Holidays Bite: A Limited Edition Collection of Holiday Vampire Tales

by Laura Greenwood

  On the anniversary of Queen Elizabeth’s death, he found himself in the south of France near a field of lavender, battling a raging melancholy that would not subside. For one hundred years, he’d looked for her, and for one hundred years, he’d been left wanting. He wasn’t lonely so much as restless. Something was missing from his life and although he knew exactly what it was, he was at a loss of how to achieve it.

  He missed his queen and her lady lover. They alone knew what he was, and they alone understood the suffering being undead brought. No amount of wine or fucking or expensive trinkets could fill the void of having others like him in his life. Someone who knew him. Understood him. Loved him.

  His boots scuffed along the dirt road, and he hunched into his coat against the midday sun. It was just as his queen had said—indeed, he hadn’t combusted in daylight. A chuckle rumbled from his chest, and he lifted his face to the warmth. He didn’t know what could kill him and preferred to never find out.

  The sound of laughter pulled his attention to a copse of trees, and he stepped over a tuft of low shrubbery to forge a new path. As he stepped from the trees, he spied two lovely young women dancing, their hands clasped, heads thrown back, as they skipped in a circle. Gorgeous hair the color of an autumn leaf reached to one woman’s arse. The other’s hair, as black as onyx, fanned behind them both. Their locks cascaded like fire and deepest night against their pale, opalescent skin.

  His breath caught and the women stopped their dancing to stare at him. Their youthful faces broke into wide smiles as they looked first at him, and then each other.

  “Come,” said the beauty with onyx hair. “Come and dance with us. We’ve been waiting for you.”

  Around her neck, she wore a scarlet velvet choker with exquisite obsidian drops dangling against her lovely neck.

  “Darling Roxy, at last you’re here.” The redhead beckoned him forward.

  Contentment settled in his heart. He’d finally found his Penelope and Elizabeth.

  Enjoyed this story? Be sure to leave a review! Rox will be back for more shenanigans in Curses and Claws later this year. Be sure to sign up for Tameri’s newsletter to hear about it first!

  About the Author

  Tameri Etherton is a USA Today Bestselling and award-winning author who grew up inventing fictional worlds where the impossible was possible. It’s been said she leaves a trail of glitter in her wake as she creates new adventures for her kickass heroines, and the rogues who steal their hearts. She lives an enchanted life traveling the world with her very own prince charming and their mischievous dragon, Lady Dazzleton.

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  BOOKS BY TAMERI ETHERTON

  Song of the Swords*

  The Prince of Dragons

  The Stones of Resurrection

  The Temple of Sacrifice

  The Ruins of Betrayal

  The Veils of Deception

  * * *

  The Fatal Fae*

  Fatal Illusion

  Fatal Assassin

  Fatal Legacy

  * * *

  Court of Stars*

  Sunset in Shadow

  * * *

  Chronicles of Eidyn*

  Child of Fire

  Dragon Mage

  * * *

  Short Stories

  UnBroken

  * * *

  *Books that are part of the Aetherverse: The fantastical realms of Tameri Etherton. Characters and storylines intersect within the books with magical consequences.

  Books By Tameri Etherton

  Holiday Hell

  A Paranormal Detectives Series Novella

  Lily Luchesi

  About Holiday Hell

  It’s the most wonderful time of the year … unless you’re under attack by a winter witch.

  While planning for her annual holiday party, Vampire Empress Angelica discovers a sinister plot to create eternal winter. She, her husband Danny, and her friend Sean must stop the culprit before the Solstice.

  Can she pull off a Christmas miracle, or will it be a silent night?

  Chapter 1

  “I’m gonna ask you one more time … why were we called in for this again?” Angelica Mancini, nee Cross, looked at the bluesuits standing before her. She crossed her arms, not because of the weather, but because she was upset and needed to do something to keep her hands still.

  Her husband and partner, Danny Mancini, glanced over at her warily. He knew her movements better than she did.

  “I have to agree. This looks like … well, I’m not sure. Hunting gone wrong?”

  The bluesuits shook their heads. “Look closer. This was ritualistic. But we only caught the big picture because of the copter helping us light the way. They took a photo…” The shorter of the two beat cops passed Angelica a cell phone with a picture loaded on the screen.

  “Holy shit,” she said. “The local kids don’t usually do this stuff after Halloween.” She passed the phone to Danny. He was a lifelong Catholic, and she knew he would be horribly offended once he saw the image.

  Five reindeer, killed with a blade, arranged in a way so they were connected by trails of their blood to make a pentagram. It was precise, sure, but not exactly a good way of summoning anything more than dead buck or doe.

  “Lovely,” he muttered, handing the cop his phone back. “But looks like kids playing a prank. Why call us in?”

  They both raised their hands as if to say, “Don’t blame us.”

