by Brandy Blake
Raina frowned slightly. “You know, I was there for all of it, and I remember meeting her, too, for the first time. I haven’t ever said this before but, I never understood why you married her. I mean, she was the only girl that you dated in college, and then you married her. Why didn’t you date anyone else?”
She looked at him curiously, giving voice to a question that had hovered at the back of her mind for a long time.
He looked away and shrugged, and spoke quietly. “There was one girl that I really wanted to be with, but I knew that she probably didn’t want to be with me like that… it just… the timing was off, I guess. I never would have married Cathy if I had ever gotten the nerve up to go for the girl I really wanted, but I missed my chance.
“Cathy decided that she wanted me, and she came after me and wasn’t going to let me go… at least not back then, and since I couldn’t have the girl I wanted, I guess I thought I might as well be with the girl who wanted me. That was Cathy. Of course, we can see now what a poor decision that was.” He shrugged and finished his ice cream.
Raina pursed her lips. “You can’t say that. You couldn’t have known then that she was going to leave you for another woman. You thought she had her whole world wrapped around you. She did… actually, it was kind of annoying, to be honest, but I thought that it would work out. I hoped it would. I wanted you to be happy.”
She frowned a little. “I didn’t know there was another girl that you liked in college. You never said anything. Who was it? Do I know her?” she asked, looking at him.
Aaron blushed and looked away, waving his hand dismissively. “It was a hundred years ago. It doesn’t matter now. Besides, it doesn’t matter what didn’t happen then, what matters is that you and I have still have each other, and we will always have each other, and I wouldn’t trade that for anyone or anything.”
She grinned at him and hugged him tight, and he held her close to him and nestled his face in close to her neck for a long moment, and she heard him breathe her in.
“Come on, let’s get another coffee,” he said quietly. He took her arm in his and walked down the street toward a café.
Raina thought back and wondered who it was that had captured Aaron’s heart all those years before, but she couldn’t remember everyone they had gone to school with, and by the time they were ordering their coffee, she had forgotten all about it.
They left the café and sat outside on a bench beneath a tree. He looked at her closely and changed the subject of their conversation. “How are things going with Michael?”
She nodded. “Things are going well. I really enjoy being around him. There have been some strange things… he got kind of quiet, like I told you, and pulled away, and then I found out that he is raising a teenage girl, and that was really weird for me, but I’m kind of… coming to terms with that. But, other than that, I guess we’re okay. He’s back to the way that he was before, you know… attentive and wanting to talk to me and go places with me, so I guess we’re okay and everything is fine now.”
He stared at her. “He’s raising a teenage girl? Did he not mention that to you at any point?”
She turned and looked at him with a smile of agreement. “See? That’s what I thought, too, when I found out. He should have mentioned that to me. I mean, I get it that we’re keeping our personal lives sort of out of the arrangement, but I felt like that was something that he could have told me about. She’s not his daughter, though… she’s a girl he knows through some acting group, and he thought she had a difficult life, so he took her in and now he’s raising her.”
Aaron frowned. “Really.” He was quiet for a minute. “How old is she?”
“She’s seventeen. Cutest girl… very smart and sweet. I liked her when I met her, but… it’s just a strange circumstance.” Raina frowned a little, too, and took a long pull of coffee from her cup.
He nodded. “Yes, it is. How is he with her?”
One word seared itself into Raina’s mind the instant that Aaron asked her the question. “Protective. He’s protective of her, and very close to her.”
“Huh,” Aaron replied thoughtfully. “Well, I guess whatever works for them… as long as you’re happy. That’s all that matters to me. Are you happy?” he asked, turning and looking at her.
She smiled at him and took his hand in hers. “I am. Thank you. I wish you were, too,” she admitted in a sweet voice.
He stood up and she got up with him, and they began to walk together again. “I’m happy anytime I get to be with you.”
They spent most of the day enjoying the farmers’ market and shops in Los Altos, and later that afternoon they drove back to San Francisco together. She parked in her driveway and they got out of her car.
Aaron hugged her goodbye, holding her close against him a while, and she hugged him in return.
Finally, he lifted his head and gazed at her, his eyes steady on hers. “Thank you so much. You were exactly what I needed. This day was perfect.” He leaned close to her then, and pressed his lips softly to hers, lingering in his kiss a moment before letting her go.
She felt warmth flood all through her as if a dam had been released, and she closed her fingers a little tighter around his arms as she held him, steadying herself as she grew a little breathless. He studied her closely a moment, and then reached up and touched her cheek with the tip of his finger.
“I need to go. I’ll talk to you soon. I love you. Thank you again for today.”
