by Maya Wood
When she entered the cabin the previous night, her five suitcases had awaited her in a tidy stack alongside the bed. Her mind still frayed from the task of letting go of her former life, she had busied herself with unpacking a week’s worth of clothing and toiletries, and she was relieved at their effect in making her quarters feel more intimate. The ship hummed pleasantly, and now Alexis simpered with pleasure as she looked around. In all her fantasies of travel, she had imagined this very morning, waking in her cabin and exploring the titanic vessel which was to carry her to worlds unknown.
Sitting at the edge of the bed, Alexis smoothed her camel-colored button-up dress, its soft feminine lines coquettishly revealing her statuesque figure. The rich earth color darkened her auburn locks into a soft halo of smoky ringlets pinned to the nape of her neck. In the mirror bolted just above the dress cabinet, Alexis fastened a matching Basque beret slightly off center with pearl-tipped pins, and applied a thin layer of burgundy gloss over her lips. Slipping her hands into a pair of trim, chocolate-colored gloves, Alexis grabbed her leather satchel and flung open the door of her cabin, casting an excited glance back at her new home.
Alexis practically skipped through the corridor, bounding up the stairs and sucked in a breath of wonder when she emerged through the arched doorway. Men and women strolled leisurely about the open deck, lacy parasols catching in the breeze. They draped themselves along the cushioned lounge chairs, ordering iced teas and cocktails with spiced rums. Children dared themselves to the rail and tossed pennies overboard, their heads bobbing through cable to watch the copper discs disappear into the swelling surf. What a wonderfully bizarre community, she thought.
Though her second class ticket did not grant her admission to the ship’s more luxurious features, Alexis spent the afternoon climbing mysterious stairwells, exploring dark passageways, and scribbling furiously in her journal as she paused in the abundant nooks the vast ship offered. As the sun sank low into the orange haze of dusk, Alexis watched with quiet admiration from a cushioned bench against the rail.
Just as her mind began to ebb toward Boston, a young woman dressed in a comely plaid tunic coat sat down a few feet away. Her features were small and feminine but for her nose, which arched high and narrow at her brow. Wheat-colored pin curls framed her heart-shaped face, and her small lips seemed to settle naturally into a child-like grin which she flashed at Alexis. Rummaging through her purse, she retrieved a flat silver cigarette case. She brought the cigarette to her mouth, and it dangled from her lips elegantly, as though she had rehearsed the art of smoking many hours before a mirror.
Alexis gave a subdued smile and returned her gaze to the sun, now electric as it met the horizon. The woman stood as if to leave, but she hesitated and turned to face Alexis. She bent forward. “Hello,” she said, her voice a playful alto, and offered her hand.
“Hi,” Alexis replied uncertainly.
“My name is Tabitha. Tabitha Lockley. You?”
“Alexis Scott.”
Tabitha smiled again. “I saw you this morning at the café. I was curious about you. Are you traveling alone?”
Alexis bowed her head. “Yes, I am. Are you?” she asked, her brows rising hopefully.
Tabitha laughed. “No, I’m with my family. We’re on holiday together. We usually travel somewhere in Europe, but we decided on something a little more adventurous. So it’s Australia this year.” Tabitha took a deep drag from her cigarette. “Why are you traveling alone? If you don’t mind my asking.”
Alexis shook her head, “No, I don’t. I…um…I’m actually on my way to New Guinea. I work in Boston at the Society of Natural History. I’ll be doing some research while I’m there.”
Tabitha reeled back and let her jaw drop theatrically. “Well, that’s the one answer I hadn’t even imagined.” She laughed again, and Alexis relaxed with its good-natured timbre. “So you’re doing all this by yourself? Aren’t you scared?”
Her new friend settled again on the bench, this time much closer to Alexis. She couldn’t be more than twenty-five. Her face emitted the eternal youth of curiosity and innocence, an effect negated by the willowy wisps of gray smoke spouting steadily from the tip of her cigarette. She flicked it in the air and a crust of ash vanished from sight.
Alexis swallowed nervously, both happy and wary to make a friend. “I’m traveling there alone, but once I get to the island I’ll be meeting another researcher, and of course we’ll have a guide to get around.” She wondered if her voice betrayed the nonchalance of her words, but Tabitha looked enraptured. “To be honest, I’m scared to death.” Alexis braced herself as she pronounced the sentiment which had taunted her, as though to admit it would make her fear come alive. Instead she felt the rush of relief, and Tabitha squeezed her arm and squealed with disbelief.
