“Get on your feet.”
He crawls to the wall, holding on for leverage as he gets to his feet. I glance over at the woman in the kitchen who looks unfazed by all this, making me wonder what kind of shit she saw regularly.
“Don’t come back here without my money,” she says, pointing the utensil she’s using to cut drugs with at Vinny. I see red the minute the words leave her mouth and turn my attention back to Vinny. It settles in that he was trying to shake down A to give this crack whore money. He was trying to take food from his own kid’s mouth to pay this bitch for drugs. He could give a fuck less that he hasn’t supported his son never mind that he’s missed a year of his life.
I grab him by the back of his shirt and drag his sorry ass to the door, thinking all the while I should fucking kill him. There’s a chance I might but when Luca grows up and asks what happened to his old man, I don’t want him to know how much of a monster I can be. I know what it’s like not to have a father. This piece of shit is still Luca’s dad – I won’t be the man who robs him of a father.
I drag him down the flights of stairs and push him out of the heavy fireproof doors into the courtyard of the apartment building. I don’t care about the bystanders that are huddled in the corner around a fire they made inside a trashcan. They’ve probably seen a lot worse shit than what I was about to do to Vinny.
I push him up against the wall by his neck and stare into his bloodshot eyes. I can hardly believe that my beautiful Adrianna ever hooked up with someone like this, but who am I to judge? My fist collides with his jaw.
That’s for taking advantage of my girl.
He tries to turn his face, lift his hands in defense, but my hands are too quick and I punch him again in the same spot. His lip splits open and blood trickles from his mouth as he turns the other cheek, giving me a fresh piece of his face for my knuckles to bruise.
That’s for making her fall for you.
He pulls back his hand attempting to fight back but my hand closes over his wrists as I twist his arm, breaking it or at least fracturing it. He cries out in agony and it’s like music to my fucking ears to hear him sing in pain.
That’s for getting her pregnant.
Vinny slides down the brick wall holding his wrist with his free hand. I stop, making him think the beating is over. He lifts his head to meet my gaze and begs me to have mercy on his pathetic soul. I lift my boot and stomp on his balls, applying just the right amount of pressure that his eyes roll behind his fucking head.
That’s for leaving her pregnant and alone.
I bend over him grabbing the sides of his head with my hands, lifting his head off the ground slightly just to slam it back down. I can’t explain the rage inside of me for this man–it’s lethal consuming every ounce of my fucking existence.
That’s for not being the man she needed.
“Stop it! Please, I beg of you,” he cries pathetically. “Whatever it is, whatever I owe you I’ll get you your money,” he wails, spitting blood as he talks.
The sweat beads on my forehead as I punch him in the ribs, knocking the air out of his lungs.
That’s for Luca.
“Help!” he screams, his voice echoing through the courtyard. I’m sure no one watching would even try to call the cops and save his sorry ass.
“You stay the fuck away from Adrianna and Luca, do you hear me?” I say through clenched teeth.
“You want to poison your life, do it, but if I ever hear of you inflicting that poison on them again, so help me God I will kill you.”
“That’s my woman and my kid!” he mutters.
“Yeah? You support that kid? Or you looking to use that little boy and the DNA you share to get your next fix?” I pressed my foot against his crotch again.
“Who the fuck are you?” he wails.
“I’m the man that was there when your son came into this world. I’m the man that will do anything to keep the likes of you away from him.”
“I’m his father.”
“Never acted like a father so that card holds no merit in my book,” I hissed, the adrenaline in my body making me dizzy.
“It all makes sense now,” he groaned, rolling onto his side in pain. “You’re the guy,” he said hunched over in pain. I rise to my full height and stare down at the poor bastard with his lip split in two, his body bruised and battered. His eye swollen, his wrist definitely broken, and he was spitting up blood. He lifts his head and peers at me to the best of his ability.
