“Marie, you’re rambling,” T.J. softly reminded her.
Erika winced at his use of her other name. Another lie. It was all catching up. It was like a snowball. It was rolling faster and faster. She swallowed and took a deep breath trying to clear her head. She couldn’t tell him like this. She had to pull herself together.
“I don’t lie, Tim.”
“I believe you.”
“You do?” she questioned somewhat surprised.
“Yes, I do. I have sisters and if any one of them had accepted a ride from a total stranger ... I would have wanted them to make up a similar story. It isn’t safe ... you know that. It made me a little ... irritated, just because I knew that I was safe. I shouldn’t have questioned you to the extent that you had to lie. I guess I was just ... curious to see how far you would go.”
“Well ... that is quite some admission,” she said somewhat disconcerted. “Maybe its time for me to question you ... to see how far you would go.”
T.J. abruptly stood, wanting to end the now uncomfortable conversation. It wasn’t the time to bare his soul. It didn’t feel right anymore. Anyway, he wanted to enjoy one more night with Marie before the truth could tear them apart as he was somehow convinced it would.
“Listen, I want to get us some hot chocolate. Why don’t you just sit back and enjoy the fire,” he said bending down to remove her shoes and then pull her legs to the center of the couch. Reaching over to the other leather chair, T.J. retrieved one of his mother’s Pendleton woolen blankets and gently draped it over Erika’s shoulders.
She smiled gratefully for his thoughtful attention then nestled into the luxurious down filled cushions to enjoy the heat emanating from the immense fireplace. The occasional pop and crack from the cedar kindling soothed her tired nerves. The comforting surroundings lulled her into a state of semi-consciousness. But it was the heat, the soothing heat from the fire that finally claimed her.
As T.J. made his way back to the Great Room, fully intending to enjoy his evening and find out as much about the entrancing woman as he could, he stopped abruptly as his eyes fell on a most delightful sight. Unknowingly, he held his breath as he afforded his eyes a most luxurious sight. T.J. was used to beautiful women, exquisite women. But nothing had prepared him for a sight such as this. He knew in that moment of gazing at her delightful form, now fast asleep, that he loved her more than words could tell, perhaps more that anything else in his life. The firelight had turned her hair a burnt amber as it fell gracefully over the overstuffed arms of the caramel color couch. Quietly, so quietly he lowered their mugs of steaming chocolate on the nearby wood carved coffee table. Then gently lifting her feet upward, he slowly slipped into place next to her, lowering her stocking feet onto his lap.
Taking a drink of his steaming mug, T.J. began to once again study the woman that he now thought of as a sweetheart. She was so beautiful, so exquisite. But that wasn’t why he was falling in love with her ... it was just an added bonus. Thinking back, he knew his love began with his first glimpse into her molten colored eyes. It was her soul that had claimed him. It was the obvious way she went about everything. Nothing was ever very subtle about her. Every emotion showed in her eyes. Memories of their weeks together ran through his mind. From their fiery encounters to the gentleness of their first kiss.
T.J. sighed as he ran his strong fingers through his wavy locks. It was all so disconcerting. Why couldn’t it be easier. He recalled the endless conversations his sisters had with their mother while they were falling in love with their now husbands. It had all seemed so simple. They met, fell in love and got married. There were no battles to fight, no barriers to overcome. It had all seemed so forthright and honest. Why couldn’t it be like that for Marie and himself.
Tomorrow, he promised himself. Tomorrow when he took her to his favorite place at the lake, he would tell her the truth. And ... they wouldn’t leave until she also told him the truth. About ... everything.
Chapter Thirteen
The sky was a deep azure, the tamaracks were on fire with their golden and reddish hues. The pine trees perfumed the pungent air. The sun was a faint reminder of the dog days of summer. Wednesday was, in fact, a perfect day. It was christened such by T.J. He could not recall a more picture-perfect day. It was one that would be long remembered, he knew. In fact, if he would only stop and think, however, he would know that he had the same feeling every morning that he awoke with the expectation of spending it with Marie.
