by Gina Wilkins
Trying to distract herself again from that painful subject, she thought suddenly of Mrs. Parsons, sitting alone next door in the dark and the cold. Wearing the afghan like a shawl, she made her way toward her door by the beam of her flashlight, feeling the need to make sure the older woman was all right.
The hallway was deserted on their wing, though she could hear voices coming from the apartments on the other side of the elevator. She didn’t think Hannah was home. Probably staying with one of her study friends. She didn’t know whether Teague was in or not, but his door opened just as she reached Mrs. Parsons’s apartment.
“Are you okay?” he asked, recognizing her in the dim glow of her flashlight.
“Yes,” she answered briefly. “Are you?”
“Yeah. Have you checked with Mrs. Parsons yet?”
“No. I was trying to decide whether to knock. If she’s already asleep, I wouldn’t want to wake her. I’m afraid she would fall over something in the darkness.”
He stepped out of his apartment into the hallway, little more than a deeper shadow in the darkness that was barely affected by Dani’s little flashlight. “Good point. The power could be out for a while, though, since the crews have all they can handle tonight with the power out all over town. We need to make sure Mrs. P. is going to stay warm enough for the night.”
“Maybe we should call her. I know she keeps a telephone by her bed.”
“Good idea.”
But before either of them could make a move, Mrs. Parsons’s door opened. “Oh, thank goodness,” she said, her voice quavering. “I thought I heard you two out here.”
Mrs. Parsons, too, held a flashlight, and Dani noted immediately that it wasn’t quite steady. “Are you okay?” she asked again.
“I’m just so glad to see you both. Well, I can’t really see you, but I’m glad to know you’re here.”
Dani heard Teague take a quick step forward, responding to the uncharacteristic anxiety in the older woman’s voice. “What’s wrong? Are you hurt?”
“No.” Mrs. Parsons gave a sheepish laugh. “Just a bit anxious. I don’t like the dark. I usually keep a night-light burning. But it’s so black in here now, without even a glow from the security lights outside.”
Dani spoke sympathetically, her tone reassuring. “It’s okay, Mrs. Parsons. I’ll stay with you until the lights come back on, if you like.”
“Could you both come in? Just for a little while?” The tiniest quaver shook her voice as she asked. “I’d just feel better having us all together for a bit.”
Dani looked uncertainly at Teague, whose expression was hidden in shadows. But she saw him nod. “Let me grab a few things and I’ll be right there,” he said.
“Oh, thank you, dear.” Mrs. Parsons reached out to clutch Dani’s arm, as if to make sure she didn’t slip away in the meantime. “We’ll wait for you inside.”
As they entered the apartment, Dani ran the beam of her flashlight around the living room, satisfying herself that everything was in place. She was glad that Mrs. Parsons had kept a flashlight nearby so she hadn’t tripped over anything in the darkness. Turning her beam in the vicinity of her neighbor while trying not to blind her with the light, she realized that the older woman wore a thick, long robe, probably over a warm nightgown. “Had you already gone to bed?”
“I had just climbed into bed. I was tired, but I wanted to check the weather one last time before I turned in. I’m usually fast asleep by now.”
“Maybe you should try going back to bed. If you pile on the covers, you should stay warm enough until morning.”
“Yeah, go on to bed, Mrs. P. Dani and I will hang out in here for a while, until we’re sure everything’s okay.” Teague entered the open door as he spoke, visible only as a dark shape behind his flashlight.
“I am very tired.” Again, Mrs. Parsons’s voice was a bit unsteady. “I usually turn in an hour earlier than this.”
“Let me help you get back into bed,” Dani volunteered, moving toward her. “Where do you keep your extra blankets?”
“In the bedroom closet.” Mrs. Parsons clutched Dani’s arm as they made their way carefully to the other room. She seemed to Dani to be smaller than usual, a little more fragile. “I really appreciate this. I’m sorry to be so much trouble.”
