by Tee Smith
“Really Ash.”
“Okay, I'll see what I can do,” Asha laughed. Of course, she loved her brother, but she had never thought of him as a 'spunk'. She guessed that was a bit the way with siblings, though.
“We need you on the floor today Asha,” came Maria's voice from behind her. “We are two nurses down, do you think that will be okay? I'll have Gemma reschedule your appointments.”
Asha looked to Gemma, who had her hand over her lips. She knew she was trying not to laugh, while Asha loved working clinical shifts, she hated few things more than cancelling appointments and Gemma knew full well what she was thinking.
Rather than say what she really wanted to say to Maria, she nodded her head and went to her office to see if she had a spare pair of scrubs to get changed into.
***
The best part about having Patrick stay was his cooking skills. Asha had no idea how he was so good and she was so bad, but she was enjoying having him cook for her. Every night, she would get home to a table filled with a delicious meal. Even Xavier managed to get an evening off to come for dinner one night.
Patrick seemed to be settling in, sleeping on the couch every night. Every time Asha tried to bring up him getting a job and finding his own place, he would change the subject. She did not want to push too much, knowing he was upset over what had happened with Hannah. Joanie didn’t seem to mind having him around either and she wasn't chasing after him. That she was grateful for, as she did not think she could cope with having Patrick following Joanie around like a lost puppy. Joanie did not do relationships. Patrick as far as Asha knew, did not do one-nighters.
He was such a beautiful soul, deep thinking. On the surface he was a lovable larrikin, always laughing and joking. But under his hardened exterior, Asha knew he was a scarred little boy. Just as scarred as her, maybe worse.
Asha carried a lot of guilt about leaving Patrick alone with their mother. He had been the same age when she moved to the city as she had been when they lost their dad. They had been close, he was her little Tricky.
They had stayed in touch over the years, not as much as Patrick would have liked and Asha knew she could have made more of an effort. Life just gets busy. Plus going back home to see Patrick, would also mean having to face her mother. She shuddered at the thought. The less she had to do with that woman the better.
“So Friday night Trick?”
“Friday night Ash?”
“We, as in me and the girls, are going to Xavier's club, they have a band playing, are you in?”
“Ahh, well...” he mused rubbing his chin. “I’d have to check my schedule.”
Asha laughed, “Yes baby brother because you have so many cool things to do right?”
“Well, I might,” Patrick grinned. “What’s in it for me?”
“Aw, just the company of your favourite sister, her amazing friends, and her sexy boyfriend.”
“Not sure if Xavier does it for me, sis,” he chided.
“Good,” Asha laughed. “I’m glad about that.”
“I'm glad you finally found someone Ash,” he said eyeing her seriously.
“Why cause you were worried you old sister would end up a spinster? Left on the shelf?”
“Yep, pretty much,” he huffed out a laugh.
“You're a shit head Trick,” she laughed wrapping her arms around his neck. “Lucky I love you.”
“Well I am pretty lovable, I don't know how you have managed all these years without me being around.”
That was her Patrick, Asha thought. A lovable cheeky shit head.
Chapter 17
PATRICK ORDERED ANOTHER ROUND OF drinks and brought them to the table, spilling them as he attempted to put them down. Joanie jumped to her feet and took what she could from his hands to save any more spillage.
“Go home glasses, you're drunk,” Patrick laughed.
“Oh Tricky, I think you're the one who's drunk,” Asha laughed, reaching across the table to secure her drink.
“So Ashy-girl,” Patrick was starting to slur just a little. “I was thinking, maybe you and I should go pay mum a visit this weekend.”
“Nope, not happening,” Asha shook her head, eyes down, suddenly finding the table very interesting, not wanting to make eye contact with Patrick. Maybe if she ignored him, he would let it go.
The table lurched forward and the liquid from the latest round of drinks threatened to spill across its surface as Patrick slammed his open hand down. Asha jerked her head up in surprise. She found Patrick's eyes across the table and glared at him.
“I'm not getting into this with you here right now Trick. We'll talk about it later okay?”
“No, I want to talk about it right now,” he roared and all within ear-shot quieted as they turned to see what the chaos was all about.
Joanie reached out and put her hand on Patrick's forearm in an attempt to soothe him, but it was too late for that. He harshly brushed Joanie's hand away, leaving her with a shocked expression.
“We are out Patrick, having drinks with friends,” Asha gestured around the table, as the crowd returned to their conversations and drinks. Excitement for them apparently over. “What about we talk about it tomorrow yeah?” she pleaded.
“I just want to know what makes you think you're so fuckin' great that you don't have to go home and see your own mother?” his eyes almost a mirror of her own bore into hers.
She stood and walked around to his side of the table, taking his hand, in hers, she coaxed him from his chair.
“You want to have this out now? Well not here, not in front of everyone. Let's go outside. Come on.”
Patrick smirked at that, “Why are you embarrassed? Think your friends will find out what you're really like? Find out that you’re not the kind, caring person you make out to be?” he sneered.
“Outside now, Patrick,” Asha demanded raising her voice through clenched teeth. Pointing towards the front door, she spun on her heel and charged toward it hoping Patrick would follow her.
