She tried not to grimace as the family began to eat. Luret shoved a plate at her; Lydee shook her head. — Corn cakes — the girl thought. — I know you don’t eat meat. And this is wine — She poured some into a cup.
Lydee sipped, not wanting to offend them, then nibbled at a cake. The red wine was robust and harsh; her teeth crunched against corn. Marellon was gulping his food, making sounds with his lips; he glanced at her as he was about to pick his teeth and put his hand in his lap. Luret gnawed at a chicken wing, cupping her hand as if trying to hide the repulsive sight.
— Silla is right about one thing — Lydee said. — I haven’t been able to help you —
— The Minds have spoken to us again — Kal thought.
— Perhaps They would have spoken anyway. The wall still stands — Lydee paused. — When I was in the desert, I directed my mind at the wall, and it shifted. I might have torn a hole in it with help —
Nenla put down her cup. — Are you so strong? —
— With the aid of the whole village, we might be able to tear it down together. My strength would be added to yours, and that might be enough —
Kal shook his head. — Even if we could, we wouldn’t be able to stand against all of Earth —
They finished the meal in silence. Lydee pushed her plate away, wondering if the food would make her sick; her stomach lurched. She fought the feeling with her mind, soothing herself. Kal and Nenla brushed against her with tendrils of thought; she felt their compassion.
— You aren’t like the other villagers — she said.
— No, we are not — She sensed some bitterness in Kal’s thoughts. His dark hair hung around his bearded face; he shook it back. — We too have fallen into separate ways. Some say we have listened to Daiya too much — He stood up and began to clear the cups and bowls from the table as Luret fetched the water bucket.
* * *
Lydee lay on a mat in the dark. In the hut’s other room, Nenla and Kal were sleeping, their dreams entwined. Occasionally a strand of thought escaped from behind their mental wall, allowing her to glimpse their minds’ embrace, a helix of jeweled bands.
Luret was asleep on a mat in one corner; Marellon was near the fireplace. Lydee stretched, trying to get comfortable. Her skin itched, and she dimly sensed the mechanical and instinctive minds of insects. She slapped at her arms and legs; now she would be infested, too.
Someone else was awake. She heard a rustling, then felt warm breath near her ear. — You’re still awake — Marellon thought.
— I’m not used to sleeping on a mat, and my mind is restless. I think of Silla and of all that Harel said. Your emotions are strong here, and disturbing —
— I am drawn to you, Lydee — He took her hand. — I don’t understand it. It seems my feelings have altered —
She put up her mental wall, leaving only a small opening.
— I know that you don’t see me in the same way, and maybe you never can. You still see only a savage with a weak body and unclean habits —
She drew her hand away. — Why are you telling me this, Marellon? —
— Because you would have seen it in me anyway. I am at the age when it’s time to choose a partner, yet I haven’t found one. Others draw away from Luret and from me because we seem unlike them. I thought that I had grown too different from others ever to feel love, and that my training with Daiya might have made me too solitary. But you’ve shown me I was wrong. I can feel love —
— You mustn’t feel that way about me —
— And why not? — he asked.
— Because I can never be your partner. I can never have children as your people do, and wouldn’t even if I could. I can’t stay here, and if I did, you would grow old while I remained young. Even without help from Homesmind and the comet, I would still live much longer than you —
— I ask nothing of you, Lydee. I only wanted to share my thoughts. It surprises me to feel this way about you —
— About one so strange — she said, picking up his uneasiness and embarrassment. His thoughts were turned in on themselves, as if he was trying to dim the glow shining at his center.
— Yes, you seemed strange at first. You seemed not to be human at all, and I saw you almost as a machine. Your mind was weaker then, and inside you an alien light glowed, as if another being lived there —
— Homesmind — she thought.
— But now I see your soul and know that it is like my own —
She suddenly wanted to reach out to him, but held back. Her strong feelings surprised her; she tried to tell herself that she was lonely and feeling only a momentary attraction. — You ask one person to cling to another until both are old and able to become Merging Selves —
— That’s true — he replied.
— On the Wanderer, we are always free to love many —
— Yet you see into no one’s mind —
— Yes —
— And you call that love? —
She thought of Pilo and Jerod, and her longing for her old life on the comet overwhelmed her. What would those boys, and Nara and Tila, think if they could see her now, lying on a mat in dirty clothes with Earth’s food in her belly, huddling near an Earthboy and able to feel some love for such a creature?
Marellon’s wall went up. — Do you think I would choose to feel this way about you, skydweller? I’m sorry I shared my thoughts with you. Don’t worry. I won’t inflict them on you again — His mind throbbed; she had wounded him.
— I’m sorry — she thought, knowing that would not make up for the hurt. He retreated to his own mat while she curled up and tried to sleep.
* * *
A clap of thunder awoke her. Lydee sat up, blinking. Light flashed through the hut’s openings and illuminated the doorway.
Someone screamed. Feet padded across the floor; as the lightning flashed again, she saw Kal’s broad form in the doorway.
