by Ed Gorman
She was a secretary from Kansas City (well, all right, an executive secretary) and guns just weren't a part of her life.
Not at all…
46
8:20 P.M.
"She's your daughter, isn't she?"
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"What did they do to make her want to kill them?"
"Who?"
"You know who. Ken Norris and Kevin Anderson."
"I thought we were friends, Tobin."
"We are friends, Susan. I'm trying to stop anybody else from being killed." He paused. "She's your daughter, isn't she, Joanna Howard?"
"No."
"You're lying."
"As I said, I don't know what you're talking about."
"You thought she died in the trailer with your husband but she didn't. I talked to Everett Sanderson's brother-she crawled away from the blaze and the police found her in the morning."
"I'd like a cigarette."
"I don't have any."
"Why don't you ask the steward outside the door?"
"In a minute."
Susan sighed and let her head drop. Even in a loose gray workshirt and wrinkled jeans-and utterly without makeup-she was still beautiful. Fading as she approached her mid-forties but beautiful nonetheless.
They were in the cabin where Susan was being held. Sometimes people passed by in the corridor. Some of them whistled and some of them laughed. It seemed to
Tobin that at this moment no one on the entire planet had any right to whistle let alone laugh.
He stood three feet away from her. There was no doubt at all that he was her inquisitor. He wished it did not have to be this way but there was no choice. Not any longer.
He said, "You did a good job when you ran away from the trailer, Susan. Just enough plastic surgery that nobody back home would recognize you. Not right off, anyway. But you didn't count on the Sanderson brothers and you didn't count on your own daughter."
Susan looked up finally. Her face was ruined in the way a stroke victim's face is sometimes ruined. A look carved into the face forever. She said, "She's crazy, you know." She was starting to choke and cry.
"They helped you, didn't they-Ken Norris and Kevin Anderson-they helped you burn down the trailer, didn't they?"
She nodded, continued crying.
"They came to a small town to make a movie and you were dazzled-only your young husband was a very jealous man and wouldn't let you go when they made you promises about Hollywood-and so the only way out you could see was to burn down the trailer. Along with your husband and your daughter-and start all over again as Susan Richards."
He got up and she came at him and he could see now she was just as crazy as she'd accused her daughter of being.
He slapped her across the mouth once, with something like expertise, and pushed her on the bed.
He stood over her and said, "That's how you got your start in Hollywood, wasn't it? You were sleeping with them and they helped you burn down the trailer and so you were all locked in together. They had to help you succeed. Did they know your daughter was in the trailer that night?"
"No," she said softly. "I told them she and her father were out of town. They just thought they were helping me get a new start-burning down the trailer and sneaking out in the middle of the night. I was… crazy. All I could think of was getting rid of my daughter and husband and-" She rolled over on her stomach and put her head down and the sobs were so hard that the entire bed bounced.
He wanted to go over and slide his arm around her-he could not imagine how you could hold in your mind the fact that you had tried to kill your own child-and offer her whatever mixture of hatred and pity he felt for her.
But instead he said, "Jere Farris was a part of this, too, wasn't he? The other night Joanna tried to tell me she'd slipped a love letter under his door-but it was a Xerox of her baby picture, the one she left with Norris and Anderson before she killed them. She killed Sanderson and Iris Graves because they'd figured out who she was too. She didn't have any choice."
There was a knock.
Tobin kept his eyes on her as he went to get the door. When he opened it, the room was filled with the scent of the ocean. The steward stood there. "The captain asked me to check with you after ten minutes. To see if everything was all right." The steward carried a formidable walkie-talkie.
"Tell him everything's fine."
The steward nodded and closed the door.
When Tobin turned back, she was gone. He went over and sat in the easy chair and listened to her pee in the toilet.
When she came out she said, "Can you imagine her life, Tobin? Can you imagine how I've destroyed it? Her own mother trying to kill her."
"I know." Suddenly he was tired of her self-pity. It was her daughter who should be pitied.
"I want you to tell her that I don't expect her to forgive me. But that I do ask her to understand that I was very young and that her father was very cruel."
"She was your daughter."