  “We were told if anything super strange happened, call the number to get you guys,” the taller cop said. “This seemed a little above super strange.”

  Angelica huffed. “All right. You guys can leave. We’ll take over, find the little shits who did this, and scare them straight. Teach them to ruin date night again. Forward the picture to that same number and get lost.”

  Both cops, though they appeared older than her, stood at attention.

  “Yes, ma’am,” the shorter one said before they both scurried away.

  Danny looked at her and said, “Do you enjoy their fear?”

  She pursed her lips to hide a smirk. “What do you think? Come on, let’s get this over with. We can always rewatch White Zombie when we get home.” She lifted a booted foot and trudged through the snow. It was December, and December in Chicago was not for the fainthearted or the cold blooded.

  Good thing vampire blood was dead. The cold didn’t matter to Angelica, though she was sure Danny felt a chill, even with the heavy parka and hat.

  She bent over the dead deer and examined its wounds. They were fresh. The bodies were warm and the blood smelled delightful. If Danny wasn’t there, she would have taken a warming drink, but she didn’t like to drink animal blood in front of him. Typically, she drank no blood but his.

  “Cut throats on all five?” Danny said, checking another deer.

  “Looks like it.” Angelica checked a second one. “I’m guessing a hunting knife, but I just realized … how could a bunch of idiot kids stealthily slit the throats of five typically flighty reindeer, not let any blood flow, drag their bodies here, and make perfect straight lines to form the pentagram?”

  “Maybe they weren’t kids. Maybe this is some sort of sect,” Danny commented. “Trying to summ
on Satan or some other evil deity.”

  She nodded. “Seems plausible. Call cleanup. Have them check the carcasses for any foreign substances and scan the wound to determine what model blade was used. We can head back and look for any demonic activity or sects who have a Cervidae god or goddess they might want to summon. Or Santa Claus.”

  Pausing, she brushed a strand of long black hair from her face. “I cannot believe I just had to say that out loud.”

  “Isn’t Satan a goat god? And Pan?” Danny suggested.

  “Bovid, not cervid,” Angelica replied quickly. “They’re in the cow family, basically. Deer, elk, and moose are different.”

  Danny shook his head. “Fucking insane. Next they’ll try to use Dark magic on one and create Rudolph.”

  She gave him a playful smile. “You could be mistaken for him with that red nose of yours. Come on, let’s get you indoors and with some sort of hot drink.” As she slipped past him, she playfully tweaked the tip of his nose.

  He followed behind her and caught her with an arm around her waist. His warmth was palpable even through the thick layers they both wore. The feeling made Angelica double down on wanting to hurry and get to work: winter was the perfect vacation time for a vampire, because she was awake longer to spend more time with her mortal husband.

  Plus, it was almost Christmas, and she still had to plan the annual PID holiday party at Crowley’s Pub.

  The PID was located in an infamous building in Downtown Chicago. In the summer, the sight of it at night was magnificent enough. During the holiday season, when lights and wreaths were strung up on every building and light pole, the sight was almost ethereal. As though the Fae world and modern human monoliths collided.

  Angelica lived in Chicago since 1888, and she still thought it was the most beautiful city she ever saw.

  They took the elevator up to the hundredth floor and she could feel the superficial warmth returning to her husband’s extremities, though his nose and cheeks were still adorably red.

  Once they settled in her office, Angelica called down to reception. “Please bring up a carafe of coffee and a warmed mug of B positive.” She hung up without further communication. She didn’t need to bother with pleasantries. Everyone knew what she was like and if someone expected her to act differently, that someone had best be Christ Himself.

  “Bet the FBI never thought they’d have a file on murdered reindeer around Christmas,” Danny said. He gave a light chuckle.

  “The FBI gave up monitoring our files years ago,” Angelica replied. “When they came to me and practically begged to incorporate my organization, their active involvement stopped after renaming us the ‘Paranormal Investigative Division’ and helping with public funding.” She looked up at him, grinning. “We’re too weird for them.”

  “No shit. I’m part of this place and sometimes it’s too weird for me!”

  There was a knock at the door and Angelica called for them to come in. She expected a gofer, a junior agent. Instead, a short, well-built man with sparkling dark eyes entered, carrying the tray with coffee and blood.

  “Sean!” she said, jumping up to hug him after he set the tray down. “Since when are you a delivery boy?”

  “I was, back in the seventeenth century,” he admitted, hugging her back. “Heard your call, figured I’d come say hi.”

  “Hi,” Danny butt in pointedly. “Can we continue with our business now?”

  Angelica rolled her eyes as Sean moved away from her and sized Danny up. She and Sean once had a thing for a couple of decades, before Danny was in the picture.

  “What business? You applying to lead Santa’s sleigh with that schnoz?”

  Angelica burst into laughter and felt awful for it, but Danny looked so offended, crossing his arms and huffing.

