by Lisa Childs
Now he narrowed his eyes with indignation and pride. “Are you saying that she’s difficult?”
“Of course not,” Penny said. She reached out, almost as if she couldn’t help herself, and touched his arm. She probably only meant to reassure him about his daughter. But then she added, “She’s sad. So sad...”
He shouldn’t have been able to feel Penny’s touch, not through his tuxedo jacket and shirt, but his skin tingled as if he’d felt the heat and silkiness of her skin against his. What the hell was wrong with him?
Maybe he’d been single too long. Like her, he’d lost his spouse. She had died, more than twenty years ago, when their girls were little. But he didn’t need closure—or anything else—but his daughters’ happiness. Ellen was older and settled with a good husband and three beautiful little girls.
But Megan...
He’d always worried the most about Megan and never more than when she got involved with Gage Huxton. She’d fallen so hard for him that it was inevitable she would get hurt.
“She’s marrying a good man,” Woodrow insisted. He wasn’t too proud to admit that he’d used Bureau resources to check out the kid. He was a computer nerd—as introverted and shy as she was. “They’re perfect for each other.”
They’d met in college, in a computer class. They’d been friends for years before they’d started dating. They hadn’t been going out very long before Gage had swept her off her feet.
Damn Gage...
Penny shook her head.
“They are perfect for each other,” he insisted.
“It doesn’t matter how compatible you are,” she said, “if you’re not in love.”
“Love is what made her miserable,” Woodrow said. He could relate to that. Love had made him miserable as well. “Compatibility is more important in a marriage—wanting and expecting the same things. That’s what will sustain a relationship.” And not send one outside the marriage looking for something else.
“Are you speaking from experience now?” she asked.
He wished. He shook his head. “We’re not talking about me.”
“No,” she agreed. “Megan, and her happiness, is our only priority. You need to tell her that Gage is alive.”
“Why?” he asked.
Nothing good would come of her knowing the truth; it wouldn’t change anything. She and Gage had broken up nearly a year ago—before he’d quit the Bureau, before he’d reenlisted, before he’d gone missing in action.
Penny’s grasp on his arm tightened. Her hand was small but strong. He felt her grip and the heat of her touch. “She deserves to know before she marries another man that the man she really loves is alive.”
He hadn’t seen Gage yet. But Woodrow’s former agent and Gage’s best friend, Nicholas Rus, had warned him. Gage had come back alive, but he hadn’t come back the same.
Woodrow shook his head. “No, the man she loves is gone.” And maybe it was better that she never learned the truth.
* * *
Megan Lynch stared into the oval mirror, studying the woman reflected back at her. Wasn’t she supposed to look beautiful? Weren’t all brides?
The gown, while not her style, was certainly eye-catching. With twinkling rhinestones sewn onto the heavy brocade, it sparkled. The lacy veil was beautiful and softened the sharp angles of Megan’s face and hid some of the severity of the dark hair she’d pulled into a tight knot to tame. But she didn’t look beautiful. She shouldn’t have expected that she would; she had never looked beautiful before. Why should her wedding day be any different?
No matter how much makeup the beautician had applied, the dark circles were still visible beneath her dark eyes. Tears brimmed in them, but she blinked them away. She wouldn’t feel sorry for herself anymore. She had done enough of that the past several months. She’d nearly drowned in self-pity and guilt.
The knob rattled as someone turned it and began to open the door to the bride’s dressing room. She hurriedly tugged the veil over her face to hide the hint of tears she couldn’t quite clear from her eyes. They kept rushing back—every time she thought of him.
She had to stop thinking about him. He was gone. But even if he wasn’t, he wouldn’t have ever come back to her, not after what she’d done. She had to stop thinking about the past and focus on the future, not that she deserved one.
Because he didn’t have one...
