by Mari Carr
“Then you took up with her friend Hayley,” Ben added, “and I felt like odd man out. I know both of you adore your wives, but the fact is Jack, people do talk about them. They don’t think or behave as is expected of women.”
“Because they were raised nearly two hundred years in the future. And what a future,” Jack exclaimed. “I can’t tell you how many times I’ve wished I was the one to make the trip through time. The stories Hayley and Erin have told us about the things to come, the songs they’ve taught us, the inventions that will be created. Did you know people could fly in the future? In this amazing device called an airplane. It’s all so incredible. How I wish I could see it.”
“So you truly believe their claim?” Ben asked, still uncertain.
“Ben, I’ve seen it,” Jack replied.
“Seen it?”
“I was there when Hayley made her leap through the tree. Alex was there when Erin made the trip as well. I’m sorry you couldn’t be there for Tori. It sounds as though her journey was particularly violent.”
“She was injured,” he answered. “I thought she’d been beaten by some attacker. She lost her memory when she hit her head on a rock.”
“According to Hayley, the trip isn’t an easy one. I’m not even sure how to describe it. Hayley tried once to explain that it was a bit like being caught in a cyclone, thrashed about like a rag doll, completely helpless to the rough elements with nothing to hold on to or to keep you pinned to the earth. Erin told Alex that childbirth was simple compared to the journey through the tree.”
“Why?” Ben asked after several silent moments. “Why were they sent here?”
Jack shook his head. “I stopped asking why. Now all I do is thank my lucky stars every day that Hayley’s here. I don’t know what force brought her here, but I know there is no force on earth that will make me relinquish her. She’s as vital to me as the air I breathe.”
Closing his eyes, Ben considered his friend’s words. “Vee means the same to me,” he replied quietly. “I’ve never met anyone quite like her. Her inner strength, her loving nature, her kind spirit, her vitality. She’s truly remarkable.”
Jack smiled. “Hayley and Erin have spoken of her often, although I don’t think they see this inner strength you speak of. In fact, I suspect they were actually Tori’s self-appointed guardians in their time. I know Hayley was shocked beyond words when Tori crashed into this cabin yesterday, hell-bent on rescuing them.”
“She was strong from the beginning,” Ben replied. “She woke up in a strange bed to see this grim, miserable face hovering over her and all she did was smile and say hello.”
Ben grinned as he remembered her innocent, endearing conversation that night. From the first moment they’d met, it seemed she had seen right through him. Found a window to his soul, he didn’t know existed. “You know as well as I that most of polite society would run in fear of my glowering visage.”
“You are too hard on yourself,” Jack replied. “I know the years since the war haven’t been particularly easy for you. You chose a difficult path. I can’t imagine how unseemly your work with Bow Street must have been.”
Ben reared back, shocked.
“Yes,” Jack added, in response to Ben’s unasked question. “Alex and I knew what you were doing. Your father did as well.”
“My father?” Ben was stunned to discover his dark secret was not so dark.
“I doubt there’s much that gets by the Duke of Pelsham. It was he who told Alex and me. I think he was rather at a loss as to how to reach you. He hoped we would be able to persuade you to give up the dangerous work.”
“I don’t recall either of you attempting to stop me. In fact, until this moment, I didn’t know any of you were aware of my actions.”
Jack grimaced. “That was my fault. We convinced the duke that returning from war was hard and that your work for Bow Street was giving your life a purpose, filling a void that needed filling. I know you despise the ton as much as I do. I had the shipping company to keep me going. Alex had the marquisate. I figured working with Bow Street was keeping you sane.”
“Sane,” he whispered, before quickly asking, “And that convinced my father not to interfere?”
“I suppose so,” Jack admitted. “He realized you would never be able to embrace the ton and all its silly strictures.”
“And he wasn’t worried about his reputation?”
“No,” Jack answered. “I don’t believe he was a bit concerned about any scandal that would follow should your work be discovered. I suspect he was even proud of you.”
