Die By the Drop: Shivers and Sins Volume 1

by Kaia Bennett

  I got out of the car on shaky legs. At the ringing tap on metal, I turned to find a warning glare pinning me over the hood.

  “Evie.”

  I lifted my chin then turned on my heel. “I won’t run. I’m too tired tonight.” I threw the words over my shoulder.

  He snorted, but I caught the hint of a smile when I glanced over my shoulder and watched him stalk to the trunk. I wish I could have smiled back, but the sweetness in his face unnerved me. Just the day before, I’d watched him and his friends rape and murder a twisted gaggle of whipping boys and girls, procured for my punishment. I couldn’t reconcile those vampires with the one I’d shared a vision of the past with in the woods as he mourned his friend. The beast snarled in my head. Behind her, the cage was now filled to bursting with the people I’d seen die. Girls, boys. Lost hope and lost lives. The bars of the cage closed tight. After all the hard work I’d put into opening them.

  Inside the house, my nightmare gave way to a dream.

  How the fuck are a bunch of unemployed vampires able to afford this?

  I felt filthy walking through the modern, yet rustic kitchen. Pristine hardwood floors and gorgeous pewter countertops greeted me. Shimmering gray cabinets and stainless steel appliances combined to create the cover of a décor magazine. The living room on the other side of the open kitchen had a stone fireplace and boasted gray leather couches. Windows so tall and wide they served as a glass wall overlooked a lake not visible from the driveway. The house lights were on, but set to a warm glow, like someone expected us.

  In shock, I climbed the wooden staircase, my fingers sliding over the glass railing as I stared up at the second floor. I stumbled onto the landing and trudged past splashes of red—blooming flower paintings, thank God. They could’ve been mistaken for blood. I moved down the pristine hallway, ruing my dirty boots and bloody, grime-covered legs. My borrowed black leather jacket was ashen, thanks to dirt, leaves, and the rough landing from the accident.

  I wondered if Jesse and his crew had killed whoever owned this home. Someone would come looking when they realized the owners were dead. Maybe that would be a chance to escape? A thought I tossed out to appease the guilty conscience caged in my mind.

  But then, how had Jesse known the garage code? The house had been painstakingly kept clean. No dust that I could see. I was the dirtiest thing to walk in here in quite some time. Which meant, the house had to belong to Jesse, not to some poor unsuspecting couple killed by vampires for a semi-permanent party zone.

  I had so many questions, but they all took a backseat as I stared at the bathroom.

  If the parts of the house I saw were a dream, the bathroom looked like God’s waiting room.

  A rain shower built of coral stone tiles sat to one side, a huge standalone tub on the other side of the wall. Several shower heads and recessed lighting lured me forward like a siren song, the shower so wide and deep, no door had been installed.

  I’m not sure if I know how to turn the fucking thing on, but I’ll find out and then I’ll never leave.

  I stripped off my clothes, and grabbed a towel and washcloth from the heated towel rack. I stepped into a shower stocked with gleaming bottles of body wash, shampoo, and conditioner. Soothing musk and green tea made me close my eyes and inhale when I tested the scents in the bottles. I managed to find the right setting. A waterfall enveloped me from all sides, with enough steam to melt the cold from my marrow. But, while the water warmed me, darkness stirred in my mind. The waterfall reminded me of Tennessee. When I closed my eyes to wash the leaves and dirt from my hair I envisioned tear-streaked faces. Futile struggle. I saw blood and I heard screams and I hated myself for even a moment’s respite from my guilt, for my complicity in those deaths.

  None of those people could lasso a vampire with their minds. I hadn’t done enough to save them. In fact, if I hadn’t spent most of my life denying my gift unless my abilities suited me, I might’ve been able to do more than watch.

  Or kill.

  I kept my eyes open as much as I could to combat the truth, washing with hard strokes until Jesse strolled into the bathroom. The thud of his boots on the floor and the roving glance he gave my naked body scared me, as if this were the first time in the motel a week ago.

  A lifetime ago.

  He studied me while I rubbed a soapy cloth over my chest and pretended to ignore his lingering stare. The way his eyes touched every sudsy part of me, as though his gaze was his hands, made my legs wobble. My core clenched when he stepped in behind me and the heat of his body surrounded me in a way water couldn’t.