Marrying Richard was the right thing to do. He’d always been there for her. Even after she’d broken up with him, Richard had remained her friend. And when her heart had been broken, he’d tried to piece it back together. Eventually, he had even accepted that there was no patching a heart as shattered as hers. He’d insisted that their friendship was a stronger and safer foundation for a marriage than love.
Safe had sounded good to her. And there was no one safer than Richard. He was quiet and shy and nervous and cautious. He wouldn’t put himself or her in any danger for any reason. He would always be there for her—like he’d always been.
Not like Gage...
The door opened fully, but she didn’t turn toward it. She suspected it was her matron of honor, who was supposed to have arrived with the beautician an hour earlier. Her sister, Ellen, was always late. She also had three little girls she’d needed to get ready besides herself, though.
Megan’s heart swelled with love for her nieces. They and the kids she worked with every day made her yearn to have children of her own. She wanted to be a mom like her sister—loving and fun.
She didn’t remember her own mom. Dad had been both a father and mother to her.
Since whoever had entered was quiet—it couldn’t be her sister and nieces. It had to be her dad.
“So what do you think?” Megan asked as she focused on the mirror again. The lace distorted her vision, so she nearly saw it: the beauty of being a bride.
But then a shadow stepped behind her. It was tall and dark in a black tuxedo. The mirror showed only his long legs and his chest. He was too thin to be her father. Too tall to be Richard. She had no idea who he was until he stepped closer yet. Then she saw his head—the short golden hair, the bright green eyes, the darker blond stubble on his jaw...
Just how badly had the veil distorted her vision? Who was she mistaking for a dead man?
Her hands trembling, she fumbled with her veil, pulling it back so she could focus on the apparition. She whirled around to face him.
It couldn’t be...
Gage was dead. He had died months ago, his body lost in some foreign country. But that hadn’t stopped her from seeing him everywhere, every time she’d closed her eyes and tried to sleep.
She shouldn’t be seeing him here—not on her wedding day to another man.
“No...” she murmured. Her knees trembled and weakened, threatening to fold beneath her. “No...”
Chapter 2
“So what do I think?” Gage repeated her question. He thought he’d been punched in the gut. The minute he’d opened the door and seen her—sparkling like a vision in white—all his breath had left his lungs. His chest burned, his ribs ached. He felt like he was getting the life pounded out of him all over again.
Her usually honey-toned skin was pale except for the dark circles beneath her enormous eyes. With her sharp cheekbones, small pointed chin and wide dark eyes, she appeared fragile—vulnerable. He knew she was tougher than she looked, though. She’d been tough on him when she’d broken up with him. Then she swayed on her feet, as if she were about to faint.
Instinctively, he reached out to catch her, closing his hands around her waist. She was thinner than she’d been when he’d seen her last. Maybe she was one of those brides who’d been starving herself to fit into her gown, to look good for her wedding photos and her groom. Maybe that was why she trembled in his grasp.
From starvation...
He preferred the sexy curves she’d had over her new svelte figure. She’d been perfect as she was.
Her breath escaped in a gasp. “You’re real...” s
he murmured. “You’re alive...”
As he realized what she’d thought, he chuckled. “You’re not seeing a ghost.”
“I thought—everyone thought—that you died in Afghanistan.”
“I was presumed dead,” he said, “but I was just missing.” Missing everyone back home, but most especially her. She had obviously not been missing him at all, though. She’d been dating, getting engaged.
Anger coursed through him, making him shake like she was. His hands tightened around her tiny waist. “So what do I think,” he mused again. “I think you make a beautiful bride, Megan Lynch.”
He had once planned on asking her to be his; he’d even bought the ring. But he had never gotten the chance to give it to her before she’d broken up with him, before she’d broken him.
She flinched as if he’d insulted her. But she’d never been able to accept a compliment as anything but a lie. She’d actually accused him of lying to her, of using her.
His blood heated. This was why he couldn’t protect her—because he wanted to hurt her—like she had hurt him, like her marrying another man was hurting him all over again. “So let me be the first to kiss the bride...”
