by Iris Blobel
“Want me to check flights?” he asked, with sadness in his voice.
Not able to look at him, she nodded into his chest and took a deep breath. “I love it here. I love being with you.” She paused. The words I love you on the tip of her tongue. “But I have to go home to see my dad. I have to, Mat.”
“I know,” he whispered. “There’ll be many more days for us to enjoy together.”
She’d been so scared to trust a man again, scared to love, but knowing how much Mat cared and understood made her fall for him even a little bit more.
Made her love him.
Made her believe she’d be able to face the challenges ahead of her.
Thirteen
Saying goodbye to Mat after their time together was like having someone ripping the floor from underneath her and her falling into a void. The helplessness of it all took her breath, with her heart pounding as she tried to form a simple sentence, but nothing came across her lips. How much she wanted to express the feelings she had towards him, but wasn’t able to move.
She wanted to step into his arms and never let go. Ever.
A lot of promises had been made over the last few days, and she hoped most of them would be kept. If not…if not, she’d still have her memories. The memories of a cut-short holiday to this amazing country, and memories of spending some unforgettable days with Mat.
He pulled her closer into his familiar embrace. “Give me a bit of time to get things sorted at this end, and I’ll come for a visit.”
She nodded, still not able to say a word.
“Baby, you’re doing the right thing. I had you for a little while, but now your dad needs you.”
Letting out a long breath, she tilted her head to meet his gaze. “There’s just too much guilt inside me to cope,” she whispered.
“Don’t. Don’t feel that way. You’ll be fine. There’s always a calm after the storm.”
“And a lot of destruction.”
His chuckle vibrated in his chest. “Ko nui taku aroha koe.8“
“It sounds so beautiful. I hope you didn’t call me a whiny woman.”
Mat moved his hands up her arms and across her shoulders before he cupped her face. He brushed her lips with his. “Believe in yourself,” he murmured against her skin. “And you’ll find that all will fall into place.” He took her pikorua necklace between his thumb and finger. “And know I’m always with you.”
“Oh, my God, Mat. How am I supposed to keep it together when you talk like this?” Tears ran down her cheeks, but she didn’t care.
He leaned in and touched her lips with a tender and searching kiss. She didn’t want to let go. She didn’t want to leave.
But her parents needed her.
After a long moment, he broke the kiss and whispered against her lips, “It’s time, baby. I’ll call you tonight.”
Without any further words, she took a deep breath, stole another quick kiss, before she headed to the departure lounge via immigration. She tried to distract herself by browsing the few shops, but in the end, it didn’t have the desired effect, and she made herself comfortable near the gate and took in the scenery. She reminisced the few days she’d spent with Mat in this beautiful country. Not only had she fallen in love with the man, but with New Zealand as well. A new feeling for her, which scared her and made her float at the same time.
It was time to go back to reality.
Four hours later, she was back home with Liam waiting for her at the airport. He brought her up to speed on her father’s health as they drove straight to the hospital. Fortunately, Tiffany was able to visit him for a small while.
She rushed beside him, pulling a chair close, and sat. “I’m so sorry, Dad. I never meant for this to happen.”
Her father placed his hand on top of her head, stroking her hair. “It’s not your fault, darling, but a sign of the times. Blame Hudson for involving you in this whole predicament.”
She wiped a tear away. “I shouldn’t have gone to New Zealand.”
“Nonsense,” he replied with a wave of his hand. “Now wipe those tears, take a deep breath, and tell me all about it. By the way, I am very angry that you came home early,” he finished with a wink.
“Dad, you’ve just had a heart attack.”
“So they’ve told me.” He chuckled.
“This is serious.”
“They’ve told me that as well, but none of this has anything to do with your holiday.”
With a shake of her head, she started to tell him all about New Zealand — the snow-capped mountains, the deep blue lakes, the many bridges, the green scenery, and that she never got to fly with Lucy, but would do that the next time she was going to visit. And even though her father had his eyes closed, she knew he was listening.
At eight o’clock, the nurse knocked and entered the room, telling Tiffany that visiting hours were over. She nodded, placed a kiss on her father’s forehead, and quietly left the room.
Feeling a little bit more at peace, yet aching for Mat.
****
The next few weeks were busy ones for Mat. Due to illness of a few pilots, he had to fill in some of the scheduled flights in Fox. And thanks to a decent weather system over the southern island of New Zealand, they were booked out for most flights. He took on the thirty-minute scenic flight over the Southern Alps, Fox Glaciers, and the crevasses with a landing in the snow above the icefalls. His favourite part was the view of Mt. Cook. It was the best job in the world. The tourists were good fun as well. Even the female ones who flirted their hearts out with him.
But he had Tiffany on his mind, and flying was the best distraction for him. Each night he returned home to his empty bed to his own thoughts and knew there would be neither sleep nor comfort for him. He missed her, ached for her company.