They stepped out into the frosty night air. The parking area was illuminated with bright overhead lights and nearby street-lamps. It was quiet however, no one else around save for a couple near the edge of the building who appeared to be sharing a cigarette and a joke.
“Now Patrick, I would much prefer to have this conversation with you sober, but as you insist on having it now, let's go.” Asha was trying to keep her voice calm, but her heart beat hard in her chest, she was angry at Patrick starting this argument whilst they were out with her friends.
“I just don't get you Asha,” Patrick ran both hands through his locks. “You have not been home for years. Mum misses you, she talks about you all the time.”
“Mum knows where I am,” she hissed.
“So why should she be the one to come looking for you? You're her daughter for fucks sake.”
“Yeah and she's my mother. Our mother Patrick. And when was the last time she acted like it?”
“You never gave her a chance,” Patrick cried pitifully.
Asha scoffed, “She had plenty of chances, she was just too busy off getting pissed, high or jumping into someone else's bed, to bother with being a mother.”
“She was grieving for dad.”
“Yeah, the poor grieving widow, do you know how long it took for her to find someone else, Patrick? Do you?”
Patrick was silent, looking down at the bitumen and shuffling his feet. She took a step closer, getting right in his face so there was no chance he could miss hear her.
“The night of his funeral Trick. Our mum brought a man home on the night of her precious husband’s funeral, our dad’s funeral Patrick. And you're going to stand here and tell me, poor mum was grieving?”
Asha was so furious, her blood was pumping in her ears, she was only vaguely aware of the club doors opening and patrons moving in and out. They were gathering an audience.
“Our mum was a big fat, lying, cheating, drunken slut,” she yelled, so furious with him, she ha
d given up caring who saw or heard her.
Patrick lunged at her seizing her shoulders with both hands, his face distorted by the shadows of the night and his anger.
“Like mother, like daughter, hey Sis?”
Suddenly her shoulders were released and Patrick was hauled backwards away from her. With a sickening thud, she saw Xavier, taller than Patrick by several inches, thrust him against the wall of the building. She saw a look of shock, followed closely by realisation flood across Patrick's face just before she saw Xavier's fist connect with Patrick's jaw. A howl of pain emanated from Patrick's broken mouth as blood began to spurt from the split Xavier's punch had left on Patrick's lip. Followed by another sickening thud as Xavier's fist connected with her baby brother's stomach.
“Don't you ever, ever speak to my girl like that again, do you hear me you low-life piece of scum?” Xavier's voice was cold, hard, and calculating.
The tone of his voice made her blood run cold, she had never heard him sound like that. She rushed toward the men. Xavier had Patrick pinned against the wall, with his forearm against his chest, holdiing him in place.
Patrick had never been much of a fighter. In school, Asha had to stick up for her brother on many occasions when the school bully had bailed him up. It wasn't that he was not physically able, he had been blessed with a naturally muscular physique, but he was such a quiet, gentle soul. He was the kind of person who always saw the good in everyone. A bit of a rascal, often getting into mischief, but never any serious trouble.
Now Asha saw pain and confusion pass across her brother's face. It hurt her as much as it was hurting him. Yes, he had said nasty things to her, but she loved him all the same and it had been in the heat of the moment. She knew he had not meant to hurt her, which just was not his way.
“Let him go, Xavier,” she shouted with all she could, tears springing to her eyes. “Leave him alone.”
Xavier relaxed his arm hold on Patrick’s chest and looked to her. Asha was suddenly aware of the crowd that had begun to mill around them. Watching the show.
“Really Ash?” he raised his brows at her. “You expect me to just let him speak to you like that?”
“He's my brother Xave, you don't just get to go all Neanderthal on him.” Asha reached out and grabbed Patrick's arm, tugging him to herself in a protective manner.
“C'mon bud, let's get you home hey?” she soothed. Patrick didn't respond, he just stood dead still staring daggers at Xavier. The gathering of people parted as she tugged Patrick across the car park. Her arm wrapped protectively around her brother's waist.
“Ash...baby,” she heard Xavier call but did not look back.
As luck would have it a taxi pulled into the lot, just at that moment. She ushered Patrick in, before turning to see Xavier holding the car door.
“Not now Xave', I can't deal with you right now,” she shook her head.
“I couldn't stand by and let him talk to you like that Ash,” Xavier pleaded.
“Just save it Xave' I have to get Trick home and cleaned up.” She wrenched the door from his grip and slammed it closed behind her as she settled into the car for the trip home. Just like his father, settling things with his fists, she thought to herself. She could not cope with that. She knew she had been wrong getting involved with this man. Any man, she was better off alone. What had she been thinking?
***
“I'm sorry Sis, you know I didn't mean it,” Patrick begged, as Asha wiped at his wounds with some antiseptic-soaked gauze. All were superficial thankfully, she would not have been happy if she had to take him into the emergency department for stitches. That would have meant having to explain to her colleagues how she had gotten caught up in this situation.
“I know mate,” she consoled.
