by C. M. Owens
“I’m fine. The last twenty-four hours have just been a little exhausting. I think I’m going to go get some more rest before this party I just learned about,” I sigh out in an effort to keep my true feelings hidden.
“Do you need something to wear?” he asks curiously while following me up to my room.
“No. I’ve got several things I can wear. Just don’t make me wait forever,” I grouse.
“I don’t plan on it. A lot more about me has changed than you realize.”
I lean against the door in the hallway that promises to remove me from our intensely locked stare, but it’s almost impossible to open it all the way.
“I’ll see you later then,” I force out as casually as I possibly can.
“Definitely.” He leans in closer to push open the door I haven’t been able to attempt to open. “Make sure you’re ready,” he says with obvious innuendo, and I’m worried I will be ready - for him.
I can’t do this.
I shut the door the moment I’m inside, and I flop my head in my hands before more of my shameful tears fall free.
I can’t make this mistake. I love Brazen.
“Ms. Crush?” asks Wendy - Hale’s personal assistant and human groupie.
“Come in,” I say a little too casually considering the daring dress I’m wearing to join Hale at this function.
“Wow,” she gushes when she walks in, and she very slowly shuts the door while her mouth gapes open.
“I shouldn’t wear this, should I? It might give him the wrong idea,” I grumble.
I start rifling through my closet while trying to find a more suitable replacement for this very snug, slinky one strap dress. It’s much shorter than I realized, and I don’t even know why in the hell I brought it to begin with.
“I have a skirt in here somewhere,” I murmur aloud.
“You have to wear the dress. The function is a little too formal for a business skirt. There’s nothing wrong with looking good,” she says with a devious smile.
“I wish I had brought something a little less showy.”
“Can I ask you a personal question, Ms. Crush?” she asks curiously.
“I suppose,” I warily respond.
“I’ve always wondered about you. I’ve seen your pictures, but I’ve never heard the story about why the happy girl in the photos left,” she says with gentle prying finesse.
“Oh,” I huff, then I feel confused about her plural phrasing. “Pictures?”
“Yes. There’s a couple in his room, and there’s several in his office. He keeps one in his wallet as well as one in each of his personal vehicles. Not to mention his personal and work computers. They’re all loaded down with pictures of you that scroll across at all times of the day. And his phone-”
“Okay. Okay,” I interrupt with a little bit of startled shock. “I get it. Hale has a lot of pictures of me.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be too… annoying. Captain Banner just seems like a really great guy, and I couldn’t help but be curious about the girl that stole his heart before walking away. He won’t even look at another girl, and I’ve never seen that sort of loyalty demonstrated by anyone.”
I’m on the verge of tears, and it’s all I can do to keep standing up right now. My mind becomes overwhelmed with all the good destroyed by all the bad.
“He missed my birthday party,” I say very casually.
“Birthday party?” she says with complete bemusement.
“Along with my award ceremonies, my rank ceremonies, and every other event he promised to attend. When he was home, he was working. Most of the time he lied to me about where he had been or what he had been doing even if I had the security clearance to hear it. My birthday party was the last straw,” I say with a sigh, and my eyes fall to her immortality promise bracelet.
“You’re not far from being turned, are you?” I ask bluntly.
“No ma’am. I have two years of the five year reconsideration period before they carry it out.”
“You’ve probably been a normal human with normal parents for the majority of you life, correct?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Then a birthday party might seem a little petty to someone like you. Let me ask you something, have they told you of what’s to come after your initial change?” I ask softly while sitting down behind the bar.
“The first twenty to thirty years I’ll have to be locked up until the rabid thirst subsides. Then I’ll be coaxed back into society,” she murmurs with very little hesitance for her bleak first years.
“Did they tell you what else would most likely happen?” I ask curiously.
“I’m not sure what you’re asking.”
I take a deep breath, and I swallow hard against the emotional knot in my throat before continuing.
“They’ll choose someone deserving of the opportunity to feed from a vein, and then they’ll come for you. You’ll feel the bite, and it’s going to feel like erotica has just exploded in your body. You’ll be completely and utterly in love until the effect wears off, and by then, you’ll already be pregnant. You’ll be unable to care for a child, so it will be up to the father to assume responsibility, or they’ll hand the child over to the United for placement. Almost always, the child is orphaned. The full blood society outside the United frowns on species mingling, and it’s not an easy task to take on.
“That child will then grow up with soldiers instead of parents, martial arts instead of playgrounds, and survival skills instead of hugs. It’s a tough life to go through, and it’s hard - very hard - to trust anyone. It’s even harder to fall in love. When someone says they’ll be there and they’re constantly not, that small, terrified child inside comes back out.
“I’ve been around a long time ago, but three years ago is the first time I’ve ever had a birthday party. Clay - Commander Jude - planned an elaborate party just for me. Everyone was invited, and I can remember crying I was so excited. Hale promised me over and over he’d be there. It’s Hale’s nature to forget what day it is, or be three hours late to a one hour event. He promised me he’d be there and be on time before leaving three days earlier on a scouting mission he didn’t have to take. He was so ambitious, and in the end, he proved he loved the job and the United more than me.