  Warm water cascaded down our bodies and blood flowed from between my legs and swirled in the suds like peppermint candy, disappearing down the drain. I placed my cloth in a one of the cubbies set in the stone, squeezed some shampoo into my hands, and turned to face him. I ran my fingers over Jesse’s hair, rubbing the pearly liquid into his scalp while he leaned his head back. The contented groan he released when I rinsed the suds echoed off the stone walls and inside my throbbing pussy. Jesse raked conditioner toward the waist-length tips of his hair, while I squirted the body wash onto his cloth. My mouth watered as I stared at his naked body, all the places my hands were about to touch.

  You’re disgusting, one of the captives in my mind whispered. She looked like Michelle now, only her eyes were dead white, wide and angled in her round face. Without her glasses, phantom Michelle’s eyes took up so much space, I couldn’t escape her accusatory stare. I remembered her wet hair when I pulled her out of the pool. Her ultimate fate had been far worse than lungsful of water.

  I’d grown still and drawn Jesse’s attention. He opened his eyes, no longer the black eyes of a vampire. These were the nut-brown eyes that could trick even a witch who knew better into thinking him human. I looked away and went back to scrubbing his beautiful body.

  I let everything within me go quiet, locking up my humanity and my heart, and hiding the key. I tended to my captor, rubbing foam over his entire body. From the muscles in his throat, to the threads of sinewy muscle in his defined shoulders, to his thick biceps and veined forearms. I rubbed circles over his firm chest and across dusky nipples.

  The soft peaks pebbled under my touch, and I took my time caressing each abdominal muscle that stood out in sharp relief. I massaged the cut of his hips, his cock and the tightening balls beneath. I knelt to scrub his legs, tracing the lines of his powerful thighs through the cloth. Then I stood, so I could drag the cloth over the wide expanse of shoulder muscles while he braced his hands on the wall. His back flexed, his ass dimpled and tensed when I massaged the taut muscles and the crevice within. Done with my task, I rinsed and placed the cloth in another empty cubby. He pulled me to him, pressed my back to the wall and bracketed my body with his arms.

  When Jesse kissed me, I kissed him back. My nipples hardened under his hands as he caressed my breasts. His cock flexed in my hand, hot and full to bursting with that drill-like density. He never ceased to melt my defenses and unearth every hidden climax. I doubted this time would be different.

  He spun me. I mimicked his earlier pose, placing my hands on the shower wall. Letting my eyes drift closed, I arched as he slid into my pussy with one torturous lunge. I muffled my shout, gripping my bottom lip in a vice with my teeth.

  He fucked me, slow and relentless, savoring another flavor of my destruction. This was the opposite of my frantic unraveling when Liam and Vaughn had been witnesses. I gritted my teeth when he slid the thick pads of his fingertips over my hard clit, rolling my hips in time with his caress.

  His deep strokes into my cunt had me shivering in mere minutes. The tension built, the flush under my skin made me sweat, even as the water rinsed me clean. He pinched the small bud and I exploded around him, squeezing his shaft in a vice grip.

  My legs quaked and threatened to give out, but he held me aloft, not yet done with my body. I panted against my raised forearm. I chased the vision we’d shared in the woods. I chased an excuse to feel this good wh
en a killer touched me, but I felt nothing of the past, nothing of the vision, or the tender trance.

  I felt the here and now, Jesse’s hands on my curves, the flood of pleasure I couldn’t pretend belonged to anyone but me. My nails scraped the slick tile. I felt drugged and strange, as if I were falling. Falling into an alternate universe where everything and everyone I’d known before this moment had been a mirage.

  I used to clench a tree like this, in the woods outside Guthridge when Manny fucked me. I used to be Manny’s. Manny used to be mine. Now who am I? What am I? A vampire’s pet? A witch? A murderer?

  Manny. Somewhere out there, Manny lived and breathed, my bond to him severed forever. And here I stood, shivering in the arms of the creature who’d taken me from him.