“You’re the one beating the ever living fuck out of me but who gets to hurt you? Who gets to fuck you up for what you did to her?” His words slap me in the face, making me take a step back. “It’s Anthony, right?”
I stay perfectly still as I stare at the bloody mess of a man who took the beating I handed him and slapped me with those hard cold words of truth.
“You can think whatever the fuck you want about me but I loved her. I loved her all the while she still loved you. I thought I could love her enough, it wouldn’t matter that she didn’t love me.” He struggles to sit up and I almost want to hold out my hand to help him but I bet he’d spit on my hand at this point.
“I never fucking stood a chance with Adrianna. I knew she was damaged, she was broken, and still I couldn’t help fall in love with her. The thing was I was foolish enough to believe I could fix what you broke.” Vinny shook his head, groaning as he sat up and lean against the wall. He reached behind his head and pulled his hand back to stare at the blood that painted his fingertips.
“You’re right. I’m no good. I’m not a good man, hell, I have no business being that perfect boy’s father, but I’ll get what’s coming to me. I’m my own worst enemy, the drugs will kill me one day, and if they don’t then one of the dealers will,” he says shrugging his shoulders.
“I’ll pay for every bad thing I’ve done to them but when do you pay for what you did to her? Who makes you pay for breaking her?”
I hold his gaze for a moment, swallowing hard before speaking. “Just stay the fuck away from her. She’s doing her best to make a life for herself and that baby of yours. Leave her be.”
Vinny nodded, leaning over and spitting out blood into the bush beside him.
“You still love her.”
“That’s none of your business,” I growl.
“No, I guess it’s not,” he said, leaning against the wall. “I’ll stay away,” he said, barely audible.
I don’t give him another look as I turn around leaving him and the battle between us in the courtyard. I had to give him credit, for a junkie, he fought back. I may have brought my fists and my strength as my weapons but his were his words and they were just as effective. I walked through the apartment building to the front lobby thinking that this shit between me and A ruined a lot more lives than just ours. Vinny probably was a decent guy when he met A, but her undying love for me ruined him and he succumbed to his own demons. It made me wonder how something that made me feel so fucking good, could be so fucking bad at the same time? How could loving Adrianna and having her love be so destructive?
I got into my car, resolving that I’ll never know the answer. I’ll never know why we were only subjected to pain and suffering when we had this larger than life love for one another.
After Vinny showed up at my doorstep begging me for money, telling me that his dealers were after him I decided I needed to take matters into my own hands. I couldn’t subject my child to this kind of behavior. You may think subjecting him to the mob isn’t any better but I have no choice when it comes to that. Anthony and I are consciously staying away from one another to give Luca a fair shot of rising above the mob. It seems only fair he gets the same from his own father.
They say addiction is a disease but I fear it runs deeper than that for most people. I don’t want my son to grow up battling the same inner struggles his father did. Since Luca was born, Vinny hasn’t attempted to see him or be his dad, making the decision to keep him away from Vinny easier. I’ve been a singl
e mom, doing everything for my son without the help of a man. There is no need for Vinny to be a part of his life – not in the condition he’s in any way.
I dropped the baby at my mom’s as I always do before going to work. The difference being I took a personal day today to straighten this shit out for the last time. I rang the bell, not even sure, if I was at the right place, this was the last address I had for Vinny before he went to rehab. I breathed a sigh of relief when he answered the door for it quickly to be replaced by a gasp.
“Oh my God,” I said, raising my hand to cover my mouth. Vinny’s face was badly beaten, swollen, cut, black and blue. His arm was in a sling and his bare torso wrapped in gauze. Apparently, I was too late and Vinny’s drug dealers had caught up to him.
“Adrianna, please just go,” he groaned.
“What happened?” I ask ignoring him.
Vinny exhaled pushing open the door and turning around to walk back into the house, taking tiny steps. He made very little motion not to cause his battered body anymore pain. I followed him inside closing the door behind me, taking in the disarray of the house.
