. If it were me touching you, I’d be using both hands to touch and explore.”
I press the speaker button on my phone and put it down on the pillow beside me. “Where shall I put my hands?” I ask.
“Put them on your beautiful tits. Imagine your hands are my hands. Touch yourself like I would touch you.”
I place my hands on my breasts and hold myself firmly, allowing my nipples to peek through my fingers.
I hear some loud shuffling on the other end of the phone, so I ask curiously. “What are you doing?”
“Hell, if we’re gonna do this, I need to be lying down and I need to be naked. Just give me a sec to get my clothes off.” I hear more shuffling and I chuckle at the desperate sound of him removing his clothes as quickly as he can.
After a few short seconds he says, “Okay, now I’m naked too. Tell me where your hands are baby.”
“On my breasts.” I reply.
“Hold those tits like I would hold them sweetheart. What about your nipples, are you rolling your nipples between your fingers?”
I answer with a simple groan.
Cody groans as well, “That’s it baby, I wish I could see you. You’re so freaking hot. I can just imagine what you feel like, what you look like. Does that feel good?”
“Mmm hmm.”
“Move your hands down to that beautiful pussy. I’m just dying to know if you’re wet for me. Tell me, is this turning you on?”
I move my hand slowly down my body, my fingers reach their destination only to find that I’m already very wet. I groan and tell him, “I’m wet, even just the thought of you touching me turns me on.” I hear Cody groan erotically on the other end of the phone so I ask him, “Are you touching yourself Cody?”
“Hell yeah.” He replies resolutely. “I’m imaging it’s your hand that’s wrapped around my cock, and it feels so fucking good.” He groans again. “Do you have a vibrator Kitty?”
“Umm, yeah.” I reply hesitantly.
“Is it handy?”
“Umm, yeah. It’s in my bedside table.”
“Take it out and use it darlin’. Let me hear you moan. Imagine it’s me inside you. Make yourself feel good.”
I reach over to my bedside table and take out my trusty vibrator. I turn it on and slowly lower it down to my pussy. “Okay I have it.”
“Is it inside that sweet pussy?”
“No, not yet.”
“Well hell sweetheart, slide it inside and turn it on. I want to hear you get turned on, I want you to imagine it’s me, I want to hear you come.”
I’m already so wet that it slides in easily. I turn it on and the vibration instantly causes tickles of sensation. I moan, “Oh God…that feels…”
“Does that
feel good darlin’?”
“Yeah, that feels good, but this is gonna be quick. Hearing your voice, having this feeling, God Cody…”
“That’s it…feel it…imagine it’s me. I’m imaging it’s you that’s wrapped around my cock. You feel so good…you feel amazing…”
We both loose concentration as we lose ourselves in the sensations we’re creating. All as I can hear is Cody’s moans and groans on the other end of the telephone line and his reaction is causing me to become even more turned on. We keep caressing, keep moving. This feels so amazing, not quite as good as the real thing, but still really, really good. My orgasm quickly builds and my breathing becomes more and more rapid. Cody’s breathing and moaning is matching mine as we both pant and bask in the bliss we’re creating.
“You gonna come?” he asks.
I can barely answer, this feels so good, but I manage to mutter, “Yeah, yeah, I’m going to come…”
“Me too sweetheart, I’m gonna hold on until I hear you come and then I’m gonna come too. Fuck, you feel so good…”
“I, I…”
“That’s it…”
“Oh my God…” I groan as my orgasm explodes and causes my whole body to vibrate with erotic sensations. I’ve never come this hard with only a vibrator before. It feels amazing. I hear Cody groan as his orgasm explodes too, he mutters, “Fuck…”
We’re both breathing heavily, both wordless, both trying to recover from this experience. Cody talks first, “Hell Kitty, I’ve only been back home for literally five minutes and you’ve already completely blown my mind with phone sex.”
“Yeah, that was good. Even better if you were actually here with me, but that was a pretty good second option.”
We spend the next hour talking, not about anything in particular, just keeping each other company. After a while Dad comes and knocks on my door, “Dinner’s ready Kitty.”
“Okay thanks Dad.” I turn my attention back to the phone and tell Cody, “My dinner’s ready, I probably should have been helping Dad with that. I had better go.”
“I wish you didn’t have to go.”
“Yeah, me too.”
“Wish you were here.”
“Yeah me too.”
“Do you have any plans tonight?”
“No, not really. Probably just sitting here with Dad, watching some TV, maybe I might start getting some of my school stuff organized. How about you?”
“We’re all heading out to Trixie’s Club. Not that I really feel like partying, but it’ll be good to see what her set up is like.”
“That would be cool, have a great time and be good.”
The line is silent for a few seconds then I hear Cody take a deep breath. “Kitty, I’ll be good I promise. Honestly, I swear, other girls don’t interest me. I won’t cheat on you. In fact I’ll probably spend the whole night sulking and thinking about you.”
There’s an awkward tension between us as I reply, “That’s not what I meant. I know you won’t cheat Cody…”
“I know sweetheart, but I just want you to know that I consider us to be, well you know…together. Whether we’re on the opposite side of the country, or opposite side of the world, I’m yours and you’re mine. Distance won’t change that darlin’.”
“I know Cody. I’m just being silly. It’s just that I miss you is all.”
“I miss you too.”
“I have to go now Cody. Poor Dad will be sitting there eating dinner all by himself. If I’m going to be here to look after him, I had better go do it properly. Bye.”
“Bye darlin’. I’ll call you tomorrow.”
“That would be good. I can’t wait. Bye.”
“Bye.”