“He didn’t show up until the next morning, and he didn’t even have an excuse worth hearing. I was always there for him - any time he needed me - so it cut pretty damn deep when he couldn’t do this one thing. I finally realized he was never going to love me the way I loved him, and it nearly tore me apart. It was never really about the party, it was more about the fact he didn’t care enough about me to be there,” I murmur with a very deep explanation.
“Oh,” she sighs with a taken aback stare. “That’s so weird to hear because Captain Banner is so prompt now. I suppose it’s because he lost you due to his inability to be such,” she murmurs, and I know she’s doing her best to defend him without offending me.
“Sometimes people wait too late to change,” I sigh out.
“Did Captain Mordel have a child when he was turned?” she bluntly asks.
“No. Brazen was born a full blood. They’re a lot like us - the hybrids. They age normally until they peak, and then the change slowly sets in. It takes about seven or eight months to fully turn, and then they’re frozen n time, never aging. Unlike us though, they’re immortal, well they don’t have a span like we do rather. Hybrids have so many hundreds of years to live.”
“And yours? How long is your span?”
“I never let them test me to find out. I rather like not knowing. Since I’m a gifted hybrid, I don’t age. The ungifted do age, just much, much slower than the… your kind.”
“I’m sorry I grilled you so much,” she says with a grimace.
“It’s fine. I think the more educated you are the better. This world you want to live in, well… it has its prices for all of us. I just hope you’re ready to pay them.”
She exhales as all the crazy pieces scat
ter throughout her fragile mind, and then she starts to walk out the door.
“Oh,” she says while turning back around. “I almost forgot why I came in here. Captain Banner asked me to tell you that you could join him in his cabin if you got ready early. He was wanting to show you something you can only view from his room,” she says with a growing grin.
I bet he does. Smug bastard.
“Thanks Wendy,” I say softly, and then I glance over to see it’s barely a quarter after five.
I guess it wouldn’t hurt to see what he’s talking about, though my conscience immediately screams at me for considering it. Don’t go!
I walk the short distance to his room, and I rudely open the door without so much as knocking. I instantly regret such a bold maneuver when I see him standing by his huge window that overlooks the back half of the compound. He’s on the phone, and he’s in some low pants that are barely hanging on his waist enough to cover up the area I’m far too familiar with. His shirtless upper body is calling to me, taunting me with his dripping seduction. His perfect V is showing from his lower abdomen to his before the waistband of his pants hide the rest, and his rippling abs stretch up to meet his exquisitely toned, smooth chest. The throbbing I’ve felt in dull beats now pounds fiercely inside my walls, making feel the urge to double over. I shift my weight from left to right instead, though I lack subtly. It’s just too much for me to ignore, and I squirm as an effect, my temperature rising as it always does around him.
He smiles when he sees me and motions for me to join him when I finally snap out of my drooling trance - my foolish eyes removing themselves from his sculpted physique.
“Thanks, Hubert. I’ll make sure the others are well aware when they return,” he says into the phone.
“Good evening, Captain,” a gruff voice from the other end of the phone offers.
“Good evening indeed,” Hale replies somewhat salaciously, his eyes running the full length of my body just as mine did his.
He casually drops his phone to the couch while bringing his eyes back to stare directly into my trembling ones.
“You look incredible,” he gushes.
You look fucking hot.
“Thanks. You look like I got here too early,” I mumble, my terrified eyes trying not to look at his slice-of-heaven body… again.
He smirks as he pulls my hand in his and leads me over to the window.
“That’s what I wanted you to see,” he murmurs while pointing to a large building not too far away.
“What is it?” I muse.
I swallow hard as the slight reflection offered by the enormous window shows Hale’s half naked body pressing against my back. The aroma of his cologne mingles with his freshly showered smell and his scent - Hale’s delicious scent - making my eyes almost close so my fantasies can return.
“It’s a school specifically for hybrids. When I get done with it, it’ll have playgrounds and so much more. We already hold dances for the older ones, but now the younger ones can just be kids. I thought you might appreciate it. I’m running it by the board to have them installed for all the compounds in the future.”
In an instant, my lust turns to adoration. Tears water up in my eyes, and I stare at the building with a whole new gaze as I think of how much better life could have been.
“That’s amazing,” I choke out, and then I feel his lips pressing against the back of my hand. “What are you doing?” I sigh out.
“I’ve just wanted to share this moment with you for a really long time, and seeing your reaction made me lose my place. I’m sorry.”
I turn to stare into his perfect eyes, and then I feel him pulling me closer to his body.
“I think the school is amazing,” and so is your body, “but I should probably go back to my room to wait on you to get ready. This isn’t exactly appropriate behavior for two colleagues,” I breathe out with a rattling tone.
“I’m not trying to be two colleagues.”
Oh damn.
His slightly damp chest finds its way under my hands as I slowly let them creep up, and then I forcefully push him away when the heat becomes unbearable.
“Stop,” I assert, but I can’t stifle my stupid grin.
“Fine,” he chuckles out. “Stay though. I won’t take long, and we can head down.”