"Just tell her that, Tobin. Just tell her that."
He got up and put his hands in his pockets and began to pace.
He turned abruptly for the door.
"Where are you going, Tobin?" she said.
"Where the hell else?" he said. "To find your daughter."
47
8:51 P.M.
"Where's Jere?"
"Went for a walk," Alicia Farris said at her cabin door. "What the hell do you want with him?”
She was drunk.
***
He ran the length of the deck and found no sight of Jere Farris. He found a phone in a lounge and called the captain. He explained as concisely as he could who Joanna Howard really was. "Find her before she kills Farris," he said.
***
He was back on the deck, headed for Cindy's cabin when he sensed rather than saw someone step from the shadows behind him. He'd been aware of a presence ever since leaving the lounge a few minutes ago.
She put the gun into his ribs, jamming it hard, and said, "I want you to help me get in to see my mother."
"I can't do that. She's under guard."
"I overheard your conversation with the captain. All you need to do is give the word."
"They're looking for you."
"I just want you to get me inside her room."
He saw her face finally, there in the moonlight. For the first time he saw a resemblance between the two women. Surgery had altered Susan Richards's face. What they shared was their insanity.
She prodded him with the gun.
The steward glanced up. "You going in again?"
"Yes."
He started to say something as he stood there in front of the door, officious in his whites, his walkie-talkie impressive, but Joanna spoiled all that by catching him a hard clean blow with the butt of her gun on the side of his head.
He went down in a heap.
She grabbed the doorknob and pushed the door inward. Then she said, "Get him in here so nobody sees him."
Tobin dragged the man inside.
"Tie him up and gag him," Joanna said, once the door was locked behind them.
Then she turned and looked at the woman on the bed. Tobin saw for the first time pieces of blood and flesh on Joanna's long-sleeved white blouse. Jere Farris's blood and flesh. She had gotten them all now. All except the one who mattered most.
Susan Richards was barely conscious. Next to her on the bed was a prescription bottle of sleeping pills. This time her suicide attempt had been for real. He said, panicked, "She's dying."
"From what?"
Tobin was still trying to adjust to the contrast between the shy, self-spoken Joanna and this harsh, singular young woman. "Sleeping pills and alcohol."
In two steps Joanna was at her mother's bedside. She leaned over and pulled the semiconscious woman up by the collar of her blouse.
"You killed my father, you bitch!" Joanna cried, and then began shaking her in a frenzy. "You killed my fathe
r, do you understand?"
She pushed her back down on the bed.
"I want a drink, Tobin."
There was the fifth of scotch from which Susan Richards had been drinking. Tobin went over and got them both drinks.
She took hers and said, "Sit in that chair over there where I can see you."
"What are you going to do?"
"We, Tobin, you and I. We're going to sit here and watch her die."
"I can't let you do it, Joanna."
She waved the gun at him. "You can stop me?"
He sighed and went over and sat in the armchair facing hers.
On the bed Susan Richards moaned and babbled. She sounded as if she were coming out of deep anesthesia.
People passed by talking. There were parties going on all over the boat. Tobin and Joanna sat in their chairs and watched a woman die.
"For what it's worth, Ken Norris and the others didn't know you were in that trailer that night," Tobin said.
"Don't talk."
He watched her then. She just stared at the woman on the bed. Her face, pretty if plain, was without expression. The.45 in her lap looked ludicrous until you noticed what he assumed was Jere Farris's blood.
Susan Richards began convulsing a few minutes later.
Tobin started to get up. Joanna leveled the gun at him, waved him back down.
They sat and watched some more.
At one point Susan wet her pants. Then she began crying. She wasn't conscious at all now.
Joanna continued to stare at. her mother. Just stare. "Go check her pulse," she said finally. "Why don't you let me call the doctor?" Tobin said. "Maybe there's still time."
"Check her pulse."
Tobin leaned over Susan. Her skin was cold and sweaty. He checked for a pulse in her wrist and then in her neck and then in her ankle. It was very faint.
He turned back to Joanna. He said, "She's dead."
"You're lying."
"Check for yourself."
"She just made a sound a minute ago."
