by Susan Conley
Madison might be only fifteen, but she, certainly, had more sense than I did.
“I don’t fall for guys who have no interest in me,” she had told me some weeks earlier. “What would be the point?”
“There is no point,” I’d told her. “But you don’t choose whom you love.”
“I do,” Madison said, so stubbornly certain that I gave up trying to explain.
But I knew by experience that reason had nothing to do with love. I had fallen for Bécquer against all common sense and, hard as I tried, had not been able to forget him. And against my better judgment, I wanted very much to see him again.
Besides, the meeting was to be the following Saturday, which was the weekend Madison would be grounded. And any excuse to leave the house was welcome, because nobody knows better than a grounded teenager how to make life miserable for everybody else.
Chapter Fourteen: The Contract
There were two cars already in the parking space in front of Bécquer’s house when I arrived. A yellow Jeep and a green Honda Civic.
Almost two weeks had passed since the Halloween party, which meant Federico would be gone by now and Matt, I knew, kept his car in the garage. My understanding was that only Richard would be there today. I remembered Richard had mentioned he didn’t own a car for he didn’t need one in Manhattan and had taken the train to Princeton to come to the party. Maybe he had rented one today. If he had, a Jeep seemed an unusual choice for a rental. Was his the Honda Civic then?
As for the other, it had to be Rachel’s, I thought with a pang of jealousy that had no reason to be there. Bécquer had asked me to be his blood giver and I had refused. That he had chosen somebody else was inevitable, that I hurt because he had was illogical.
My hurt also validated my decision. Even if I had agreed to give him my blood, he might have taken the girl as his lover, which would have been even more painful for me. I had done the right thing. By staying away from him I would eventually forget him. I just needed more time. I would have plenty of time from then on, considering I didn’t plan to see him again.
Yet this thought that was supposed to reassure me only added to my distress.
How had this happened? Since when had my desire to see Bécquer overcome my wish to sell my manuscript? Today my dream would come true. I was about to sign a two-book deal with one of the most prestigious publishing houses in the country. I should be elated, but I was not. I was upset and apparently jealous because a young, pretty girl had caught Bécquer’s attention.
I tore my eyes from the small sedan blurred by the raindrops streaming down my window and, forcing myself to bury this futile yearning for a man who was not human and thus forbidden, I turned off the ignition and stepped outside.
Behind the curtain of rain that fell unrelenting from an overcast sky, Bécquer’s house loomed in front of me, its impressive mixture of modern architecture and Pennsylvanian charm more apparent now without the orange lights that had framed it on Halloween night.
Holding my umbrella with both hands to fight the gusts of wind that threatened to yank it away, I dashed across the gravel expanse, and climbed the stairs to the porch. The door opened before I knocked and a young woman appeared in the opening. Although her face was in shadows, my suspicions were confirmed when I recognized Rachel, the red-haired girl from Café Vienna.
“Come in,” Rachel said, moving brusquely aside. “Bécquer is waiting.”
It sounded like a reproach the way she said it, as if she was accusing me of making him wait. But I wasn’t late, I knew, and as if to prove me right, the antique clock sitting in the hall sounded the hour.
Without glancing back, the girl disappeared into the great room. She obviously meant for me to follow but I hesitated as I considered the puddle forming in the wooden floor underneath my umbrella.
“Excuse me,” I called to her. “Could you tell me where to leave this?”
The girl stopped and turned and for the first time she met my eyes.
She was young. Younger than I remembered. Ryan’s age was my guess. Or maybe she seemed younger because, unlike at Café Vienna, she was wearing no make-up. And in her pale, freckled face her eyes showed red. Not flashing red that would have marked her as immortal, but red and swollen, as an indication that she had been crying. In fact, she seemed about to burst into tears at any moment as if my question had pushed her over her limit.
“It’s all right,” I hurried on, “I’ll leave my umbrella outside.”
I grabbed the doorknob but, before I could turn it, a young man materialized by my side.
“Please give it to me,” he said. His deep baritone voice was surprisingly gentle as he addressed the girl. “Don’t worry, Rachel. I’ll take care of this.”
He was young, mid-twenties probably, with broad shoulders and muscled forearms his tight sweater couldn’t conceal and, unlike Rachel who seemed overwhelmed by emotion, his manners were brisk and efficient.
After he relieved me of my coat and umbrella, he offered his hand. “I’m David,” he said.
“Carla Esteban.”
David smiled. “Rachel will take you to Bécquer’s office,” he told me. “And Rachel?” he called as the girl waited for me to join her. “Try to smile.”
If anything, Rachel seemed even more distressed by the young man’s attempt to lighten her mood. Tears welled in her eyes.
Had Bécquer tired of her already? But that didn’t seem right. If he had, he would have stopped charming her and she would have forgotten him. Bécquer was not cruel that way, or so Federico had led me to believe.