Perseverance and patience had finally brought this day to fruition. Many nights he sat awake, starring either at the inky black lake, or a brilliant cityscape atop his Los Angeles condominium, thinking. Thinking of this day, of the words he would use ... if the time were ever right. He had searched his heart and searched his mind. And finally, ... he just knew. This feeling he had for her ... it wouldn’t pass. It was too deeply embedded in his soul. So, then he decided. Nothing ... absolutely nothing could deter him from his self-imposed mission.
He stretched his tired muscles in the weak morning sun. It wasn’t often that one could expect a day such as this in October at Priest Lake. T.J. accepted it with gratitude because today, he would take Marie to Roosevelt Forest, an ancient forest of Cedars. They would walk the trails, view the thousand-year-old Firs and then picnic in the open meadow of Granite Pass.
He would wait for the right moment. And then, at that precise moment, he would share a part of his innermost being. Each would speak the truth until all unanswered questions were satisfied. And then, they would plot their future, together… God willing. It still seemed so sudden. A tentative smile lit his eyes as he contemplated the rest of his life.
The last thing I needed on this trip was to fall in love, he thought to himself. It was so completely unexpected. T.J. enjoyed the unexpected, if it didn’t come too close. It bothered him somewhat. But, though he mentally argued the notion of falling so quickly in love, it wouldn’t go away. It was as if she had already crawled inside of him, niggling constantly until he finally gave up and accepted it as destiny.
T.J.’s intellect reminded him of all the challenges that lay ahead. That it would be hard on her was unquestioned. She would need to learn a whole new way of life. But he believed with all his heart that his love would bring them through the trying times ahead.
He wondered, not for the first time, what his parents would think of her. That mattered very much. All he had intended to do today was to declare his love for her. She may not even share his emotion, although her eyes had given him every indication that she did.
T.J. busied himself by packing the few essentials they would need for their hike into the glorious wilderness. It was a trail he knew well. It led to the most breathtaking view in Boundary County, perhaps in the whole country. As he anticipated their trip, T.J. recognized the significance of taking Erika to his hilltop hideaway. It was that secret place where he would retreat to ponder every crucial decision in his life. No one else had ever been there with him.
Often T.J.’s mind would wander back to that first encounter with Kaniksu Cliff at the very top of Granite Pass. He had named it Kaniksu, claiming it as his own more than twenty years earlier. That summer had been exceptionally long. Most of T.J.’s friends had elected to stay in the city. Torrential rain had hit the little community, making travel miserable. And thus, T.J. was bored. His oldest sister, Maria, along with his mother were planning her wedding and swatches of pale yellow and white polka dot fabric along with bridal magazines littered Bear Creek Lodge. Endless hours of inactivity stretched before him.
His father also had been more than occupied that summer, leaving very little time for play. Papa, too, had little time to spare because business at the marina was booming. Maime, as always, was occupied with the women in his young life.
It was on such a day when T.J. thought he could bear no more. So, he did what every little boy does who spends summers in a lake side community, he went fishing.
It had been great fun for a while. Every s
o often he would move a little farther up river, trying in vain to catch that perfect fish. Soon, however, the ruggedness of the wilderness began to claim his faltering interest.
An owl would fly overhead, followed a while later by a majestic eagle. Papa’s homemade fishing pole soon lay near a rock at the side of the river, forgotten by a boy now chasing that eagle in hopes of viewing its nest.
The trail that was at first wide open in the middle of a green meadow, narrowed precariously. T.J.’s imagination recalled anecdotes from his favorite adventure stories. Suddenly those stories became real and in his imagination, he was cast in the role of a famous explorer. Wandering farther and farther into the woods, the storyline came to life as he remembered creatures from those books so vividly.