“I didn't know mum brought someone home the night of dad’s funeral.”
“It doesn't matter now, really does it?”
“I missed you so much when you left you know?” Patrick's voice was so broken, it made Asha's heart hurt. “I know she was never a good mum, but she did love us. She still loves us.”
“She always loved you Trick.”
“And you too Ash.”
“Just not as much,” Asha sighed.
“Alright,” she patted him gently on the side of his chest. “You're done, go have a shower, you can sleep in my bed tonight if you want.”
“No, I'm not taking your bed,” he argued.
He had been sleeping on her couch for weeks now.
“You're hurt Trick and it's my fault,” she fought back a sob, as the memory of Xavier's fists pounding into her brother came flooding back. “I'm so sorry Xavier did this to you.”
Patrick let out a bitter laugh, “I kinda deserved it, and I should never have spoken to you like that.”
“Yeah, I guess you kinda did,” Asha let a small laugh escape her lips. “But honestly kiddo, I never expected Xavier to behave like that.”
“I don't know, I think you should be kind of proud that you have found a man that would defend your honour like that. Dad would have liked him.”
“You think?” Asha really wished her dad was around to be able to have an opinion. Just having Patrick tell her, he thought their dad would have liked him, made her heart swell.
“Yeah, I think he's a keeper Ash, don't let him get away,” he winked, leant over and placed a kiss on her cheek. “Thanks for fixing me up Ashy-girl. I love you, good night”
“Night bud, see you in the daylight.”
Asha cleaned up the mess she had made, tipped the rubbish into the bin, squashing it down with her hands, as no one had emptied it for days. Washed her hands, grabbed a bottle of cold water from the fridge and headed for bed. Reaching out to put her phone on her nightstand she noticed two missed calls and three new messages from Xavier.
X-Baby I'm sorry
X-Asha? We need to talk about it.
X-Maybe tomorrow? Good night X
Asha switched her phone off. Then the light.
Chapter 18
ASHA LAY IN BED FOR hours, but sleep wouldn't come. The events of the night running over and over in her head. Ghosts of the past, coming back to haunt her. She had spent many years trying not to think about her mother and the events that had finally cleaved their already fragile relationship apart.
His name was James. He had been her mother's boyfriend, although everyone had thought it was ridiculous. James was far too young for her mother at twenty-eight, same age as Asha was now. Asha had been sixteen. Old enough to know it was wrong. But young enough and naive enough to believe James when he told her he loved her and not her mother.
James had been one of the few men her mother had let stay around any longer than one night. Asha and Patrick had both liked him from the start. Especially Asha as he had showered her with attention and constantly told her how beautiful she was. Offered her rides to school in his sports car. Patrick was particularly keen on the little red Mazda RX-7.
Asha was not one of the popular kids at school. More of a bookworm. Studying and reading had been a release for her. When she would get home from school, her mother was most often in a bad mood, or out with her latest 'friend'. Boys hadn't really paid her much attention, so when James had started flirting with her, at first she was not sure what to make of it.
Weeks went by and he was spending more and more time at their house, turning up when he knew her mum would be at work. He was handsome, tall, tanned skin, dark hair, dark eyes. He listened to all the same music she and Patrick did. Watched all the latest movies and played all the latest video games. Asha was really was not into gaming, but Patrick was, and he lapped up the extra testosterone James brought into the house.
It was a period of happiness for their little family after the gloomy days since she had lost her father. Even her mum had seemed to be happy. For a while at least.
What started out innocently on Asha's behalf, did not stay that way for long. She had come home early from school one day upset. A girl she had been f
riends with had turned on her and was now being nasty. Making jokes about her dad dying and her mum being the town bike. Asha had confided in this friend about her concerns for her mum's behaviour, now this friend was spreading it all over the school grounds.
She had left before her last class, knowing her mum would not be home until five pm and if the school called, she would make up an excuse about her period coming early. Mum would believe that, if she even cared to ask.
What Asha had not counted on was finding James at her house when she arrived. She had just turned the key in the lock and pushed the door forward when he appeared from behind it. Asha jumped, feeling frightened at discovering the unexpected house guest.
James had explained he was staying at the house for the day, as his car was being serviced and her house was closer than his. Asha had no idea where James actually lived, it had never come up and right now she was too upset by her own problems to care.
She had meant to go to her room, but James had noticed she had been crying and had asked what had happened. Before long Asha found herself pouring her heart out to him, telling him how much she had missed her mum, since the death of her dad. How even though they shared a house together her mum had been so distant. Then she told him about her day at school. More tears were shed, he had wrapped his arms around her, comforting her and before she knew, he was kissing her.
It was Asha's first kiss, it had felt good. It had felt wrong at first, but she didn't pull away. After that day, she would sneak home early whenever she had to chance and James would wait for her there, or he would pick her up from school and they would go for a drive together. She enjoyed spending time with him. He was kind to her, would listen when she complained about school, her friends, her mother, Patrick. When they were together it felt right to her, like it was meant to be. She hated that James would take her home in the evening and go to bed with her mother, pretending all the while like she was nothing more than his girlfriend's daughter.