She stood up and stumbled toward the entrance. People were running through the street toward the center of the village. Another cry pierced the air. She kept her mind closed, afraid to let the village’s panic flow into her. Kal hurried outside, followed by Nenla.
Marellon was near her. “What’s going on?” she said aloud.
— I don’t know — She could barely hear his thoughts. — The Merging Selves are calling to us —
Lydee stumbled outside. Several people were running through the fields toward her while the watchfires they had been tending flickered in the distance. Rain came swiftly, pouring from the sky in cold, sharp needles; the wind shrieked. Lightning forked across the heavens.
Slowly, she let down part of her shield. A thousand minds babbled, — The wall! The wall! — Through the villagers’ Net, she now sensed the force field and understood why they were afraid. The wall was inside the mountain range, a day’s travel closer to them on all sides. A few minds were already struggling to push it back.
She fell against one villager and was suddenly swept forward by the crowd. She closed her mind quickly. “Marellon!” she screamed, trying to free herself from the press of bodies. Losing her balance, she tripped and fell forward, clawing at the mud as feet trod on her back. She rolled toward a hut and staggered up, uninjured.
Marellon was running to her, Luret close behind him. Wind buffeted her, pushing her against the boy; the path was littered with thatching. They followed the stream of people, slipping in the mud as the rain drenched them.
The village’s public space was lighted. Several people stood in doorways or under booths, shielding their torches from the rain. Several Merging Selves, Cerwen among them, stood on tables in the center of the mob, their faces tense with effort as they pushed against the barrier.
“It’s gone!” a man cried triumphantly. Lydee clutched at the Net with her mind and abruptly sensed the barrier again; it was now on the other side of the river and closing in around the fields; the village would be crushed inside it. “No!” the same man screamed.
“Steady your m
ind!” a woman shouted.
Lydee added her strength to the villagers’, realizing how futile their effort was. The force field was now a wall around the edge of the town, cutting them off from the river and the fields.
She pushed. The field had stopped moving, though she was sure their feeble efforts had not halted its progress. Several Merging Selves had collapsed; others lifted them from the tables and laid them on the ground, trying to revive them. They were completely enclosed inside the village.
— We are locked here — Cerwen thought. Marellon trembled; Luret sagged against him. Lydee stood with them at the edge of the crowd, sensing their shock.
Gradually she became aware of another mind boring through the little other shield she had left. She turned. Most of the crowd was kneeling, clinging to one another for solace. Silla was standing, her shadowed eyes gazing directly at Lydee, her face yellowish-brown in the light.
“You brought this on us, skydweller.” Silla raised one arm and pointed. “You came into our village, and now the wall traps us here. I was right. You must die before we are freed.” Others stood up and moved closer to Silla.
— You are a fool — Marellon thought rashly. — The wall surrounded us before Lydee arrived. It could not have been her doing —
Lydee held her hands out, pleading silently with Cerwen. He was wavering, looking from her to his other granddaughter.
“Cerwen!” Lydee cried. “Let me add my strength to yours, and try to break this wall.” She did not trust herself to mindspeak, afraid that her thoughts would free themselves from her and lash out at Silla.
“We can’t break the wall,” Silla responded. “We have tried.”
“Don’t you understand? We must break it somehow.” She looked at Cerwen. “Daiya and Reiho are outside the wall now. If we don’t get to them, every mind outside the wall will be able to direct its force against them.”
10
Silla lifted one hand to her mouth, then turned toward Cerwen. — They are doomed — he said. — We cannot reach them —
“Maybe we can,” Lydee replied. “If I add my strength to yours, that might give us just enough power to break through. At least we can try.”
— How can we draw on the power we need? — one mind demanded; she recognized Brun. — Hasn’t the wall now cut us off from the mountains, the source of our power? —
Lydee frowned. “We cannot be cut off,” she said. “If we were, you would not be able to mindspeak at all.” Earth’s Minds were still helping them somehow. A more disturbing thought came to her; if the Mindcores could still reach them, then why hadn’t They broken the barrier? Why were They allowing the village to be subjected to this new threat?
Cerwen nodded, reading her thoughts. — We are asking ourselves these questions — he said. — Perhaps They have the power to open another channel to us, but cannot break the wall Themselves. I don’t know. They seem willing to let us suffer —
“I can answer your questions, skydweller,” Silla said; she had apparently touched Lydee’s mind even though she was still refusing to mindspeak. “We have been left our powers so that we may kill you more easily.”
— Please — Lydee called out with her mind. — We must try to break the wall and find Daiya and Reiho —
“And bring another cursed skydweller here? Let him die.”
— Daiya’s out there, too —
— What’s Daiya to us? — one burly man was thinking. — She is not part of the Net, and has lived outside the settlement communing with herself. Let her reap the harvest of her solitary ways —
— She’s your sister — Lydee said to Silla. — Do you care so little for her? —
“She’s probably dead,” Silla replied, but Lydee could tell that the young woman was uncertain. She directed her thoughts at the mire of guilt inside Silla; her jealousy had nearly swallowed her love for her sister, but there was still a little love left.
