by E. Latimer
The hallway wasn't long, and the last door on the left came up fast.
I knocked once, and waited. My breath came short and ragged, like I'd been running the hundred meter dash. I was going to see Loki again.
The thought gave me goose bumps, and my chest felt tight from some strange combination of panic and anticipation. The door creaked open, and there he was, smiling down at me in delight. Like he hadn't been sure I would come. His curls were even messier than usual, and the blond wig was in one hand.
"Well, hello, darlin'. Glad you could make it."
~ * ~
Loki ushered me in, and I was hit by the smell of bread baking. My stomach rumbled loudly, and he laughed.
"Good thing we're meeting in the kitchen, isn't it?"
The servants’ kitchen was spacious and much plainer than any of the rooms I was used to. The walls were actually made out of wood instead of ice, as if the jotun hadn't bothered to waste magic on this section. There was a roaring fire at the far end, and a long, solid table in the center.
Kitchen staff bustled around—some chopping vegetables at the table, others checking meat cooking over the fire.
A few glanced up and gave Loki and me a cheerful nod and a wink, and I found myself smiling back almost involuntarily.
This was different than the rest of the palace. So much warmer.
Loki had been watching my face, and he grinned. "Do you like it? I feel most at home here. It's a bit more what I'm used to."
Inhaling the scent of bread again, I nodded. "It's wonderful. It seems less uptight around here."
He tipped his head back when he laughed. I loved the sound. It made me want to do an entire stand-up comedy routine right then and there, just so I could keep hearing it.
Loki sobered up a little, though his eyes still sparkled. "They're a family around here. Even if they're treated like dirt, they band together. It makes things less toxic than out there."
Toxic. It was an accurate description for the politics and backstabbing that went on in court. I nodded and then glanced up, startled, when a chubby blond woman with red cheeks bustled over and set a tray on the counter beside us.
"Here you are, dears. It's dinnertime right now. Can't have you missing out." She poked Loki in the ribs with one sausage-like finger, and he swatted at her hand. "You have to get some meat on those bones."
"Stop trying to fatten me up, Auga. I don't taste nearly as good as I look."
After she'd returned to her vegetable chopping, Loki turned to me. He placed one hand on the small of my back, sending a shiver through me. "Eat. Get something in you. You look tired."
"Everyone keeps saying that," I grumbled.
"You're worrying. That's why," Loki said sternly. "You should stop worrying and come with me."
I hesitated. The reason I'd come kept popping up in the back of my mind. Up until now, it had seemed like the right thing to do. Warn him, help him save his people. But warning him officially made me a traitor. I didn't know much about war, but I knew that warning the enemy camp was considered bad. That was a no-brainer.
I changed the subject. "Did all the servants know I was coming here? None of them seemed surprised."
Loki grabbed a piece of bread off the plate and layered cheese on it as he spoke. "It's no big deal. They think you're having a thing with me." He looked down at me, his mouth twitching at one corner.
I tried to keep my face straight. "That would be a ridiculous assumption.”
"Would it?" He reached out and took my wrist, which made me jump and blush furiously, but he only put the piece of bread and cheese in my hand. "Eat."
Hopefully he couldn't see how he was affecting me. "Yes. Ridiculous." I took a bite and then realized how impossible it was to look cool and unaffected while eating a cheese sandwich. Loki looked amused, which sort of made me want to kick him in the shins. "Have you thought about what I said?"
All I had been doing all day was thinking—thinking and worrying. About the dream, about going with him, about the war. My chest ached when I thought about the women and children in the dream, trapped and frightened, huddled together. His people. The people Amora had spared. In two weeks, we'd attack them again. I had to tell him.
I swallowed and took a deep breath. "Erik told me something. Something nobody knows yet."
His smile faded. "What is it?"
"The queen has decided."
The look on his face made me stumble over my words. He already knew what I was about to say. "She...She's going to attack in two weeks."
Loki was quiet for several long seconds.
Was he angry I hadn't told him right away? His face was almost blank, like he was struggling to process his emotions. "Thank you for telling me."
My voice was barely a whisper. "You're welcome."
A strange, heavy feeling collected around me, like the air was just a little bit too thick to breathe properly. If anyone was listening, I had just sealed my fate. I was a traitor.
"You're going to leave now. To warn your people." It wasn't a question.
The idea of him leaving started prickles of panic low in my gut. Having him at the palace had felt a tiny bit safer. It was scary that he might be caught, but he was also a backup plan. I could go with him and escape this place if I needed to. But now, he had to leave.
Loki looked tortured, eyes flicking back and forth, to my face and then away again. "I have to. I have to tell my father. We have to prepare for battle. We knew this day would come at some point, but we'd hoped..." He shook his head.
