by W. A. R.
“Who else do you think would come save your sorry ass?” she asked on a laugh and suddenly Buddy’s arms were around her, squeezing her tightly, smearing his blood on her clothes, against her hair. She didn’t even seem to notice. Miles tightened his hold on Lacy and closed his eyes. He felt the monster within him growing, and he wondered why it had stayed hidden for so long. Had it taken his believing her dead for this to happen? Or even, having lost her, having been taken away from her by Lance and the others…had that been his trigger? Either way he didn’t like it. He felt…possessive…overprotective. “Can’t…Breathe…” Amber choked out before Buddy released her. And then it happened. She looked over Buddy’s shoulder to Miles. He watched as her eyes trailed over where his fingers gripped Lacy’s arm to how close his chest was to her back. The smile faded from her face and he witnessed something flash across her face for an instant before her eyes turned from the two of them. He looked on; an uneasy feeling settling in his gut when he realized her eyes hadn’t met his. She needed to speak with him, he could see it. But could he really say everything that he needed to say? Could he express how angry he was that he had begged her not to come after them and then she had…died…doing exactly what he begged her not to? Could he express the pain and frustration he felt at simply having lost her? He wasn’t sure, but that wasn’t what mattered then…not yet. Even still, she would need to talk first. She was hurting, he knew it; she was hurting and angry too. And just like always, he would make her talk first, make her pain lessen before he even considered easing his own. She looked at Buddy as Riley helped Rusty regain his footing. “What in the hell was going on here?”
Buddy wiped some blood from his chin to the back of his hand. “She tried to leave, go find Miles. I, uh…I wouldn’t let her. She didn’t like it. What happened to you?” He stated and Amber sighed in frustration before Rusty released a pain filled groan. Amber quickly turned to him, concern etched into her features.
“Oh Rusty…are you alright?” she asked, avoiding Buddy’s question, rushing up to the other side of him and slinging his other arm over her shoulders.
“S…Fine…tweet…tweet.” Rusty stammered out, laughing lightly. Amber sighed and looked at Riley before nodding and turning back to Buddy.
“Well, it seems as if she got her wish.” Her eyes hovered once again over Miles and Lacy and Miles immediately released his hold on Lacy. She turned back so quickly to Buddy that he had almost imagined her looking their way. “We need to get you both inside to have a seat. Come on…we can talk about what happened in here.” She ushered them all before turning with Riley to help a stumbling Rusty into the house. She glanced over her shoulder. “Will someone go help Shelly?”
“I’m right here and I’m fine. Quit fussing over me. Damn.” Shelly said hotly as she approached them. Michael reached a hand out to her and she waved him off before tossing a heated glare from her tired eyes at Lacy. Miles stayed behind and picked up her swords, feeling their lightness in his hands. How had she gotten these? When had she learned to use them? Shelly ambled up the stairs, her attitude still huffy. Uh-oh, Miles thought; he just got Amber back, they were all safe, and now Lacy, one person he had helped, decided to pull a stunt like this? This was a wonderful start to the rest of the day.
Still, despite all of this he followed them all, the last one to enter the house. It was weird, he thought as he looked around taking in the artificial light and the cleanliness of the house. It was weird to switch from being homeless and struggling for life alone mere hours before to standing in a living room with lights, water, and people he had thought he had lost. It was as if none of that hell that they had endured had ever happened. He watched as Amber and Riley led Rusty to the couch before depositing him. Buddy followed suit, sitting beside Rusty and tilting his head back, trying to stop the flow of blood. Miles grimaced and turned to the kitchen, searching for something to help him. After a quick search, he found a hand towel and reentered the living room, watching as Amber scooted the coffee table closer to the two men, her knees brushing theirs and her eyes intent on their wounds. Michael stood directly behind her and Riley had disappeared somewhere within the depths of the house that Miles had yet to survey. He stepped forward quickly, pushing past a wide-eyed Lacy and to Amber. She glanced up at his hands with questioning eyes as he held out the towel to her as well as her swords. She gratefully took the swords and sheathed them before reaching for the towel and she stood, leaning over Buddy, and forcing his hand down.