The rain fell more slowly, becoming a drizzle. The sky was growing lighter; a mist blurred the figures around Lydee.
Harel rose; beads of moisture gleamed on his beard and hair. — I’ll help you — he said. — I’ll try as hard as I can to help you break through the wall — He turned toward Silla. — And so will you. If you don’t I’ll leave our home and never touch your mind again —
Several people gasped at Harel’s threatened breach of custom. Silla held out a hand; her mind was raging, twisting in pain as her need for her partner contended with her fear of the skydweller.
— We must try to open the wall — Lydee said. — All of us, for every mind will be needed, and all of your wills. If we can tear a hole in it, I’ll go outside and search for my mentor and my sister. If your God and your Mindcores will it, then I’ll die out there, and you, Silla, will have your wish —
Silla lowered her eyes.
— Draw together — Cerwen thought. — Direct your minds at the wall. Lydee, you must go to the edge of the village, and we shall lend you our strength —
Brun and Anra were making their way through the crowd, elbowing those who were standing and stepping over the ones who were seated. — We’ll come with you — Brun said.
— You mustn’t — Lydee protested.
— You may need our help to shield you from harm — Anra murmured.
Brun waved a hand. — Our daughter is out there. She turned from us and brought us evil days, but she is still our child. We gave her life and will share her fate —
— I’ll go, too — Marellon thought.
— And I — Luret said. Kal cried out a protest; Nenla shook her head.
— No, Luret — Marellon said. — I am older and have a little more practice in mindcraft. If anything happens to me, at least my sister will have her child —
Luret shook her head. — If you don’t come back, we’ll all die behind this wall anyway — Her mother’s arms were already around her, holding her back.
— Go — Cerwen commanded. — Don’t waste your power in bickering. We must act now. If Daiya is still in this world, she will be draining herself of energy trying to stay alive —
* * *
Lydee ran along the muddy path toward the meadow, Marellon beside her. Anra and Brun were behind them, somehow managing to keep pace in spite of their age. Sparks danced in the air around them as the villagers gathered their strength.
They might be taking this risk for nothing; Daiya and Reiho might already be dead. Lydee suppressed her doubts, which would only blunt her ability to strike at the wall. She did not even know if a hole could be torn in the field; she tried not to think of that, either. She had to believe it was possible and remembered what she had been able to do to the wall alone in the desert.
They came to the edge of the village; her knee struck the invisible barrier. A fog hung over the meadow outside; Daiya’s hill was hidden behind nature’s misty wall. Lydee scowled; she had been hoping that they would find Daiya and Reiho near the force field, trying to find a way inside.
A hand gripped her shoulder; she glanced at Brun. Anra, the tallest among them, stood straight, staring at the wall as if she could pierce it with her eyes.
Lydee opened her mind, bracing herself against the wall with both hands. The villagers drew her into the Net; its bonds were heavy cables tying her to each mind. She pushed at the barrier, letting the power flow through her, trembling as she felt its force.
A spot began to glow around her hands. Heat seared her palms; she pulled her hands away, visualizing the atomic structures that held the field together. The wall was weakening; she summoned more power, directing it into the Net. Her link burned and her bones ached with the effort. The glowing spot grew larger.
She was at her limit and knew she had only enough strength left for one last push. Straining, she forced her mind at the wall, making a knife of her thoughts.
The wall ripped; wind slapped her face. She fell through the opening and rolled across the grass, striking a lump of dirt. The others followed, stumbling over her as she lay o
n the ground. She had exhausted herself; she could not move.
She threw up her mental shield quickly, sensing that her companions were doing the same. Marellon was beside her, lying on his back. She lifted her head. Anra and Brun lay face down; she was suddenly afraid the effort had been too much for them.
At last Brun moved, propping himself up on one elbow. She probed for his thoughts; he shook his head. “No, child. Don’t use your mind to speak. We must shield ourselves thoroughly so that no one knows we are outside.” She felt as though something was poised over her and imagined a hammer about to pound her into the ground. Quickly, she thrust the image from her, afraid her own thoughts would turn against her.
Marellon stirred; his strength was returning. She fed him some of her power, then lent more to Anra. The older people were badly weakened; Brun’s shield seemed thin.
“The wall has mended itself,” Brun whispered. He and Anra were cut off from the other Merging Selves and the Net. They would need some of her power, and she had little to give.
They were still alive, at least. Either the Earthfolk on this side of the wall had not yet sensed their presence or they were waiting until those who had broken through grew too tired to resist. They would have sensed a rip in their wall, she was sure, but might be too far away to notice four small, shielded minds. Lydee began to hope.
She stood up. Their shields were stronger now; if they could keep them up, no one would be able to sense their presence. Now they would have to get to the hill; they could not even search with mental strands to find out if Reiho and Daiya were still alive.
Reaching out, she helped Anra to her feet. The woman held on to her tightly and seemed about to speak, but did not. Brun leaned against Marellon.
“Are you ready?” Lydee asked. Brun nodded. “Then we must go.”
* * *
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