The pain on his face tore at my chest, made my breath short and uneven.
He faced me, eyes locked on mine. When he grabbed my hands, I didn't back away. His fingers were warm and rough, his hands strong, but his voice was a strained whisper.
"Say you'll come with me. We'll go together. You can warn my father, carry the message to him. There is no way he'll do anything but thank you for it. You'll be hailed a hero. It's perfect, Megan. Please, I can't leave you here."
I opened my mouth to say no, to tell him that was crazy, but the words didn’t come. Was it crazy?
He was right. It was likely that, if I came before the fire king and warned him about what my people were going to do, he would spare me. Perhaps even let me stay there as a guest. And with Loki backing me up...
Loki, being with Loki, traveling with Loki—the idea was incredibly appealing. Exciting and terrifying all at the same time. And I'd already decided I wasn't staying at the palace. With guards stalking my every move, the threat of Gunnar hanging over me, and the promise of war, it was either leave with Loki or leave by myself.
"Let me talk to Charlotte."
A wide grin brightened his face, and he squeezed my hands excitedly. "Excellent. Talk to her, convince her to come. Then meet me here tomorrow night."
“But the guards—”
“Don’t worry. I have a few tricks up my sleeve. There’ll be a distraction tomorrow night, right around midnight. Your guards will be unavoidably detained.”
So that was it? I had just decided to go with him? My heart was thundering against my ribs, and it took a few seconds for me to breathe again. "Okay. I'll see you then."
Then I had to go, though I wanted to linger there in the warm kitchen with him. It was back out into the courtyard, through the snow, to find the right window along the wall.
Chapter Thirty-Nine
I realized my error as soon as I looked for the window on the other side. I couldn't see into any of them. They were too high along the wall. It wasn't like I had a couch to climb on this time. Idiot.
I could go back inside and show up at the bathroom door. The thought of the Vikings twins’ reactions sort of made me want to, but there was no way to explain myself if I just sauntered up. I'd have to go back and ask Loki for a boost.
My face was already burning as I headed back for the entrance. He was probably going to laugh at me, and I wouldn't blame him.
The sun was sinking along the skyline
now, almost gone, throwing a few last spears of orange light across the surface of the snow. It had just started to set when I’d left, so that meant I hadn't been gone that long. Still, I walked as fast as I could, ignoring my sore ankle.
It might only be a matter of minutes before the Viking twins got suspicious.
Almost at the entrance, as I rounded the corner, the sound of voices skipped across the snow, echoing from up ahead.
"We need to work on our perimeter patrol. That's two men I've caught slacking. They're lucky I'm not the type to report it back to her."
I froze, my heart racing. The voice was Erik's. Shit.
If he saw me running around out here, there was no way he would believe I was just out for a stroll. He was smarter than that. The only other option was to go in the back entrance on the opposite side of the servants' quarters.
I bolted, my heart in my throat, praying that he wouldn't come this way before I ducked inside. The packed snow creaked under my feet, the sound sending a spike of panic through me. If he heard...
It seemed to take forever. The snow slowed me down, and my left ankle felt like it was being repeatedly jabbed with a hot poker. Finally, I reached the door and snatched at the handle with shaking hands, afraid I would find it mysteriously locked.
When it creaked open, I could have cried with relief.
I stepped through and nearly walked right into someone. Another guard.
He gave me a startled look, and I blurted out the first thing that came to mind. “I just went looking for Erik. I found him. He's meeting me in the library later."
The guard blinked, and I ducked my head and kept going, relieved he wasn't trying to stop me. Of course there was another guard on the back door. I should have figured that one out. Apparently, I was terrible at this sneaking-around stuff.
What if he reported back to Erik or asked him how our library meeting went? No, I was overthinking this. It was fine. I would sneak back inside, go all the way to the servants' quarters, and get Loki.
And then...go back outside?
Damn. I'd have to get him past the guards. And yeah, they thought he was a servant, but somehow, I doubted that wig could hold up under scrutiny.
I was starting to sweat.
Back inside, the entrance I'd walked through led straight past the hallway where the public washroom was, so though I'd be all the way down a long hall, I'd still have to dart past the Viking twins without being seen. That was why I hadn't wanted to take this particular door.
The hallway was empty, but again, I could hear the echo of voices from somewhere up ahead. Dinner was over, and people had started filing out of the hall. This was probably the worst possible time for me to be sneaking around. My entire body was vibrating, and my stomach really did feel sick now.
Peering around the corner of the hallway, I was ready to duck back in as soon as I saw the beefy forms of the twins, but the hallway was empty.
What the hell?