“God, I can’t imagine it. You’re so brave.” Tabitha stubbed out her cigarette against the rubber sole of her heeled sandal. “What about your family? Mine would never allow it.” She shook her head, the golden curls bouncing tightly.
When the conversation reached a peaceful lull, Alexis saw that the sky had opened into an infinite black chasm, the stars so ablaze and voluminous that they seemed to pull in close to the sea. The women sat in silence, and Alexis felt a wave of gratitude sweep over her. She felt completely at ease with Tabitha, as though they were childhood friends. Unlike many of the acquaintances she’d made over the years, she sensed no need to defend herself, or her interests. Tabitha listened to her stories with genuine and disarming interest, and she divulged the details of her own life with a heart free of fear. Alexis learned that her family, while supportive, still obeyed the rigid rules of the Boston elite. That she was being pushed to marry for economic convenience.
“But I won’t do it,” Tabitha said matter-of-factly. “They’re simply mad if they believe I would marry someone just to secure their financial interests.” Tabitha relaxed against the rail and let out a whooping sigh. She giggled and let her hand fall on her new friend’s arm. She jerked with the spasm of a budding idea and squeezed Alexis.
“Why don’t you have dinner with me and my family? God, that would be entertainment. We’ll be in the stuffy first-class restaurant, but the food is unbeatable.”
Alexis wriggled her nose at the thought. She had had her fill of Boston elite, but she held her tongue. “Actually, I’m totally exhausted and there’s nothing I want more than to settle in my cabin. Maybe I can find you tomorrow?”
Tabitha let out a knowing laugh. “Yeah, I don’t blame you.” She snapped her pocketbook shut and stood, her skirt falling neatly around her calves. Looking toward the sky, she sighed wistfully. “There’s nothing like this. Sometimes I think I love the voyage more than the destination.” Shrugging her shoulders, she turned back to Alexis. “Anyway, we’ll be in the botanical café tomorrow playing cards. Why don’t we meet there? Say, three o’clock?”
Alexis nodded and rose from her spot. “That sounds great. I’ll see you there.” The two women embraced like old friends, and Alexis was sorry to see her go.
In her cabin, Alexis relaxed in the reading chair, her legs drawn under her. She had slipped into a long, white cotton gown, and her open robe cascaded over the curves of her body like the gossamer whorls of a waterfall. On the table sat a wide-rimmed cocktail glass she’d requested from a passing ship attendant, now wet with her father’s brandy. She inhaled its sharp odor and she toasted Lawrence as she brought the glass to her lips. Clasping the worn spine of her favorite novel, Alexis smiled contentedly as she read into the late hours by the flame of the candle burning low in its glinting stem.
***
Tabitha’s face burst with warmth when she saw Alexis approach. “Hello, hello!” she exclaimed eagerly, and Alexis loved her instantly for her unrestrained exuberance. The two pressed their rosy cheeks, and squeezed each other’s hands. “I’ve told my family all about you and they’re dying to meet the bold Alexis Scott.”
Alexis blushed violently, arrested in her tr
acks. “Um…” she stammered.
Tabitha laughed and swatted away Alexis’ worry with a dismissive hand. “Oh, don’t worry! They won’t bite.”
They passed through the glass dome, a maze of exotic greens stretching upward in worship of the sun. Beautifully worked wrought iron chairs and tables were tucked in coves of flowered vines, which dangled lazily from the beams of an arching trellis. Tabitha took Alexis’ hand and led her further into the mystical labyrinth. A ring of perfectly dressed and coifed Bostonians sat around a wide, circular table, their hands clutching crisp playing cards. Alexis could feel her heels grinding counter to Tabitha’s pull. She had the familiar sensation of walking into a lion’s den.
“Everyone,” Tabitha announced loudly, “this is the friend I told you about. Alexis, this is my family.”
The Lockleys lowered their cards, and the solemn lines of their faces opened into pleasant smiles and chirps of welcome. The mother and father eyed her curiously, and the family rose to offer Alexis their hands. As they settled back into their chairs, a stern-faced man stood slowly and extended his open palm to Alexis.
