by Chloe Butler
“Oh. In that case.” I climbed off him, and we reshuffled on the bed until he was on top of me, burying his face between my boobs. He kissed down my belly and onto my pubic hair, and then his tongue found my clit. Oh god. Oh god oh god oh god. He was kissing my pussy. Somehow he dipped his tongue into my entrance and then back to my clit, where he flicked it expertly. I moaned in appreciation and put my hands on the back of his head.
I’d thought about Zach’s face between my legs—of course I had—and wondered whether his beard would be too scratchy, but it tickled in a way that made all of his motions a little more sensual. To my surprise, I felt my body climbing toward the same cliff I’d abandoned earlier. I crossed my arms behind my head and concentrated on nothing but Zach’s tongue and my clit, and I soared over into orgasm. My back arched, and I cried out. I think I yelled “fuck” at some point, and maybe Zach’s name, and probably some syllables that weren’t actually words. The orgasm seemed to capture my entire body, and it felt like I was coming for days. When it finally subsided, I said, “Get up here,” and Zach climbed on me for a sloppy kiss. I laughed. “I taste good.”
“Damn right you do. Can I ask you something?”
“Sure.”
“Do you always come like that?”
“Like what?”
“Like...like a volcano.”
I thought about what to say. “Actually, um, I’ve never come with a partner before.”
“Seriously?”
“Really. My ex wasn’t—well, you don’t want to hear about him.”
“You’re right, I don’t.” He kissed each of my nipples, still hard from my climax.
“Zach.” I held his head against my chest. “I’m not ready to have you inside me, okay? I mean, I want to, but...”
“Of course,” he said. “I wasn’t expecting any of this. And I really do have to go.”
“Right now?”
“I promised my dad I’d be there. I’ll be back Sunday night.”
I wanted to wrap myself around him and keep his naked body in my bed for the rest of the school year. Probably beyond. But something in the way he said “my dad” told me this was important. While I untangled myself and hopped off the bed, I said, “Do me one favor.”
He looked me up and down. “I don’t see how I could refuse.”
“Give me the name and address of whoever taught you to do that. I want to send her a thank-you note.”
15
When Zach left my room, I was still naked. I spun around and did a stupid little dance that I was glad nobody would ever see. My brain was playing an endless loop of our 45-minute fling. Making love with Zach—even if we hadn’t quite taken it all the way yet, that was how I thought of it—just made clear how awkward Evan and I had been in bed. The few times Evan had gone down on me, it was clear that he didn’t have much experience or interest in it. So I stopped asking.
Zach, on the other hand...goddamn, the boy’s tongue was possessed.
I looked at the clock on my desk. It felt like the middle of the night, but it was only 8:30. Did I want to kiss and tell? Fuck yeah I did. I texted Sierra and Jillian: Need girl talk! Who’s free?
They both were, so we agreed to meet in the dorm lounge. Both women arrived within five minutes. Sierra sat next to me on the couch and Jillian took the puffy chair next to it.
Sometimes a tiny campus was suffocating, but when you needed to assemble your best girlfriends in a minimum amount of time, there was nowhere better. Sierra, who’d come from her room on the second floor, was wearing flannel pajamas, and Jillian was comparatively dressed up in jeans and a tight-fitting zipped-up gray hoodie. “Do you two know each other?” I asked.
“Sure, we’re in Spanish class together,” said Jillian.
“Small talk over,” said Sierra. “Spill!” She paused and made her thinking face. “Did he spill?”
I felt my cheeks flush, and nodded. I told them about the quick hookup in the vaguest terms, which drove Sierra nuts. “Jesus, Brooke, it sounds like you’re dictating a letter to your mom or something. Details! Who came, where, and how many times?”
Trying to ignore my friend, I turned to Jillian. “You’re not disappointed in me for hooking up with him after you told me not to?”
“You told her not to?” said Sierra. “What kind of drugs are they giving freshmen these days? Have you seen Zach?”
Jillian looked a little wounded. “Brooke asked my opinion and I gave it. I knew she was going to jump him. I’m not stupid.”
