“Christmas or not,” Rosie said, “if you need the doctor, you call him now. Does she have a fever? Is she drinking?”
“She was a little warm last night, but she seems normal now. She has a stuffy nose and a cough. She has a hard time drinking her bottle with her nose so stuffed up, but she is getting plenty to drink, even if it takes a long time. I don’t think we need to call Doc out in an ice storm.”
“Okay, well, her cold explains why you are moving around here like a robot in one of those old space alien movies. If she didn’t get any shuteye last night, I’m sure you didn’t either. Why don’t you go lay down now?” Rosie said.
I wanted to jump at her suggestion, but I was worried about leaving her awake and unattended. I didn’t have time to talk myself into it before Baby Girl started crying out for me. When I returned to the table with Baby Girl in my arms, Rosie had another plan to offer. “Why don’t I go back to bed, and you can put Georgia in there with me? I can keep an eye on her while you take a nap.”
Another tempting offer, but it only took a few seconds of contemplating this one for me to picture Baby Girl rolling off the bed and Rosie tumbling after her. “I’ll take a nap later, when she dozes off again. Let’s go open the gifts. I can’t wait for you to see what I made for you.”
Hours later, I was knee-deep in wrapping paper, and Rosie had replaced the old afghan with the new lap quilt I had made for her. I cleared some space for Baby Girl’s new quilt and laid her down with one of her new toys. I gathered the paper and bows, moved everything back under the tree, and dropped onto the couch. Baby Girl was happy rolling back and forth on her quilt and chewing on the toy keys. I decided to leave her be, and take a moment to breathe. I don’t know if it was the fact that I had gone two days with nothing more than a couple of cat naps or if it was all the twinkling colored lights, but I looked at the tree and burst into tears. “What’s wrong?” Rosie asked.
I wanted to stop the flood of salty tears washing down my face, but I couldn’t. “You come on over here,” Rosie ordered.
I did as I was told and sat on the floor by Rosie’s feet. I was sobbing so hard, I couldn’t catch my breath. I was missing Mama, and my sisters and brothers, something fierce right now. Worse than that, I was filled with shame over all the lies I’d been telling since arriving in Watson’s Grove. Every gift I’d opened today, every act of kindness, came from someone I had lied to, someone who deserved more respect than I had paid them. Rosie reached over and swept the hair from my face. “You’re missing your family today, aren’t you? I know they must be missing you, too. You go out there in the kitchen and you call them up right now. I don’t need to know who they are, or why you left. You don’t need to explain anything, and I don’t need to know anything. You go ahead now.”
Rosie was wrong. Rosie, who gave me a job, was wrong. Rosie, who gave us a home, a family, and a community, was wrong. She did need to know, and I did need to tell her. I rested my head on her knees and tried to stop my sobbing. Rosie stroked my hair, and for a few minutes the sound of my heaving breaths filled the room. Then the words started pouring out of my mouth like the tears from my eyes. I told her about Mama, Daddy, and my brothers and sisters. I told her about the barn and the boxcar. Then I told her about Baby Girl. When I was done, Rosie whispered, “I’m sorry, Becky. I shouldn’t have made you hold this all inside for so long. It’s going to be all right. Everything is going to be all right. I promise.”
I sat there praying her words would come true. I felt something touch my leg, and my head jerked up. It was Baby Girl. It took a minute to set in my head. She had never moved anywhere on her own before. But here she was. She had rolled onto her belly and crept the couple of feet over to me. She grabbed onto my leg with one hand and pitched forward. Before I could pick her up, she had picked herself up and was balancing on her arms and belly. She gave us a big smile, and Rosie and I both said, “Look, she’s crawling on all fours, and she has her first tooth!” It was barely there, but sure enough, a little white pearl was peeking above her gums.
Rosie bent over and hugged my shoulders. “This surely is a day of milestones for our family.”