This was definitely the right hallway though. More noise, behind me this time, and I squared my shoulders and scurried toward the bathroom. If they had given up and gone to report to Erik, I would at least pretend to be returning to them. Already, excuses were forming in my head. I was getting sick of them shadowing me everywhere. They were boring and silent, and they creeped me out.
Accurate. The best lies are based in truth.
When I reached the bathroom door, it was open, and the Viking twins were inside. They were facing away from me, their arms folded, both of them staring at the last bathroom stall on the end as if they expected me to materialize. I slipped inside, my heart thumping as I pressed myself into the corner beside the stall just as they both jerked upright and turned around.
"There she is."
Chapter Forty
Erik was furious. He was pacing back in forth in front of my bed, stomping so hard that the hand mirror on the vanity table kept rattling. By now, I was angry too, in defense mode, more out of fear than actual anger. If he found out why I'd really snuck out, I could get Loki killed.
"I told you." My voice sounded sharp, but I was too frustrated to care. "They were driving me nuts. You couldn't have assigned someone a little less creepy?"
"Creepy?" Erik spun on his heel and threw his hands in the air. "Your life could be in danger and all you can think about is how creepy they are? Seriously, Amora, what were you thinking?"
"I'm not Amora." I only muttered it under my breath this time, rebellious, sullen.
But Erik caught the words, and his eyes glittered. "Maybe you're right. Amora would have never done anything so stupid."
It had been driving me insane to constantly have people think of me as her, to have my own identity stripped away from me. But still, the words had been thrown at me like an insult, and it stung.
"Really? From what I've heard about her, she would have done the exact same thing if something was bothering her."
He faltered and then ran his hands through his hair, his chest heaving. I'd never seen him so worked up, not even when he'd seen the finger-shaped bruises Leif had left on my shoulder.
"You know you're in danger, don't you?" He spread his hands out, almost pleading now. "How can I make you understand that?"
When he leaned forward and seized my shoulders, I just blinked at him, startled. His face was so close to mine, his lips just inches away. He stared at me, his blue eyes lit from within. An almost feverish light.
"You have to understand me. The prince is a firecracker with a lit fuse, and Gunnar might be even worse. I need to keep you protected."
His eyes moved rapidly back and forth. He wasn't looking at me anymore. He was thinking, his expression going hard and cold. Still, he didn't let my shoulders go.
Any other time, having him this close might have given me butterflies, but it was cold dread that settled in my stomach instead. What was he about to do? Put another two guards on me? Lock me away in my room forever? I was supposed to meet Loki tomorrow.
He turned his gaze back to me. "You're staying here until I know you're safe. I've already berated those two. They know not to let you out of here unless I give them the command."
I opened my mouth to protest, but Erik's grip on my shoulders tightened ever so slightly, and he looked so furious that the complaints dried up on my tongue.
He released me and stepped back. "I'm talking to Leif too. He's going to find out exactly what the queen is capable of if he harms you."
I sat up straight, cold dread blooming inside my stomach. "Please don't. I don't want him—"
"You don't get a say in this anymore." He cut me off sharply. "I respected your request because I thought I could trust you not to do anything foolish. But now, it's clearly up to me to make sure you don't get yourself killed."
He turned away before I could think of anything else to say, stomping out of the room, slamming one of the double doors shut behind him.
Feeling drained, I let myself flop backward onto the bed. It made me feel a bit sick to have him so angry with me. But it was also a relief that he hadn't questioned my reason for having snuck away. Loki was safe.
He was safe, and he was leaving. And how the hell was I going to meet up with him tomorrow night? I wished Charlotte were here to talk to. I had to tell her that I was thinking of leaving. If she came, maybe she'd have some kind of plan to get us out.
The thought made me feel even guiltier about Erik. That was the last he'd see of me. We'd had a big fight, and now, I was going to disappear on him. Spirited away by his enemy, for all he knew.
Maybe I could leave him a note.
Sighing, I stared at the roof and waited for Charlotte to return. She was probably off somewhere with that boy she liked. And now, I had to be the one to tell her we were leaving tomorrow night.
I rolled over and buried my face in the pillow.
~ * ~
The door clicked open a minute later, and I sat up, Charlotte's name on my lips. When I saw who it was, my words died. Leif was standing i
n the doorway. He was dressed in a leather jerkin with a pointed collar over a white shirt, and he still had his sword strapped to his belt.
Judging by the snowflakes in his hair, he'd just come from outside. There was a white sweater draped over his shoulder, and he pulled it off and threw it carelessly. It landed in the middle of the floor.
"You left your sweater in the training room."
"That's not mine." I stood up slowly, my eyes darting from him to the door, which was still open a crack.