“You guys, I think maybe I’ve really got it bad for him,” I said. “Is that stupid? I mean, I still don’t really know much about him. And he did run out right after...”
Sierra elbowed me. “Right after what?”
“Right after he got me off.” I bit my lip and tried not to look too smug. Sierra squealed. “What if I just think I like him because he eats pussy really well?” Now it was Jillian’s turn to blush.
“Brooke!” said Sierra. “You can’t talk that way in front of the freshman.”
“Hey, I’m not some virginal farmer’s daughter,” said Jillian. “I appreciate a good tongue-lashing as much as the next girl.”
Sierra laughed. “Well said.” She turned to me. “Is that the worst reason to be into a guy, really?”
“Good point.” I played with the hem of my shirt. “What happens in June, though?”
Jillian held up her hand. “May I?” Sierra nodded. “You don’t even know if you have a relationship yet. How about you figure out the deal is between you and Zach—or don’t, and just have a good time?” She paused. “Sierra, how did I do?”
“Good,” said Sierra. “I’d add: what are you going to do with yourself all weekend while you’re waiting for him to get back? Scratch that, I know what you’re going to be doing with yourself. What are you going to do to welcome him back?”
I knew I would have to keep myself busy over the weekend or I’d go crazy. I sent Zach a couple of flirty texts on Saturday morning, and he responded to each right away.
Me: Morning. Just changing my clothes.
Zach: Mmm. Can’t stop thinking about you.
Me: What about me?
The three dots bounced a few times.
Zach: I want to make you come again.
It was hard to get out of bed out after that. But I dragged myself to the library and studied until lunchtime. After lunch, I went for a swim and worked myself a little too hard. I knew I’d be sore the next day, but I had loads of nervous energy to burn off. It didn’t work. I just felt tired and horny at the same time. I worked a dull shift at the Shark and had dinner with Sierra and Trevor.
Seeing the two of them banter and exchange knowing looks and touch each other in every possible socially acceptable way (and then some) during dinner certainly didn’t help me think about Zach any less. Trevor was a junior who played varsity basketball. He was the starting center for the Cascade Mountain College Mountain Goats—yes, that was the official team name, although everyone just called them the Goats. Naturally, the most popular cheer featured the phrase “get horny!”
Trevor was over a foot taller than Sierra, and they made a striking couple: a tall, lanky jock and a tiny redhead he could easily pick up like a basketball. Sierra told me she only liked him for his body and his skills on and off the court, but the way he looked at her, I could see he was going to end up one of her casualties.
After dinner I caught up on email until I could barely keep my eyes open. Before sleep took over, I texted Zach: I’m keeping my hands off the merchandise until you get back. Will you do the same?
My phone buzzed. Too late. Typing this one-handed. Just kidding. See you soon.
On Sunday I slept until 10:30 and went to brunch in my pajamas, although I put a bra on underneath. I got a cheese omelet and sat with Jillian. We talked about the next geology midterm and I asked about Brian.
“He’s adorable,” said Jillian. “Just loves me. I can’t figure out how to break up with him.”
“Because...” She pulled her teabag out of the paper cup and set it onto her plate, where it oozed a little bit of hot tea. Gross. “He follows me around like a stray dog and only ever wants to make out. I think he really likes me, but we don’t really have anything in common. He’s just happy to have finally found a warm place to stick his dick.”
“Does that mean...?”
“Yeah, he was a virgin. Happy to take care of that for him, but I think we’re done now.” She sighed. “I guess I’ll give him until the end of the semester. That way he’ll probably get over it by fall.”
“That seems practical.” Which, now that I thought about it, was the perfect word to sum up Jillian. I’d noticed that she had an outfit for each day of the week and wore the in a seven-day rotation. Sunday meant denim skirt and pink long-sleeve tee.
Of course, Jillian’s revelation sent me into a spiral. Surely, with the whole weekend to think it over, Zach would conclude that I was only interested in him for sex, which he could presumably get from anyone. So why should he deal with my bullshit? I braced for him to arrive back on campus with a calm “we need to talk.” The fact that I was hornier than I could ever remember being didn’t help soothe my anxiety.
