“Sort of,” the boy answered evasively.
“Mm.” Keir mulled that comment over before asking, “If it was the same crap, why didn’t you ignore him?”
Agitated, Adam admitted in a tone rough with anxiety, “Because he kept saying bad things, and I couldn’t let him get away with it.”
“What kind of bad things? About you?” Keir asked. He took his eyes off the road to glance in the rearview mirror at his son huddled against the back door.
Up to this point Ryan had stayed out of the conversation. The pain in Adam’s eyes unnerved her. A shadow of alarm touched her heart. There was much more to this story. Ryan felt it.
She glanced at Keir. His closed, guarded features increased her misgivings.
She touched Keir’s arm, drawing his attention away from the child. “Why don’t you let it go for now?” she asked.
Keir shook his head. “Can’t. I need to get to the bottom of this. That’s the only way I’m going to get it sorted out. If Lakeisha is behind Malcolm’s remarks, then I’ve got to get my facts right so I can talk to her and Shannon.”
Ryan tried another approach, lowering her voice so only Keir could hear her. “Adam’s really upset. A lot has happened today. Give him a little bit of time to recover. You don’t have to talk to Lakeisha today.”
“No,” Keir vetoed. “I need to sort this out now.”
There wasn’t much she could do. Ryan turned to Adam and mouthed the words, “I’m sorry.”
“Adam, what kind of junk did Malcolm say?” asked Keir.
The boy squirmed in his seat. Finally, he said, “He said stuff about us!”
“Us? Like what?” asked Keir.
Shaking his head, Adam scrunched up his little face, and his eyes darted in Ryan’s direction. A wave of apprehension swept through her, turning her stomach into knots.
“Stop pussyfooting around and tell me,” Keir demanded. His eyes darkened with anger. “I’m not going to punish you. You didn’t do anything wrong. I want to put the blame exactly where it belongs. I believe it belongs on Lakeisha and her son. Nothing can be done until you tell me everything.”
This story was far from complete. In the months Ryan had known both of the Southhall children, they had never raised a hand at each other or at anyone else. The pair teased, but a malicious word never left their lips. Whatever happened between Malcolm and Adam had pushed the boy to the breaking point. He was not the kind of child to instigate a fight for the fun of causing a ruckus or being the center of attention.
From the expression on Keir’s face, ferreting out the information wasn’t improving his mood. He wanted answers, and Adam’s responses were not dampening Keir’s frustration, they were adding to it.
“Adam?” Keir prompted. The stern note in his voice sent a chill coursing through Ryan.
Grimacing, Adam quickly turned away. He tied and untied his baseball mitt’s loose strings into knots. Finally, he answered. “Mal kept saying bad things about Ryan.”
“Ryan?” Keir repeated.
Ryan gasped. What could Malcolm possibly know about her? And the more important question, why would he talk about her?
“What did he say?” she asked.
Adam’s head hung, and his cheeks turned red. “I don’t want to say.”
“It’s okay,” Keir assured him. “Tell us.”
“Malcolm called Ryan a b-b-bitch,” said Adam. He hesitated over the next part. “Like a prostitute.”
Embarrassment flushed Ryan’s face beet red. Appalled, she turned toward the window so that they couldn’t see her. Ohmigod. Why would a kid talk like that about someone he didn’t know?
Keir reached across the transmission gear and touched Ryan’s arm. “You okay?”
Nodding, she continued to stare out the window. She didn’t want him or the kids to see the tears swimming in her eyes.
Whispering softly so that the kids didn’t hear him, Keir assured her, “This is not your fault. Don’t think it is.”
Now that Adam had made his confession, the words practically spilled from his lips. “Malcolm said Ryan broke up you and Mom.”
Keir’s hands were clenched tight around the steering wheel, but he spoke calmly. “Adam, you know that’s not true. Your mother and I were divorced before I met Ryan.”
“I know. He made me mad,” replied Adam. “Malcolm called Ryan a home wrecker. And that’s why you and Mom can’t get back together. Ryan keeps you apart.”
