by King, Imani
“No, certainly not. You can keep your nice little ideal view of John. He’s been active in politics for years through his business, and he’s an excellent candidate... if you like his views that is. He truly believes he’s doing this for the American people. Knocking the evil candidate off the throne.” She tapped her cigarette at the window, the ash trailing behind us.
“But why... why would he keep this hidden?”
“What? The marriage? Well, he’s embarrassed, I suppose. His supporters wouldn’t necessarily love to know that we were married when we were in college.”
“Is this about money?”
“Oh no, not at all. I have plenty of that.” My heart sank, and I looked over at the woman. Money would have been less complicated than whatever she had planned. I leaned my head into my hand and sighed heavily, an unearthly exhaustion creeping through each cell of my body. I couldn’t imagine John as the type of man who would hide this, but it appeared there was a lot I didn’t know about him.
“Why are you doing this? Why can’t you just let it play out?” Tears pricked at my eyes, and I swallowed them hard, trying to push them down.
“Oh honey, you don’t know a thing about politics, do you? I want to win. And I need to hit John with something that will destroy his confidence. I need to show him that I know he’s human, and oh so easily defeated. But you know, there’s one option we haven’t explored. You. I know he needs you and that woman, Kelly. If you leave his campaign and join mine, I’ll leave him be... for right now.” A tear rolled down my cheek, and I wiped it away, mascara coming away on my hand.
“I will leave the campaign, but there’s no way in hell that I’d work for you,” I spat. The Rolls pulled up to the curb in front of my apartment complex. I looked out at the rows of condos and studio apartments. It all seemed so quiet and calm, reflecting none of the pain that I felt. The life I’d led a few weeks ago seemed so pure, so sweet. I closed my eyes for a moment and imagined going back in time, skipping the day that I’d met John, the day that I’d made the worst mistake of my life.
“Think about it, my dear. Everything has been set in motion, and John will know about the scandal before long. And it’s always the woman who gets sacrificed, no matter how many good intentions the man in power has. Mark my words. If you want a place in politics, you’ll call me up in a few hours and accept my proposal. Otherwise, I can guarantee you’ll be out of politics for good, and more than certainly out of John’s horrible little campaign. I will win. And I’m giving you an opportunity to get out now. To keep your career in politics. Unless, of course, you want to go back to work at that horrible little job at the nonprofit. You’ll probably never even get the directorship there after this. Might as well sign back on as program director or whatever the hell it was you were doing.” I cut my eyes at her. I pulled at the door handle, but the Rolls was locked from the front. Janice stubbed out her cigarette, her eyes studying mine.
“Never.” Janice laughed, throwing her head back.
“You think John will keep you on? You think you’ll be able to do anything in this town after this? If you do, you’re dumber than I thought. No one likes the whore. You’ll be lucky if you can even show your face at The Washington Foundation.”
“Let me out,” I said, pulling at the handle again. I closed my eyes and saw a brief flash of waking up in the morning and going in to work for Janice. I shuddered and pulled at the handle again. “Driver, please open this door, or I’ll be calling the police.” Janice nodded, and the door opened. She tossed one of her cards out after me, and I left it sitting on the pavement. She sniffed and laughed again.
“Have it your way. I was hoping you would come and work for me. I do like helping a woman get ahead. But I’m looking so forward to seeing John’s face when the news comes out. It’ll make this election a hell of a lot more exciting.” I turned on my heels, hiding my face from her view. “Call me by noon if you change your mind!” she shouted after me. I stomped up to the gate and swiped my keycard, slamming the gate behind me. After a moment, I heard the door of the Rolls close, and it drove away. I trembled and looked back to where her card had landed on the sidewalk.
“No,” I mumbled, “ You’re better than this. And something will work out. Something.”
I ran into my apartment, my stomach rolling. I’d never felt so nauseated, so dizzy in my life. I stumbled into the bathroom, kicking off my shoes and flew to the toilet, dry heaving over and over again.
“He’s ruined,” I moaned. I knew that I had to get to John as soon as possible, but I knew he was traveling again this morning. Perfect timing. I heaved, saved by the fact that there wasn’t a damn thing in my stomach. I leaned back and sat on the floor, hot tears prickling at my eyes. I started to sob in earnest, and I crawled over to the cabinet beneath my bathroom sink. Even if I couldn’t figure out quite what I was going to do about John, I could at least get some Pepto or Alka Seltzer. And then maybe my day would start looking up. I opened the cabinet, sorting through the packets of pills I kept on hand for colds. I reached my hand to the back of the cabinet, my hand hitting against a plastic bag from the pharmacy. I pulled it out, paper crinkling. Even before I pulled it into the light, an image of it was forming in my mind. I pulled a slim, unopened package out of the bag.
Plan B One-Step Contraceptive.
The morning after pill. I’d never taken it. I dropped the packet to the floor and clasped my hands over my stomach again, crawling back to the toilet and heaving hard.
