by Jones, P. A.
My heart sunk in pain; that was the thing that looked impossible. “I forgot to tell you one thing. Gerome is back.”
“What?” She jumped from the couch. “Did you just say Gerome, who died two years ago?” She covered her mouth with her palm, her pupils widened.
“Yes, indeed. And this all happened when Tristan was going to ask me on a date.”
“What? Your macho man was going to ask you on a date and your dead husband came back? Is it a fiction story? Last time I checked, the dead only came back in Walking Dead and not in real life,” she muttered very fast.
“Yes, but it’s true.” I showed her a picture of Gerome drinking whiskey in my home.
“But how is this even possible?”
“Apparently, my dad made it all up and forced him to stay away from me. I know it’s possible and it’s really him. I can promise you that.”
“That’s a bummer, dear. What about Tristan now?” Carrie asked.
“I don’t know. I really like him and he is the one who saved my life, pampered me like a princess and played with my kid so much that even Gerome wouldn’t have done that.”
“But Gerome is the father of your son and you can’t deny that.”
“I don’t know. It’s hard to know what to do. I feel lost. Tristan was about to ask me on a dinner date. And the card I found in his car said more than a date.” I released my breath. Whenever I thought about getting away from him, my heart skipped a bit and I held my breath for moments.
“If you ask me, I would suggest you go with Gerome. He is Stephen’s father and sooner or later, Stephen would start asking about him. What would you tell him then? And I think you should give him a chance. It wasn’t like you hated him before he left. If he is telling you the truth, then he deserves a second chance.”
“I don’t know, Carrie. I don’t know anything. It’s just weird and I feel like running away from here, somewhere very far where I can just leave with Stephen.” And Tristan, I said to myself.
“Nikki, you know that I love you as my sister.”
“Yes, you do.”
“Then try to think logically. You know Gerome from your college days, and as much I know him, he is a nice guy.”
“He was and he may be. But not as nice as Tristan.” My heart was squeezed between my own wishes. I wanted to be with Tristan as much I wanted to live. But what Carrie was suggesting was also true and logical. “Logic doesn’t go well with my heart.” I was exhausted by all these thoughts. “Right now, I just need a glass of wine and a good night’s sleep with my sweetheart.”
“Take the bedroom, I will sleep on the couch. But before that, let me give you a glass of wine—some I stole from your refrigerator.” She giggled and went inside.
Tristan
I woke up when the sun’s rays started burning my cheeks. What the fuck? Then I remembered what had happened to me. How I’d gotten into a frenzy and finished complete bottles of whiskey in one night. Reality sank inside me slowly and along with it, the heartache, disappointment, and loneliness filled in. I relaxed my head on the couch and closed my eyes. There was nothing I could do. I just couldn’t ask Nikki to be with me when her husband was back from the dead. I couldn’t be that selfish with the woman I loved. But then, also, I couldn’t just sit alone and do nothing to get my anger out.
I need training. I need to hit someone so I can take my anger out on them.
I pressed my hands on the couch to balance myself. Blackness covered my eyes for a second when I stood on my legs. Damn it. Slowly, I walked to the training room. I picked up my gloves and tied them to my hand. The boxing bag was the only thing I could hit and feel better.
“Here you go.” I hit it with my right hand first, and before I could hit it again with my left hand, everything went dark. Something hit my face hard and my ass touched the ground pretty fast. A wave of pain shot across my hips and then everything went blank.
Chapter 8
Tristan
“What the hell?” My head was bursting with pain and my butt was sliding bare-assed on asphalt. What’s happening with me, why is it hurting so much?
Oh, damn. I remembered exactly what happened to me before I lost consciousness. I touched my forehead to feel the pain.
It tasted bitter inside my mouth, but it was so real that I could feel everything. I could feel the pain emerging in a spot at my forehead and then passing through my whole body, slowly and passionately. Pain was beautiful for the first time.