Not knowing what else to do, I offered the girl a tissue. She thanked me and, after drying her eyes, slid it into the pocket of her jeans and started again across the great room with the grand piano at one end, and through the door that led to the corridor where I had followed Beatriz after she injured Bécquer the night of the party. But instead of turning toward the library, Rachel stopped before the door directly across and knocked.
“Come in,” Bécquer called from inside. Bécquer’s beguiling voice invited me in. I felt like fleeing, but it was too late. It had been too late for a long time. Probably since the moment he had told me he liked my book the first time I ever met him.
In my struggle to keep my feelings at bay, I almost missed the quiver in the girl’s voice when she announced my arrival.
“Thank you, Rachel,” Bécquer said. “You may leave now. But please come back in half an hour for I will need you to make some copies.”
Rachel nodded, and then turned and left.
From behind the massive mahogany desk where he sat, Bécquer stared at me.
“Please come in,” he said and smiled. The smile lit his handsome face, which was paler than I remembered it and somehow thinner. But his eyes, dark on mine, did not smile.
I mumbled my welcome, and stepped forward toward the empty chair that Bécquer indicated with his hand. Before I reached it, I sensed a movement to my left and turned just in time to see Richard stand.
“You remember Richard?” Bécquer asked.
“Of course.”
I had been so intent on keeping my feelings blocked from Bécquer’s mind, I’d failed to notice the man who held my future in his hands. But Richard seemed undaunted by my omission, if anything he seemed nervous, for his voice was louder than necessary, his smile brighter than meeting me, an almost unknown author, would warrant.
“We just finished discussing the last points of your contract,” Bécquer said to me after we were all seated. “Do you want me to read it to you now?”
I shook my head. “Actually I’d rather read it on my own.”
Bécquer started.
“Sorry, I don’t mean to insult you in any way. But I find it difficult to follow when someone reads aloud.” Especially if it’s you, I thought but didn’t say.<
br />
“I understand.”
He didn’t carry his arm in a sling anymore, but as he handed me the document over his desk, I noticed several scars on his hand just before his fingers touched mine. I shivered.
“You can move closer to the fire,” Bécquer said, “if you are cold.”
I noticed then there were, indeed, some logs burning in the fireplace, which surprised me for I had assumed immortals didn’t feel hot or cold. Maybe I was wrong. Or maybe Bécquer had lit it for us.
I shook my head. “I’m fine,” I said, although I wasn’t. But it wasn’t the fire I wanted to get closer to. And I wasn’t cold either.
The contract was typed this time and simply written. It covered all the points I wanted covered and some I had not considered. I handed it back to him when I was finished and thanked him for his hard work for the contract was clearly in my favor.
“Shall we proceed then?” There was a hint of relief in his voice.
As I nodded, he produced a black fountain pen and signed first, above his printed name. Then Richard got up and, coming to the table, added his signature below.
“I hope our partnership continues,” Richard said handing me the pen, “after these two books are done and sold. And I hope — ”
What he hoped for I never knew, because just then, Bécquer reached forward to take the contract I had already signed, and as he did his pen rolled out of his reach. Richard jumped forward and grabbed it as it fell. His eyes on Bécquer, he set it on the table. Bécquer glowered at him.
Before any of them spoke, there was a knock at the door. Following Bécquer’s invitation, Rachel came in and, taking the contract from the table, moved to the copying machine by the farther wall.
Soon she was done and, after handing a copy to each of us in a black folder, she left as silently as she had come.
Richard looked at his watch. “I better go,” he said, getting up, “if I want to catch the five-thirty train.”
He bent over the desk as he spoke and shook Bécquer’s hand — with both of his — for a long time and with an eagerness that betrayed his deep affection for him and made their previous silent confrontation even more puzzling.
“I’ll call you tomorrow,” Richard said.
Bécquer nodded, his face unreadable, but when Richard asked me if I could give him a ride to the train station and I said yes, Bécquer’s eyes, once more, flared with anger.
“That won’t be necessary,” he told Richard. “Rachel will take you, as agreed.”
“I really don’t mind,” I said. Both because I had time to do so and because it was obvious to me that Rachel was too upset to drive. She had not uttered a word while she was in the room, and her hands had shaken when handing us the copies.
“But I do,” Bécquer said. And as I looked at him, nonplussed, he added, “I need you to stay a moment longer so we may discuss the termination of our contract.”
“Another time, then,” Richard said brightly, shaking my hand. He had turned his back to Bécquer so Bécquer couldn’t see his face, and, as he spoke, his eyes sent me a message I failed to understand. I frowned; Richard sighed in frustration, and turning toward Bécquer, repeated his goodbyes.
“Please, sit,” Bécquer told me as the door closed behind Richard.
“My job as your agent is done,” Bécquer continued after I complied. “I sold your manuscript. Our contract is now finished, and so according to your wishes I have prepared a termination clause to end our partnership. Just take your time to read it and let me know what you think.”
I swallowed hard and took the paper he offered. The clause was short and simple and took only two minutes to read. I looked up.
“Is everything as you expected it?” Bécquer’s eyes held mine, challenging me to argue. A challenge I didn’t take for there was nothing to argue.