Sure enough, after dinner, I got a text from Zach:
Back on campus in 30. Can I come by?
Shit. “Can I come by?” is exactly what I would say if I had to tell Sierra her dog died while I was dog sitting. No emoji, nothing playful, just a leaden warning sign of a message. Then my phone buzzed again, and I held it up to read: You don’t HAVE to be mostly naked when I get there, but it would save time.
I felt weightless. I looked around, and my room was a mess. And apparently had been on Friday, too, not that I’d noticed. I straightened a teetering pile of textbooks, stuffed a bra into my drawer, and collected the papers on my desk into a stack that I’d have to sort out later. The photo of my family had fallen over, and I propped it back up on its little kickstand.
That taken care of, I considered what to wear. Rummaging through the lacy bras, cotton bras, and assorted underwear in my drawer. I found a sheer peach bra and bikini that had been an impulse buy at Victoria's Secret. Just see-through enough to be interesting, and best of all, I had never worn these with Evan.
The knock on the door came 25 minutes after Zach’s text, and I was so excited, I neglected to look through the peephole. I cracked the door open and said, “Come in.”
Sierra pushed the door open, took one look at me, and said, “Holy shit, are you trying to make him blow his load the second he walks in?”
“Sierra, what the hell are you doing here?”
“I came by to see if you wanted to go for ice cream. But apparently you’re getting all set for boudoir photos.” She pulled out her phone. “I’ll take the first one.”
“Don’t you fucking dare,” I said.
“I wouldn’t, but it’s fun to see you squirm. And I’m sure you’ll have fun making him squirm.”
“Could you, like, go away?”
Sierra grinned. “Seriously, Brooke, you look fucking amazing.”
Someone knocked on the door. This time I checked. It was Zach. I rolled my eyes at Sierra and let him in.
“Ladies,” he said. “Am I interrupting something?”
I pushed Sierra toward the door. “You wish. She was just leaving.”
“Bye!” she said, and slammed the door.
Zach gave me a long, slow, all-the-way-up-and-down look. I tried not to blush. “I was going to ask about your weekend,” he said, “but I don’t know if I can speak. Here, I brought you this.” He handed me a single purple crocus. “I picked it next to the administration building. Thought it might look nice in your hair.”
“You broke the no-picking rule for me?” I took the flower and slipped the stem into my cleavage. “And outside the administration building? I’m harboring a fugitive.”
“Well, how will we pass the time while we’re hiding from the law?” He put his arms around me and rested his hands on the small of my back, just above the waistline of my underwear, whispering, “I really missed you.”
In response, I kissed him, and the surprisingly soft touch of his tongue against mine washed away all of my anxiety. I pressed myself up against him, hard, and said, “Then show me.” I stepped back, turned around, and ran my hand over my ass before climbing into bed. Zach started toward me, but I said, “Uh uh, no clothes allowed over here.”
Zach smiled. “Is this just because of how you feel about buttons?”
“Yeah, if we’re going to keep doing this, you need to start wearing sweats.”
He unbuttoned his shirt, laughing. “You are the first woman to ever suggest that.” Once he was wearing nothing but silky-looking briefs, he looked down at himself and said, “These too?”
“Hmm.” If the goal of Zach’s underpants was to conceal his erection, they were doing a terrible job. “Yeah, those too.” He slid them off and stood completely naked in the middle of my room. The man was like a Greek god. A very aroused one. “Now come here.”
He shook his head. “No clothes allowed over there, remember?”
“Rules are rules, I suppose.” I unhooked my bra, and as I pulled it off, I brushed one breast with my hand. Zach gave a satisfied gasp. So I cupped my breasts in both hands and kneaded them, smiling at him. I felt a little self-conscious, but Zach’s murmurs of approval made it worth it. I hooked a finger into the waistband of my panties and pulled them down just an inch, revealing a hint of freshly-trimmed pubic hair. “These too?”