“You’re no trouble at all,” Dani assured her. “I’d just be sitting in the dark in my apartment rather than yours.”
“You and Teague certainly don’t have to sit up with me all night. But if you could stay for just a while, until I’m asleep…maybe an hour or so?”
“I’ll certainly stay. My flashlight is bright enough to let me read by it, so I can entertain myself. Teague will be right across the hall, if we need him. There’s no reason for him to sit with me.” She intended to send him home as soon as she got Mrs. Parsons settled, and she doubted that he would argue with her. She was sure he was no more inclined to spend an hour in the darkness with her than she was with him after their last encounter. She couldn’t imagine a more awkward situation.
“I’m being silly, I know,” Mrs. Parsons said. “It just feels better knowing there are other people in the house during times like this.”
Dani had never seen her independent and seemingly self-sufficient neighbor this anxious. She supposed it was a good thing, after all, that Mrs. Parsons would be moving closer to her son soon. Perhaps age was finally starting to take its toll on the sweet lady.
Leaving Mrs. Parsons snuggled under a pile of warm blankets, Dani carefully moved back into the living room, bumping her shin only once during the path. Mrs. Parsons certainly did like large, heavy furniture, she thought ruefully, limping the rest of the way.
“You okay?” Teague stood next to a living room table, where he had just lit an emergency candle in a heavy jar. A second candle was already burning on the coffee table, casting enough light in the room that Dani could make her way to the couch without the use of her flashlight.
“Yeah. I just hit my leg on a chest in the hallway. I have a feeling there will be a bruise, but no lasting damage.”
He was pulling something out of a canvas bag as she spoke. “You want a cup of coffee? It’s decaf, so it won’t keep you awake all night, but it’ll help keep you warm.”
“You brought coffee?”
He shrugged. “I’d just made a pot when the power went out. I poured it into a thermos, so it’s still hot. I grabbed a couple of mugs out of Mrs. P.’s kitchen. I didn’t think she’d mind.”
“I’m sure she wouldn’t.” Dani accepted a steaming mug from him and took a sip. The warm beverage tasted good and felt even better as it seeped into her. He hadn’t had to ask if she took it black. He knew she did, just as she knew he took his the same way.
Her chest tightening with the memories of the cozy cups of coffee they had enjoyed together, she lowered the mug and spoke a bit gruffly. “There’s no need for you to sit here with me, you know. I’m just going to stay until I’m sure she’s sleeping comfortably, and then I’ll go back to my own place.”
But Teague had already settled into a chair, a mug cradled between his hands. “I’ll stay until I finish my coffee. Hate to leave you in the dark by yourself with nothing to do.”
“Thanks to your candles, I’m not completely in the dark,” she reminded him. “And if I get too bored, I have my MP3 player in my sweater pocket.”
“I know my company can’t compete with your obsession with the Foo Fighters, but I’ll stay for a few minutes anyway.”
Another subtle reminder that he had gotten to know her quite well during the past few months. How had that happened, anyway? She’d tried so hard to keep it all light and casual, and yet somehow he had crept into her life, her thoughts. Her heart, she reluctantly added with a ripple of fear.
After a few moments of silence, Teague spoke again. “Look, Dani, about what I said last week—”
“Forget it,” she said quickly, dreading a postmortem of that quarrel. “I was out of line asking where you’d be
en. Let’s just drop it, okay?”
“You weren’t out of line. Just sending mixed signals. Either we have the sort of relationship where we check in with each other or we don’t. You can’t have it both ways, expecting me to report in to you while I’m not allowed to even express my concerns for your safety when you come in alone late at night.”
She winced, because what he’d described was so painfully accurate. That was exactly the way she had treated him. “I’m sorry. I had no right to jump you like that when you came home. I was worried when you disappeared for so long, and I overreacted.”
“And I was dead tired and grouchy, and I snarled at you. I should have thanked you, instead, for being concerned. And apologized for alarming you. Had I known you’d be that worried, I would have found a way to get a message to you somehow.”