“Oh,” Ben was genuinely surprised. His father took his title and responsibilities very seriously. “So, why did he ask for your help rather than come to me himself?” His father had never had trouble letting his sons know when they displeased him.
“I believe he was afraid.”
Ben laughed at the comment. “My father has never been afraid a day in his life. That I can assure you.”
“Perhaps not,” Jack conceded, without conviction, “but I do think fear played a part in his request.”
Ben dismissed Jack’s statement out of hand. “What on earth could he have feared?”
“Losing you.”
Stunned by Jack’s response, Ben glanced toward the small cot, the thin blankets tangled in a ball on it. He thought back to the night he’d considered putting a gun to his head, ending it all. The night Tori had saved him from the ultimate enemy—himself. “He was right to be afraid.”
Jack studied him, considering his response a long time before acknowledging the telling comment. “I see. I’m sorry, old friend.”
“Sorry?”
“I feel as though I failed you. I could see the changes occurring in you upon our return from France, but I convinced myself you merely needed time. Time to adjust, time to become accustomed to normal life. Then Hayley appeared in my life, and I stopped paying attention.”
Rising slowly, Ben placed a hand on Jack’s shoulder. “You have nothing to apologize for. I stopped paying attention as well.”
At Jack’s confused glance, he continued to speak. “I was so mired in my own self-hatred and depression, I failed to see all the marvelous things I had to live for. A loving family, kind servants, a new daughter who has become more precious to me with each passing day, a home, two wonderful friends. I foolishly risked losing all of that.” Walking over to the small bed, he picked up the blanket, carefully spreading it out, smoothing the wrinkles.
“No more depression?”
“A clumsy girl with amnesia whom I mistook for a whore seems to have chased all my dark clouds away,” Ben replied with amusement.
“A whore?”
“Yes, well, apparently fashions change somewhat in the next two hundred years or so.”
At Jack’s laughter, Ben turned his thoughts back to the night, recalling Tori’s face, her kisses, her soft caresses. Trust and love had been written in her lovely eyes. He’d replaced that look with tears. He couldn’t begin to imagine how his life would have turned out without her. Actually, without her, he seriously doubted he would still be here to ponder the fact.
Ben sighed heavily. “I suppose I’ve made a mess of it all.”
Smiling, Jack approached him, his hand strong upon Ben’s shoulder. “Oh, I wouldn’t worry about that too much. It’s clear to me that woman is as in love with you as you are with her. Go back to the Grange, say you’re sorry, grovel if necessary, then grab hold of the lady with both hands and never let her go. It’ll be the best decision of your life, trust me.”
Chapter 23
V is for Vanished
Upon returning to the Grange, Ben was met, not by Vee, but by her two livid friends.
“Good job, asshole,” Hayley cried as soon as he crossed the threshold.
“Hayley,” Jack admonished, but Hayley was far too angry to acknowledge her husband’s warning.
“Who the hell do you think you are?” She poked Ben in the chest, hard. “How dare you
make her cry.”
Taking a deep breath, Ben tried to stem the overwhelming emotions coursing through his body. Anger, confusion, desperation, hopelessness all surged through him, and Hayley’s tirade broke the dam.
“My affairs are none of your concern, madam,” he answered tersely. “Nor will they ever be.”
“Tori’s affairs are my concern.” Her words stressed the fact she was well aware of his and Vee’s actions during the night. “They have been since she was ten years old.”
“Has it not occurred to you that perhaps she no longer needs your assistance? That she is a grown woman who can take care of herself?”
Taken aback by his comment, Hayley fell silent.
Erin stepped forward. “I believe you’re right. Tori isn’t the girl we remember who was too shy to stand up against bullies or her overbearing mother, nor is she the shy young lady who was always most at home surrounded by children and books. She is different. Stronger, more confident, more, well, just more. Wouldn’t you agree, Hayley?”