CHAPTER 30
The next few days were filled with sorting and packing. Neither Rosie nor I spoke of the secrets I had shared. Baby Girl’s new freedom of movement meant she had to reside on my hip as I readied our things for the move. She was getting big, and my hip and back would ache some by the end of the day, but it was the safest place for her to be. I kept waiting for Rosie to experience a change of heart; I thought seeing her life get packed into old grocery cartons would make her want to stay in her own home. The change never came. Rosie seemed resigned to the move. I collapsed onto my bed each night, exhausted from the day’s labor, but sleep usually escaped me. Instead, I lay in my bed, stared at the ceiling, and replayed my Christmas confession to Rosie.
When moving day arrived, John pulled up in front of the house. A big moving truck pulled up to the curb right behind him. Four men got out of the truck and rolled up its back door. John led them into the house, and they wasted no time before lugging the boxes out to the truck. “Well, ladies, are you ready to go?” John asked. “Your chariot awaits you.”
Rosie frowned. “I don’t know if I can get up into your truck, John.”
“I already thought of that. I have the car today,” he said, grinning.
“I should have known you would have thought of everything, John,” Rosie said, patting his arm. “Let’s go, Becky.”
“Why don’t I stay behind until they get everything in the truck?” I offered. “We don’t want them to miss anything.”
Rosie shook her head. “These men know their job, I’m sure. I don’t want you hanging about, getting sad about moving. It’s best we keep moving forward, and not look back.”
I nodded and dressed Baby Girl in her winter jacket, hat, and mittens. I grabbed her diaper bag and flung it over my free shoulder. I followed John and Rosie out the door, all the while rubbing my cheek against Baby Girl’s forehead. Feeling the softness of her skin against mine gave me the courage to follow Rosie’s advice, and not look back.
Rosie and I sat in the back seat of the car with Georgia buckled into her car seat between us. As John drove past the Second Hand Rose, my eyes welled up with tears and I had to turn away to keep Rosie from knowing. Rosie started humming “Sweet Georgia Brown” and helped Baby Girl clap her hands to the beat. I turned back to watch and saw Baby Girl’s whole self smiling. By the time John pulled into Lily’s long driveway, Rosie was belting out the chorus and swinging to the beat in her seat, and Baby Girl was laughing out loud. Despite my concerns, I found myself laughing and singing along.
When the car came to a stop, I was surprised to see Lily waiting at the door for us. I had never seen her open her own door before. Something else was different, too. It took me a few steps for it to click into my brain. Lily wasn’t carrying her cane. As we passed through the doorway, Lily smiled and said, “Welcome home! Mrs. Harper will organize the moving men when they get here. Why don’t we go into the parlor and rest a bit before lunch?”
I knew that was another one of those questions not looking for an answer, so I followed Rosie and Lily into the parlor. Watching Lily sweep across the room with Rosie under her wing reminded me of my favorite picture in the hymnbook at church. In the picture, a dove with both wings opened wide is sweeping down from the heavens. I was a different story though. My big toe was still giving me trouble, and with Baby Girl on one hip and her diaper bag on the other I looked more like a pack mule making my way through a canyon. There was nothing peaceful or graceful in the way I was moving. There was nothing making me look like I belonged in that house.
The heavy drapes in the parlor had been pushed open to allow the sunshine to pour into the room. Lily and Rosie set to talking right away. I couldn’t concentrate on their conversation, so I just kept nodding my head, every so often pausing to hope I hadn’t agreed to anything I shouldn’t have. The ex
citement of the car ride had tuckered Baby Girl out, so she passed the time napping in my arms. When she woke up, I knew it was time for me to rejoin the world, too. “Excuse me, Lily, but I need to be getting Georgia her lunch. May I use your kitchen to fix her something?” I asked.
Lily shook her head. “I want you to start thinking of this place as home, Becky. It isn’t my kitchen, it’s our kitchen, and you don’t need permission to roam around your own home.” She looked at her watch and added, “Actually, I think all of our lunches should be ready now.”
The words had no sooner passed her lips than Mrs. Harper came into the parlor to announce as much. When we settled in the dining room, I was surprised to find my work done for me. Not only was there lunch for the three of us, but the cook had prepared a special meal for Baby Girl. I must have been half asleep before, because I hadn’t heard a peep of noise from the movers, but Baby Girl’s highchair was set up in the dining room. I looked down at the flowered rug under my feet and started worrying about Baby Girl’s dining etiquette. We would wear out our welcome quickly if she spit her sweet potatoes all over that rug. When I went around the table, I was relieved to see a cloth spread out under her chair. Mrs. Harper must have raised some babies of her own.