“How on earth could you not have known I’d be worried?” she asked incredulously. “Teague, you just disappeared for days with no warning. And so soon after you’d been beaten up so badly you could hardly stand. I was sure you were dead in some alley somewhere or lying in some ICU unit with a gunshot wound or something terrible like that. I could hardly sleep the whole time because of the horrible scenarios I kept coming up with.”
He took a moment to digest that, and she worried that she had revealed too much with her frazzled ramblings. “You see,” he said finally, “I have quite a few friends. A bunch of them were at the party we were supposed to attend on New Year’s Eve. I didn’t call them that night to tell them I had to work. I figured they’d know. I didn’t call any of them this time, either. I can’t take the time whenever I get called away on a big case to call all my friends and let them know I may be gone for a few days. It happens fairly often, which is why I keep a packed bag in my car at all times.”
She was glad then for the shadows that she hoped hid her reddened cheeks from him. He was making her feel very foolish about her outburst that night he’d returned home—as if she hadn’t already regretted that scene a hundred times or more.
“Now, it would be different,” he continued, “if I had someone special in my life. Someone who was more than just one of my many friends and acquaintances. Someone who had every right to worry about me and to be reassured, when possible, that everything was okay.”
Her fingers tightened around the mug. Was he speaking metaphorically or…? “Well, sure, I guess, um…”
Her incoherent stammering barely seemed to register with him as he spoke on. “The thing is, it’s hard being involved with someone in my job, Dani. We’ve discussed it before. I’ve explained that I’ve generally avoided serious relationships because I wasn’t sure I would ever find anyone who could deal with what I do. It would take someone pretty damned special. Someone with a satisfying life and strong interests of her own. Someone who wouldn’t expect me to give up the job I love, but would be there to welcome me when I get home. Someone I would want to support just as enthusiastically. Say, by attending her concerts and recitals whenever I’m available to do so.”
Okay, now that was making it personal. She gulped. “What are you saying, Teague?” she asked bluntly.
“I guess what I’m saying is that I’ve been miserable this past week. I miss you, Dani. This wasn’t what I planned. I tried to fight it, tried to convince myself I could be with you without falling for you—but it didn’t work. I’m hooked. You can reel me in or let me go, but I just needed you to know I’m tugging on the line.”
The whole fishing analogy threw her for a minute, but she quickly reminded herself that Teague wasn’t the type to make flowery declarations. What he was saying was clear enough. “Friends with benefits” wasn’t what he wanted from her anymore.
There, in the candlelit dimness of her neighbor’s fussy living room, she sat with her hands clenched around the warm mug, stunned by Teague’s unexpected words, trying to decide how to respond. He gave her plenty of time, making no further sound and moving only to lift his own mug to his lips, as if his speech had left his mouth dry.
“Oh, for pity’s sake, Dani, tell him how you feel,” Mrs. Parsons called out impatiently from the other room. “Don’t just leave him sitting there in suspense.”
Dani was startled into a gasp, having forgotten all about the older woman, and totally unaware that their conversation had been audible to her. Mrs. Parsons must have been shamelessly eavesdropping the whole time. Teague looked just as chagrined. Even in the flickering glow of the candles, Dani could tell that his cheeks had darkened a little in response to the knowledge that his awkward declaration had been overheard.
Because the thought of tough, self-assured Agent Sexy blushing made her melt a little inside, she found the courage to say quietly, “I’m reeling.”
The word had several meanings, all of which applied at that moment. But Teague seemed to understand immediately what she was telling him. He set his mug on the nearest table and rose to his feet. And though her heart was beating so hard she could hardly breathe, Dani did the same.
She wasn’t sure which one of them moved first, but suddenly they were locked together, Teague’s mouth hard on hers. It felt as if months had passed since he had last kissed her, and she kissed him back as if she’d been starving for his touch. Which, of course, she had been, as much as she had tried to deny it even to herself.
