I took off.
The losers and Hood were supposed to draw the bitches and Kayty off. Hood was supposed to lock his sister in a cell somewhere. I’d been looking for that. With all the excitement, I got turned around. Thus, we got fouled up somewhere.
And I was so hyped up on the smell of the princess that I had to have her once I’d started the chase, or die trying.
So I took off, and the bitches came after me. Talk about the hounds of hell, holy shit. I never ran so fast in my life. I knew I was setting speed records. I was hearing all sorts of things, too. Them yelling back and forth. And in the dark, when I’d stopped to breathe, think and get my bearings, I heard her. I wouldn’t say she yelped, exactly, but she whined. I picked her voice out of the crowd, and let that set my compass. Zeroed in on her.
I found myself outside her cell, panting hard, peering in.
That was no lupus standing there. It was a full crinos specimen of perfect breeding. I could not have been more hot for a woman than I was at that moment, with the whole pack circling back, practically breathing down my neck. Call it the thrill of being caught.
I went through the locks without any trouble. Hood had given me the combinations, which is another one of those things that made me wonder, did he, or did he not want me to succeed? All he had to do was give me the wrong combo for the last lock.
So, I yanked the door open and stood there, staring, sniffing, thinking about throwing her down and fucking her right there. Yeah, that was what it was all about at that moment.
I didn’t, though. I reached in, grabbed her hand, claw, paw, whatever and started running. But she helped me, led me out of there. The avenue I was supposed to take was blocked by the noisy, oncoming pack of bitches. Which again made me wonder who was on my side, and who was pointing them toward me. Apparently, some of them can communicate like psychics. Yeah, total bullshit, I know.
The trip out was another one of those lessons in stamina. We ended up crawling through caves and shit. She was ahead of me, leading the way, dripping down her legs the whole way--driving me insane with want.
I don’t think I could forget her scent--ever. At one point, I had to grab ahold and indulge myself. Licked up her leg, all the way to her core. I would have climbed all the way up on her, but the back of the cavern was too low.
Fast forward some more.
To when we’d reached a rendezvous point that I’d prearranged with the losers, and with Hood. Yeah, the hunt went on for hours.
But there came a point when the princess and I managed to draw extra breath, breathe safe and look each other in the eye.
It was funny, but I had to ask, “What’s your name?”
Chapter Six
She pursed her lips, holding back a grin, and said, “Fera.”
I said, “Pretty.” Yeah, I was going for obvious flattery. I wanted her to like me up front.
She quipped back, “Beats being called bitch.”
“Well, my little stolen bitch,” I growled--couldn’t help it, I was fucking ready to throw her down. Wait. I corrected myself, trying desperately to get that under control, saying, “Fera, I have to tell you--I have this indescribable urge to lay you down and fuck your brains out.”
I know, so much for sweet-talking her. I look back at that moment and kick myself in the ass every time. But--you know what she said? She taunted me with, “Why don’t you?”
I remember trying to be clever, telling her that I was waiting for her to beg me. I have no idea why I said that. Trying to make conversation before I did exactly what I wanted to do?
But I’m not shitting you when I say, I couldn’t think around her. I felt like I’d run the hardest race of my life--that’s saying something--and come inches to the finish line, and--I didn’t know how to take the last step.
Since she wasn’t asking my name, I volunteered that it was Jack. I spouted some sort of nonsense about not wanting to jump her bones without warning. She bounced back with, “Why not?”
Can you see how this was going? I was trying to get some semblance of control over my emotions, my libido, and she was wrecking that all to hell.
I lied through my teeth--but was completely honest, if that makes any sense--when I told her next that I didn’t want a fast fuck. I wanted that, and more. You should have been there. The whole thing was quick back and forth, with my dumb silences between.
Okay. This is the reason behind me putting all this on paper. I had to get this in writing, in case anything ever comes back around, in case I get myself killed. I hope someone will make sure Fera sees this.
I wanted her more than I could have ever imagined. I knew I’d fallen hard and big time--probably back there at the cell. When I saw her in lupus, I wanted her bad--but that could have been her scent.
And I struggled with that. I remember thinking...this is the princess? Hood’s sister? If she hadn’t been in heat, I would have walked away. But there was a distinctly human fragrance about her. It confused the hell out of me.
I mean, back at Lobos, and then at my apartment, Hood had mentioned, several times that there were the lupus born. Duh. I did not get it.
Call it narrow-minded blinders.
Let me get this straight--I am not into humans having sex with animals. What do you call it, bestiality?