He gripped her small waist and dragged her up so her feet dangled above the floor. She gasped in shock, her breath whispering across his lips as he lowered his mouth to hers. Her lips were as soft as he remembered, her taste as sweet. He had missed this so much. He’d missed her. He deepened the kiss. Pressing his lips tightly against hers, he slid his tongue into her mouth.
A moan rumbled in her throat. And her hands clasped the back of his head, her fingers sliding over his short hair. She stilled as she touched one of the scars. Those wounds hadn’t hurt, though, at least not in comparison to what she’d done to him.
Remembering the pain she’d caused him, he dragged his mouth from hers. Then he lowered her until her feet touched the floor again. When he released her, she swayed and her palm pressed against his chest. His heart leaped beneath her touch, and she must have felt it because she jerked her hand away.
“Gage,” she murmured, and she stared up at him as if she still couldn’t believe he wasn’t an apparition. Then her gaze scanned him, over the tuxedo he was wearing, the damn bow tie choking off his breath.
“Why are you here?” She looked both fearful and hopeful, and he realized what she thought.
A chuckle of bitterness slipped through his lips. “Don’t worry,” he assured her, “I’m not here to stop the wedding.”
“Then why are you here?” she asked.
“I work for a security firm now,” he said. “The Payne Protection Agency. Penny hired me to make sure nothing stops this wedding from happening.” Actually, he suspected just the opposite—that she had imagined some romantic reunion between him and Megan. Since she was a wedding planner, she probably believed in romance and happy endings and all that stuff Gage had given up on nearly a year ago.
There would be no happy ending for him.
* * *
Like she had so many times before, Penny tugged the dress over Nikki’s head and zipped her into it. “Thank you, honey, for helping me out.”
Nikki grimaced. Like she had a choice...
Like anyone could say no to Penny Payne. Even Gage Huxton hadn’t been able to, and he could have come up with more excuses than Nikki had.
Her small hands gripping Nikki’s shoulders, Penny spun her around to face her. “You look beautiful.”
After having three boys, Penny must have been very happy to finally have a girl so she could dress her up like a doll. But having three brothers, Nikki hadn’t wanted anything to do with dresses or dolls. She’d wanted to play the sports her brothers had played. She’d wanted to wrestle and fight. She couldn’t do that in the dresses Mom had constantly tried to zip her into then—or now.
“Mom...”
Penny’s palm cupped her cheek. “I know you don’t want to be, but you are beautiful.”
Her face flushed, but she couldn’t deny that she was beautiful—not without insulting her mother. She looked exactly like Penny.
“I want to be taken seriously,” she said. And that was hard when she looked like the doll her mother treated her like she was. She was petite and delicate looking with big heavily lashed eyes. And now her mother had zipped her into a blue satin dress so she looked like a curly auburn–haired Barbie doll.
“I want you to be happy,” Penny said.
“I am,” Nikki insisted.
But her mother just gave her a pitying smile. Penny didn’t think it was possible for Nikki to be happy unless she was all in love like her brothers were. Her brothers had been lucky to find their perfect mates. Nikki didn’t think there was anyone out there who would be perfect for her.
She’d once thought another man had been perfect—her father. Of course she only had a child’s memories of him, since he’d died when she was nine, so she’d idealized him. When she’d learned that he had cheated on her mother, Nikki had been more upset than Penny had been. Her mother had been able to forgive him. Nikki couldn’t.
Nor could she trust any other man.
“Well,” Nikki amended her statement, “I’m not happy to be here.”
“I appreciate your helping out,” Penny said.
“What happened?” Nikki asked. “Why did a bridesmaid get tossed out of the wedding party? Did she sleep with the groom?” And the stupid bride had forgiven him but disowned her friend?
Penny shook her head. “The matron of honor. She’s sick. Either food poisoning or...”