As the first pain subsided the second pain took its place. It was coming from my stomach. I was noticing the hunger. “Yes, I haven’t eaten in last couple of days.” I need to get on the road and grab a bite or I will die like this. But will it be different than what I am facing right now? Will it be different than the pain of losing Nikki?
“Whatever, I am going to grab something.”
I stood up with the help of the treadmill. Pain was killing me, but the hunger was greater than the pain. If I didn’t eat something, I would just die.
I didn’t care about clothes I was wearing, I just went to grab my keys. weren’t there, in the regular place. I searched my pockets, but nothing was there, either. Where the hell did I put my keys.“Fuck, I gave them to Nikki.” Her name painted sadness over the walls of my heart. Nikki Jordan, what should I do to get you back?
“Maybe my destiny doesn’t want me to be with someone like you and my life will remain in vain after all,” I muttered to myself.
I opened the door and BAM. I could see what it meant to have birds flying around your head in cartoon movies; I was feeling exactly the same way.
Out of nowhere, Trisha ran into me.
“Ouch, what...Tristan,” she yelled in pain.
“I should ask you what you’re doing here? And why did you hit me.” Her head had banged on my chest, but my head was on the spin, maybe because of the hunger.
“My head, it’s hurting like anything.”
“Okay, come in.”
I took her in and then I realized my mistake. “What are you doing here?”
“I came to check on you. And what is all this?” She stared at the mess I’d made in my hall.
“Nothing, just stumbled on the table I set up.”
“A table with champagne? Did you plan to propose someone? Nikki?” She looked shocked. “But what really happened here? She said no and you took it out on the table?” She bent to clean up the scattered glass.
She was smart for her age.“You don’t need to do that. I’ll do it later.” Even talking that much made me weaker.
She started collecting the broken pieces together.“I don’t get what just happened to you, in just two days. You look completely changed.”
I brought some water for her. That, too, weakened me a lot. Every word I was speaking and every step I was taking was driving me to another round of unconsciousness.
“Thanks," She said as she sipped water from the glass. I realized I needed water, too. I drank a full glass without taking a breath and then I realized that was a mistake. I could feel my appetite getting more intense. I felt my knees go weak and I fell down on the couch.
“Are you okay?” Trisha asked.
“Yes, just a bit of weak.”
“What happened to your phone? It’s been switched off for the last two days.”
“Last two days? Just yesterday morning I visited the store, didn’t I?”
“No, you visited the day before yesterday when you had to attend a court case with Nikki.” Her eyebrows lowered.
“It was yesterday, Trisha, What date is it?” I checked on my watch. Fuck. I’d missed a whole day? “Shit, I missed a complete day here. How could I miss the complete last twenty-four hours.”
“You could if you were drowned in alcohol. You smell like a mess.” She scrunched her nose.
I smelled myself. Damn, I smelled gross. “Let me...”
Then my stomach started growling. I had to eat something.“I need to get some food first. I haven’t eaten in the last
two days,”
“Oh, dear. Let’s go to the restaurant down the street and we will have lunch. But at least change into something else. Even your clothes look dirty and gross.” She looked at me from head to toe. “Do you need me to go and grab some clothes for you?”
“No, thanks.” I didn’t want her to see my bedroom. I slowly went to my room and changed into a t-shirt and a pair of jeans. Dragging my jeans up took me an eternity.
“Do you need my help, Tristan?” Trisha shouted from the hall.
“I’m fine. Give me a second.” I cursed her and pulled my jeans up. I felt like I was wasting a ton of energy in just pulling up my jeans that fast.
“Let’s go,” I said, as I walked outside.”Did you come by car?”
“Do I have a car? Where is yours? I’ll drive.”
“Sorry.” I forgot she didn’t have a car.”I dropped it off for servicing. Let’s catch a cab.” I walked to the door like a drunk. The fatigue was killing me from the inside out.
A soft hand grabbed my arm as I was struggling my way out of the closed door. Trisha balanced me and opened the door. “I should take you to the doctor first.”