So, I knew I’d been set up. In fact, I vacillate between ripping Hood’s head off, and slaughtering all the losers. They want to talk about what’s unnatural? Well, fucking a dog is unnatural.
Does this make sense?
I am a man. I sometimes shift into a werewolf--a monster that I have trouble controlling. But always, I am a man.
Not that Fera’s a dog. She’s a well-bred wolf. But--son of a bitch if there isn’t a terrible screw here. She isn’t a wolf. I mean, she’s supposedly lupus born, but I swear...she’s a human that’s been trapped in a lupus form. I’d swear it was some sort of black magic. And maybe that’s it. Maybe, when the world is all done, we’ll find out that some hidden force cast a spell on certain genetic lines. I’m thinking that might not be so far-fetched, now that I’ve stepped into the nightmare that only Hollywood should have come up with.
So, Fera and I were there, both in crinos--both caught up in that nightmare. And, I think, we both wanted to shift to human so bad it was killing us. But there was an attraction. Something undeniable between us.
She’s told me that she saw me when I first stumbled in front of the den. Kind’ve bounced out of the trees there. Remember? I told you about it. There were too many shadows, and I was afraid to focus or hang around for long. She said she was sort of stricken by my pose.
That makes me laugh. I asked, “What? My impression of a scared rabbit?”
She says it didn’t look like that. That I looked magnificent. Ha. I think she was looking for a hero. I also think that’s why Hood picked me. I’m hero material at first glance, I guess--being an Olympian and all. But on second glance, when you look inside me, you’ll see I’m shaking to death.
I know I was shaking--all the way through--when I opened that cell and got my first good look at Fera standing upright.
I thought, is this what I’ve been running for--all my life?
Yeah. I’m talking love at first real sight.
And the reason I think that is--is because, I looked into her eyes and felt my heart skip a beat. Not only did my lower body jump to attention--and it’s been rock hard ever since, I think--but I couldn’t breathe. And that wasn’t because I’d been giving the pack the runaround.
So, we were out there, facing each other--and she was waiting for me to make my move, and I was trying to think of a good approach, but totally dumb fucked. I knew, somewhere in the back of my brain, that a crinos ‘bitch’ is unpredictable, and especially one that was in a first change. I knew she could go totally ape-shit on me at any moment and I’d be dead on the ground. So you could say I had some instant respect for her in that regard. But, like I’ve said more than once, it really wasn’t my life that I cared about.
I felt like that had been stolen. I was living someone else’s reality at that point.
I can say this...I absolutely desired Fera. I wanted to climb up inside her and cradle her against me, and never let her go. I still feel that way. And I know that that’s dangerous.
Especially since I keep coming back to a total distrust of her brother, how we were set up, and Lobos International’s whole deal. And that’s something I’m really struggling with. What will Fera think, if she ever gets wind of the fact that Hood did his fancy little database search and lined up our genetics--that he flew me halfway around the world so I could meet her. Now, that scares me. I’m afraid I could lose...everything.
But enough of my fears. We were out there, had caught our breath, and I recall standing there, the air thick between us, feeling a connection...and kissing Fera’s shoulder. Such a sweet--and sad--gesture. It felt a little desperate. I wanted to make contact but I was timid, afraid to make that move.
It was more because I’m a man. I don’t like putting my inner self on the line. I mean, sure, I put my body on the line all the time. And I push myself mentally, too. But that’s because I’m an emotional handicap. I crack jokes because things get a little tight on my space. Does that make sense?
We had a connection. An untouchable, indescribable something that kind of hung between us, lacing little spider threads around us, drawing us closer and closer until I actually touched her. And yes, it felt reverent. I felt like a beggar...just hoping she’d let me close to her, let me explore the kismet.
I never believed in that sort of thing before, but now I do. I know that you can feel someone’s loneliness, it can speak to your own, and somewhere in the middle, you can both feel complete. I’m sure I sound like a sap.
But I’m a scared sap. I’m hanging onto something that could come undone with one bad word from...how many people? Anyone at Lobos? The losers? Maybe Leer? And if he’s confided in Kayty--that’s the most likely way for Fera to hear about the plotting behind her back. And from that source, I don’t think she’d give me a chance to defend myself. One little truth will lead to another, and then everything that happened to me at Lobos could come unraveled. I would lose Fera. I know it. She would walk away from me and never look back.
I have to protect her from all that. It could tear her apart. Us apart.
And then I might have to show them a little ‘unnatural rampage’.