With a cold beer in his hand, he walked through his house and looked around. It was furnished with no expenses spared. Everything spoke of money, yet, why did it leave him so empty? He’d worked hard, had come far even without his father’s money, and he had made it on his own. His life was good, and with the start of a new business in Queenstown, it was going to be even better. Women loved him, but he only wanted one. One very special one, living in Melbourne, Australia.
He pulled his phone from his pocket and dialled the familiar number.
“Baby, how are you?” he asked, as soon as she picked up.
“It must be late over there.”
The sleepy sound of her voice did things to him. Unsure of what it was, but every cell in his body was drawn to her.
Instinctively, he checked the time. “Busy day.”
“Lots of tourists again?”
“Yup. How’s your dad?”
He was sure he heard a small sigh before she replied, “He’s settled well back home. It’s still tough on Mum, but it seems they’re both coping very well. Mum’s got all the medication under control, and Dad is a picture perfect patient.”
“Sounds like he’s in good hands.”
“Yes, he is. Liam and Mel will look after him on Saturdays, and I’m on care duty on Wednesdays to give Mum a break. So much to take into consideration after a heart attack.”
He took a quick sip of his beer as he sat on the couch staring into the darkness outside. “How are you holding up?”
There was a moment of silence, but he didn’t push her, knowing she had a big adjustment in her life as well.
“I’ve moved back into my house. I agreed to it with the police. We’re…hoping he’s coming back.” She stopped and, in just above a whisper, told him, “But I’m so scared. Even with the police on call. I’m sure I’m seeing things where there isn’t anything. It’s frigging ridiculous. I’m…I’m…”
There was a pause, and he could hear her choking back a sob. His heart ached, and he pinched the bridge of his nose to control the tension building inside him. All he wanted was to get on a plane and fly to be with her. Hold her in his arms and protect her.
Where was Liam? Or Steve? Did they really agree to this madness?
“Baby?”
She exhaled a long breath. “Sergeant Harris came by yesterday. There’s still no news. This…this guy still walks around, and I wish he had the nerve to come by again so the police can finally catch him. Living in limbo is driving me insane.”
There was another pause. He stood and walked over to the window, hoping the still of the night could give him some balance. He was scared, too. Selfishly scared, because he was able to feel her slipping out of his grasp and he couldn’t do anything. She needed someone next to her, yet, he was thousands of miles away and in another country. The helplessness and inability to do anything tore at him.
“I have no idea how I got into all this mess,” she whispered. “Apparently, Hudson was part of this drug dealing business but wanted out. He must’ve threatened them to let him live a nice, crime free life or he’d hand a list of all his partners to the police. Idiot that he was took a copy of it and mailed it to me with the incorrect house number.” She paused again, and Mat wondered whether it was a coping mechanism. Tiffany was obviously still dealing with the circumstances of it all.
He drew a long breath. “I’m heading to Auckland next week, but could come over for a few days.”
“Mat?”
“Yes, baby.”
He heard her soft breathing. He hoped he’d calmed her a little, by talking to her, or by simply by listening to his voice. Her breathing had become steadier, and it settled him as well.
“I’d love to be with you again, but…” She sighed. “It’s hard to live in this stupid reality and then having you here dreaming of what could be, yet losing focus on what’s going on.”
He didn’t understand. Was she telling him not to come? His head was throbbing and he massaged his temples with his fingertips as he tried to figure out what she was saying.
There was a slight hesitation and what sounded like a tiny tremor in her voice when she spoke again. “Give me a few weeks, Mat. Let them use me as bait, which might be hindered if you were here. I need to sort things out. I need to make sure Dad gets well and catch up on my studies. I need this guy to get arrested so I’m not scared anymore.”
He nodded, aware she wasn’t able to see him, but there was nothing he could say. Even if there had been, he wasn’t sure whether his voice would let him.
“I miss you,” she whispered. “I miss you terribly, but I hope you understand I’m busy, I’m tense, I’m tired, and I’d hate for a wrong word to destroy what we have.” He heard her soft sobs. “I know you’re patient and caring, but I know myself better. Please, don’t be mad, Mat.”
“I’m not mad,” he replied. “More disappointed.”
“I need to do this.”
It was like a kick in his gut. He had finally found the girl he wanted, and she was slipping through his fingers. Her voice had been fragile when she’d said “Give me some time.” He was happy to give her time, but scared that over time she’d forget him.
“Okay,” he agreed with a hushed voice. “I’ll wait. Give me a call when you’re ready.”
“I promise I will.”
He disconnected the call and damn him if he didn’t notice a tear on his cheek. This was going to be the longest wait ever. Despite the cooler weather and late night, he opened the door and stepped out onto the terrace. Inhaling deep breaths, he tried to calm down, tried to understand how much she needed the time to get her life back on track.
Desperate for her not to forget him.
Fourteen
When Tiffany slid behind the wheel of her car the following Wednesday, she was about to start the engine when someone grabbed her arm and jerked her out of the vehicle. Screaming, her instinct kicked in and she dived for her phone. But in vain. Her knees buckled under her as she was dragged onto the driveway, hitting the concrete hard with her legs and hips. Waves of pain washed through her when she threw her arms at the person, trying to get away from the situation. Fear shot through her when she recognised the voice. It was the same deep voice from weeks earlier, and she knew she had to fight hard and hope the police would be coming soon — exactly as they had explained.