  “Yeah, and they can amplify the light off your glittering skull,” he snapped.

  Still laughing, Angelica held up her hands. “Peace, boys. We really do have work. Sean, if I need you, will you be around?”

  “You won’t,” Danny said sotto voce.

  “Anytime anywhere, darlin’.” He gave her a mock salute and turned to leave, closing her door softly behind him.

  Danny glared at the shut door.

  “You trying to cast a malocchio through the wood? Need I remind you that’s a forbidden curse?” Angelica teased, leaning down over the chair he sat in, her hands gripping the leather-padded arms. Her hair curtained them off from the rest of the world. “I wish you’d stop this needless jealousy.”

  Most of the time, their rivalry amused her, especially since both men knew that her heart belonged to Danny and had for over a century now.

  “He rubs me the wrong way,” Danny muttered.

  “Yeah, well, you rub me the right way, so that’s what matters.” She kissed the tip of his cold nose. “Come on, let’s get to work before Christmas actually hits. I have a funny feeling this isn’t going to be as easy as I first thought.”

  Chapter 2

  The best thing about his wife funding most of the PID, to Danny, was that they had their own forensics, tech, and morgue. No need to wait on the city, like he did when he was a detective with the Chicago Police Department. Cases got solved in a fraction of the time here, and it was all thanks to his wife’s inheritance that was about a thousand years old.

  So it came as no surprise to him when a forensics tech knocked on Angelica’s office door with a manila file in hand.

  “Director? We received results back from toxicology as well. You were right.” The woman opened the file on the center of the desk, the only spot not covered with some sort of object.

  Angelica was not known for neatness.

  “I usually am,” she replied. “But why was I right this time?”

  Danny gave her a warm smile across the desk, though she was too intent on the new information to see it.

  “No kid could possibly get the jump on five reindeer and cut their throats without unleashing a torrent of blood as they tried to move them. The deer were drugged.” The tech pointed to a line on the toxicology report. “They were injected with a hefty dose of tiletamine and xylazine.”

  “That’s the stuff they use to knock bears out, right?” Danny asked.

  The tech nodded.

  “So they shot them with tranqs and then dragged them,” Angelica said. “Makes much more sense. Did you get what kinda knife was used?”

  The tech nodded. “It’s all in here. I just wanted to explain about the drugs. I know you understand the rest.” She stood up straight and said, “Good night, Director and Mister Mancini.”

  After she left Angelica took the file and flipped to the front. “Oooh, 124 buck hunting knife. Those have amazingly smooth blades for being modern and mortal made.”

  “But not easy to track. You can buy them at Walmart,” Danny commented.

  She nodded. “Yeah, true. I mean … maybe this was some elaborate prank. But to move five reindeer… How many grown men would that take, you think?”

  Danny took out his phone and Googled the weight of a reindeer. “The females keep their antlers in winter, right? I’d say two guys could easily do it. One if they were particularly fit. So maybe you were right and this was a bunch of bullshit.”

  She paused and put her cheek in her hand, leaning on her elbow. “Did we see any drag marks? I mean, those deer were warm. They couldn’t have been there long, so why were there no traces of them being dragged?”

  “Maybe they were carried? Like I said, they were small enough. And the snow was falling fast enough to cover footprints,” he suggested.

  “Yeah…” She pursed her lips, obviously unconvinced.

  “Hey, Angie, are you having some sort of gut feeling on this?”

  She shook her head, leaning back in her ornate desk chair. “No. I just hate to think our night was ruined by two idiot beat cops too stupid to pass the detective’s exam.”

  “Shouldn’t you be happy that you don’t have some dyslexic trying to summon Santa?” D
anny gave a wry grin and she tossed a balled up piece of paper at him as she laughed. He tossed the paper in the wastebasket and held a hand out to her. “Come on. We still have some good time left before sunrise. Our night doesn’t have to be totally ruined. Let some lesser agent find the assholes and punish them.”

  After a moment of reluctance — she hated leaving a case unfinished — she took his hand and stood up. “You’re right. We deserve some time off. Fuck’s sake, we never even got a honeymoon while we chased a crazy rogue vampire around. They can at least give us one Saturday without bothering us.”

  The little girl was maybe seven, maybe younger. Her lank blonde hair fell out of its pigtails underneath a fluffy pink beanie with a pompom on top. Her coat was a few shades darker pink, and her boots were fluffy with a unicorn theme.

  She was standing in the clearing where the deer were before the ghouls disposed of them. The blood was long gone, but in its place was a circle of ivy leaves that were weaved together intricately with a knot ot holly every so often.

  “Where am I?” she called. “Where’s my daddy?”

  “Don’t ya want to meet Santa Claus, little girl?” a voice asked. The person who owned the voice would not show themselves, and it was warped, as if the speaker was coming through water.

  Her tears stopped a bit and she gave a tentative smile. “Yes.”