I fed Baby Girl before turning to my own plate. I had barely gotten a bite in when Lily decided to turn the subject of conversation to me. “I looked into the art classes at the college John attends,” she began. “You can take up to two courses this coming semester and then apply to be a full-time student for the summer sessions. You can take the GED next week, and your scores should be in quickly enough for you to be allowed to take the college classes. I know it is short notice, but I talked to someone and received permission for your late registration, and I’m certain you are ready for the test. We can do some review work to boost your confidence. You can drive the car John picked you up in today to get to school. I know it is a little stuffy-looking for a young girl, but it will do until we get you something more suitable.”
Rosie interrupted. “We haven’t even settled into our rooms yet. Talk about tests and college courses can wait.”
“Well,” Lily said, “my point is it can’t wait. Becky needs to get her paperwork in now, so she can take classes at the end of January.”
Rosie was never one to lose a battle of wills. “We will talk about this later, after we have settled in,” she said.
The conversation had killed my appetite, so I offered to clean up from lunch. Lily seemed surprised by my suggestion and explained it was someone else’s job to clean up after meals. “Why don’t I show you to your rooms,” Lily said. “You can get settled in today, and tomorrow we can sit down and get Becky’s paperwork finished.”
Rosie’s room was on the first floor, tucked into a corner of the house I had never seen before. It was about four times the size of her room at home, and had a sitting area with a television. There were big closets on one wall, and a door leading to her very own bathroom. Back home, four of my brothers shared a room half the size of this one. I offered to do her unpacking, but Mrs. Harper had beaten me to it. Rosie’s clothes were hanging in the closets and her photos, knickknacks, and medicine bottles were lined up on her dressers and tables. Rosie settled into a chair in front of the television and sent us on our way.
I followed Lily back into the hallway. “Your room is upstairs,” she explained. As I followed her up the staircase, two things came to mind. First, I didn’t like the idea of being so far from Rosie. What if I couldn’t hear her calling for help in the night? Second, I wondered if Mrs. Harper was the snooping kind. If she had gone through all of Rosie’s things, had she gone through mine too? I ran my hand through Baby Girl’s diaper bag and felt my notebook buried in the middle of her things. I was grateful I’d thought to do that before we left Rosie’s house. Lily stopped in front of an open door. “Here you are,” she said with a sweep of her arm.
The room was even bigger than Rosie’s room downstairs. At one end was a big bed dressed in a yellow and white striped comforter. Nightstands with tall crystal lamps stood guard at both sides of the bed. I could see a huge tub through an open door near the corner of the room. At the other end of the room stood a sofa, a chair, some small tables, and a television. A small nook contained a desk and a pair of bookcases. It was beautiful, but what was missing was more important to me than all of those pretty things. “Where is Georgia’s crib?” I asked.
Lily looked surprised by my question. “Her crib is in her room,” she answered. “It’s right this way.”
I tightened my grip on Baby Girl as I followed Lily. A door just beyond the nook connected my room to a nursery. It was decorated in pink and white, with dolls and stuffed animals lined up on shelves. A rocking chair was placed next to her crib. The room looked like a picture in a magazine, but all I could think about was how far the crib was from my bed. I think I could have run from the Second Hand Rose to the Super Suds faster than I could make it from my bed to hers.
I didn’t want to seem ungrateful, so I kept my concerns to myself and decided to find my own solution to this problem. One glance at Lily and I knew it was the right decision. Her eyes clouded with tears as she looked around the room. I had been so worried about myself that I hadn’t stopped to think about how difficult it was for Lily to have a different baby moving into the room that must have been intended for her own. “Thank you for everything,” I said. “I’m going to change Georgia’s diaper and put her down for her afternoon nap.”
“You must be exhausted from all of the packing,” Lily said. “And your foot is still bothering you. I’ll change Georgia and rock her to sleep, so you can get some rest.”
“I can take care of her myself,” I said.