“William,” he said, his voice irritatingly aloof.
“It’s nice to meet you,” Alexis replied mechanically. She took his hand, and his fingers closed around hers firmly.
A young cousin set off in search of another chair, and Alexis shifted anxiously as a chorus of innocent but inquisitive questions assailed her. Wasn’t she concerned for her safety? What about her family? How was she qualified for such a trip in the first place? Each answer seemed only to spur another round of questions, their engrossed faces never hinting at the disapproval with which these kinds of interviews had frequently met. She might have felt unnerved by their harmless bewilderment, but she was distracted by the unwavering shadow on William’s face as he watched her across the din of the friendly interrogation.
His tepid voice was soft, but the group silenced as he spoke. “You don’t think it’s a little excessive?”
Alexis jumped slightly in her seat at the undisguised accusation. Immediately put off, she didn’t bother with more than a cock of her eyebrow.
“Well,” he said, his voice touched with condescension. “You don’t see many women crossing the ocean alone to explore dangerous lands. Perhaps it’s whimsical, is all.” He frowned conclusively, as though the material point had been made, and there was nothing left to say. Alexis rolled her eyes unconsciously and William twitched at her response.
The secluded enclave fell quiet, and Alexis suddenly regretted her decision to meet Tabitha. Now that her experience with the Talbots was behind her by hundreds of miles, she had grown impatient of these stale conversations and predictable confrontations.
She considered politely excusing herself when Tabitha’s commanding voice piped up. “Oh, be quiet, William. Who asked you anyway?”
William narrowed his eyes at his sister, the exchange evidence that the two had likely butted heads the whole of their lives. Alexis heard a stifled giggle, and finally Tabitha’s father slapped the table comically, seizing the group’s attention. “That does it. I think what we need now is a round of cocktails.”
As the family toasted, their bodies warming with spirits, Tabitha pulled Alexis from her seat. Whispering sideways at her hoarsely, she said, “I’m so sorry about my brother. I can’t believe he said that.” She snorted and rolled her eyes. “He likes to keep the women of my family in check, too. It’s just his stuffy nature.”
Alexis arched an eyebrow. “It’s alright. I’m well acquainted with that kind of thinking,” she grumbled, trying her best to keep her tone light.
Tabitha grinned sheepishly, her cheeks an apologetic rouge. “Don’t pay him any attention. Most of us don’t. We tolerate him as best we can,” Tabitha looked back over her shoulder at her brother and raised her voice, “because he’s family and we love him.”
Alexis squeezed her new friend’s hand, and savored the luck of finding such an outspoken, rambunctious spirit. “You want to get tipsy with me later on?” Alexis proposed.
Tabitha stood on her tiptoes and squealed. “God, yes. I have feeling we’ve got lots to talk about.”
***
On the tenth day of the Oceanic’s voyage, Alexis stood at the bow of the mammoth ship. Above her, the night sky seemed to swallow the earth itself, the sound of the hull slicing against the black current the only evidence that they were connected to the shadowed round of the planet. She closed her eyes, and she let the gushing wind fill her lungs. Tomorrow, she would bid farewell to yet another milestone in her life as the ship pulled into Sydney. She let her mind sift through the days that pulled her further from Boston, each one stretching like gum into an epic fold of time which seemed to dwarf the decades before.
She smiled fondly as she thought of Tabitha, how casually she had strolled into her life that first evening on the deck, and how significant she had become. They were inseparable, and as though they both understood that their friendship was somehow fated, they crammed their days together with the most intimate of stories and revelations, leaving nothing unsaid.
“You’re kidding me!” Tabitha had shrieked, collapsing backward on the bed in Alexis’ cabin. It was late and the two had been swigging from the bottle of brandy. Tabitha’s eyes crinkled, tears streaming over her cheeks, and she clutched her stomach, trying to catch her breath. Alexis had just recounted the humiliation of her entrance at the Talbot’s Autumn party, the way her gleaming dress had almost split up the middle, and the glacial reception of her future mother-in-law.
“So you mean to tell me you’re going to bind yourself to that horrendous woman for the rest of your life?” Tabitha had meant it as a joke, still carried away on a fit of giggles. But Alexis swallowed hard over resurging doubt.