She winced. “Damn she did a number on you.” Amber stated easily, trying to lighten the mood. She shifted on her feet and he stomped the heel of his own foot as she pressed the towel under his nose. “Keep that on until it stops bleeding and then I’ll take a look at it.” She told him before moving and leaning over Rusty.
Miles watched every move she made, his eyes focusing on her deft fingers as she examined the gash on Rusty’s cheek and the dark bruise and swelling that had begun to darken his features. It was so unbelievable, what had happened, and even more so that they were all there. He wanted to believe it was a dream, or even some horrible nightmare, but he knew that it wasn’t and he needed rest and quiet in order to come to terms with what all of this entailed.
“‘She’ has a name,” he heard Lacy say, her tone of voice cross, and she crossed her arms, exuding her defiance to Amber. Miles narrowed his eyes at her, questioning why she was even in there to begin with. Amber’s fingers immediately stilled on Rusty’s head and he saw the slightest tremble in her legs, and her hands, just the slightest quiver and he wondered then when the last time she actually had any rest was…or even had eaten for that matter. Slowly, she turned to face Lacy and she squared her shoulders. She was so intimidating, he thought then, so very changed. Where was the smile and the laugh? Where was the carefree and loving spirit that was her? Where was his angel in the darkness?
‘I can’t imagine what you went through and I am so sorry you had to go through it alone.’ Her words to him that day beside the pond echoed in his ears.
“Quite frankly I don’t care. You physically assaulted two of my friends while trying to go after another. Your name is completely irrelevant to me right now.” Amber told her and Lacy squared her shoulders, narrowing her eyes defensively. Amber held her calm stare.
“And just who in the hell are you?” she spat vehemently and Miles took a step forward, his own anger playing at the edges, burning them, blurring the lines that should be there telling him which lines to cross and which were better left alone. Amber took a few decisive steps towards her, stepping over Buddy’s feet until Miles reached forward with an extended hand on her shoulder. Amber stopped and leveled her gaze.
“Amber. Amber McDermott and this is my family. Unless you want your ass kicked again I suggest you shut your mouth.” Amber told her and there was no missing the widening of Lacy’s eyes as she took in this information. She quickly took a step back. Miles tightened his hold on Amber’s shoulder as Lacy glanced from him to her, covering her mouth with her hand. She didn’t say anything more and Amber waited a long challenging moment, waiting for a response that she knew she wasn’t going to get. She then turned to Miles and he dropped his hand from her shoulder reluctantly. It was quick, that unspoken moment in which her eyes met his and he wanted nothing more than to take her in his arms and never let her go again. He couldn’t do that, however; he knew that he couldn’t and so he let her turn away from him and back to Buddy and Rusty. She reached forward and shoved Buddy’s head back before stepping over his legs and assisting Riley with tending to Rusty’s wound. She glanced at Buddy. “So, what in the hell happened?”
Buddy groaned through the towel before pointed casually at Lacy. “She got cleaned up and wanted to go find Miles. I told her that it wasn’t happening because he was talking with his son and he needed some time alone.” He winced and shifted the towel under his nose. “She wouldn’t take no for an answer and that is when you all came along.”
Amber glanced back at R
usty. “Lean back and relax. You need to come to your senses.” She straightened and placed both hands on her hips, turning her attention back to Buddy. “Why didn’t you hit her back like you did me?” Amber asked chuckling, though it was forced.
“I learned my lesson about hitting women last time I tussled with you.” He told her, his words muffled from the towel. She rolled her eyes and spared a look at Miles before looking at Lacy. “She’s alright, you know. She just didn’t want to listen. Don’t be so hard on her.”
Amber glanced up at Lacy with some traces of uncertainty in her eyes. “So…she arrived with you all?” she asked and her eyes then shifted to Miles. He swallowed thickly. What did she need to feel better? What could he give her to take away that weakness and vulnerability, that uncertainty that she was feeling towards him? He didn’t like it. They had come so far and this was not the time for her be weary of him…but the question was…why was she weary of him? Then again, he was also weary of her for his own reasons; because he was angry and confused and so very desperate to have her back that he had to stop himself from acting on any base urges that came to him.