I hold back my grin until he leaves, and then I return to the window. I see my reflection more than I see the outside when he cuts the lights up brighter. My long, dark hair is curled loosely, and it dangles around my shoulders.
The tinted sky is almost too dim to even see a glow now. My sparkly jewels dangle from my ears with more light than the outside, and my eyes glisten with a bit too much anxiety - my hybrid blue eyes circled by the purple rim.
I walk over to pull out a bottle of whiskey, and I pour a generous glassful. The soft music begins playing, and my eyes begin rolling immediately. He walks back out with a wolfish grin, and my jaw tries not to hit the floor when I see how ridiculously hot he looks.
His suit is tailored to fit his body with custom finesse, and his light eyes match the brilliant tie. His darker blue shirt is crisp with buttons that would be so easy to rip free. He stalks toward me with his brilliant, full-flashing grin, and I roll my eyes while releasing my lower lip from the hold my teeth had on it.
“I take it you like the way I look,” he teases, and I just turn my glass up to hide my smile.
“You’re still cocky I see,” I say jokingly.
“Very,” he snickers out, and then his hand takes mine to lead me toward the door.
“I need to set my cup down,” I murmur in an effort to make an excuse to drop his hand, and then my eyes catch sight of a picture hanging in the bedroom, drawing me toward it.
The door he had shut behind him has slowly slid back open, and I make my way to his room without permission.
“Araya? You okay?” he calls from the hallway.
I ignore him as I continue on my prying mission, and I gasp when I open the door the rest of the way to see a large frame holding an enlarged picture of me sleeping in our old room we had together.
There’s a rose delicately resting on the pillow beside my cheek. I remember that day so well. He had been gone for over a month, and he bought that rose for me as a way of saying he was sorry for an argument we had before he left. I had woken up to it, and he was sitting on the bed beside me.
The love we made that morning was phenomenal, and we lay in bed all day long just holding our naked bodies against each other. I never knew such a picture existed, and now here it is in his room, hanging above his bed like a piece of artwork.
“That was one of the best days we ever had together,” his gentle voice interjects from behind.
“It was,” I sigh with a reminiscing tone.
“You ready now that you’ve inspected my bedroom?” he teases.
“I just wanted to see the picture,” I say with a touch of embarrassment.
“I’ll gladly give you a tour of the rest of it if you want to get better acquainted. We can start with the bed,” he provocatively jokes, and I nudge his side with my elbow as I head out of the room.
His hand takes mine once more, but I don’t fight it this time. I know this is wrong, and I still love Brazen, but I can’t just deny that Hale means something to me. I have to get the hell out of Seminole before I ruin the best thing for me. Brazen would never forgive me if this went too far, and I wouldn’t blame him.
The light strikes me in a blinding fashion when we walk into the laser show going on in the banquet hall. A girl runs up to Hale, her giggles shrill to blare her excitement.
“Captain Banner, would you dance with me tonight?”
He grins kindly at her before he delivers his cushioned rejection.
“I’m sorry, Penelope. I’ve got a date this evening, and I feel it would be rather rude to dance with someone else.”
“I thought she was engaged to that full blood, Captain… Mordel,” she says with baffled shock.
&n
bsp; Oh damn. What am I doing?
“Excuse me,” I say with shame lining my words. “I need to go grab a drink.”
I start guzzling the first thing I smell alcohol in, and Hale’s front is suddenly pressed against my back.
“You have to stop this. It’s brutal,” I whimper.
“It’s not so easy on me either. Dance with me,” he murmurs against the back of my head.
“We shouldn’t.”
“Who gives a damn if two old friends dance? I promise I’ll behave,” he says playfully.
I laugh lightly while wiping away a stray tear. He pulls me to his body, and then I feel us moving to the music before I ever give my consent. I nestle my head into his chest, and his arms tighten around me as if he’s clinging to me for the last time. It needs to be the last time.
“I can’t do this,” I whimper, tears falling more fiercely, and I run out of the room to the hallway of the enormous building.
“Araya,” he calls out, and I feel my body whipping around - almost reflexively - to face him. “I love you, and I’m so sorry for everything I ever did wrong. I swear I’ll be the man you always wanted me to be if you just take me back. I need you,” he pleads.
“No!” I yell. “You keep acting like I just up and left, but I didn’t. You pushed me away for two fucking years. The second they took me, you started disappearing more and more. That’s when I needed you the most. I spent days in a basement chained up and feeling electricity surging through my body so they could provoke my power. They did everything they fucking could to get me to do it, and if I had of, people for miles would have been killed from my overworked state. There’s not telling how bad it would have gotten before you found me.
“I had to deal with all that shit on my own when I finally got rescued because you were never home. I would wake up screaming for hours because of the nightmares that ensued, but you weren’t there to comfort me. I would cry myself to sleep because the shadows felt like people coming to take me away again. I shattered three houses just because my dreams and fears became too overwhelming. If it hadn’t been for Brazen, I would have probably been locked away in some asylum with medicine to numb my wild mind from doing more harm. Do you get that?” I cry out, and I see tears wavering in his eyes now.