by Emme Rollins, Julia Kent, Anna Antonia, Helena Newbury, Aubrey Rose
Gabriel definitely dangled me from his elegant fingers. I had a feeling he was waiting for me to pass a test he designed, except I didn’t have a study guide. All I had was the hope that his patience with my inability to solve the presented problem wouldn’t end.
Now with empty bellies, we walked through the glass doors and dodged the steady foot traffic. The limo gleamed ebony dark as it idled by the curb.
“No Escalade today?”
“Nope. I’ll save that for later.”
Waylon greeted us both warmly as he held open the door. Gabriel climbed in after me. He held me in his arms, guiding my head to rest against his chest. His cologne had quickly become my favorite scent in the whole world.
“How’s your day been, Ms. Adams?”
“Busy. Yours, Mr. Gordon?”
“Busy. Much better now that I’m with you.”
“Me too.”
“I missed you, Emma. Have you missed me?”
Closing my eyes, I let myself have the luxury of truth. “Yes. It’s hard to think about anything else when all I can think about is you.”
“I’m sorry that we didn’t get to spend the whole day together yesterday.”
“It’s okay. Really.”
Our Sunday trip to the zoo was a first for us both. Gabriel called ahead by about an hour, telling me he would be by my place around 11:00am. Apparently, he didn’t know about the sleeping-in-late-on-Sunday rule.
Gabriel brought me breakfast again just as I finished getting dressed. Seeing him on my doorstep with aviator glasses, a long sleeved white shirt, jeans, and boots, brought back all the desire I thought I’d exorcised the night before in bed.
“Hello,” I greeted him, breathless and suddenly shy.
“Hello, Emma.”
While eating a light meal of pancakes and fruit, I’d asked, “I thought you were busy today.”
“Hmm?”
“You know—the thing with your mom.”
“No. I cancelled.”
“Really? Why?”
Gabriel’s sultry stare answered him far better than “I had the insatiable urge to look at monkeys with you.”
He drove us down after breakfast, easily finding a parking spot. Gabriel opened my door, like he’d done every single time the day before, and we approached the ticket booth hand in hand.
I loved it. I loved being able to be with Gabriel in public, without having to worry about others staring and judging us. I loved our anonymity.
We made our way through the zoo. Walking slowly, stopping to see every exhibit, Gabriel and I weren’t the billionaire and the girl. We were just two people who liked the cheetahs, loved the polar bears, and thought the alligators were just waiting for us to turn our backs.
He’d asked if I could see forever. I could see it, taste it, and longed for it.
Spontaneously breaking out in smile, I wondered if life could really be this easy. Could you find love again just like that? Was I really this lucky?
Gabriel’s phone rang as we approached the last exhibit. He stepped away, apologetic and with a firm promise he’d only be a minute. Standing by the fox exhibit, I watched him from the corner of my eye. The easy smile I so adored had disappeared, leaving his mouth tight with tension.
Whoever was on the other side had made Gabriel furious. It could’ve been anything. Gabriel looked over his shoulder and saw me watching. He ended the call immediately.
It could be anything so why do I suddenly feel cold?
When he came back to me I didn’t ask him why he’d been so angry. I didn’t mention anything at all, but our sweet outing had inadvertently soured.
“I’m sorry, Emma. Something’s come up and I have to go. I’ll be back by tonight.”
“Are you okay?”
“I will be when I get back to you. I’ll call you, okay?”
Gabriel hadn’t shown up until the wee hours of the morning. I lay awake nearly as long. I’d listened for every motor and expected every flash of headlight to be his. I worried, sensing in my gut that something very wrong had happened.
A few short hours later I’d startled awake. My alarm rudely announced shower time. By the time I was dressed in a smart black suit, hair pulled back in a chignon, I’d shoved Gabriel aside as much as I could.
I couldn’t expect him to be by my side 24/7. I had to trust he hadn’t been able to come back for a good reason.
You have to get over your insecurities about him some day. Today might as well be the day.