At times, he would fight for his life with a Grizzly Bear ... at other times it would be a wolf. But, it was always very dangerous. It was during one of these episodes that T.J. crested that hill and experienced the most divine moment of his young life. The exhilaration of climbing more than five hundred feet and finding yourself above the clouds, overlooking the most pristine lake in the world was more than breathtaking. Even at the tender age of twelve, T.J. knew he saw creation at its best. Untouched and pure.
Suddenly the remainder of that summer flew by in seemingly a few short weeks. Kaniksu Cliff was his. He had conquered the unconquerable.
T.J.’s mother would become alarmed at the hours he spent away from the Lodge. Often a scolding awaited him when the mudroom door slammed open and dinner was already in progress. Little did the Morgan’s know the impact Kaniksu Cliff would have on their son’s life.
Hurriedly T.J. checked his watch. Precious time had escaped as he reminisced about his childhood. Checking their supplies one more time, T.J. decided to retrieve one of his mother’s blankets just in case the weather took a turn.
Jogging back toward the lodge, T.J. mentally planned their hike. By the time he picked her up and they had hiked the seven miles along the river to the trail, it should be lunchtime. They could picnic in the open meadow. He thought she would like that. And then, they would need to hike that grueling dirt trail crudely carved alongside the peak. The hike would be challenging to Marie, he knew. It was tough for him and he had been doing it several times a year since age twelve.
The majesty of the view would make it all worthwhile, however. T.J. anticipated Erika’s reaction to his cliff and the crude shelter he had built as a kid alongside that bluff. His hideaway was very special to him. It housed some of his greatest treasures. A broken arrowhead, a prized fishing hook used in landing his very first fish, a couple of yellowed newspaper articles about his high school football days, and a couple of old hunting guides.
The little hut was primitive. As a boy, he had haphazardly stacked odd pieces of timber and logs together to form a crude shelter. Later T.J. had purchased the land and hired a contractor to reinforce the structure creating something of a hunting cabin. Still, it was very rustic. Simple. T.J. liked it that way.
It had taken longer than expected to reach the meadow. Erika’s attention was diverted countless times as she examined delicate wildflowers or curious chipmunks or stopped to enjoy an especially delightful view. So, by the time they had stopped for lunch, it was well past the nooning hour. But, it had been well worth the diversions.
“This is the most delicious lunch I’ve ever had,” Erika pronounced to T.J. while reclining on the patchwork quilt he had thoughtfully brought along. “If you tell me that you fried the chicken, made the pâte, purchased these incredibly delicious and delicate butter crackers, roasted the pork for these tiny sandwiches and cut out these cute little ruffles in the cucumbers, I will never, ever, ever cook anything for you in my life,” she wholeheartedly promised.
After a long silence, causing Erika to sharply raise her eyebrows at T.J., he finally chuckled. “I’m trying to decide if I want to admit to my culinary skills to save you the undoubted strife of preparing a whole meal by yourself, or to be honest and say that I couldn’t cook like this to save my life and keep you on the hook for that meal promised oh, so long ago.”
“I didn’t think you could do all this,” she proclaimed enthusiastically. “This had to be the work of Maime. Actually,” she said while stretching her length along the quilt and propping her elbow under her mane of hair. “I don’t think you know what you’re getting yourself in for by eating my food,” she said while absently gathering tiny blades of grass strewn across the quilt.
“Oh, yea, and what does that mean,” T.J. responded while likewise stretching his immense length along the same quilt which was quite uncomfortable because the quilt reached only from abdomen to mid thigh.
“Just that I think you will be pleasantly surprised,” Erika responded with a coy smile. “I’ve been taking lessons from a Master Chef since I arrived in your woods and I’m pleased to say that, as in everything I attempt, I’m doing exceptionally well. And my repertoire now goes well beyond huckleberry jam,” she said of her Harvest Festival prizewinner. And at his comical expression of unbelief quickly added,” Just ask my instructor.”
“Are you always this confident? Or should I say ‘self congratulatory?’”
“Always,” she teased.
