He pulled me away from my thoughts by lifting me into his arms again gently laying me down upon the mattress. I watched him silently as he undressed memorizing everything about his body vowing to myself that I’d never forget this moment and the way he looked so intent on loving me. It could be a figment of my imagination, but there was something in his eyes when he climbed on top of me and if it was just my mind running away from me I didn’t want to reel it back. I wanted to live in the moment and just feel him.
His hands cupped my face, and he leaned his forehead against mine as he positioned himself between my legs.
“Say your mine,” he whispered as he looked into my eyes. “I want you. I want all of you, your mind, your body, your soul even your heart just for tonight tell me I have you, Princess.”
My index finger traveled the outline of his jaw as I met his gaze before I leaned up and kissed his lips softly.
“You have me, Mikey, always,” I whispered my words acting like a match that set him ablaze. He thrust into me filling me in one single movement. I watched as he closed his eyes and dipped his head so that his forehead rested on my shoulder. He remained still for a beat, allowing me the time to adapt to the feel of him inside of me. I lifted my hips encouragingly, and he began to move within me. He played me like a fine instrument taking his time as he loved me taking my body to heights I didn’t think were possible. His control was impeccable as he touched every nerve ending in me setting me off like a firecracker.
Mikey didn’t fuck me he made love to me, I never knew there to be a difference until now. Until the moment, he opened his eyes and found mine letting go of his control and exploding inside of me. The intensity in his eyes as he came triggered me to join him finding my own release for the second time.
He kissed me hard his lips bruising mine as he pushed himself off of me withdrawing himself physically and I feared emotionally too. We laid side by side in silence, trying to catch our breath and he reached for my hand intertwining our fingers. He kissed my fingertips before bringing me closer to him, neither of speaking as I dropped my head to his chest and listened to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat.
I don’t know how long we stayed like that so quiet, just holding one another, but it seemed like a long while. His breathing steadied making me think he had fallen asleep.
“Mikey?” I said checking to see if he was in fact sleeping. He remained silent confirming my suspicions. I pressed a kiss to his chest before I allowed myself to give into temptation and speak from my heart.
“I love you,” I whispered. It was funny how speaking aloud three little words that I had been holding onto how letting them finally go free could make me feel so light. I closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep in the arms of the man I loved.
Chapter Twenty-Four
She loved me. Nikki fucking loved me. I stared up at the ceiling with her body draped across mine feeling as if I was suffocating. I gently slipped out from under her careful not to wake her and got out of bed. I pulled on my shorts and looked over at the angel sleeping in the bed that I had loved her in. She loved me.
I swiped my hands down my face suddenly feeling desperate for air. I needed to get out of here and clear my head. I was teetering on the edge deceiving myself by toying with the idea that I could be good enough and worthy of her love. If that wasn’t a joke, I didn’t know what was. I grabbed my T-Shirt quickly pulling it over my head before escaping the bedroom and the desire to give into my feelings. My legs quickly carried me down the stairs and I grabbed the keys that were on the table heading out the door without looking back or giving it a second thought.
I told myself that I wasn’t running away that I just needed a breather a moment to collect my thoughts and pull myself away from the fantasy that I could be the man deserving of Nikki’s love. She had a way about her maybe it was the way she looked at me making me feel like I was something even when I knew I was nothing. I started up the car and pulled out of the retirement community not giving two shits about the speed limit or the annoying bumps that got in my way.
I drove with no direction or destination in mind as I rolled down the windows of the car and let the fresh air engulf me. I tried to erase her face from my memory the way she looked at me when she told me that I’d always have her so sincere as she pleaded with my soul to believe the words she was speaking.
I came back to New York to bury my mother feeling more alone than ever before and found Nikki, who brought me out of the darkness that was bestowed upon me. Before my mother died, I was content with who I was figuring it didn’t matter if I was a closed off self-centered prick and whoever didn’t like it could go to hell. Then I was reunited with Nikki. I watched on as she dated that jerk off all along thinking she deserved so much better than him she deserved someone who wanted to make her his purpose.
She had become my purpose. She was the reason I stayed in New York she was the reason I put any effort into trying to be a good employee of Victors. She was the reason I pulled myself together and got us the hell out of Temptations. She was the reason I began to smile again. She was the reason I started to live again. She made me want to make a life for myself, not just sail through life being just another nameless face. I wanted people to know me for my accomplishments and not my failures. I wanted people to know that I was the man that made Nikki Pastore happy simply by loving her with everything in me.
I pulled the car over to the side shifting it into park as I leaned my head against the steering wheel. In just a few weeks, Nikki had taught me to love without condition to speak without bad intention to give without reason and most of all care without an expectation. I loved her and it didn’t matter if she loved me back it was a gift, but the real gift was that I had been given the opportunity to love her. If I had learned, anything through the death of both my parents it was that life was short and a life without love wasn’t a life worth living.
My parent’s lives may have been cut short but in the short time, they had been given their lives had been full, full of love for one another and for me. I had been foolish enough to think that my life stopped when theirs did that they were the only two people in existence that could love me. I was wrong. I could love again, I could live again and I could do it all with Nikki she could be my purpose.