I opened the door to see Gabriel leaning against the wall. “Baby, I’m so sorry. I just got back a few minutes ago.” He’d brought me flowers, apologetic and tired.
I loved hearing the pet name on his lips. “Have you slept at all?”
A faint smile curled his lips. “No.”
“You didn’t have to come back here, Gabriel. You could’ve gone straight to work and just called me later.”
“I didn’t want to.” Gabriel tugged me into his arms. His whole body shuddered and melted against mine. “I wanted to see you.”
I hugged him back. Exhaustion hit me now that I knew he was okay. I shrugged it off and concentrated on just being with him.
“I’m sorry, Emma. Really I am. I had business to take care of but I’d much rather have been here with you. Here, I brought you these.”
I pulled away from him to accept the flowers, relieved to hear his words. “I guess it’s not always a glamorous life to be so rich. Money and business don’t always respect normal business hours, do they?”
He didn’t say anything, but I saw the nervousness hiding behind his pleasant exterior.
I immediately felt guilty. Did he think me so unforgiving that I’d hold his work against him or be angry because plans change?
I’m not that kind of girl. I’ll show you.
I reached out for Gabriel again and kissed him on the cheek. “I’m so glad you made time for me this morning, Gabriel.”
“Always.” He kissed my forehead, lingering longer than usual. “We better go. Don’t want to be late, do we?”
Although we drove separately to work, Gabriel met me by the elevators. “Don’t forget we have a lunch date today.”
“I won’t.”
Gabriel gestured to the bouquet of lilies in my arms. “Think of me.”
“Always.”
I carried his delighted smile with me all the way to my cube.
Now ensconced in his luxury vehicle, wrapped up tightly in his arms, I wondered how I’d managed to forget Gabriel long enough to be of some service to Med-Tech. Juggling a boyfriend and a career would definitely be a challenge—one I’d never had to do. I eagerly looked forward to the experience.
Waylon dropped us off at a deli serving 3” thick sandwiches. I knew I’d probably only be able to eat half, but I looked forward to trying. Gabriel placed our order and then escorted us to the back of the cramped space to wait on our food.
Gabriel enfolded my hands in his. “I want to talk to you about tonight, Emma.”
“What is it?”
“I won’t be home.”
“You mean the apartment?”
“Yes.”
“Oh, that’s okay.”
Gabriel opened his mouth before closing it. “Actually, it’s not.”
“Why?” I finally noticed the brackets lining his mouth. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine. I will be fine that is. I just have to take care of a couple of things before I can fully move next to door to you.”
Inwardly I struggled to make the proper words come out, but I forced them out anyways. I’d already gotten used to the idea of having Gabriel so close. Still, it wasn’t about what I wanted. It was about what was best for him.
“Look, Gabriel, you don’t have to if it’s easier for you to stay where you are—”
“No! I’m not staying there.”
His vehemence begged me to ask, “Why do you hate it so much?”
Gabriel inhaled and exhaled several beats. “I ha
te what it represents in my life.”
“Which is?”
“A time when I was willing to settle.”
“Gabriel, I’m sorry but I don’t understand.”
He lifted my hands up to his mouth and kissed the knuckles. “I don’t mean to be vague. I just don’t like talking about that time when I’m with you.”
“You probably will need to one day. I mean, seeing how much it’s affecting you now.”
“You’re right. I will explain one day…really soon…but not right now. I just want to focus on us, on my future with you.”
I cleared my throat. “Does this have to do with Embry?”
A server brought our food before he could answer, forcing us to break our contact. I couldn’t help but fear the symbolism.
“No and yes. I’ll explain everything soon, Emma. Let me manage the loose ends and then I’ll tell you everything.”
Gabriel didn’t seem enthusiastic about the telling. It must’ve been pretty bad.
I thought about the night before. The question of “Was it business last night or was it personal” bore down on my tongue. I swallowed it, afraid that I was seeing things that didn’t exist, much like I had seven years before.