“Yes,” I said, my mouth so dry that saying that single word hurt.
He handed me a golden pen. “Would you sign then?”
I didn’t move. Bécquer was right. It had been my wish to terminate the contract. And the reasons for my request were still as valid now as they had been a week past. Being around immortals will always pose a threat to my children. Yet, if I signed Bécquer would disappear from my life as though he had never existed. And I was not ready for that.
“Carla!”
I blinked and averted my eyes for I realized I had been staring at him.
“I’ve already signed,” he added.
Forcing myself to move, I took his pen and signed my name beside his.
“Great,” Bécquer said. Then he smiled sheepishly. “Would it be too much to ask that you make a copy for your records? Rachel is not here at the moment and I’m afraid modern technology eludes me.”
“My pleasure,” I said, trying hard not to roll my eyes in disbelief. I was by no means a technological genius, but being unable to make a copy sounded lame even by my standards.
“I took the liberty of contacting Sarah,” Bécquer said while I set the paper on the glass and pressed start.
“Sarah?”
“Sarah Lindberg,” Bécquer said. “She interned with me some years back. She runs her own agency, now. You may have met her at the party.”
I grabbed the original and the copy still warm from the printing and walked back to his desk.
“She was quite pregnant,” Bécquer continued, and when I nodded, he continued, “I thought she would be a good match for you and she agreed. If you want, I’ll give you her phone number so you may contact her at your convenience.”
Once more, I was having trouble concentrating under his stare and, again, I failed to answer.
Bécquer frowned. “Unless you have another agent already, of course.”
“Of course,” I repeated, then, realizing how little sense I was making, I quickly added. “No, I don’t. And thank you for talking to Ms. Lindberg on my behalf.”
Bécquer nodded. “Sarah will be on maternity leave for several months starting soon. If that is a problem I could suggest somebody else.”
I smiled. The idea I could finish another book in a couple of months was quite laughable considering I was still struggling with the sequel I had just agreed to produce for Richard, because my outline kept changing between the happy ending I had planned when I started and a darker apocalyptic one that fit my somber mood of late. As for the hypothetical novel Ms. Lindberg would be representing, I had not even started it.
“No, that won’t be necessary. I can wait.”
I grabbed my purse, readying myself to leave, but Bécquer didn’t move.
“One more thing,” he added, motioning me to sit again. “I would appreciate if you don’t mention to Sarah the real reasons for our parting.”
“Of course. I couldn’t possibly tell her that — ”
“That you mistrust me?”
I flinched at his directness. “Well, yes. No, I mean, what did you tell her?”
“The official story. That I’m retiring.”
“But it’s not true.”
“Actually, it is.”
“But you weren’t, were you, when you signed me?”
“Things have changed since.”
“Because of Beatriz?”
“Among other reasons.”
“Sorry.”
“Don’t be. I have been an agent for over ten years. Ten great years. Good things are not meant to last forever.”
“What will you do now?”
“Something exciting, I’m sure,” he said lightly. But his eyes avoided mine.
I waited for he hesitated as if he were about to add something. But just then, the phone rang.
Bécquer looked at the number on the caller ID and scowled. “Would you mind?”
He grabbed the phone when I sa
id no, and after the required greeting was over, put the caller on hold. “I apologize but I do have to take this. David will walk you to the door.”
As if on cue, there was a knock and David came in.
“It has been a pleasure working with you, Carla.”
His handshake was firm, his voice professional, and the mind behind his guarded stare already miles away.
“Likewise,” I said and meant it. For meeting him had been a pleasure, before the events that followed turned my life into a nightmare. And now our parting would put an end to the nightmare and things would return to normal. But, although I was perfectly aware that I was the one who had rejected him as my agent, the one who had refused to give him my blood, I didn’t want to leave. Only his casual dismissal, his unconcealed eagerness to return to his call stopped me from asking him to forget everything I had ever told him and begging him to take me back.
Instead, I tore my eyes from his perfect features, lit now by a smile that was not meant for me, and followed David to the hall.
Somehow I managed to stay still while I waited for David to bring me my coat and my umbrella. I even managed to thank him, and not to trip as I climbed down the stairs. and walked back to my car.
The Honda Civic was gone. Which meant it was Rachel’s car, I thought as I ran to mine, the rain pounding on my head because I had not bothered to open my umbrella. After unlocking the car door, I threw my purse and umbrella on the back seat and climbed inside. Finally safe from unwanted stares, I leaned back against my seat and let the sense of loss wash over me.
It was done. I had severed my connection with the immortals. My children were safe, and my life back to where it had been before meeting Bécquer.
Except it wasn’t. For I had met him and fallen for him. And, for all my reassurances that I would soon forget him, leaving still hurt.
A sharp knock startled me. But when I blinked my eyes open, the only sound I heard was that of the water hitting my windshield.
I reached forward to start the car. Again, I heard the sound, a persistent tap coming from my right. And as I turned toward the sound, I saw a face framed in the window. Richard’s face.