“No doctor. I’m fine. I just need some food.” I stood still with her support and somehow we managed to pick a cab and get to a nearby restaurant.
“I want chizza, lots of chizza,” I said, as I saw delicious pizza being served at a table. The smell of pizza intrigued my taste buds and every cell of my body. It had been a long time since I’d eaten pizza—it was not on my diet plan.
“What?” Trisha looked at me, puzzled.”Oh, you mean pizza.” She grinned from ear to ear. “You naughty boy. Okay, I’ll order one.”
Why had she laughed?
The next forty minutes went by like a flash. I ate, then ate and then again ate. Pizza wasn’t a healthy food in my diet, but it was the best food to give me energy at that moment.
“Eat slowly, Tristan, are you nuts? You are eating like a maniac,” she said, while eating her second piece.
“I need to get something to drink now.” I needed more booze. My heart was again getting filled with darkness. The desert of my heart was on fire and the only thing that could save me was whiskey on the rocks.
“Are you crazy? You can’t have drinks now. I’ll take you home and then you lay your butt there, no more alcohol.” She raised her voice like she was my girlfriend.
“What are you, Trisha? My girlfriend? My mother? Or my wife? Take a cab, please.” I pushed some money on the table. I quickly walked out, but then I felt bad for what I’d just said to the little girl. She was just trying to take care of me.
But then these fucking girls care for me first and then break my heart, like it’s made of glass. My evil side spoke quickly. But Nikki didn’t break my heart, the other side replied. Did she or didn’t she?
“What the heck.” I walked in, and Trisha was still sitting at the table, holding a piece of pizza in her hands, tears rolling down her cheeks, her eyes fixed on horizon. I quickly kissed her on her forehead. “Sorry kiddo. I didn’t mean it. But I’m just too messed up right now.” The warmness of her tears reminded me of Nikki as I wiped them with my thumbs. Why did these girls have to cry at everything? Can’t they just ignore the assholes like me. Why do they have to care?“Sorry again.” Without listening to her, I turned around. The last thing I wanted was care from a woman.
“Taxi.” I called a cab. “Take me to any open bar.” I slid a hundred buck note through the glass barrier between us. “Hundred more if you drop me back at my house after an hour.”
The driver just smiled and gave me a thumbs up. He must have been happy to get a rich bastard in his cab.
“I’ll wait outside,” the old driver said, while stopping the cab in front of an open bar.
“Thanks, I’ll be back soon.” I needed some whiskey in my system to get Nikki out of my mind. I pushed the wooden door and a bouncer stopped me from entering.
“Sir, may I see your ID, please?” His football0type eyes were fixed on me. His shoulders were broad, like a truck tire.
“What? Do I look like a fucking college student?” I hissed.
“Sorry, sir, but it’s our security protocol. I’ll scan it once and then you can enter.”
“Are you crazy or something? Why do I need to show my ID? Where is your manager?”
“Even he won’t allow you without showing your ID. Can I have your ID now?” He continued staring in my eyes.
“Make it quick,” I yelled and handed him the card. I was thirsty for the alcohol.
“Thank you, sir.”
I gave him a nasty look and entered the bar. It was nice and not too crowded. Thank God, now I can enjoy my drink.
“One large bottle of Black Daniels, please.”
The waitress handed me a bottle, a glass and a bucket of ice. “Do you need soda? Or coke?”
“No, thanks.” I started drinking one sip after another.
“Sir, are you okay?” The waitress touched my shoulder. I opened my eyes, and my half-filled glass was right in front of me. I’d laid my head on the table and the glass was in my hand.
“Oh, sorry.” I tried to lift my head.
BAM, my glass crashed in the blink of an eye on the waitress’s face. Somebody bumped into me from behind, and the glass jumped out of my hand and splashed the waitress’s s face as she was bending over me to wake me up.
“Fuck,” I shouted. I grabbed the man’s head who’d stumbled on me and pushed him away.
“Fuck you.” A splash of water sprayed on my face. The waitress had thrown a glass full of water at my mouth.