Michael nodded, crossing his arms across his broad chest. “Her and her sister. Her name is Lacy and her sister is Chloe. They were held captive with dad, Brian, and Shelly.” He told her and there was no missing the way she stilled at the mention of Brian’s name, or even possibly the memories that had to have invaded her mind. “They helped get the two of them out when they made a run for it so they came with them…here.” Amber again looked at Miles, her eyes asking him a million questions that he didn’t have the answers for. She let her arms hang loose at her sides before turning back to Buddy. She couldn’t even bring herself to look at him for too long before she distanced herself, Miles realized.
“That is so wonderful…really.” She glanced at Lacy. “I apologize for my behavior…I just…” and Miles saw the war in her eyes as she tried to explain why she had been so protective and angry. Lacy saw this and offered her a smile.
“I understand. These people are your family and you are so very lucky. I have heard so much about you.” Lacy’s eyes drifted to Miles and Amber’s followed. He suddenly felt heat crawl up his neck at Amber’s inquisitive stare. Lacy turned back to Amber. “And I must say…after witnessing everything that happened and hearing Michael explain your plan…it is an honor to meet you. Really.”
“Um…” Amber began uncertain. She seemed uncomfortable with Lacy’s words. “Thank you…I guess.” Amber quickly sat down on the coffee table and ran both hands across her face vigorously and Miles took a step towards her, wanting to reach out to her. Her gloveless fingers ran through her short hair and finally she turned back to Buddy, her eyes flicking from him to Shelly. Why couldn’t she look at Miles? “How…um…” she tried to speak, twisting her fingers together in a nervous knot and biting her lip. She was on the verge of tears. She heaved a heavy sigh, closing her eyes. “How…how mad…upset…are you two? The others?” And they all shared looks with one another, knowing then that Lacy’s mention of her plan had struck a chord within her. Miles felt as if he had been slapped and he stopped on his way to comfort her. Didn’t she want to know what he thought of it? Didn’t she want to know if he was upset with her as well? With those questions raging in his mind he stepped back removing his hand from where it hovered near her.
Shelly was the first to speak. Her hand rested on her abdomen, and she was crying. “We thought you had died. Of course we were upset. Brian was taken away…” her words were cut off by a sob and Amber lowered her head into her hands, letting her own tears escape from her eyes. “And we thought you were gone too…”
Buddy leaned forward and lowered his hand, removing the towel from his face and he reached for her, and then thought better of it. Miles was thankful for this, because he was feeling hurt and angered then, and if she had allowed him to touch her so casually, no…so intimately, he was afraid he would have lost his cool façade right then and there. Buddy cleared his throat. “Amber…we watched you tumble over that edge. All of us…and it hurt. Cassie and…” He hesitated, looking at Miles’s stern expression. “Cassie and Miles took it the hardest I think. Bobby-Jean was just kind of numb.”
Amber looked up between Buddy and Shelly, wiping the tears from her eyes, still refusing to look at Miles. “I had to…it was…”
“For our safety…we know…but it didn’t lessen the pain.” Shelly interceded between her tears. “But I must say…hearing that it was all a lie and you are alive is the biggest, sweetest relief there is…because knowing you…you have a plan to get Brian back and then…then we will all be safe.”
“Shells…I couldn’t get him while I was up there…I…”
“I know, honey. I know. It will be alright.” And though Shelly was hurting and frightened, Miles could see the conviction in her eyes. He could see the sincere truth that she expressed in her words. “We can talk about all of that later.”
“There is a lot to talk about actually….” Buddy noted as he gingerly touched the tip of his nose. “What has happened with us all for the past three weeks, what we know, what the next move is, Brian…” And more, Miles thought as he looked at Amber, so much more. She looked so very different…how had he known it was her? Was he that in tune with her? His body warmed at the thought because yes…he was. He knew her, no matter how much she changed.