I lifted my head from the steering wheel and gazed out the window into the darkness. I didn’t have to be alone anymore. I could turn my life around and let myself be happy I just had to be man enough to do so.
I didn’t want to be alone anymore I wanted to crawl back in bed with Nikki where I belonged. I put the car into park and made a sharp U-turn deciding that I was going back to Aunt Gina’s and I was going to wake up my girl and man the fuck up by looking her in the eyes and telling her that I loved her.
“Wake the fuck up little girl,” someone shouted nudging me awake with strong hands. I thought I was dreaming at first and reached for Mikey but my hands grasped a sheet instead of his warm body causing my eyes to flutter open. I lifted my head and screamed in fear, taking in the man hovering over the bed dressed all in black. He was wearing a ski mask and the only feature of his I could make out were the cold green eyes that stared back at me.
“Get the fuck out of the bed and put your clothes on,” he barked, kicking the mattress for extra measure.
I clutched the sheet to my body as my eyes did a quick scan searching for Mikey.
“Looking for your boyfriend?” he laughed coldly. “He left you high and dry,” he cocked his head to the side. “Maybe not dry.”
“You’re disgusting,” I shouted as tears stung my eyes wondering why Mikey would leave me here alone or if this bastard was just fucking with my head. What if he did something to Mikey? He reached for my arm tugging me out of bed resulting in me falling onto the floor. “Get your fucking hands off of me, you filthy pig,” I said through clenched teeth the tears I was holding back falling down my cheeks.
“I bet you like it filthy…,” he said bending down to grab my clothes be
fore throwing them at me. “You’ve got exactly ten seconds to get your clothes on or I’ll drag you out of this house naked your call, but don’t underestimate me,” his tone gravely as he pulled his gun from behind him and aimed it at me.
I was going to die. God only knew where this man was going to take me, but wherever it was would be where he’d kill me. There was no one to save me. Mikey was gone, and I didn’t know if he had left me by choice or if he was in danger. I was going to pay the price for every choice my father had ever made. I robotically began to dress and not because I was willing to be the obedient hostage, but because I didn’t want to be shot dead in the nude. I had seen photos of my father’s associates after they had been killed. The press didn’t care what you looked like when they put you on the front page they just cared about selling papers.
I stood quickly knotting the back of my romper and slid my feet into my sandals just in time for the gunmen to press the barrel of the gun to my temple.
“Walk,” he ordered as his fingers dug into my hip. “If you say one word I swear to god I’ll shoot you dead.”
I obeyed biding my time hoping that someone would come home and see this man abducting me at gunpoint. Tears streamed down my face as he roughly pushed me down the stairs my grip on the banister keeping me from tumbling down them. He tucked his gun into the front of his pants and pulled my hands together.
“What’re you doing?” I asked my voice cracking with fear as I watched his gloved hands bind my wrists together with a zip tie. I flinched in pain as the plastic tightened around my dainty wrists marking my skin.
“Didn’t I tell you to shut the fuck up?” he said taking a fistful of my hair and yanking my head down. “Don’t let me gag that mouth of yours with something and ruin all the surprises I have in store for you.”
I bit my cheek to hold in my screams as he dragged me by my hair out the door. I tried to lift my head and search for someone to help me, but he pulled my head down so that I was forced to look at the concrete as we walked. He released his hold on my hair my head throbbed from the constant pulling and opened the back doors to a black van.
“Get in,” he said kicking me behind my knees so that my legs buckled. I crawled into the back of the dirty van immediately hit with the stench of urine and fought back the urge to gag.
“Where are you taking me?” I cried desperately as he slammed the doors to the van shut.
The engine of the van started my body shifting along the dirty floor as my captor drove off speeding over the speed bumps. I cried out my sobs vibrating off the metal walls of the van reminding me I was alone. It was a horrible feeling knowing that you were the only person who could save you from your own doomed fate. I tried to pull myself together realizing I needed to come up with a plan. I wasn’t going to succumb to defeat. I might die, but I wasn’t going to die without a fight. I kicked my legs against the cage that separated me from the man who had held a gun to my head.
“Do you know who the fuck my father is?” I screamed, using my upper body strength to lift my legs and kick the cage with all my might again. He didn’t say a word and just continued to drive unaffected by my tantrum.
“My father is going to kill you. Do you hear me? You’re going to die. Just let me go before it’s too late. I don’t even know what you look like so it’s not like you have to worry about him finding out. Just leave me here… Please!” I screamed through my tears before falling back against the cold floor in defeat. Nothing I could say would change his mind. I was at his mercy and there wasn’t a damn thing I could say or do to change that. I closed my eyes and prayed to God, he’d make it quick.
Please don’t let me suffer.
I went to unlock the door only to discover I had never locked it, to begin with. I shook my head at my negligence and placed my keys on the table, pausing when I saw my phone. I realized at that moment that I forgot to bring it with me when we went to the bar. I lifted it off the table, turning it around and glanced down at the screen. My eyes widened at the alert that said I had seven missed calls and one voicemail. I unlocked the home screen and first looked at the missed calls, noting they were all from “Don’t Answer”. Shit!