Awakening from her nap, Emily added, “He don’t know anything about our family.”
“Honey, you’re right. Sometimes people make up cruel things to hurt you,” Keir explained to the little girl. “That’s what Malcolm did to Adam. He wanted to make him feel bad so that he’d mess up when it was his turn at bat.”
“Malcolm’s stupid,” the girl stated. “He never comes to our house. How does he know anything about us?”
Grinning, Keir responded, “Exactly. Think Adam. He knows nothing about us.”
But Lakeisha does. Either she said those things to her son or to someone else, and he heard her. Home wrecker? Ryan thought. Keir and Shannon had made several attempts to make their marriage work before divorcing last year.
“Is that why you went after him?” asked Keir.
“Yeah,” Adam answered softly.
“Malcolm doesn’t know jack about our family. It’s obvious that he was making things up. Don’t let him or the things he said get to you. Besides, they’re only words, and you shouldn’t let anyone bring out your anger that way,” said Keir. “But I understand how you felt. I don’t want anyone saying cruel things about Ryan, you, or your sister. Especially, if they’re untrue.”
They were silent for a moment, and then Keir said, “Thank you for defending her.”
“Your welcome,” murmured Adam.
“From now on, when someone makes cruel remarks like that, talk to the umpire, team manager, or come to me. Don’t let things boil over or take them into your own hands. When you do, the situation could end like it happened today. Think, Adam. You may not be allowed back on the team,” said Keir.
“But, Dad—”
“No. Son, listen to me.” Keir waved away Adam’s objections. “Defending Ryan was a good thing. But, it cost you three games and possibly your part in the championship. Let an adult handle it. Do you understand me?”
“Yeah,” muttered Adam.
“Good,” said Keir.
Throughout the exchange, Ryan sat quietly, staring out the window. Name-calling and lies didn’t bother her. Using Adam to hurt her and Keir did. He was just a little boy trying to have some fun. He didn’t deserve that.
Keir glanced Ryan’s way as he stroked her cheek. “Ry?”
“Hmm?” Ryan whispered.
“Are you all right?”
She nodded.
Keir’s hand found hers and linked them together. “Want to tell me what you’re thinking?”
What exactly was she thinking? She wasn’t sure. This should not have happened. He was a child trying to enjoy a game. Instead, Malcolm had subjected Adam to the taunts and lies of another. Lies specifically designed to hurt him. No child deserved to be treated that way.
Keir’s gentle voice penetrated the fog of pain she felt. “Don’t let this upset you,” he said. “It’s the cruel gossip of someone who doesn’t know us. Please don’t let it stress you out. We’ll get everything figured out together.”
Nodding, she sat silently, replaying Malcolm’s vicious words in her head. She came to one conclusion. Something had to be done, and she was the person who had to do it.
Chapter 30
Keir turned off the lamp and switched on the night-light. He brushed the hair away from Emily’s sleeping face. Grinning, he leaned close and kissed her cheek. “Good night, baby.”
Satisfied his little princess was out for the night, Keir tiptoed out of the room and gently shut the bedroom door before moving across the hall to Adam’s room. After peeking at his son, Keir felt secure
in the knowledge that both children were fast asleep after devouring two large pepperoni pizzas and a liter of orange soda.
Drawing in a large gulp of air, Keir headed for the stairs. Now the real work began.
Ryan needed his full attention. Although she tried to hide it, he knew today’s events had shaken her to her core. Keir didn’t want Ryan obsessing over the incident. His tenderhearted woman took everything so personally.
He entered the kitchen and found her stuffing the empty pizza boxes into the trash. “Hey,” he muttered, with a smile. “You didn’t have to do that.”
“No problem.”
“Thanks.”
“Are the kids asleep?” Ryan folded the dish towel in half and returned it to the counter to dry.
“Dead to the world.” He moved close and wrapped his arms around her shoulders and swayed back and forth, gazing into her troubled brown eyes. “How about you? Are you all right?”
