The building manager refused to say a word. The other residents either had never met the girls or had been on vague hi-in-the-hallway terms, and no one knew where they’d gone.
At the vet school, he lingered in the main foyer, hoping to catch a glimpse of Kate, Leesa or Deanna, but apparently they’d dropped off the face of the planet, and none of the other students were talking, either.
At the end of the day, when he caught a glimpse of his unshaven face and wild hair in the storefront window of a nearby pizza place, he finally understood why.
Someone behind him chuckled. “I’m not sure if you look like a serial killer or something left over after a buffalo stampede. What happened to you?”
He turned to find one of Kate’s classmates—a lanky guy named Phil—standing there with a pizza box and a liter of Coke. The pizza—probably a double pepperoni, given the amazing aroma wafting from the box—reminded Jared that he hadn’t eaten since last night, and his stomach growled. “I’ve had kind of a rough day. Have you seen Kate?”
“That would depend on who’s asking and why.” Phil’s smile vanished. “What’s it to you?”
“I just really want to find her, that’s all.”
Phil’s eyes narrowed to a challenging glare. Jared was suddenly glad the burly kid had his arms full, because he looked as if he wanted to land a sucker punch on Jared’s jaw.
“You’re the guy who dumped her!”
“She dumped me. Where are you headed?”
“Dorm.”
Jared eyed the box. An extra-large, easily. “If I pay for half, want to share that pizza? Then I’ll explain, and maybe you can help me out.” He felt for his wallet. “It’d be worth an extra five.”
“Ten.”
“Seven, and that’s final.”
“Whatever.” Phil turned and opened the box on one of the tables set up outside the pizza place. “Help yourself. I bought too much, anyway.”
Jared tossed a ten and a five on the table and picked up a steaming wedge of stuffed crust pepperoni, wrestling with the long ropes of mozzarella. “Kate dumped me, like I said. Big misunderstanding. I’m trying to find her to make things right, but she moved and no one can tell me where. Do you know?”
Phil snorted. “Why would I tell you?”
“Why not?”
“Her friend Leesa is a lab buddy of mine, and the last I heard, she thought you were lower than pond scum. I think she’d deck me if I told you.” He chewed for a while. “Have you seen how powerful she is? I swear the girl could be a wrestler if she tried.”
Jared grinned at the obvious admiration in his voice. “Can you ask her to get word to Kate for me? Tell her that we need to talk.” He shoved the money across the table. “Tell her that I feel even lower than that pond scum, and just want to apologize.”
Phil smiled around a mouthful of pizza. “You got it, but no guarantees. Leesa isn’t a fan of yours...and from the sounds of it, she’s got good cause.”
WHEN HIS PHONE RANG the following night, Jared grabbed it on the second ring. At the sound of Leesa’s subdued voice, he closed his eyes in relief, but it still took nearly fifteen minutes and a lot of fast talking to convince her to share their new address.
“I’d better not regret this,” she warned him. “I’m not sure it’s a good idea at all. If you hurt Kate’s feelings again, I swear you’ll be one sorry dude.”
He smiled into the phone, relieved and impatient to be on his way. “Believe me, Phil already warned me. I’ll be there in a half hour.”
He made it to the old, three-story house overlooking Langford Park in twenty minutes. The house had been divided into apartments, and he took the two inner flights of stairs two steps at a time. At 3-B he dragged in a deep breath and ran his hands through his hair, then rapped on the door.
He blinked when Kate opened the door herself, and just stared at her, forgetting to say hello.
She was thinner now, her cheekbones sharp and her eyes almost too large for her face. She didn’t smile in welcome. “Leesa said you wanted something?”
“I...need to talk to you. Can I come in?”
She hesitated, then nodded and stepped aside. “The living room is to the left. There’s no one else with you?”
“Just me.”
“I heard you were engaged.”
“Briefly. It was a mistake for both of us.”
She sighed and led the way into the living room, where she motioned him to the couch and settled into a tattered upholstered chair across from him, tucking her legs beneath her. “Tough luck.”
“No, good luck. We just weren't right for each other.”
“Seems sort of callous. Did you break the poor girl’s heart?”
“I think she was even more relieved about the breakup than I was. She wants to go back to her old boyfriend." He gave a single shake of his head. “My mother is the one with the broken heart, but then that relationship was mostly her idea.”
Kate laughed at that. “Let me get this straight. You let your mother handle your love life now?”
“Sounds pathetic, doesn’t it? But it wasn’t that. Sheila was on the rebound, and so was I. We connected through the country club back home, and our parents were absolutely thrilled. But it happened way too fast, and ended abruptly, too. My mother, unfortunately, thought it was a match made in heaven.”
Kate eyed him. “You came all the way over here to tell me that? I really don’t want to hear any updates about your romantic adventures.”
“I came because I found out what my mother said to you at Thanksgiving.”
She flinched.
“She had no business interfering, Kate. Nothing she said was true. I only wish I could turn back the clock and make that day disappear.”
“Look, I appreciate that. But your latest failed romance doesn’t mean you can bounce back here and start where you left off. And no matter what your mother said, I have my own reasons why you and I just won’t work. Okay?”