I didn’t want to run from him this time. Not based on assumptions, fear, and insecurity.
So I ignored the fear making itself comfortable in my stomach. I smiled and ate my delicious lunch, made all the more tasty because of the pensive angel at my side.
Gabriel is crazy for me and I’m crazy for him. It’s going to be okay.
“Is your food good?”
“Yes.” I managed a sunny smile for him. “I’ve never been here so I’m so glad you took me.”
Gabriel leaned forward and kissed my cheek. “Just a few more days, Emma, and then I’m all yours.”
“I’ll hold you to that, Sir.”
“My God, Emma. What you do to me! I promise I’ll show you soon in explicit detail.”
If only all promises were just as sweet as Gabriel.
Chapter Eight
“Hello? Gabriel? Where are you?”
It was 8:32pm, almost eight hours since I saw him at lunch. I’d just spent the better part of the last five minutes making my way up the colossal structure of granite and glass just to see Gabriel. The entire building reeked of privilege and exclusivity. I felt seriously underdressed in my yoga pants, jacket, and flip flops.
Thankfully the front desk (Concierge? Security? I’m not sure what it’d be called) let me up without any issues. All I had to do was show my ID. Apparently Gabriel had left my name as an approved visitor.
The elevator wasn’t as fast as the one’s in Gabriel’s building but it was fast enough. Alone in the bullet box I wondered what was so important that he needed me to come over.
Maybe he needs moral support?
The door had been left unlocked as promised. I entered the silent space, surprised that Gabriel wasn’t there to greet me. I scanned the immaculate interior, looking for any sign of him. Sleek lines of luxury furniture and tasteful décor greeted me from the low-lit living room. Although drawn to the bank of floor to ceiling windows and the enormous outdoor patio beyond, I slowly made my way deeper into the darkened interior.
“Gabriel? Are you here?”
A gallery of pictures hung in the long hallway. Several empty spots broke the perfect arrangement, making me wonder what happened to them. I had a sinking suspicion I already knew.
“Gabriel? Hello?”
He rushed out of a room further down the hall, dressed only in low slung pajama pants and carrying a bottle. “Emma? Is that you?”
I smiled, happy to see him again. “Gabriel, I came as fast as I could. What’s up?”
He rushed down the hall towards me. My welcoming smile faded when he hissed, “Emma, why are you here? How did you get here without me knowing?”
Gabriel’s blistering anger shocked me. The man before me was nothing like the man I’d come to know over the past four days. “You texted me to come over.”
“I didn’t.”
I held up my phone to show him the text. “Yes, you did.”
Gabriel’s jaw clenched tight. I could see the muscles straining along his neck. “How did you get in?”
“You had me put on the list. At least, I think you did. The front desk…security…let me up. Are you okay?”
“No, how did you get inside here?”
“You left your door unlocked. Gabriel, what’s wrong?”
He opened his mouth and then closed it. “You can’t be here.”
“Wait…what the hell is going on? Why’d you ask me to come here if you don’t want me here?”
His hand closed around my arm. He roughly walked me back down the hall and into the living room. He then immediately backed away and pointed towards the door. “Emma, leave. I don’t know what’s happened, but you can’t be…be…be here.”
I recognized the signs from when we were teens. He swayed ever-so-slightly on his feet. His speech was too careful. I shook my head in disgust. “Gabriel, you’re drunk.”
“Yes. I am. Now that you’ve satisfied your curiosity—go. Please.”
“Why are you drinking? Are things really that bad?”
“Emma! Not now. Please.” He took a swig from the half-empty bottle. His neck bent, the weight of his head apparently too much to bear. “I don’t want you here. Not here. Not in this place. Not now. Go home before I forget why…”
I should’ve listened. I should’ve turned on my heel and walked straight out the door.
“You texted me for a reason. What was it?”
“Not me. Gabriel didn’t do it. Gabriel wouldn’t do it because Gabriel doesn’t want Emma here in this place. Not here where he wasn’t the man he needed to be for her. Not here…understand?”