“Yes!” I loved how I was making him desperate. His dick swayed a little. I couldn’t take my eyes off it.
“Then come get them.”
He walked over slowly and said, “You’re the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen.” He reached for me, but I pushed a hand flat against his chest, and I felt his powerful muscles flare.
“Wait,” I said. I slid my hand into my underwear and dipped two fingers into my pussy, then brought them to his lips. He licked them hungrily.
“Brooke, please...” he began.
“Please what?” I wrapped my hand around his shaft, and it was so thick my fingers could barely close around it. I kissed the head of his cock, but then pulled back and jumped onto the bed. In a flash, I had my panties off, and I spread my legs and put a hand demurely over my pussy. “Do you want to kiss me here?”
“Yes.”
“Were you thinking about my pussy this weekend?”
“Yes.” He kissed my hard nipple.
“Good.” I moved my hand, revealing my wet lips, and he had his mouth on me so quickly I’m not sure how he managed it. He zeroed in on my clit and licked it expertly. Seriously, Zach’s mystery ex deserved a medal. I gripped the sheet with both hands and pressed myself back against his face, and then he sent me over the edge, and I came so hard I screamed, and my hips bucked up and down, and my neck tingled, and the room went fuzzy. “Holy shit,” I swore, and looked down at Zach, who was still perched between my legs, resting his chin on his elbows, looking smug. He gave my pussy one more gentle kiss before climbing on top of me.
“Seriously, dude,” I said, kissing him.
“I’ll take that as a compliment.”
His erection pressed against my belly, and I wrapped my hand around it again and said, “I’ll take this as a compliment.” His skin was weathered but surprisingly soft. I stroked his cock while we kissed, and I felt it twitch. “Is this good?”
“Fuck, yes,” he breathed. I kept moving my hand. Zach kissed my neck, my earlobe, my hair. “God, you smell good.” I smiled. He sat up, straddling me, and I stroked him faster. “Yeah, like that,” he muttered. I watched his face, the intense concentration, the stubble growing where he’d shaped his beard. He was beautiful. I wondered if he was thinking about me. Suddenly, his eyes opened, and I felt his cock swell. “Brooke, I’m going to—” Before he could finish, though, he erupted, and a jet of semen spur
ted out over my body. I covered the tip of his cock with my other hand and let it spray against my palm.
I smiled at him. “Do you always come like that?”
“Sorry, I—”
“Oh, come on. You think I didn’t know what was going to happen? Pass me a tissue.”
He pulled a couple of Kleenex out of the box on my bedside table and helped wipe me clean, then rested his head between my breasts. “So how were things at home?” I asked.
“Rough.”
I ran my hand over the side of his face. “You want to talk about it?”
“Not right now.”
“You want to spend the night?”
16
Before we went to sleep, I put on a nightshirt, but I skipped the panties. Zach told me he usually slept nude, and did that bother me?
It didn’t.
We tussled a little bit trying to find an appropriate position to sleep in. Well, maybe “appropriate” is the wrong word, since I ended up as the little spoon, with Zach’s arm thrown over me and his penis pressed against my bare ass.
I didn’t sleep much. The dorm’s twin beds were barely big enough for one tall person, and sharing a bed with the luscious naked form of Zach Hutchison would have made it hard to doze off even in a California King.
Zach, on the other hand, was snoring gently. I watched his bare chest rise and fall next to me and wondered: How, exactly, am I going to fuck this up?
Intellectually, I knew that what happened with Evan wasn’t my fault. But even nearly a year later, it was impossible not to wonder whether I might have done just one or two things to lead him in that direction. Maybe I could have stopped asking him what was on his mind so often, or been better at sex, or...I know, toxic thinking. But sometimes, at 2 a.m., that’s the only kind you get.
“You awake?” he whispered.
“Yeah.” He kissed my chin. I put my hand on his chest and felt his heart beating hard. “What’s wrong?”
I could tell he was winding up to say something. Finally, he sighed and said, “My aunt and I, we transferred my dad to a home this weekend.”