Raina nodded and somehow a smile found its way through the confusion she felt, to her face. “I love you, too, and thank you. I loved being with you today. It was so much fun, and I needed it, too.”
He let her go and a strange sensation washed over her; as if coolness had replaced warmth, and she didn’t want him to leave, but she didn’t say anything. Instead, she watched as he got into his car and gave her a wave, backing out of her driveway and turning down the street. She watched until his car was gone, and then she frowned a little and ran her fingertip over her full lips where his mouth had just left hers.
He had never kissed her on the mouth before, except at Christmas under the mistletoe twice. Once at a party when they were both at in college, and once right before he started dating Cathy. She was amazed at the feelings and sensations that were rolling through her, and she walked silently back into her house, closing the door behind her, and wondering at it all.
It was another half an hour before she reached into her purse and pulled out her cell phone. She was surprised at herself. She hadn’t thought of her cell phone or of Michael or texting him all day. It was completely out of the norm for her, and it caught her off guard when she realized it. She had been so wrapped up in Aaron all day, that the only time that Michael had crossed her mind was when Aaron had asked her about him. She was amazed that it had been that way, and she looked to see if she had any messages from Michael.
There were three from him, and she smiled a little to see them. They were steamy texts. He had been thinking of her, and he was wishing that they were somewhere alone where he could do all sorts of naughty things to her. She looked at the messages and a hollow feeling took over her heart.
It was as if she had sat with a bowl of frosting and eaten the whole thing until she had made herself sick. There was no substance; there was no cake with the frosting to give it foundation and balance, it was just sugar. Hot sweet sugar from Michael, and she was surprised that she hadn’t noticed the feeling before, but after having spent an entire day in Aaron’s company, the sexy texts from Michael seemed transparent and hollow, and she didn’t feel like answering him back the way that she knew he wanted her to.
Instead, she sent a different kind of text. ‘Sorry, phone was off. I was busy today. Just got these.’
A little while later, he texted her back. ‘Hope you had a good day. Missed you! You’re my favorite pleasant distraction.’
She smiled. She liked the idea of being anyone’s favorite. She texted him in return, ‘I missed you, too.�
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He answered a few minutes later with a steamy suggestive text, and the two of them spent the rest of the night going back and forth, teasing and flirting with each other. She was amazed at the way he somehow brought out such a different, passionate part of her that she never knew was there. An uninhibited, adventurous, wild side that she knew she never would have discovered without him. It made her feel vibrant and alive, and while it didn’t feel like there was much substance, she was fascinated with the fire he so easy drew up in her.
Raina was sitting at her computer the next morning when Willow came in to bring her a file on a new startup company that she was considering investing in. Raina looked up at her and gave her a serious look.
“Let me ask you a question…” she began, her eyes narrowed thoughtfully.
Willow sat before her. “Shoot!” she smiled.
“I’ve been thinking about what’s going on with Michael, and I’ll be honest… I’ve started to wonder if maybe there could be something a little more between us than just the affair.” Raina bit at her lower lip.
Willow’s eyes widened. “Are you falling for him?”
Raina shrugged and glanced away for a moment, and then looked back at her assistant. “I think I might be, but I have been fighting that. I don’t want to fall for him; that’s not part of our deal, but there’s just something about him. He’s bringing out aspects of me that I didn’t even know were there, and I just wonder… if there was more between us, would it be even better than it is now?”
Willow pressed her lips together thoughtfully. “I’d say that you should talk with him about it. I mean, a relationship… a real relationship where you’re both committed to each other, is a two part, two-way street, right? So, if you’re thinking about changing that between the two of you, then you need to talk to him about it and get his side of things. Get his take. See if that’s something that he wants as well, because if it’s just you, then toss it out the window and forget about it, but if he thinks it might be a good idea, too, then it might happen. You should just talk with him about it.”
“Yes, I should. You’re absolutely right about all of that, Will,” Raina answered as thoughts of her and Michael discussing it began to blaze through her mind.
“There’s just one thing, though…” Willow added in a serious tone.
Raina looked back at her. “What’s that?”
Willow leaned forward, her eyes intent on Raina’s. “He’s got a kid. You didn’t want a family. You’d be starting something with a man who is raising a teenage girl. Now, granted, this girl is seventeen and she might take off when she turns eighteen, or whatever, who knows how long she will live with him, but there is definitely that to consider. He’s not a single guy on his own; he’s a package deal. Think about that before you make a decision. Talk with him, too, but think about that while you’re considering all of it.”
Raina nodded in agreement. “Always thinking logically… thank you, Willow. I appreciate it.”