CHAPTER EIGHT
I closed my eyes, the bathroom spinning around me, trying to count the days since my last cycle. It had been about two weeks before I first met John. I tapped my fingers on the toilet bowl, taking note of the days and weeks I’d been working on the campaign. It had been about three and a half weeks since I started.
Holy shit. I laid down across the cool tile of my bathroom floor, the flouncing autumnal dress swirling around me. If I were a slimmer, prettier girl, the whole thing might have looked very romantic. But I was sure that I had dark bags under my eyes. And the gray, sickly skin tone I had been sporting probably wasn’t doing me any favors. It all had an explanation though.
Pregnant. My stomach protested at the thought of it, but I was too tired to draw myself back up to lean over the toilet. Instead, I pressed my forehead to the floor, listening to my pulse pounding in my ears. I knew there was a pregnancy test hiding somewhere in my cabinet, but it was probably two years old at least. Would a two-year old test even work? I had no idea. After all, I wasn’t the kind of girl who did things like this. I was good. I was demure. I stuck to the rules when it came to men.
But John had roared into my life, forcing me to break all of them. I thought of his arms wrapped around me, providing me with the strength and wholeness that I’d been missing my entire adult life. Funny how that is. I had never known it was missing, not until I had it for one moment. I pulled myself over to the bathroom cabinet and opened the bottom drawer, fumbling around without looking until my fingers touched the package I needed. Clutching the pregnancy test, I hoisted myself onto the commode. I ripped the package open, my hands shaking. Closing my eyes hard, I took the test. Still not looking, I put it onto the counter beside me.
Janice Howell. She can’t know. She just can’t. She’s already got enough to ruin John, and this will seal the deal. She’ll be in the Senate until the end of time after this, and she’ll be up at bat for the presidency after this.
“Why didn’t you tell me she was your ex-wife?” I sunk my head into my hands, completely defeated. Even if I wasn’t pregnant, she had everything she needed to ruin us. She’d been waiting for this, waiting for John to slip up. And it was all focused on me. I let out a sob. I’d put my entire career on the line to work for John, and now I’d ruined him.
I reached over and pulled the test into my lap. Slowly, I opened my eyes and looked down. Outlined against the burnt orange and deep red of my skirt was another pattern that sealed my fate.
Two
pink lines, perfectly parallel and absolutely unmistakable.
“Ohhhh no,” I moaned. “No, no no no no.”
I’d never imagined being a mother, never considered the impact of a positive pregnancy test. But if I had… if I’d thought about my own mother, or my sister, or my best friends… I wouldn’t have thought it would feel so lonely.
“Maybe it’s not so lonely if you have someone to share it with. If it’s wanted.” I sniffed hard and took the pregnancy test in my hands, looking at the two little lines. I groaned and threw the thing on the counter, hoisting myself up and throwing my dress to the ground. I stomped back to my bedroom and threw on a nightshirt, falling into bed. If there was one thing I needed, it was sleep. Kelly and I could deal with Janice Howell tomorrow… and then… and then what?
Just as I started to drift off to sleep, I heard a car pull around to the front of my building. At this time of day, it could only be my elderly neighbors returning from the farmer’s market... or Kelly Hernandez, hot on the tail of some campaign management strategy that just couldn’t wait. I groaned and buried my face in the comforter. The knocker clicked, and I groaned again.
“Maybe I can wait and tell her everything later. After... after... the pregnancy is all taken care of.” Taken care of? I gulped back a sob and pulled the cover over my head. This wasn’t the kind of thing I did. I didn’t carelessly get pregnant... or carelessly think about terminating a pregnancy. The knock came again, this time louder.
“Go away, Kelly!” I shouted. “I need to sleep!”
“Didn’t you already get plenty of rest, darling? You left the fundraiser so early, I barely even saw you.” I closed my eyes and thought of John’s hands on my body, his taste in my mouth.
“I just didn’t sleep well!” I shouted again. “Go! Away!”
“You know I have a key darling, but I will respect your privacy. But it’s absolutely essential that I speak to you now. Dear Gregory has been keeping things from us. You know, Janice Howell is his ex-wife.” My ears perked up. If Kelly knew that much, then... “And she thinks he’s embroiled in some sort of scandal.” I crawled out of bed and made my way over to the door, unlocking it and swinging it wide open.
“Come the hell in,” I said, gesturing to my classy white couch.
“You look like hell, sweetheart. What on earth happened to you?”
“Plenty. Kelly, look, there’s probably something we need to talk about--“
“I’ll put on a pot of coffee for you, my dear. You need to be caffeinated. And so do I. I’m afraid we have a terribly tough time ahead. Now this woman, she’s awful.” Kelly’s high heels clicked across the floor and into my kitchen. She deftly cleaned out my french press and started to work grinding the beans I’d gotten from Zeke’s the week before. The rich scent filled the air, and for once, I was grateful for Kelly’s complete disregard for privacy. I sank into the sofa and closed my eyes.