"Apparently it was her last sound."
"You're like all the others. A liar."
He stood aside from the bed, inviting her to check for herself.
"Goddammit," Joanna said as she got up. "I wanted there to be pain. I wanted her to suffer. All she did was go to sleep."
Keeping the gun pointed directly at Tobin's chest, she went over to her mother, waggled out a hand, and felt for her mother's wrist.
Tobin kicked her very hard in the hip. It knocked her backwards onto the bed.
He grabbed the gun and then stumbled to the phone.
He shouted for somebody to send the doctor and the captain to the cabin where Susan Richards was being kept.
By the time he had turned back to the bed, the sobbing had begun, and what he saw then startled him.
Joanna Howard, very much like a child, clung to the unconscious form of her mother; clung as if to let go would be to fall down a dark chasm.
"How could you do that to me? How could you do that to me?" she said over and over as she kissed Susan's face and stroked her hair as if her mother were a doll. "How could you do that to me? I'm your own daughter. Your own daughter." The rage was gone; there was just the sadness left, and the bafflement. As she said, she was Susan's own daughter.
Tobin went over and checked Susan's pulse again. He didn't tell Joanna-and Joanna didn't seem to realize-her mother, though comatose, was still alive. Several times on the cruise, Susan had asked Tobin to talk. Now he wished he'd spent the time.
He untied the steward. The man had cigarettes in his jacket pocket. Tobin took one and lit it and then went out on the deck. Joanna was still sobbing, still talking to the dying woman. He didn't want to hear anymore.
The captain and the doctor ran past.
Tobin stood at the railing and looked out at the black water and the sky. He wondered about the nature of god and the nature of man. Even from here he could hear Joanna crying.
He smoked his cigarette and in a time, without quite wondering why, he started crying too. He was thinking of that trailer and the yellow furious heat it must have cast against the black night, and the burned infant girl crawling away from it.
He stood at the railing, alone, for a long time.
48
SATURDAY: 10:58 A.M.
They slept together and then Cindy went back to her own cabin to shower and change.
***
When he found Cindy, she was sitting at a table with a pink sun umbrella over her. He saw again the bruise on the side of her face from where Joanna had struck her. There was a glass of orange juice and an omelet and two pieces of toast in front of her. She paid no attention to them. She kept pulling up the falling left strap of her sundress and writing heatedly (Balzac must have composed this way, Tobin thought) on baby blue stationery.
He ate half her toast and all of her eggs and drank most of her orange juice before she looked up.
"Oh, gosh, Tobin."
"Hi."
"I was just writing to Aberdeen. About all the murders and everything and how I got slugged and how Susan almost died and Joanna is under arrest. I was really scared."
"Ah."
"Aberdeen just won't believe it. She really won't."
"I don't blame her."
"But she'll be thrilled."
"I'm sure." He had every reason to smile. He phoned Snoop with the whole story. They had promised a bonus.
"She'll tell everybody in the insurance office and by the time I get back there, there'll even be something about it in the company newsletter."
"Should I be happy for you?"
"Nobody's ever put me in the company newsletter before."
"Then I'm happy for you."
"You don't sound happy."
He reached out and touched her sweet Kansas City hand. "It's not a morning to be happy," he said.
He thought about it all: Joanna and Susan and how they'd looked when the Coast Guard had taken them away; Cassie revealing that she'd been forced to pay Ken a special "talent fee"-another form of blackmail-to stay on "Celebrity Circle"; Sanderson and Iris Graves learning that the winner of a nowhere talent show in Indiana was actually Susan; Ken turning crazed and extorting money from his own accomplices in setting the trailer fire-and them being so afraid of losing their careers that they'd gone along.
She put down her ballpoint pen. "Look at the sun and the blue water, Tobin. Then you'll be happy."
He laughed. "You promise?"
"Sure," she said, laughing too. "I promise."
When a steward came by, Tobin ordered a rather large glass of orange juice, this one with some vodka in it, and then he sat back beneath the pink sun umbrella while Cindy went back to writing Aberdeen, and he looked at the yellow sun and the blue water and he tried very hard to be happy.
He tried very hard.