After giving them a few moments of privacy, Mrs. Parsons called out again. “You two can go now. I’d like to get some sleep. Be sure to lock the door when you leave.”
The smug satisfaction in her voice made both Dani and Teague frown.
“You little conniver,” Teague said, looking toward that darkened bedroom. “You weren’t afraid at all, were you?”
“Good night, dear. Don’t forget to blow out those candles when you leave. Fire hazard, you know.”
Muttering beneath his breath in a mixture of amusement and dismay, Teague blew out the candles, plunging the room into darkness. Gripping Dani’s arm, he led her to the door by the beam of his flashlight, leaving the coffee and mugs behind. She gave a fleeting thought to them, but figured she would collect them tomorrow. They had more important things to concentrate on for now, she thought with a nervous swallow.
Teague took her to her apartment. She’d left the door ajar in her haste to check on her neighbor, but he didn’t even bother to fuss at her for her lax security this time. He merely escorted her inside and booted the door closed behind them.
There weren’t any candles burning now, and his flashlight was only in the way. She had left hers at Mrs. Parsons’s, she remembered belatedly, but even that didn’t seem important now. Teague set the flashlight on a table, barely illuminating their faces when he gripped her forearms and gazed down at her in the shadows.
“You’re willing to give this a real try?” he asked, as if to make sure he had understood her correctly. “No pulling back this time?”
“I’m still nervous about it,” she admitted. “I mean, my last relationship was such a monumental disaster….”
“I keep telling you, Dani, I’m nothing like that guy Kurt. But that’s not what you’re really worried about, is it?” he asked suddenly, as though the realization had just hit him. “You’re more worried that you’re the same person you were with him.”
She nodded numbly.
“That,” he told her, tugging her into his arms, “is just crazy. I don’t know exactly what went on between the two of you back then, but the Dani Madison I know would never let any man put her down or control her. And if any guy ever raised a hand to her now, she’d leave him bleeding on the floor.”
“I want to believe that’s true,” she murmured, “but I can’t deny that I’ve become pretty well obsessed with you. I think about you all the time, Teague. I swore I’d never be that way again with another man. Maybe I haven’t changed as much as I want to believe.”
Her candor seemed to disarm him for a moment, leaving him speechless and her feeling extremely vulnerable about whatever he might say next. When he spoke, his voice wasn�
�t entirely steady, which made her heart clench. “Don’t you see, Dani? I feel the same way about you. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since the first time I saw you. Even when I’m concentrating completely on my job, you’re always there, hovering at the back of my mind until I have a free minute to think about you again.”
He cupped her face in his hand, his palm warm against her cold cheek. “It’s not something I’ve had much experience with myself, but from what I’ve been told, a little obsession is all just a part of falling in love.”
Her pulse rate jumped. “You—you’re in love with me?”
“I’m pretty sure I am,” he muttered. “Because I know I’ve never felt like this about anyone else before. Never thought it was worth taking this kind of risk with anyone else before.”
“I’ve never felt like this before, either,” she whispered. “What I felt for Kurt—that wasn’t love. I never even knew him, really. This is so very different.”
“You see?” he asked against her lips. “Everything’s different now. You. Me. Us.”
She wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her mouth harder against his, demanding the kiss he’d been teasing her with. He willingly complied, kissing her until they were both trembling and panting, their bodies warm in the rapidly cooling apartment.
“It isn’t going to be easy,” he warned when he caught enough breath to speak.
“I don’t need it to be easy,” she replied unsteadily, pulling his head back down again. “I just need it to be honest. Real. Equal.”
“All of that and more,” he vowed, kissing her again.
Using his familiarity with her apartment layout, he began to nudge her toward her bedroom door. Her heart beat more quickly in anticipation of the pleasures to come. They had just stepped into the bedroom when the electricity came back on, flooding the room with sudden light.