“I’m okay. Just a little tired.” She held him close, with a hand around his waist.
Brushing a gentle finger across her bangs, he kissed her forehead. “Let’s chill out awhile before you head home.”
“Okay.”
Keir led her to the entertainment room. She sat gingerly on the edge of the sofa and waited for him to take his place next to her. “Want a glass of wine?” he asked.
“Nah. I’ve got to drive home. I’m fine.”
Nodding, he sank into the spot beside her and rested his arm loosely around her shoulders. Her body felt like a board against him. Tension radiated from her. A quick and disturbing thought entered his mind. Ryan was psyching herself up to tell him something major. Keir glanced at the closed, uncompromising expression on her face and clenched his hand into a fist along the back of the sofa. Whatever she planned to say, Keir felt certain he wasn’t going to like it.
Never one to back down from a fight, Keir decided to meet this crisis head on. With a little finesse, he might be able to defuse the situation. “What’s on your mind?”
Surprised, Ryan’s lips parted. “Am I that obvious?”
Amused, he planted a quick kiss on her lips, admitting, “Only to people who know you. Come on. Care to tell me what’s going on in your head?”
“My mom,” she stated softly.
Thrown to the left by her comment, Keir shook his head. “What?”
“While I was putting away the pizza, I thought of my mother and the way she raised my brother, sister, and me. How she believed every child deserved a good start in life.”
Okay, now he was nervous. Ryan’s topic of the conversation confused him. A flutter of uneasiness surged through him. Although she’d opened up more about her past, Ryan didn’t make trips down memory lane without a reason. When he’d sat down next to her, Keir had fully expected Ryan to talk about Adam and the fight between the boys. No way had he been expecting a discussion about her childhood and her mother.
“No matter what happened around us, my mother always made sure we were untouched, protected from the bad things going on in the world,” she said. Her faint smile held a hint of sadness. Ryan’s words were softly uttered, but an ominous quality surrounded them. “I believe whatever happens in your childhood colors the rest of your life. Mom believed strongly, almost obsessively, that every child deserved a good start.”
Lost regarding what Ryan wanted him to understand, he remained quiet. As long as she talked, it gave him an opportunity to glean her thoughts. Hopefully, that would help him plot out a course of action that would counter Ryan’s plans.
“When I was about three, a new family moved on our block. The couple had two kids, a boy about eight and a daughter of about four or five.” A tiny smile came and went on her lips. “It’s been so long, I don’t remember their names.” Forehead wrinkled into a frown, she dismissed the thought with a wave of her hand. “That’s not important. Domestic violence surfaced between the parents soon after they settled in. And then signs emerged that the boy might take after his father. He kept bullying his younger sister. Jealousy fueled his anger. I remember a couple of times, my mom mentioned her concerns to the wife. The woman refused to listen and accept responsibility for it.”
Ryan paused, fidgeting with her fingers.
Keir waited, wondering what he could do to turn this around. Ryan’s ramblings didn’t offer any insights into what road she planned to take them down.
“Anywho, when nothing changed,” Ryan continued, “my mother refused to let me play with them because she felt they were a bad influence for a three-year-old. Mom believed in removing us from any unpleasant environment. She didn’t want that negative attitude around her children.”
“Ry,” Keir prompted, touching her hand.
She shook it off before continuing. “There were a few situations like that while I was growing up. But my mom always took charge and immediately pulled me from the bad stuff.” Her voice broke miserably. “My life is filled with good memories. She made sure of that.”
Listening, with growing dismay, Keir sought a way to comfort Ryan.
Swallowing loudly, she stated thickly, “Emily and Adam have been through a lot.”
Okay. This conversation kept going all over the board. He couldn’t keep up. What new torture was Ryan planning to inflict on him?
“What do you mean?” he asked.
“They’ve suffered through the breakup of your marriage. A divorce. And they’re shuffled between your and your ex-wife’s homes. That’s a lot for kids to handle.”