  I opened my eyes, my stare focused through the wall and beyond this world. My body rocked forward and back as Jesse fucked me faster, his own release spiraling into me, coating me within as he shouted and shivered around me. He nipped my shoulder, my neck, but didn’t bite. He didn’t want my blood, just my skin shivering under his lips.

  Maybe I died on the forest floor after all. Maybe I did a deal with the devil and this is the cost.

  When Jesse pulled out, we rinsed off and he stepped out first. He threw me my towel, which I promptly got bloody, but thankfully, I didn’t have a single cramp. I had a hunch my cycle would come to an end sooner than usual, the blood already dulling in shade and not as copious as usual for the first day.

  “I put our bags in the bedroom down the hall to the left,” Jesse said, nodding in the direction I was to go. He went to work rubbing his hair dry and didn’t meet my eyes. “Go get some rest. I’ll be there in a while.”

  Tiredness seeped into my bones as the events of the day and Jesse’s use of my body caught up to me. I left him alone in the bathroom and entered the room.

  A master bedroom. I noted the gorgeous space with mute awe, especially the California king bed I wanted to bury myself in. The gray theme carried over with a fluffy white area rug and monochrome still photography. Black and white and splashes of red.

  I had a million questions about this house, about Jesse, but fatigue permitted me just enough energy to prepare for bed. I dragged my bag into the master bath. I inserted a tampon, put on lotion, and dried my hair as much as I could before braiding my curls and tying a wrap around my head.

  “How domestic,” I muttered. I could’ve been back in my old bed—if not for the vampire.

  Of course I had no sleeping clothes in my bag. Unless I slept in whatever car they’d stolen, I usually slept naked, cradled in Jesse’s arms.

  For the first time I had leave to go to bed alone, to stand in a room alone. I checked the closet and drawers. To my shock, clothes filled the drawers, neatly stacked. Clothes for a man and a woman. I narrowed my eyes and wondered who the women’s clothes belonged to.

  I chose an oversized men’s t-shirt instead of a negligee, turned off the lights, and slid into bed.

  Even alone, I acted like a well-trained captive, curled up on one side of the bed, waiting for an imposing body to enter my space.

  I woke only when I felt the bed move.

  Jesse didn’t touch me and soon his breathing found a steady rhythm. I had a strange sense of loss, but, numbed by fatigue, I couldn’t pinpoint the source.

  When I dreamed, I dreamed of Jesse sitting at the head of a banquet table opposite me. A shadow loomed at his back. Shaded hands clutched his broad shoulders, digging in and drawing blood.

  In the air, his mother’s lullaby sounded. Above us, the blue sky stretched out endlessly, streaked with sunlight.

  For the first time since all of this began, I woke alone in bed to a burst of sunlight. The windows in this room echoed the living room downstairs, taking up a whole wall and overlooking a balcony. The view was of the lake, as well as a wooded path and the top of a boathouse. I padded across the rug, onto hardwood, and stared across the sparkling water. I caught sight of my reflection, my weary eyes, and skewed head scarf. I unraveled the scarf and undid the braids underneath, finger combing my curls into waves.

  “Unbelievable,” I muttered.

  “Nope. Just a pretty view. The world is full of them.” I whirled to see Jesse leaning against the doorjamb. He wore black jeans and a navy blue long-sleeved shirt. He trained his gaze on my face, then the length of my body.

  “My shirt looks good on you.”

  I rubbed sleep from my eyes, so I wouldn’t have to meet his hungry stare.

  “How do a bunch of broke vampires afford this place? Why the motels? Why travel at all?”

  “Why not?”

  I sighed. “We’re back to your infuriating habit of answering a question with a question?”

  “Looks like. How are you feeling?” He stepped into the room, only to stumble to an awkward halt by the bed. He made a vague gesture toward my belly. Shocked, I stared down my body, touched my tummy, and then looked at him.

  He’s weirdly sympathetic—for a murderer—this morning.

  “Fine.” When I assessed my cramps, I realized I didn’t have any pain. No bloating, no fatigue, no knot at the base of my spine. “Usually, I have to pop a handful of Advil just to get out of bed, but this time I don’t hurt. I might even be done. Or just about.”