Hayley appeared slightly calmer than she’d been only a moment before. “I guess now that you mention it, she does seem different. I’m not sure Tori would have come storming into that cabin yesterday waving a club in her hands if we’d been back home.”
Ben grinned at her description, despite the fact that Tori’s reckless actions still terrified him. He never wanted to see her risk her life or put herself in such a dangerous position again. In fact, after they were married, he would—his thoughts paused.
If they were married. If his careless comments hadn’t destroyed her trust in him, once and for all.
“Where is she?” he asked, looking at Erin.
“She went upstairs to lie down. She looked wiped out, so I suggested a nap,” Erin replied.
“Help me,” Ben muttered.
“Let her sleep for a little while,” Erin suggested.
Hayley grinned, adding her own two-cents’ worth. “Then crawl in on your hands and knees and beg for her forgiveness.”
“And that will work?” Ben was amused by Tori’s friends’ advice though his heart was aching.
Erin nodded while Hayley replied, “It works for Jack every time.”
* * * *
Tori looked out the window of her bedroom. No, not her bedroom, at least not yet. She had another hundred and ninety years to wait before she could officially claim this space. Rubbing her forehead to ease the headache forming there, she wondered again why she wasn’t falling apart.
Ben had lied to her. No, worse than that, he thought she was a liar. And a crazy one, to boot. When she’d woken this morning to find him no longer in the bed, she’d been overcome by a feeling of dread. It was as if she knew all along that everything in this time was exactly as it seemed. An illusion. The trip through time, her romance with Ben, finding Hayley and Erin again, all of it was too fantastic to be believed; too good to be true.
Clearly the other June girls had found their niche in this life, falling in love with their soul mates, creating a home here. That wasn’t surprising. Her friends were nothing if not adaptable. Unlike her. She was a creature of habit, a person afraid of change, uneasy with confrontations of any kind. Despite her parents’ relentless rearing efforts and because of some freaky, mixed-up genetics, this was as good as it got. Too shy, too clumsy, too weak to ever be taken seriously. Too ordinary to ever be loved by someone as wonderful as Lord Benjamin Sinclair, the lying, miserable, son of a, well, duke. Here she was, stuck in the past, failing to fit in any better than she did in the future. A fish out of water, again.
“No more,” she whispered to herself. Perhaps she didn’t belong here, but she’d be damned if she’d sit in this room shedding one more tear over Benjamin Sinclair. She’d done what she had come to do. Her friends were safe and sound, both happily married. Heck, Erin was a mother. It was time for Tori to stop looking back and to begin to move forward with her own life. Her future was out there waiting for her. Without the anxiety surrounding her friends’ disappearances, it was time she took steps to secure her own happy ending. Feeling lighter, she escaped the stifling atmosphere of the room. She had an overwhelming desire to be outside, soaking up the sunshine.
Taking the back stairwell, she meandered through the lovely garden at the rear of the house. Remembering to take time to smell the roses, she stopped briefly to pluck a bud of deep red, tucking it behind her ear. Leaving the garden, she followed the first path she encountered, unconcerned with her direction.
Glancing up after several moments of quiet contemplation, she was surprised to discover the path led directly to the old oak tree. A small shiver snaked down her spine as she studied its familiar leaf-laden branches. How could such an innocuous thing be the catalyst for so much turmoil and change? Even now, she was amazed by its power.
Approaching it slowly and wearily, she walked around the thick trunk, running her hands lightly on the rough bark.
“What are you?” she whispered to the silent tree. “Can you truly send me home again?” She wondered if home was where she wanted to be. Could she return to the future, even with all its amenities and comforts and leave her friends behind? She missed her job, tiny apartment, lovely library and sweet children desperately, but were those things enough anymore?
Her time in the past had taught her so many things about herself that she wouldn’t have discovered had she never made this miraculous journey. Could she leave Hayley and Erin again after only just finding them?