I hang up the phone but my heart sinks. I trust Cody, I really do, but I know for sure that he’s going to receive attention from numerous girls. It’s a simple fact of life. He’s a sexy as hell rocker that attracts girls wherever he goes. I’m not the jealous type, but this is going to be the reality from now on. He’s going to be out partying, being put right in the pathway of all sorts of temptations. I know he would never cheat on me, but I suspect that it won’t be long before I get that dreaded and inevitable phone call from him telling me that the long-distance thing isn’t working for him and that he wants the freedom to see other girls.
I walk out to the kitchen, put on a brave face and a fake smile and sit down to have dinner with Dad.
Chapter 17
It’s been a few weeks and Oblivion are now in Europe. I’m told their tour is going extremely well. They’re playing to sold out stadiums everywhere and the welcome and reaction they’re receiving from fans is incredible. I feel so pleased for them.
Cody and I have been speaking on the phone or Skype at least daily, which has been fantastic. We talk for hours and I’ve even had the courage to send him a few sexy photos, but of course whenever I do that our next conversation always turns rather hot and steamy.
But when we’re not on the phone I’m really struggling. I miss him so much. I find that I’m constantly hanging out all day, just waiting for that time when we can talk again. My school work is suffering too. It’s not just the fact that I miss Cody like mad, but I miss my Mom too. Everything seems so different, so wrong and out of place. My emotions are constantly swinging back and forth between happy and sad and I feel constantly lost.
Each time Cody and I speak it gets harder and harder to hang up. I simply don’t want to break that connection. I find that each evening I’m so excited to hear his voice that I feel happy, the time we spend together on the phone is amazing, but as soon as we hang up, my emotions go into turmoil again and I feel so very sad. Night time’s the worst. When I’m lying in bed alone with only my thoughts to keep me company, everything feels so much worse. Everything feels so pointless and difficult. It feels like a cloak of darkness is slowly encroaching on me. Each day I feel a little sadder. The only thing that gets me out of bed in the morning is the fact that I need to look after Dad.
Dad’s doing okay, all things considered. I know he’s trying to keep up a brave face for my benefit, but I can tell he’s suffering without Mom. Just seeing him makes me even sadder. It’s simple things like having to set the table for two people instead of three and seeing Dad’s sadness as the place setting in Mom’s space is missing. The other day he was getting us both a cup of coffee. I saw him grab three cups from the cupboard and carefully place them on the kitchen bench, including Mom’s favorite cup. It wasn’t until he went to pour the coffee that he realized the mistake he’d made and he solemnly picked up Mom’s cup and put it back in the cupboard. I guess it will take us both a very long time to get used to not having Mom around.
It’s not just Dad, I miss her greatly, I even miss her at random times, like when I can’t remember one of her favorite recipes or just when I need some motherly advice. Lately I’ve found it easier if I just ask her anyway. I probably look like a crazy person speaking out loud to ask her advice, but somehow I think she’s listening because the answer usually just comes to me. I don’t know if it’s just my memory working to help me or whether it’s Mom somehow telling me, but either way it gives me some comfort feeling like she’s still looking out for me.
Dad sees that I’m struggling too and he constantly tries to encourage me to go out with my friends, but I just don’t feel like it. My friends are constantly trying to cheer me up and are always inviting me out, but I never go. I wouldn’t want to be out on an evening when that’s the time I get to talk to Cody.
The days blend together and the only light is my daily phone call with Cody. It’s a Tuesday night and I’m sitting on my bed waiting for Cody to call. I know it’s already well past midnight where they are, they don’t have a show tonight and I they’ll be travelling on the tour bus between cities, so he won’t have much privacy to talk.
The phone rings and I quickly answer it excitedly. “Hey Cody!”
A familiar voice answers, but it’s not the one I’d been waiting for. “Hey, lil’
sis. Sorry it’s only me. Hope you’re not too disappointed,” Nikki chuckles.
Although I am disappointed it’s not Cody, I’m still pretty excited to talk to my big brother. “Hi Nikki, nice to hear from you, what’s up?”
“Oh you know, a busy tour, shit loads of travel, endless hotels, lots of busy schedules. S’all good though, the fans make it worth it, they’re amazing. They’re so freaking pumped to see us, the shows have been awesome. So anyway, enough about me, what’ve you been up to? How’s school going?”
“Hmmm, okay I guess. To be honest I’m struggling a bit. I’m finding it pretty hard to concentrate properly. I really miss Mom and I miss you guys too.”
I don’t really want to tell Nikki the extent of how much I’m struggling. He has a busy tour to worry about, he doesn’t need to be worrying about me and what’s going on at home. Nikki continues to tell me all about the tour but after a little while I start to get a bit concerned that we’re talking for too long and I might miss Cody’s call so I tell Nikki, “I probably need to get off the phone, Cody might be trying to call.”
Nikki clears his throat and then says in a very apprehensive voice, “Yeah ’bout that…”
The tone of his voice instantly makes chills run down my spine. “What’s wrong?” I ask.
“Well, I don’t think you’ll hear from Cody tonight.”
“Why? I thought you guys were all travelling on the bus to Munich tonight?”
“Yeah, well the rest of us are.” He pauses hesitantly, “Look Kitty, Cody’s been moping around sulking since we arrived over here. We all know he misses you and he hasn’t been happy. In fact he’s been a downright miserable bastard and a pain in the ass. Anyhow, tonight we had a few hours to kill before the bus left at midnight, so we encouraged him to come out with us earlier this evening. Whenever we’ve tried to take him out before he’s just refused and has stayed back at the hotel. But tonight we were surprised that he decided to come with us so we all headed out to a local rock bar we’ve been to before. But after we’d been there for about an hour he just disappeared, simply vanished into thin air. We figured he’d just gone back to the hotel to be a sulky bastard, but when we got back he wasn’t there. Then he didn’t show up for bus call at midnight, so we had to leave without him.”