  “Hmm.” I couldn’t tell if he looked worried or sad, but his brow furrowed.

  A twinge of panic hit me. Could vampire blood alter even the delicate balance of my cycle? I thought back to the farmhouse.

  Can I get pregnant?

  The glint in Jesse’s eyes when he teased me.

  Yes. No. Maybe.

  You wanna have my babies, witch? Or you just want more of my cock?

  I swallowed.

  “Why am I almost done, though? Is that your blood messing with my period, or something else?”

  “What is it with you and babies? I’m not human, Evie.” Jesse frowned and shook his head. “I’m a different species. A predator. I can’t get a human pregnant.”

  “I’m not human.” For the first time I said the words out loud. “I’m a witch.”

  Jesse smiled. “Different name, similar blueprint. I can’t breed with prey.”

  I sighed, though not exactly in relief.

  He’ll probably go back to biting me to get his fix. I should remind him how good I can be when he’s kind like he was yesterday.

  “How are you? Did you sleep?”

  Jesse perched on the edge of the bed, braced his elbows on his knees with his dangling hands clasped between them. He didn’t meet my eyes, so I had free range of his gorgeous profile. “Yes. I shouldn’t have been able to, but I slept and I dreamed of.... I haven’t had a dream in years.”

  I stood speechless. An emotionally confused vampire was quite a sight.

  “I should kill you. I should drain you and toss you in the lake and be done with this.”

  A tremor, fine as silk, traveled the length of my body. He seemed to be in deep thought. I wondered if he’d come here, thinking he’d kill me, or if he had plans to hold on to me longer. I couldn’t be the only one conflicted about what had transpired between us.

  “You could save yourself the time and the cleanup bill if you set me loose. Let me go home.”

  He looked up then, fixing me with an incredulous stare. Pure nonsense that never crossed his mind before, I was sure. Of course not. I should be dead. Hanging onto me for an extended time had never been part of his plan.

  Neither was falling for you, the beast whispered. There are many ways to fight. You chose your weapons wisely. Don’t lay them down now.

  He won’t let you live. He can’t let you live.

  He shook his head and looked away. “Even humans don’t operate that way. Releasing captives who live to tell the tale is bad for business.”

  “Who would I tell about any of this?” I took a step toward him. “Vampires? Witches? No one I know, including me, had any idea those existed until you took me.”

  “The world is much bigg
er than your hometown. And your hometown is full of people who would believe you. You’re dangerous alive and free.”

  I hurried to stand in front of him. When he looked up, I whispered, “Please don’t kill me. I wouldn’t betray you if you let me go. I’ve seen too much, done too much, to think that would be a good idea.”

  “Evie….”

  I reached for the bracelet around my wrist, touching it in remembrance.

  “I don’t wear this because it’s pretty. It’s not a kill trophy. I wear it because… because the girl I killed should be wearing it instead.” I swallowed the lump in my throat. “I killed someone, Jesse. I took a life with my own hands. I know that means nothing to you, but it means everything to me. It means everything.”

  He reached for my arm, stroked the bracelet, and then my wrist underneath. The skin tingled to life, trained to receive his touch with zeal, like the rest of me. He felt my pulse quicken under his fingertips and gave me a smug grin I didn’t return. His effect on my body wasn’t something my mind accepted without a fight.

  “It’s not just your secrets I have to keep, Jesse. I have my own. I have secrets I never want another living soul to know.”

  My time in a mental hospital loomed in my past. Orange jumpsuits loomed in my future. I took a step away from Jesse’s touch, but he didn’t let me out of his grasp.

  “You’re too human for your own good, Evie. Your guilt over killing weaker creatures is pedestrian as fuck. You think leopards feel guilt for stalking and enjoying their meat?”

  “I think if the leopard could feel the pain their prey feels, they would. That moment of terror, the last breath before their eyes go cold? Yes, they’d feel guilt. I think you would, too.”

  “All I feel is hard. You’re describing everything that gets me off, next to your sweet pussy, and your even sweeter blood.”

  I shivered as his pupils dilated a fraction. His tongue swiped his lips and before I could stop myself my own tongue echoed the movement, slicking my lips for his kiss.