“Well then, let’s see how good you are at climbing that,” he said pointing a finger to a dirt trail partially cut out of a hillside.
Letting her chin rise slightly, Erika said with more confidence than she possessed, “I’m up to it if you are.”
After quickly gathering their belongings, T.J. and Erika made their way slowly up the hillside trail. He was pleased at how well she did with some very difficult terrain. It wasn’t long before they crested the hilltop of Granite Pass and T.J. knew great satisfaction at Erika’s sharp intake of breathless wonder.
With the boyish pride of a twelve-year-old, T.J. proudly showed Erika his hideaway and precious possessions to which she uttered delight.
It wasn’t long before T.J. again spread the quilt across a grassy space with a spectacular view of the self-named Kaniksu Cliff and the stunning Priest Lake beyond. With perfect contentment, each laid on their stomachs, watching the creature world unfold before them. A hawk soared above, circling something near the open meadow. Birds sang sweetly in the distant trees. The utter solitude was something very new to Erika. She knew in that moment, Kaniksu Cliff was a memory never to be forgotten.
Soon however, T.J.’s eyes searched Erika’s. His gaze looked deeply into her soul.
“Well then,” he responded in the same light tone they had shared during lunch. “When do I get to sample your newly acquired skills?” he asked referring to her lessons with Maime.
“That all depends on you,” she said sweetly.
“What does that mean?” he asked immediately interested.
“That means that when I decide you’re worth it …”
“So, that is how it is,” he said reaching out to tickle her side immediately releasing an explosion of giggling contentment.
“There was one other thing I’ve been wondering about ...”
A considerable pause. Erika innately knew that the tide of emotions was beginning to twist and turn in the wake of their previous light heartedness. Finally, after an interminable silence, she responded breathlessly, knowing somehow that the next few minutes would irrevocably change her forever, yet powerless to do anything but ask, “And that is...”
“How accomplished are you at this...” he breathed knowing also that they were just now taking that leap into the unknown. Yet instead of feeling frightened as was she, he relished every moment.
Gently, ever so gently, he pulled her into a comfortable embrace, wrapping long tapered fingers into her silken strands subtly pulling her closer. After minutes of gazing into each other’s eyes, his mouth found hers, sealing a fate each knew could splinter their lives forever.
His lips tasted hers. At first, it was tentative and tender. Each relishing the newness of sensation. And then, ever so slightly, the moo
d changed. The creature sounds of their cliffside hideaway fell away. Their worlds meshed, centered entirely on their newfound intimacy. His heart began to beat rythmically. Soon, her rhythm matched his.
She gasped as his muscled arms wrapped around her slender body drawing her even farther into his embrace, closing the chasm that had thus far kept them at arms length. She was drowning. Nothing mattered anymore. Not her Uncle Lawrence, not Capital, not money or station ... not anything. All that existed in this new world was Tim. His rippled chest sheltered her from the reality, creating instead a private paradise.
The kiss deepened claiming their fleeting and scattered thoughts. So gentle, so loving, so respectful he had been. Minute gave way to minute. The kiss went on and on. Time no longer mattered, schedules no longer mattered. Their two worlds had become one.
Tiny sounds came from the back of Erika’s throat as she gave way to the emotions cascading around her. Barrier after barrier was broken. T.J., hearing her acquiescence, deepened his foray into her body and her soul.
Caution slipped further as they first rolled one way in their attempt to become closer and then another. The intensity increased, as their bodies became warm and liquid and limp.
Erika couldn’t summon a rational thought. All she could do was feel. And though she treasured their first kiss on the dance floor at Elkins the evening before, it was nothing compared to this.
Before she knew what had happened, she was lying almost on top of T.J. with her slender arms wrapped tightly around his neck. His coarse black curls were wrapped tightly through her fingers.
Slowly, her mind was beginning to form a single thought. A thought she wished could be buried at the moment. Never before had she ever been so physically lost, so affected, so controlled by passion that one ceased to exist.
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