“Don’t worry about them. They’re doing well. All their needs are taken care of and most of their wants.”
She patted his thigh reassuringly. “I know. I’m not criticizing.”
“What are you saying?”
Ryan turned on the sofa, facing him. “Keir, don’t be upset. This is not about you and me. It’s about your children. Adam and Emily need your protection. And to do that, it’s up to me to step out of the picture.”
The uneasiness that had plagued him since entering the kitchen surged into panic. “No. Stop. Listen to me. They don’t need to be protected from you. Emily and Adam love you.”
Tears glittered in her eyes, and her voice quivered. “Yes, they do.”
“Doesn’t it count for anything?”
“More than you know. And that’s why we have to end this.”
Keir threw his hand in the air. “No. We’re not going down that road a second time. I refuse to accept that.”
“You can’t deny it. This is a far cry from what I want from you. Keir, I love you and don’t want to leave you.”
“Then don’t. And I love you,” he added.
“It doesn’t matter how we feel. Your kids have to come first. They deserve a good start in life. Emily and Adam need the stability and security that you can’t offer them with me in the picture. It’s time for me to leave.”
It’s time to take charge of this situation. Make Ryan realize that she’s not responsible for what happened today. None of this is her fault, he thought. “What we encountered today could have happened any day. Don’t take on a situation you didn’t instigate. Lakeisha fed her son a bunch of crap, and he bought it. It’s not your fault.”
“I know. My being around doesn’t help the situation. Your kids need your attention full time. Your loyalties are divided with me being around. Concentrate on them.”
Desperate to make her understand, he held her hands between both of his and tugged until she looked at him. “No. No. No. You’re wrong. You’re a big part of their lives. How do you think they’ll react when they find out that you don’t want to be around them anymore?”
“It’ll hurt at first. But after a while the kids will be fine. If you do your job, it’ll all work out.”
Sighing heavily, Ryan rose from the sofa and dug in her pants pocket for her keys. She left the room and started down the marble hallway to the front entrance. A sense of helplessness and terror raced through Keir as he followed Ryan out the door and down the front walkway. Panicking,
he reached for her, saying the first thing that came to him. “You can’t do this. We’ve gone through so much to get to this point. Think about that.”
Ryan allowed him to pull her into his arms, holding him as if she’d never planned to let him go. “I love you,” she whispered and then backed away and climbed into her car. Seconds later, she pulled out of the driveway and drove the car out of the gated community.
Keir tossed and turned most of the night. Around four he gave up and climbed out of the bed. Although it would be hours before the kids stirred, he needed to do something. He ambled into the kitchen and made a strong pot of coffee and took a cup into the great room.
Keir stood in the center of the room, looking at the furniture Ryan and he had chosen. That Sunday afternoon seemed so far away. They’d laughed and teased each other, enjoying their time together. After everything had been said and done, they had made the selection for this room as a couple, like a family.
He chuckled softly, remembering how Ryan insisted they try out each piece of furniture. It had been one hell of a ride. She was an essential part of his life. Keir didn’t know what he would do without her.
Shutting his eyes, Keir relived the last moment Ryan had been in his home. With a heavy heart, he shook his head, turned out the lights, and returned to the kitchen. Ryan’s presence lived in every room of this house. How had that little woman stamped herself so completely in every nook? After all, they’d only been together a few months.
I’ll get her back, he vowed. All he needed to do was give her a little space and time to think the situation through. Ryan loved him, and she’d come back. There were other issues to deal with. What should he tell his kids?
The truth always worked best. Kids smelled a lie quicker than a prosecuting attorney.
Keir checked out the contents of his refrigerator and cabinets. Sausage and French toast might keep them occupied so they wouldn’t ask too many questions. Keir chuckled. He could hope.
Emily would be the one to question her father. She loved Ryan and would expect to see her.
Although Ryan refused to stay overnight when the kids were visiting, she always returned for breakfast, or they packed in the car and went to her house. She never missed a meal because she loved his cooking.
Now Until Forever Page 20