“Hey, mister. What did you just do?” A large hand grabbed my shoulder and pulled me back. I lost my balance and my butt kissed the floor pretty fast.
“Fuck you, man.” I yelled again. This time, it was the bouncer I’d talked with some time ago.
“Sir, you have to pay the bill and get out of the bar. We can’t tolerate your behavior.”
“Fuck you.” I grabbed on his legs to lift myself up.
He jerked his leg and I lost my balance again. My butt hit the floor a second time, on the same spot, but it didn’t feel funny anymore.
I pushed my hands on the floor and jumped on my legs. The next thing I knew, I hit that bounder strait on his face.
I wonder why he didn’t take it well, and then the next thing I knew, two bouncers were beating me on my chest and back. A few minutes later I was stranded to a chair. By that time, I was feeling fresh, like having morning coffee, and my body was hurting badly due to the beating I’d just received.
I didn’t know how much time I was stranded there. I lost the pace of time for a while. The pain was messing me up and I was roaming between the line of sleepiness and awake. In some time, or maybe in an hour, two cops came and took me with them. They did an alcohol test on me and I was damn sure I would find myself guilty. What the heck I have done? They took me to a police station in the cop car and threw me inside a temporary cell. The story of my life ended in a police station, after all.
Chapter 9
Tristan
It was the second or third time when I woke up fully, with the pain in my butt. What did it really do? All my senses were skewed and I could feel nothing but the pain everywhere in my body. I could hear all sorts of noise, smell all kinds of dirt and feel the rock solid surface below my body.
Where am I? The first thing I saw was one man beating another in the room. The man was all over him and hitting him with every hand and leg he had. Thank God he doesn’t have four legs, otherwise he would have killed that man already. But why am I in a room with these people? And who are they? I moved back until my head touched something solid—metallic bars. Heck, I’m in jail. Reality became rushing in front of me.
Except for my face, my body was hurting like hell. Those bouncers were pretty good in beating a man in the right places. For the first time in my life, I was in jail and that, too, after beaten up like a sack. A bitter taste of disappointment covered m
y mouth. I had gone pretty low this time.
I looked back at the fight going on inside the cell; a huge man was beating another small man like a dog. I remembered the first day I’d seen Nikki. Chase was beating a man and she’d asked for help. Oh, God, not Nikki again. I could have helped that day, but I didn’t, and today I couldn’t help that man. I didn’t feel any energy to get up and stop that bully from beating that small man. I was helpless that day, and all because of Nikki.
I chuckled as I recognized the full circle of my life coming to the very beginning. From Emma to Emma, and now Nikki to Nikki. The only difference was that I had something concrete this time. Emma never loved me and that was all affection, but this time, I had felt Nikki’s heart, her love, her care—everything was so real, and yet I was sitting behind bars thinking about my miserable life. What could I have done differently to prevent all this?
I punched the ground and felt another pain shooting through my body. Those bouncers had destroyed every ounce of strength in me. Fuck you all.
“Hey, dude, why are you beating him?” I shouted finally.
“Do you want to take his place?” The bully stopped and stared at me.
“You can try me.” The recklessness I’d felt when I was in front of Chase’s gun spread through my body again. You can only kill my body, not my spirit.
He came forward, laughing. He bent down and lifted me as if I was a weightless bag. “You are going to get the beating of your life, man.” He chuckled at the other inmates.
He held me in his left hand and punched me with other, but he was playing with an MMA fighter. Though every inch of my body was throbbing, I stopped his hand with a swift blow of my left hand and punched his face with my head.
“Stop it, guys.” The door opened and an officer came in.
The bully threw me on ground and palmed his own face. He’d gotten the beating of his day. He may overpower me next time, but that round was won by me.
The officer caught me by my collar. “Are you nuts? Look at you and look at him. I don’t want anyone getting killed in here.” He released me and pushed me back. “Come on, call your lawyer and get your ass out of here. I don’t have time to deal with white collar jerks like you.”