We stood staring into each other’s faces in silence for a minute or so. “I know you can,” Lily answered. “I’ll go check on Rosie.”
I watched Lily leave the room. Her shoulders drooped and her stride lacked the lightness and energy I had seen earlier in the day. I changed Baby Girl’s diaper and laid her in her crib. I only needed to rub her back for a few minutes before she fell asleep. I stood by the crib watching her back rise and fall for a few minutes before tiptoeing off to my room. I explored the drawers and closets before collapsing onto the sofa. I propped my foot up on a pillow and turned on the television. I rested for a bit, turning the television’s volume lower and lower until finally I turned off the set. I was worried I wouldn’t hear Baby Girl if she cried. I kept telling myself the sofa wasn’t much further from the crib than the front room of Rosie’s house was from our bedroom. Knowing I was being silly for worrying didn’t make the worrying go away, so I moved to the rocking chair in Baby Girl’s room.
That night at dinner, Lily was as quiet as she had been the first time I’d met her. I wondered what was wrong, but held my questions inside. When the table was cleared, Lily suggested we go to the parlor. “Rosie and I had a long talk this afternoon,” she said. “I want to hear your story straight from your mouth.” I could hear the anger in her voice.
I stared at Rosie. Had she told all of my secrets to Lily? My answer was in Rosie’s eyes.
I stood up and lifted Baby Girl onto my hip. “We’ll clear out of here in the morning,” I said.
“You’ll do no such thing,” Rosie said. “I only told her because I knew she could help. You two aren’t going anywhere without me.”
I walked out of the room before some angry words slipped out of me.
I spent that night sleeping on the floor beside Baby Girl’s crib. I didn’t think Lily would mind my leaving, but I wasn’t sure about how she would feel about me taking Baby Girl with me.
CHAPTER 31
I woke up the next morning and discovered the little piece of floor I had slept on had become a stage. I had an audience of two—Mrs. Harper and Lily, who was standing with her hands on her hips. I was taken aback by the sight and let out a little yelp. The noise woke Baby Girl. I stumbled to my feet, so I could be the first one to her. Lily
cleared her throat. “Mrs. Harper came up to see if you would be having breakfast downstairs or in your room. When she saw your bed hadn’t been slept in, she came and got me.”
“I was worried Georgia might be afraid sleeping on her own. She’s never been this far from me before,” I said. This may have not been the whole truth, but it was a part of it. The look on Lily’s face though told me she heard what I wasn’t saying just as loud and clear as the words I spoke. I turned away from her and focused my attention on Mrs. Harper. There was a real softness, a kindness in her eyes.
“I brought a bottle for the baby,” Mrs. Harper said. “It might not be warm enough anymore, though.”
I reached out and took the bottle. “Thank you,” I said. “I’ll feed it to her right after I change her diaper. We’ll come downstairs after we’re dressed. I don’t want you waiting on us. Save your energy for Rosie.”
I placed the bottle on the table next to the rocking chair and walked around the ladies to the changing table. When I started changing Baby Girl’s diaper, my audience must have decided the show was over, because they left.
After the changing and feeding came the bathing and dressing. When I had Baby Girl looking and smelling as fresh as a daisy, I decided it was time to get to work on me. I settled her into her little seat and carried it into the bathroom with me. The bathroom was big enough to hold a class in, so it was easy enough to find a safe place for her seat. I picked a spot where she couldn’t touch or grab anything, gave her one of her little toys to play with, and stepped into the shower.
By the time I was showered and dressed, Baby Girl was in need of another diaper changing. I tended to her needs and then carried her downstairs for breakfast. I heard voices in the dining room, so I peeked in there on my way to the kitchen. Rosie and Lily were sipping tea and discussing the weather. I slipped away unnoticed and went to the kitchen. The woman wiping a counter looked startled at first, but a smile quickly spread across her face. She dropped her rag and wiped her hands on her apron before petting Baby Girl’s head. She said a few words in a language I didn’t know. My lack of understanding must have shown on my face, because she quickly switched to single word communications. “Hungry?” she asked, and without waiting for an answer, “Go!” She pointed me back in the direction I had come from.
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