She stood as if to usher him to the door, but he didn’t budge. “You don’t understand.”
“I understand plenty,” she shot back. “Good night, Jared. Have a good life.”
CHAPTER TEN
KATE LEANED HER FOREHEAD against the door, her heart aching.
She hadn’t expected to ever see Jared again, yet she still found herself looking for him at every turn. Foolishly thinking that every tall, dark-haired male student in the distance might be him. That every small black car in a campus parking lot would turn out to be his Mustang.
In her fantasy—one she’d try to dispel—he’d see her, and time would stand still for one long, aching moment. And then he’d come running, begging to come back. They’d be able to work things out, because all of the terrible things in her past wouldn’t matter.
Reality was, no matter how he denied them, his mother’s words still reverberated through her thoughts. And the cold facts remained. They were from different worlds, and her family background would have been an embarrassment, just as Sylvia Mathers said.
And there was nothing Kate could do to change it.
Even after she graduated from college and had DVM behind her name, it wouldn’t be difficult for a reporter to dig up the sordid details of her past.
One of the bedroom doors squeaked and Leesa tentatively peeked out. “Is he gone? Can we come out now?”
Kate raised her arms wide. “Be my guest. The Big Scene is over.”
“Humph.” Deanna stepped into the small central hallway and folded her arms across her chest. “I still think we should’ve confronted him together. The three of us—inquisition style. You know—grill him for a while, then take him to his knees. What kind of guy walks out on one girl and suddenly gets engaged to the next one? Maybe he was two-timing you all along.”
“We weren’t exactly going steady.”
“Yes, you were. Just not in so many words. You were together all the time.”
Leesa stepped past Deanna and into the hallway. “I liked the g
uy, really. And I thought he was totally into Kate from the very start.”
Kate bit her lower lip. “Then—”
A sharp knock sounded at the door and all three of them jumped. Leesa turned and peered through the security peephole. “Incredible timing. Should we just ignore him?”
“Really mature, Leesa—he knows I’m here.” Kate flipped the dead bolt. With her friends at her side, she swung the door open. “Forget something?”
“You.” He looked at the three women, one by one. “And I want to argue my case.”
No one moved.
“First, I wasn’t the one who provided the damaging testimony to...uh...the plaintiff here over Thanksgiving. It was my mother, who didn’t consult with me about my future plans, my current wishes or about my feelings for the woman in question. She was incorrect and, unfortunately, inappropriate in her remarks.”
A sheepish smile played at the corner of his mouth. “Though believe me, I’ve never had any luck at trying to influence her, and neither did my late father.”
When no one said anything, he held Kate’s gaze with his own. “And I’d like to set the record straight. I didn’t want to end our relationship, but you insisted. That failed engagement happened too fast. It was a classic case of rebound. But I wouldn’t care if you had a rap sheet a mile long or if your relatives belonged to the mob. I care about you. Not your family, not your past.”
Kate cast a sideways glance at her roommates. Deanna stared at him with a dreamy expression.
Even Leesa seemed rapt. “Gosh, I think I’d take that explanation, Kate. Works for me.”
Rolling her eyes, Kate grabbed his arm and led him down the stairs to the covered porch, where there’d be some privacy.
“Want my coat?” He brushed a strand of hair away from her cheek. “It’s awfully chilly out here.”
“This won’t take a minute. Look, I really don’t think—”
He rested his hands on her shoulders. “Then don’t think. Just look at me, Kate. Tell me that you don’t believe this could work. That you don’t feel something deep inside...a rush of excitement when you see me, because I sure feel that every time I see you.”
On the way down the stairs, she’d practiced the careful, logical words she should say. They were all swept away as soon as she looked up into his eyes. “I...”
“We’ve got our lives ahead of us, Kate, and right now I just can’t imagine that life without you. Just give us another chance...please?”
“I...”
“Give it a try?”
After a moment’s hesitation, she nodded and stepped into his arms for a heart-melting kiss.
What would it matter if they dated for a while? After graduation, he’d undoubtedly go to work for some fancy law firm in a big city and follow in his dad’s footsteps. She’d end up in a vet practice somewhere out in the country.
And they wouldn’t even last together that long, because the attainable grew boring, and love didn’t last. He’d meet some gorgeous law student or a medical resident, and then he’d be gone.
She’d long since learned not to give her heart away.
PRESENT DAY
Somewhere at the edges of Jared’s consciousness, beyond the fog of pain, he sensed tension. Rushing footsteps. Anxious voices...his mother’s sharp voice rising above the rest. Sylvia?
Clanging metal.
The rattle of wheels. And then he felt...
Alone.
Totally, helplessly alone; as if he were sinking back into a dark, bottomless sea.
The darkness was at once terrifying and a place of refuge from the pounding, intolerable pain that swelled and throbbed inside his head with every deafening beat of his heart.
Still, he tried to swim up out of the depths of that black velvet place that inexorably pulled him back. A place where nothing was familiar, yet somehow it offered the lure of total and everlasting peace.
He struggled to focus on a faint voice.