“Who am I fooling?” She slid down the trunk of the tree, sitting beneath it in the shade. “I can’t leave Ben and Chelsea. Hell, I can’t even leave the Henrys.” She smiled as she thought of her serious lord and his no-longer silent charge, the robust housekeeper and her slight husband. In her short time here, the residents of Waterplace had treated her like a beloved and cherished member of their family. They’d completely accepted her, warts and all, which was more than her own parents had ever done.
“Stay or go, Hamilton?” She lightly tapped the back of her head against the tree. She’d never felt so torn. “Come on, magic tree. Give me an answer. You did this to me. Straighten out the mess you’ve made of my life.” When nothing happened, she started to laugh lightly. “On my own, eh? Thanks a lot.”
“Talking to a tree,” came a deep voice behind her. “You’re crazier than I thought.”
Startled by the unwelcome, familiar voice, she attempted to still the sudden pounding of her heart.
“I thought you’d be miles from here by now,” she replied with more calm than she felt, standing and turning slowly.
“Unfinished business,” Prescott answered, a pistol in his hands.
Thoughts of running were washed away as she considered the weapon pointed directly at her in his all-too steady hands.
“You’ll never get near that little girl.” The strength in her voice surprised Tori. She was sounding more like Hayley every day. “She’s well-protected.”
“Don’t give a damn ‘bout that little brat anymore. Truth’s out about me. I won’t never know a minute’s peace. Always running ’til they catch me and hang me for murder.”
“So why run?” She prayed someone would happen by. Where was everyone? “Why not give yourself up?”
A harsh laugh erupted from Prescott as he took a step closer to her. “You’d like that, wouldn’t you? You interfering bitch. You ruined me,” he shouted. “Now you’re the unfinished business.”
Throwing caution to the wind, she twirled, hoping she could outrun Prescott once again, but this time he was too close. She hadn’t taken two steps before he was upon her. Grabbing her shoulders roughly, she felt the chain on her necklace break and fall to the ground. Struggling to free herself from his grasp, she kicked back, missing her target by mere inches. Prescott, unwilling to prolong the fight, hit her head hard with the butt of the gun and for the second time in her life, Tori lost consciousness beneath the giant oak.
* * * *
Taking Hayley and Erin’s adv
ice, Ben paced the floor of the library for half an hour practicing his apology. Unable to wait a moment longer, he quickly ascended the stairs in search of Tori. He needed to make things right with her, once and for all. Then she could nap. If things turned out all right, maybe they could nap together.
Regardless of her past, he no longer had any doubt she was destined to be his present and future. If he had to crawl on the floor, begging for forgiveness as Hayley suggested, he would do it. He simply couldn’t imagine his life without her in it. Somehow he had to convince her to stay, to believe in him and in his love for her.
Knocking on the door to her bedchamber, he tapped his foot impatiently, anxious about his reception. Would she be angry? Throwing things and yelling. Or would she be disappointed? Quiet and resigned. He wasn’t sure how he would deal with either response, but one way or another, he would make amends.
When there was no answer, he knocked louder, then turned the knob. Finding the door unlocked, he pushed it open, surprised to find the room empty. Her friends thought she was here, yet she hadn’t come downstairs since his return.
Chelsea, he thought. Perhaps she was with Chelsea in the nursery. Hastily leaving the room, he walked down the hall and climbed the stairs to the schoolroom Erin and Alex had set up for Elise on the third floor. Rushing into the room without knocking, he was disappointed to discover only Chelsea with baby Elise and her nurse.
“Oh,” he said, at the nurse’s surprised glance. “I beg your pardon. I was hoping to find Miss Hamilton.”
“She hasn’t been here all mornin’, milord,” the nurse replied.
Aware of Chelsea’s close study of his worried face, he knelt down, careful to hide his anxiety with a smile.
“Well,” he said lightly, “perhaps this angel has seen her.” Kissing her softly on the forehead, he scooped her up in his arms, pleased when she quickly wrapped her arms around his neck, giggling. No longer did she turn stiff at his touch, but instead she embraced him and returned his own kiss with a sweet one of her own on his cheek.