“I know,” I said.
“How do you know? You’ve never met the monster in person, have you? Anyway, Janice says that our dear Gregory has been up to absolutely no good. He’s been gallivanting with some very young woman on his campaign team. She says she has email, photos, the whole lot.”
I groaned and pulled my fingers through my hair.
“Kelly, I—”
“It all sounds terribly romantic, like he can’t keep his hands off of this young lady. But you know, I don’t believe a bit of it. Sounds totally orchestrated. Like a complete fabrication, created by a jealous ex-wife who needs money for her dying campaign. We’re rocking it in the polls, my love, but first we need to figure out what she’s got.”
“Kelly, seriously—”
“But someone on the campaign? My, heavens no. All of our girls are far too professional for such a thing. Even us, old hags that we are.” Kelly swooped by and sat a steaming cup of coffee onto the side table. “Let me go to the bathroom, darling, and we’ll figure out what’s next for Mr. John Gregory Reynolds. Dear John. I can see it now. That’s what all the tabloids will call him. Ha!”
“Kelly! No! It’s... It’s a mess!” I leapt to my feet and followed her to the bathroom, trying to block her from going in.
“Yes, darling, it looks like a tornado hit. Why on earth is that gorgeous dress still on the floor? You simply must have it laundered before you return it to me. I mean it would be particularly nice for the inaugural balls,” she said, stooping to pick it up off the floor. Pushing into the bathroom behind her, I grabbed the pregnancy test, accidentally kicking Kelly’s foot. She whipped around, the dress already draped over her shoulder and caught me by the wrist, fast as lightning. “Darling, what are you hiding from me?” I tried to pull my arm away, my palm blocking the two pink lines.
“Nothing, nothing. I can take care of it by myself.” My voice cracked, my face flushing deep red.
“What can you take care of yourself?” Kelly pried open my fingers one by one. Her eyes flashed up to mine, searching my face. She took the test from my hand, and I gulped hard.
“It’s not what it looks like.”
“Well, darling,” she said, her voice gentle, “It looks like a positive pregnancy test. Are you telling me that it’s not a positive pregnancy test?” I nodded and then shook my head in confusion, tears pricking at my eyes.
“It is... but it’s not...”
“It’s not yours? Darling, no one else lives here. And these days, correct me if I’m wrong, the only people you see are me and...” Kelly’s phone buzzed and she put the pregnancy test back on the counter. Slowly, she raised her phone and looked at the screen. “Janice Howell has sent me yet another email. This one with a picture of the alleged woman that John has been seeing. Tell me I’m not going to see someone I know when I open this screen,” she said, gripping my wrist tight. I fell against the wall, crying hard. Kelly swiped open the screen and turned the picture to me. It was my face, my hair, the dress I’d worn the night before. As plain as day.
“I’m so sorry, Kelly. I’m so, so sorry.” She took a deep breath, stuffing her phone in the pocket of her tight ponte pants. She lifted her hands to my shoulders and pulled me into an embrace, hugging me hard. “I fucked it all up, Kelly. It’s all rotten now, the whole damn thing.”
“Shush darling,” she said, her own voice cracking, “In Argentina, everyone is having affairs with everyone else. This country is just a bit behind the times.”
“No, Kelly, it’s all ruined. She’ll drag us through the mud, and we’ll never win. And she’s after his money, after all the people who we’ve worked so hard to gain...” She stroked my hair, shushing me again.
“Well, we’ll just have to beat her at her own game. And while we’re at it, we’re going to make our dear Senator Hopeful do exactly what he needs to do for everything to be okay.”
“Wha—what do you mean?”
“He made the decision to put you in a bad situation, darling. And honestly I’ve never liked him less,” she said, pulling away. “But he’s the best man for the job, and we’ll make sure he wins. We just have to cover our bases before election day.”
“What do you mean? Janice threatened me, said you’d all leave me in the dirt.” I sniffed again. She handed me a tissue, and I blew my nose hard.
“Well my dear, that’s quite far from the truth. That woman wouldn’t know what a true friend was if it came and smacked her in the face. Nor would she know what a real, honorable man was.”
“An honorable man? Kelly what are you talking about?”
“Well my dear. Congratulations are in order. You’re about to be married.”
CHAPTER NINE
October 2, 2016
Five Weeks until Election Day
The next morning, Kelly picked me up bright and early to make a trip to Reynolds’ office. He was still staying at the Four Seasons, but we both thought it best if I didn’t go back there again. John knew all about Janice, and he had removed the cameras from his hotel room. Still, I couldn’t be too careful. I couldn’t go b
ack there. By the time Kelly and I arrived at the campaign office in Alexandria, my body had gone rigid with fear. The bagel and decaf coffee Kelly insisted on buying for me weren’t sitting well in my stomach.