I think Fera jumped to some conclusions about me, and my first change. I didn’t correct her. Mostly because I don’t know what to tell her, how much to reveal. It all damns me and her brother, and I know it. She has no idea what Hood does, not really, or the hand he played in bringing us together. It all just keeps looping back through my brain--while I try to figure out how to tell her.
It doesn’t matter. At least, not as far as that first night goes. I had some trouble putting sentences together, tripped over my words a little. Maybe Freudian slips. Who knows?
But there came a point when I had to really look into her eyes, and measure her response to me. I made her tell me that she wanted out of Pack City, that I’d done the right thing. As much as I felt that we should be together--despite what Hood or the losers wanted--I felt a need to do for her. I think it would have killed me, at that moment, to take her back. I had been saving up for a good princess fucking, remember? A whole lot of emotional build-up, as well as the physical issues. And then, after all that wait, there was--that something.
I didn’t really understand the emotions running through me. I’d never been in love before. And I’d never had such a gamut of hormones. It was all making me haywire, tying my tongue. I tried to sort it all out, take my time. So I explored her body a little, let the crinos monster out a bit.
That part of me wanted to sniff her, feel and taste her body fluids, the juices that made her uniquely her. I remember thinking...the grass is thick, but I wanted a bed, something really soft to lay her down on--to make the first time for her, for us--special. Something more than a hard romp on harder ground. I calculated how far it was to my apartment, but I realized that Hood could storm in on us, even though he’d promised to give me some time with her, if I managed to extricate her from Pack City.
Everything was an ‘if’. If I got her free. If she would have me. If we didn’t get caught after the fact. If the losers or Hood didn’t betray me.
Even if he didn’t, he couldn’t protect me from the natural pack behavior. The bitches, mostly, were vicious in their pursuit of unnaturals and breeder kin.
When I finally went ahead and laid Fera on the ground, I shivered a little at the excitement of taking her, and the unnerving possibility that someone could come upon us while we were in the middle of something--when our defenses were down. Yes, it heightened my excitement.
I prolonged my own tease, maybe too long, by feeling myself, my whole body along the length of her, enjoying the rub of our skin. My cock seemed to glide and glance off her hip, leaving a slickness that felt good to bump against. And Fera, when I reached down to the folds of her labia, she bucked into my hand. Liquid wet my fingers.
The slippery slide of friction when I reached deeper...it was just too much wait for her, I think. She finally reached down and grabbed a hold of my manhood, said something glib, and guided me into her. Still, I wanted it to last, had a sure knowledge that it wasn’t gonna go more than a few hard strokes.
I tried to tell her that I hadn’t done it like that--in crinos, in the open, without a med collar, or an audience. I didn’t go into detail, though. I wanted to savor everything about the freedom I felt. And the way she made me feel. I just can’t seem to express that right.
Men are lousy, as a whole, at saying how they feel.
I couldn’t swallow. I was afraid to move. I wanted more than anything to make it sweet for her.
But she wasn’t having it. Probably her hormones talking as much as her personal preferences. So, even though she’d insisted on me entering her, I tried kissing. Man, was that a fight of the inner beast. I wanted to unleash as much as I wanted to hold on to my humanity.
She reached down, grabbed my ass, spread her legs and pulled me up inside of her further. I couldn’t fight it then.
She kind of clawed her way to a new hold, hanging onto my upper arms. Her fingers dug in when I got her close. I felt her whole body gathering beneath me. Her vaginal muscles clamped down, and I knew she was where she wanted to be.
I wanted to inhale all her moans, I can tell you that. Let them breathe life into me. I thought I was dying.
I’m not going to go into all the details of that night. Let’s just say, I don’t think crinos is my preferred form for lovemaking. If you want the details on how it went, which is a little laughable if you ask me, you’ll have to ask her. All I can say is, who wants a fucking head that swells after you’re done?
Chapter Seven
Finding the spot where Fera and I first made love wasn’t exactly a surprise. It was the pre-agreed rendezvous point that Hood had set up with me, and I, in turn, had set up with the losers. Getting her out of there wasn’t so hard, either, since she went into shifting down about the time we heard the pack coming. With her a little out of it, it was nothing to transport her back to my apartment.
I sat there for hours, drinking--which I almost never do--but am doing more these days--and watching her sleep.
She was in lupus.
Talk about your inner struggles. I thought very seriously about leaving without a forwarding address. Just going out, slipping into the crowd, never turning back. The reason I didn’t do it has nothing to do with the fact that I’m pretty sure Hood’s got a tracking chip in me, somewhere. Lobos is too high tech not to do that. And he had virtually told me they were doing that sort of thing.
4: Jack - In The Pack Page 10