I ran my fingers through my hair knowing I fucked up and I’d have to listen to fucking Jimmy’s mouth now. I went to listen to the voicemail, but my finger lingered over the play button a sickening feeling creeping into the pit of my stomach. I glanced around the quiet house, my instincts shouting at me that something was off but I couldn’t place it. My gut clenched as I hit play…
“I don’t know why the fuck you aren’t answering the phone, but we were set up tonight. You have to get the fuck out of there. They know where you are….”
The phone slipped from my hands and I could faintly hear Jimmy’s voice continuing to dictate what my next move should be. I ran up the stairs climbing two at a time before barging into the bedroom where I had left her. My eyes frantically scanned the room, but she was gone. I braced myself against the doorjamb taking in the sheets in disarray on the bed and the fact that her clothing was missing too.
The door slammed downstairs startling me.
“Nikki?” I shouted out hopefully, hurrying to the stairs quickly making my way down only to find Aunt Gina, Burt, and Nana at the door.
“What’s wrong?” Aunt Gina asked reading my face.
“She’s gone,” I said, swallowing hard before bending down to grab my phone. My hands shook as I tried to call Jimmy. I lifted my head and looked at them. “Nikki’s gone. Someone took her.”
I closed my eyes as I listened to the phone ring waiting for Jimmy to pick up.
Please pick up.
I had no idea what the fuck to do. This was all my fault I should’ve never left her side. I fucking failed her. My call went to voicemail, so I tried again
“Are you sure someone took her?” Nana asked, looking out the window with her pistol in her hand.
“Kid, did you get my message?” Jimmy answered. “You get out of— “
“They took her! Someone took Nikki, she’s not here,” I said, cutting him off before leaning against the wall using it as an anchor to hold me up when all I wanted to do was drop to my knees and fucking scream.
“Fuck! Where the fuck were you when they took her?” He shouted at me.
“I went for a drive,” I said, swiping a hand down my miserable face. “I’m sorry Jimmy. I’m so fucking sorry,” I said, my voice breaking a little more with each word. “What do I do? Just tell me what to do to get her back.”
“We don’t even know where the fuck they took her,” he paused a minute. I didn’t know if he was talking to someone or if he was just trying to calm down and rationalize the situation.
“I’ll go look for her,” I said, knowing that I sounded like a moron a ridiculous moron.
“No. You just stay the fuck where you are in case by some sort of miracle she tries to reach out to you.”
“I can’t just sit here Jimmy. She needs me! I have to find her,” I hollered demanding that he listens to me.
“No, she needs her father since she got kidnapped on your watch. Now, do as I fucking say and stay put and don’t think for one fucking minute I won’t make an example out of your ass. Unlike Vic, I don’t give a rat’s ass whose son you are.”
Anger boiled in my veins, but there was nothing I could say in my defense he was right. Nikki was in danger because of me and me alone. It was my job to protect her and keep her safe and like everything else in my life, I pissed it all away. If I wasn’t so, fucking consumed by my guilt and fear for her safety I’d laugh at the whole idea that while she was being kidnapped I was starting to believe I was the right man for her. Who the fuck was I kidding?
“Jimmy, what’re they going to do to her?” I said, breaking down feeling the hot tears fall from my eyes onto my cheeks.
“I don’t know, but the man who took Nikki didn’t take her out of the goodness of his heart. He’s a stone cold animal. If we don’t find her soon, I don’t k
now what he’ll do to her. That man is capable of anything.”
I pictured her face that smile of hers haunting me when I closed my eyes. I had never been more frightened in my life. I dropped the phone and slid to the floor bringing my knees to my chest as I prayed to my parents asking them to watch over the woman I loved.
Chapter Twenty-Five
It’s true what they say when one of your five senses are impaired the others work overtime for you. I know this now because after my father’s enemy abducted me, he had taken me to an abandoned warehouse and only allowed me a few moments to take in the hell that I was in before he tied me to a metal chair and blindfolded me. He robbed me of my vision, forcing me to rely on my other senses to get me through this ordeal. Not being able to see caused everything to seem louder, especially the droplets of water that leaked from the roof onto the concrete almost sounding as if someone was tap dancing. My sense of smell was working overtime the stench of urine so strong along with the foul smell of something that I chose to label as a dead animal my brain refusing to think that there were human remains anywhere near me.
My body stiffened automatically going on high alert at the sound of someone’s feet padding across the concrete. I whimpered realizing he was back. He had been relatively easy on me sparing me all the horrible mortifying things I feared he’d ultimately do to me, but there was only so long he’d wait before he inflicted the torture planned for me.
He hovered over me, his scent making me wonder if I made it out of this if I would always remember the way he smelled. I shuddered at the thought that I’d take the memory of him forever with me. I held my breath as I felt his fingers on the back of my head. Was this it?
The Tempted Series: Collectors Edition Page 25