“We have a car positioned just around the corner,” she heard Harris in her ear.
Terrified, she kicked as hard as she was able to, tried to hit her assailant with her fists as often as she could, and hoped to God Harris would come through with his promise. She screamed, but he tightened his grip around her throat, choking the air from her lungs.
“You know what I want. You‘ve had enough time.” His eyes gleamed with hatred as they met hers.
And despite her fear, a measure of relief rushed through her and her heart pounded in her chest as she heard the police car screeching to a halt in front of the house.
The next few minutes were like a blur with everything happening like a whirlwind in front of her. One of the police officers pushed her attacker away from her and overcame him quickly, clicking on the handcuffs with ease.
Tiffany tried to catch her breath as she closed her eyes and leaned against the car, flinching when someone placed an arm around her shoulder. Her eyes flew open.
“Shh, it’s over now,” Constable Jones whispered as she moved her hand up and down Tiffany’s arm to calm her. “It’s over, Tiffany. We’ve got him.”
Tears of relief ran down her cheeks and, unable to hold back, she simply leaned against the police officer and sobbed, thinking repeatedly, It’s over.
Jones helped her up on her feet and slowly guided her back into the house. “One of the officers has just rung your brother. He’ll be here in a few minutes.”
They stepped into the lounge room.
“Where’s the kitchen, Tiffany?”
She looked up, confused, before the words sank in, and then she pointed towards the door. “To the right and down the hall.”
She sat on the couch, her throat dry like sandpaper and her heart still beating like mad. Taking in a few long, deep breaths, she flinched when the door opened, but eased back into the couch when she saw Harris.
“How are you, Tiffany?”
Tears rolled down her cheeks again. “Like an emotional wreck. Happy and scared at the same time.”
He nodded, and a small smile spread across his face when they heard the kettle whistling in the kitchen. “Will you need a medical check-up?”
She declined. “They won’t be able to fix what’s wrong with me.”
He sat on the single seater. “What do you think is wrong with you?” he asked, caring and calm.
Holding up her shaking hands, she replied, “I’m a wreck. Look at me. This guy turned me into a wreck.”
Harris took her hand. “It’s the adrenaline letdown. Once your brother is here, you should take some pain relievers. It’ll help to calm you down.”
Jones came in with a cup of tea, and Tiffany was grateful for it. “You should take a pain reliever—”
Harris nodded. “Already advised her of that.”
He let go of her hand and stood. “Jones will stay until your brother arrives. I will need a statement, but I think we can leave that until later this week.”
Tiffany nodded, took the cup, and sipped the tea when Jones handed her two pills.
Even though she’d known this day would be coming, it’d been scary, exhausting, and a rollercoaster of emotions. Would she ever be able to sleep through the night again? Trust anybody?
She thought of Mat, and wasn’t sure what the emotion was that spread inside her.
Closing her eyes, she blocked the noise from outside, leaned back into the couch, and sipped the tea.
****
It took Mat a moment to orientate himself when he noticed his phone was buzzing. A quick look at the alarm told him it was just past two o’clock in the morning. He grabbed the phone and checked the ID.
Steve.
Shit. Worry bolted through him.
“Mate, what happened?�
�� he asked, by way of answering the call.
“Sorry for calling so late, but I’ve just come home. I contemplated—”
“What happened?”
“You’ve fallen real hard, haven’t you?” Steve replied with a little chuckle. “All good. In a way, anyway. The bastard came back today. The police were able to intervene straight away, and Tiffany more or less only suffered shock.”
Mat threw himself back onto the pillow and raked his free hand through his hair. The small distance between Melbourne and Queenstown suddenly seemed larger than from the earth to the moon. He would’ve given anything to be by Tiffany’s side and comfort her. Let her know he was there for her. Only suffered shock. The few words stuck in his mind, and he tried hard not to scream out in frustration.
“How is she?” he asked, as calm as possible.
“She’s okay. She slept most of the day, had a quick medical check-up because of her injuries on her legs, and has to deal with the shock.”
“Fuck. What injuries?”
“She was jerked out of the car, hit the driveway hard, and sustained a few bruises. But she’s fine. You should know her. She’s a little trooper, thinking positive because she can now go on with her life.”
“What about the guy? Is he behind bars?”
“I’d say so. They say they have enough evidence to pin the murder on him, definitely both assaults on Tiff, as well as the one on her father.” He paused. “I’d better go. It’s been a long day. Will I see you soon?”
The question threw him. Was that a request to come over? Or was he saying something between the lines? Or was Mat simply reading too much into the question? He looked up, trying to find the right words.
“She misses you,” Steve said before Mat was able to say anything.
“I miss her, too,” he confessed. “And it bugs the shit out of me that she had to go through this on her own.”