“Or? Regular poisoning?”
Penny laughed. “You’re hopeless. You’d rather think of the worst than the obvious.”
To Nikki, the worst was the most obvious. “What is the obvious?”
“She’s pregnant.”
Nikki groaned. Fortunately, she wasn’t as fertile as the women she knew, like her sisters-in-law and apparently the sick matron of honor. Of course she’d have to actually be involved with someone to have the possibility of becoming pregnant. And she wasn’t going to risk that again. She’d had boyfriends, even a fun fling or two. But despite what her mother thought, she didn’t need a husband or a family.
“And no one else could fill in for the sick matron of honor?” Nikki asked.
Penny shrugged. “I didn’t bother to find out.”
That wasn’t like the wedding planner who always went the extra mile to make sure the bride’s special day was extra special.
But then Penny always enlisted Nikki before any of her other kids to help out at the chapel. She’d probably expected her only daughter to go into the wedding planning business with her instead of into the bodyguard business with her brothers. Even before she’d learned of her father’s betrayal, Nikki had never had any interest in weddings.
“Is there any particular reason you want me to step in as maid of honor?”
“It’s because of the bride,” Penny said. “She’s Woodrow Lynch’s daughter.”
Woodrow? The first name basis caught Nikki by surprise. “Do you mean Chief Special Agent Lynch? Nick’s old boss?” Her half brother had been an FBI agent before he’d recently quit to join the Payne Protection Agency.
Her mother’s face flushed slightly, and she nodded.
How did that make this bride special? And she obviously was to Penny. Nikki had never seen her mother so worried about a wedding, not even the one she’d planned as a ruse to flush out a sadistic serial killer.
“Do you think she’s in danger?” Nikki asked. Had her mother enlisted her not as a dress-up doll to play wedding party but as a bodyguard?
Penny’s teeth nipped her bottom lip, and she nodded. “I have a feeling...”
Nikki’s blood tingled with excitement and nerves. Her mother’s feelings were legendary, because they were rarely wrong. If Penny Payne thought the bride was in danger, then Ms. Lynch was definitely in danger.
* * *
Megan was scared. Even though she lived a relatively boring lif
e as a school librarian, she knew fear well. She had been very frightened when she’d broken up with Gage. She’d had a horrible feeling then that she was making a mistake. And when he’d reenlisted and been immediately deployed...
She’d been scared out of her mind that something would happen to him. Even worse, he’d gone missing and had been presumed dead...
She had nearly lost her mind. She wasn’t that scared now, because she knew what she had to do. She was going to thwart Gage’s assignment. There was no way she was going through with this wedding.
Minutes ticked away on the clock hanging on the yellow wall of the bride’s dressing room. She was still alone inside—although she didn’t feel alone anymore. While Gage had been gone for long moments, his presence was palpable in the room, which was another reason she needed to leave it. She needed to find the groom’s dressing room and tell him that she couldn’t do this. She couldn’t marry him.
She shouldn’t have accepted Richard’s proposal in the first place. While he was okay that she wasn’t in love with him, she wasn’t. As he had convinced her, it was safer to marry someone you didn’t love. There was no chance of getting your heart broken. But then there was no chance of passion, either. She’d had that passion with Gage.
While she’d had boyfriends before—Richard and a couple of high school boys before him—she’d never felt the passion she had with Gage. Only with Gage...
The first moment she’d met him—during a Super Bowl party at her father’s house—she’d been overwhelmed by attraction.
He was tall, with broad shoulders and heavily developed muscles. He had looked like a gym rat—then. But not now...
While he’d looked good—damn good—in the black tuxedo, he’d also looked thinner than Megan had ever seen him. What had he endured throughout those long months he’d been missing?
She wanted to know. Most of all she wanted him every bit as much as she’d wanted him that day they’d first met. When she’d closed the refrigerator door to find him leaning against the side of it, she’d thought he was big then, towering over her.