Chapter8
Raina gave it considerable thought, and decided that she did want to talk with Michael about it. Willow was right; they needed to discuss the possibility of there being more between them together, because it would be coming from both sides if it happened. She also knew that Willow had been right about her taking on a true romantic relationship with a man who had a teenage girl living with him. That was a big responsibility not only for Michael, but it would totally change the dynamic of her relationship with Michael if they did go forward with sharing more between them. Joanna would be involved in it, there would be no question of that.
She asked Michael to meet her at the café where they had first met each other, and he was glad to do it. She went early and was thinking carefully about everything that she wanted to discuss with him when he arrived.
He embraced her closely and gave her a soft, warm kiss before sitting down beside her. “How are you doing?” he asked, looking optimistically cautious about why they might be meeting at a café.
“I’m good.” She smiled at him. “I just thought that it would be nice to visit and talk. I’m glad you came.”
He nodded and reached for his coffee. “Of course. I love getting to see you.”
She nodded. “I love seeing you, too. I wanted to ask you about working as an escort like you do. Why is it that you’re doing that? I mean… is there anything else that you’d rather be doing?”
He shrugged. “Well, in a perfect world I’d be an actor full time, but getting full time acting work is almost impossible unless you’re a big name celebrity. The escort work brings in a fair amount of money, and that’s the most important thing. I do it for Joanna, so that I can provide for her.”
Raina listened carefully and took in everything that he was saying. “Is it something that you would quit doing if you could?”
Michael tilted his head as he regarded her, looking curious about why she was asking him the things that she was. He shook his head. “I wouldn’t quit. I need to make more money so that I can give Joanna all the things that she wants, and all of the things that I want for her. I want to spoil her all that I can.”
“Well, I can certainly understand that,” Raina replied, knowing that he was wondering about her line of questions. She knew that the time had come for her to open up about what she was really there for.
“It’s just that I’ve been wondering… well… things seem to be changing between us, don’t you think? Have you noticed that? That things are changing a lot between us?” She put the question to him, hoping that he would open up and tell her what he was feeling and thinking about the two of them.
Realization came over his face and he nodded and sighed a little. “I see. Raina, I know we don’t really talk about it, but I feel like I need to remind you that you’re not the only woman that I see through the escort service. I do date other women. You’re not the only woman I’m seeing.”
She sighed quietly. “I do know that,” she answered in a soft voice. She had put it from her own mind enough that she hadn’t thought about it for a while, and she didn’t want to think about it, but she did know it. She paused in her train of thought, wondering if there would ever be a way they could be together, or a reason for them to be together.
Raina looked at him again. “If you didn’t have to work as an escort, would you still want to see other women?” It was a question that begged a definitive answer, and that she should probably base everything that she was thinking about with him on whatever he told her. It would clarify his genuine feelings for her.
He didn’t answer right away, but when he did, his dark brown eyes held hers in a steady gaze and his voice was even. “I don’t know,” he said simply.
She began to wonder if he felt the same way for her that she was beginning to feel for him. It wasn’t obvious to her just how he did feel about her, and she wasn’t entirely sure just how solid the footing was on the ground that they shared.
He leaned closer to her then and rested his hand on her knee, giving it a soft squeeze. “I will say this, though. No one turns me on as much or as fast as you do.”
Little electric tingles blazed up her thigh and that familiar ache for him warmed inside of her. She smiled at him. “Ditto,” she answered simply.
He leaned back in his chair and winked at her. She reminded herself then that he was just there for fun, for a hot affair, and for nothing else. She knew that she wasn’t supposed to feel anything for him, and she reminded herself that it just wasn’t part of the bargain.
She had to remain fair to herself and to him. They were in a heated and passionate business arrangement, and that was all that there was to it. From where she was sitting just then, it felt like that might be all there was to it, and she tried to tell herself that that was fine, and that it would be enough. Her growing feelings needed to be kept in check, especially if she didn’t want to get hurt.
***
Raina got off a business call at her desk and called through the open office door
to Willow, who was sitting just on the other side of it. “I am going to Seattle on Thursday for business. I’ll be gone until Sunday.”
Willow was quiet only a moment before she asked back, “Before I book it, will you be taking Michael with you?”
Raina smiled. “I don’t know… we had a conversation and I talked with him about what’s going on between us. I kind of feel like maybe that isn’t going quite the way that I thought it was. I’m not sure if I’m going to take Michael on this trip.”
“So you’re going alone?” she asked in reply.
Raina leaned back in her chair and rubbed her forefinger over her lower lip thoughtfully. “You know what, let me get back to you on that. I’ll let you know tomorrow.”
She reached for her phone and saw a saucy message from Michael waiting for her. She smiled and instead of answering it right away, she began a new message, and sent it off to Aaron. ‘Would you like to come with me to Seattle for a few days? Leaving Thurs coming back Sun. My treat.’