I carefully circled him, my hand out ready to steady him. “I don’t want to leave you, Gabriel. Not when you’re like this.”
My kindness was wasted.
“That’s too bad, Emma. I don’t have the energy to pretend to be that which I’m not and to hide who I am. I’m a right bastard at the moment and I’m afraid I won’t be able to control it. I don’t want to hurt you. Never you. Never my sweet, sweet, perfect Emma. Now go before I stop being the one I want to be and turn into the one that is...is…”
Gabriel flung his head back. His throat worked, Adam’s apple bobbing madly.
I ached to hold him against my breast, to soothe the anger and grief away. “You wouldn’t hurt me.”
His head popped back up. The vicious sneer denied it. “Shows what you know. Then again, you don’t know much of anything. Not when I’m hiding left and right. Have to or you’ll run away. Why are you so good at running away, Emma? Have you had lots of practice with lots of people or just me? It’s me, isn’t it? I’m dirt beneath your feet. Only you, Emma, only you would see me like that. Maybe I’m the idiot after all. Stupid Gabriel Gordon…”
I refused to answer the belligerent end of his questions and instead focused on the beginning. “I never asked you to hide who you are.”
“Sure you have.”
“No, really I haven’t. I accept you as you are—”
“Oh, will you be quiet already? I don’t want to see you right now. I certainly don’t want to talk to you. I don’t want you here. How many times do I have to tell you? Now will you remove yourself from my sight and from my home? Please, Emma? I don’t want to say anything to make you sad or mad and I know the real me. He’ll do it. He’ll do it because he always hurts those that would love him. Gabriel is a fucking monster. He’s a sick bastard that doesn’t deserve you, but he’s such a bastard that he’ll do whatever it takes to keep you. You really don’t want to know him, Emma. You shouldn’t. So go. Please!”
“No.”
Gabriel stared me down, cold and ruthless. I imagined it was the stare he gave to his enemies. “No?”
“No.”
His eyes became chips of blue ice. “I’m not askin
g you anymore.”
“And I’m not leaving. Not yet.”
Anger pulsed, poisoning the air with his fury. “You’ll leave if I make you. It won’t be nice if I have to do it. Now go.”
“No.”
Gabriel threw the near-empty bottle away from me, against the opposite wall. “Why can’t you just do it? Why do you have to be so goddamned defiant? I don’t want you here, do you understand? I don’t want to look at you and I certainly don’t want to hear any of your fucking attitude, all right? Not now! Not when I’m like this!”
My eyes flooded with tears. Pain lanced me. I’d seen this kind of rage years before, but never directed at me.
“Oh, great. Now she cries. Thank you for the additional memories, Emma. It’s not like I had enough of my own, now you have to add yours. Well, come on through. Place all your crap in my head! It’s not like anything I want really matters!”
I blinked back my tears, drawing up the strength I’d counted on for years to keep me visually unaffected. “I don’t know who you are right now. Why are you being like this?”
“Because I’m not bloody perfect. That’s why!”
“I never wanted you to be perfect.”
I just wanted you to be mine.
“Oh, didn’t you?” Gabriel demanded with another sneer as he stalked my way. “Didn’t you?”
Although nervous, I refused to budge. I had to believe that he would never purposely hurt me. Not with his hands and definitely not with his words.
“I never meant to make you feel that way, Gabriel.”
“But you did, Emma. You did it every single fucking time you threw my money in my face. You did it every time I didn’t understand exactly where you were coming from. You did it when you walked away the first time. How do you think that made me feel? You were the only girl I ever allowed myself to—” Gabriel abruptly shut down.
The vicious words lashed me, making it impossible to draw more than a shaky breath. I didn’t know what to say to defend myself.
“I’m sorry, Gabriel. I was scared back then. I was afraid of losing myself in you…that you couldn’t see me. That I was just another in a long line of girls who’d made the mistake of loving you. I didn’t want that to be me. I couldn’t make that mistake.”