Familiar, yet completely foreign...drifting toward him through an incomprehensible world, spurring brief, fragile images of a child.
A slow dance in the moonlight.
Memories of love, and joy...and gut-wrenching grief.
A dim flicker of light appeared, then slithered away like an eel...too elusive to catch, leaving a fresh surge of bone-shattering pain ricocheting inside his skull.
He slipped back into the depths, giving himself to its dark embrace, letting reality fade away like sunlight filtering through the water as one dived deeper and deeper.
Oblivion offered respite from the confusion and pain that had been pressing on him from every side, threatening to smother him.
Had it been hours? Days? Months?
How long had he been like this?
Tires squealed. The deafening sound of twisting, shearing metal exploded in his head, followed by the acrid smell of burning rubber. Gasoline. Then the searing flames of hell, and a woman’s screams that went on, and on, and on...
The terrifying nightmare spun through him in a dizzying rush...then slowed, coiling around his heart like a cold, massive snake of guilt, squeezing tighter and tighter.
Oh, Lord. What have I done?
THE PAST
Jared paced the sidewalk in front of the big old house. He’d walked around the block twice, barely noticing the couples playing touch football over by the tennis courts or the kids awkwardly rolling giant balls of snow into lopsided snowmen.
Barely aware of the mid-January sub-zero windchill that was dropping steadily as the sun lowered in the sky.
After seeing Kate every day for weeks, he should have found it easy to lope up that flight of stairs and knock on her door. But an inner voice held him back, repeating a litany that had been part of his life since the day his father died. You know what your responsibilities are. To yourself, to your sister.
Responsibility.
Duty.
At sixteen, he’d shouldered that and more without a second thought. At twenty-two, the choice no longer seemed so narrow. He would do everything he could to help, but not at the cost of a loveless marriage or a career he’d never wanted.
With a jerk of his shoulders, he pivoted and headed straight for the house, feeling drawn by an invisible force.
He came face-to-face with Kate at the front door.
Clearly surprised, she opened it wide and stepped out onto the porch. She dropped her backpack and, resting her hands on his shoulders, rose on her tiptoes to give him a swift kiss.
Before she could step back, he caught her in his arms and spun her around, then gave her a kissed her until she sank against him. Breathless and weak-kneed himself, he finally tucked her head beneath his chin and held her in an embrace...and wished there was it to happen.
Kate always just grinned and stepped back, with gentle reminders about her future, her goals—adamant that she wasn’t going to let anything stand in her way.
She tilted her head up at him. “I looked out and saw your car a while ago, but you didn’t come upstairs. I started to wonder if you’d gotten lost.”
“I’ve been finding myself.”
She laughed, her golden-brown eyes sparkling in the late-afternoon sun. “How New Age of you. If you were successful, we should probably head out to the library.”
He shouldered her backpack and grabbed her hand. “Not quite yet. I need to show you something.”
“But—”
“It’s not far.” He slanted a look at her. “I think you’ll like it.”
She gave him a questioning glance, but followed him to his car and got in after stowing her backpack in the backseat. “Give me a hint.”
“Nope.”
“Animate or inanimate?”
“Not telling.” He started the car and turned up the heater, then popped in her favorite Bonnie Raitt CD.
“C’mon,” she wheedled, giving his arm a playful punch. “I made fettuccini for you last night.”
He sighed, not taking his eyes from the narrow, snowy st
reets. “Okay. It’s both.”
“It can’t be!”
He lifted a shoulder. “That’s your clue.”
“You are not,” she countered dryly, “very good at giving clues.”
“Well, here’s the next one.” He turned up Oak and stopped in front of a small story-and-a-half stucco with overgrown evergreens crowding the front yard. A pathway carved through high snow-banks led to an arched door with a narrow, vertical glass window. “Come with me.”
He rounded the car and opened her door, then steadied her with a hand on her arm as she climbed out of the car. He ushered her up the sidewalk.
“You know these people?”
“Not exactly.”
Her mouth dropped open when he sorted through the keys on his ring and fitted one into the door lock. “Are...they expecting you?”
“Nope.” He pushed the door open and waved her in. “I think they’re probably in sunny Florida by now, happily enjoying their retirement.”
Her mouth twitched, then she grinned. “You’re renting this place? We’ll practically be neighbors!”
They stepped into the small living room with dark hardwood floors and an old-fashioned archway leading into a small dining area. “This place is so cool.”
“There’s something else.” He tipped his head toward a short hall leading through the center of the house to the rooms obviously remaining—a kitchen, bath and bedroom. “Lead the way.”
She grinned mischievously. “I’m not that easy.”
“Believe me, no one would ever accuse you of that. Go out the back door to the screened porch.”
“A porch?” Her eyes lit up. “It just gets better and better.”
Something rustled out on the porch when she touched the door handle. “I hope you don’t have raccoons out there—they’ll destroy your screens.”
A yip sounded, followed by plaintive whines and a scrabbling at the door. She opened the door and knelt just in time to catch the blond ball of fur that launched itself at her. Overwhelmed by the wriggling mass of puppy, she fell back and scooted against the entryway wall, ruffling the pup’s fur and laughing in delight at his kisses.
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