Miles watched for a moment as Amber shifted in her seat before Michael spoke up. “We will discuss every bit of this this evening. Right now, you all just need to relax.” The sound of footsteps echoing down the stairs caught their ears and Amber immediately jumped to her feet, anticipating who would enter the living room. Miles anticipated this as well, wanting to gauge reactions and tamp down his own nervous, angry energy that was rebounding through his body. It continued to edge closer to a breakdown and he was uncertain why. Was it relief? Was it overwhelming shock, or even exhaustion? Was it her distance? His own distance? George entered the room then, stopping in the doorway of the living room as they occupants of said room looked on with interest. His eyes looked around, eyebrows furrowed in confusion. He wouldn’t talk, Miles knew he wouldn’t, and against his clean skin the deep scratches and swollen bruises around his neck screamed at them. He reflexively cleared his throat.
“George?” Amber asked and he jerked his eyes to her, his green orbs trailing down her body, taking in her new clothes, hair, and eyes. Suddenly, his eyes widened and a smile formed on his face. Amber grinned back and stepped over Buddy’s feet to the edge of the couch.
“Amber?” he asked, his voice rough and broken and Amber nodded. Quickly he rushed forward and swept her up into a hug, pulling her from her feet. She held him back tightly, burrowing her face into his shoulder. Miles watched this with interest and doubt, knowing that it was only seconds before she acknowledged the bruises.
“I knew I could count on you George!” she exclaimed against him before he slowly released her. He stepped back, smiling at her but he didn’t speak. He couldn’t because it hurt to form words. She looked at him, studying him, her smile slowly fading and Miles crossed his arms. The monster was right beneath skin, scratching and clawing to be set free. It was ugly and he was trying his best to control the rage. “Oh…oh my God…what happened?” she asked, turning and shooting accusing looks at Michael and Riley. “Who did this to him?” she asked and everyone shifted uncomfortably. George tried to comfort her but she only pulled away from him. Miles kept his gaze levelled to her but she didn’t bother to look his way. That was beginning to grate at him. He was almost tempted to force her to look in his direction. No one seemed to want to tell her what happened, though Riley was just as confused as she was. Everyone except for Buddy, that is.
“Well, Sweetness, after you took that fall they took Cassie, George, and Miles for strength training before we left to come here. Someone snapped and took a chain to George…along with a few other poor fellows. Cassie’s fine though. She was in on it.” He cut his eyes to
Miles and Miles tensed, grinding his teeth together and he waited. He waited for Amber to look at him and ask him why. He waited for her to turn those now brown eyes to his own and speak to him. However, after a long moment, he realized she was studying the ground at her feet. He fought the urge to step forward, to confront her before she spoke to George.
She sighed. “I’m glad you are alright.” She told him, meeting his eyes and wrapping him in a warm embrace, one that he gladly returned. Miles felt the hurt overwhelm him and quickly he turned to leave the room, to get cleaned up. He ignored the looks that everyone gave him and kept walking. He knew she was safe, and he would be quick, but he just couldn’t stay in the room after that. She was ignoring him, she was almost…afraid of him…and he didn’t understand what had happened. He hated it. He couldn’t stand the feeling that came with it. Maybe he would feel better with some new clothes and a clean-shaven face. It was probably the best decision considering the front door then opened and he heard squeals of ‘Mom!’ and ‘Amber! You’re alright!’. He would have simply been in the way.
It was much later when he had come across them all again. After an exhilarating shower and a quick shave and haircut he had changed clothes and felt refreshed. And so, unable to be around them all, including Amber and Michael, he had wondered off. He had been unnoticed, and he was both grateful and hurt by that. He had pushed those thoughts away however, and trudged forward, looking at whatever caught his interest. He saw all the animals, the gardens…he saw the gym area, the small water tower and the weapons hold. He even stopped by to see the crosses. He had taken up both his and Shelly’s, but even then he had spent a long while staring at the last one, the last name on the last cross. Damien. Why had she created a cross for him, he wondered, and another surge of anger hit him. What in the hell had he missed? Last he had heard the sorry son of a bitch had killed Kyle and Jackson; he was Adrian’s son, for crying out loud. He was getting anxious for whatever events Michael and Riley had planned for that evening, anxious and ready to discuss everything and for all of them to get on the same page as one another. He needed that. And so finally, with much hesitation, he turned and made his way back to the houses, oblivious to how late he had stayed out.