“Well,” she started, “I guess I’m hoping we’ll manage to keep our distance.” The mood shifted, and Alexis suddenly felt a dark sense of foreboding.
“Oh, I’m sorry, Alexis. I didn’t mean to-”
“No, no, it’s fine,” Alexis had reassured her new friend. “Do you think I’m being naïve? About Philip?”
Tabitha’s mouth curled at an awkward angle. They were entering a dangerous realm of question and answer. “You know what you’re getting into better than I do,” she tried, hoping the casual evasion would satisfy Alexis.
Alexis’ brows folded into a skeptical crease. “…But…” she prompted.
Tabitha smiled weakly. “But, as an unwilling member of those kinds of circles, I think it will be difficult.” She cleared her throat. She did not want to influence her friend, but those sapphire eyes blinked with such earnestness that she could not keep quiet. “It will be difficult, Alexis. From what you’ve told me about Philip, he is head over heels for you. But I know the kind of life he has, and the kind of family he has. Gee, even I know who the Talbots are. Everyone has a role, and everyone fulfills it. If you marry him, you might not have to fight him, but you will have to fight every person associated with him. And imagine what you’ll ask of him to ignore and defy family and friends, all of whom mean so much to him.”
Alexis groaned. The giddy effects of the brandy had turned on her. Her mind churned with unwanted questions. Questions and doubts she thought she’d left behind her. “What would you do?” she heard herself ask. It wasn’t like her to depend on someone else for answers.
Tabitha lowered her eyes. “That’s a tough one, Alexis. Personally, I couldn’t do it. It’s hard enough to survive among my own family. It’s taken a lot of time to convince them that I’m never going to be a little doll. And I still have my battles. So forget about marrying into another family with similar expectations. No way,” she breathed. She reached her hand to Alexis’ shoulder and gave it a squeeze. “But that’s me. I can’t possibly tell you what to do. And who knows,” she added with optimism, “maybe Philip will be inspired, and he will whisk you away to some remote, exotic place, and you two will lead a quiet, peaceful life. Far, far away from in-laws.”
“Thanks, Tab,” Alexis had said when the pair could hardly keep their eyes open and she showed her to the door. It had been one of Alexis’ best nights.
For the whole of her life, Alexis had guarded herself against the bitter emptiness of friendship, cushioning the void with her father’s company, with Philip’s appearances of tolerance. Tabitha resided firmly in her heart now, possessing her stories as personal secrets. She knew their goodbye would be tearful, but she was swept up in the overwhelming peace of heart that she would see her friend again.
Chapter Ten
Alexis sat on a plain wooden bench, bolted sturdily to the cafeteria on the smaller, more authentically rustic sea vessel that would carry her to the remote island of New Guinea. She poked at the bland strips of beef and vegetables on her tin plate and reviewed with longing the moments she’d spent aboard The Oceanic. Her stomach turned and she looked disparagingly at the lumps of unappetizing food before her.
She’d understood immediately the distinct change in tone of her adventure the moment she beheld the Allegiant. It was slightly larger than the ferries she’d seen crossing Boston Harbor, but weathered and dingy, unconvincing to the eye of its seaworthiness. The paint along the hull chipped and peeled, wood and iron warped by stories unknown to Alexis. Reluctantly she had presented her boarding ticket to the ship attendant, a lanky young man with smooth coffee skin and worn clothing too big in the waist. He’d bit down on a thin strip of wood between his white teeth, smiled widely and gestured toward the gangplank. Alexis had returned a nervous smile, and cast an uncertain glance back at her conspicuously abundant luggage.
“I will bring these to your cabin,” he had said with assurance. She had grinned at the sweet melody his voice made of those commonplace words.
Alexis looked around the cafeteria at her fellow passengers. Here she remarked a notable difference as well. On the Oceanic she was ordinary at best. Nothing of her clothing or the places she frequented set her apart from or above the other passengers. Now she writhed uneasily in her well-fitted day dress and expensive leather heels. The extra care of pinning a cap stylishly atop her hair seemed superfluous, ostentatious even. The ship’s travelers were mostly men in modest, worn clothing. The women wore light cotton fabrics dyed in deep, impressive hues. Around her, voices peaked and plunged with sounds unfamiliar to her ears, peppered now and again with English.