“Look I won’t bother you anymore for money,” he said, struggling to sit down on the couch.
“It’s best if you just go.”
“Who did this to you?” I asked, helping him sit down on the couch. When people turn bad, the loved ones in their lives forget the good in that person. Vinny’s habits overshadowed the good man he was deep down inside, the man he was when I met him. He tried his hardest to bring me out of my depression, even got me to smile on more than one occasion. It wasn’t his fault that my heart belonged to Anthony, or that I’d never get over my first love, but he sure tried hard to be the man in my life. I will always be grateful to him for my son but I can’t string him along any longer than I already have. I want him to get help more than anything and straighten out his life, but I know you can only lead a horse to water.
He sighed, lifting his face to peer at me through his swollen eyes.
“I had a run in with your…whatever it is you call each other.”
The first person that went through my mind was my father. It was no surprise to anyone close to me that my father and I had a broken relationship.
“Anthony Bologna, Bellini, Mr. Italiano, whatever the fuck his name is.”
My eyes widened, and I stared at Vinny in shock. “Anthony did this to you?”
Vinny remained silent as he stared at me. “The guy is a fucking animal,” he finally said.
“But there is no denying he loves you, even Luca.”
I fell into the chair beside Vinny at a complete loss for words and just listened to him talk.
“I had no right going to your house and asking you for money, especially since you are raising our son by yourself. You’ve never asked for a damn thing from me and here I am, the drug addict, begging you to pay my debts,” he explains, pausing for a moment.
“I deserved what he did to me.”
I lick my lips for lack of response before taking a deep breath and turning back to Vinny. “You need to get help, once and for all. Do you want to kill yourself? Is that it?”
“It’s not that easy,” he replies. “You think that I want this life for myself? I don’t know how to stop this vicious cycle. I’ve spent nine months in rehab and where did that get me? In a crack house the minute I got my hands on some cash.”
I studied him for a moment before reaching into my bag and pulling out the envelope. I played with the ends of the paper for a second before extending the envelope to Vinny.
“There is a check in there for twenty thousand dollars. I don’t know if that’s enough to cover your debt, but it’s all I have,” I took a deep breath. “I don’t even want to give it to you. I don’t trust you enough to pay the people you owe and not buy more drugs but that’s on you.” I pulled out another slip of paper and leaned over placing it on the coffee table, along with a pen. “I want you to sign a letter saying you will relinquish any rights to Luca. He doesn’t have your name, it isn’t even on his birth certificate. You would have a fight ahead of you to claim him but I don’t think you have it in you. I’m not asking you to do this because I hate you or even because I’m mad at you for last night. I want what is best for Luca and sadly, you aren’t that right now.”
I braced myself for a fight but it never came, Vinny placed the envelope back in my lap, grabbed the pen, and signed on the dotted line.
“I don’t want your money, A,” his voice sounding strained as he folded the paper with his signature and handed it to me.
“Thank you,” I whispered, watching him slowly lean back against the couch, a lone tear making its way down his face.
“Do me a favor?” He asked hoarsely. “When he asks about me, don’t tell him I didn’t want him. Let him know I loved him enough to spare him of the burden I am.”
“I promise,” I said softly, my eyes tearing as I stood. I gave Vinny one final glance before placing the envelope and the paper he signed in my pocketbook. “Get better, Vin. You are so much better than this,” I told him, knowing that my words were slowly moving through one ear and out the other.
Chapter Twelve
2014
I reached over, grabbing the half empty bottle of whiskey that rested on my coffee table and filled the glass to the rim. The alcohol splashes over the rim of the glass as I bring it to my lips, the amber liquid trickling down onto the open cuts on my knuckles. I hiss at the sting it causes before bringing the glass to my mouth and taking a hefty gulp.
My phone rings, dancing in vibration across the table but I ignore it like I have done the entire day. I don’t give a fuck who is trying to get in touch with me – nothing matters right now. I take another sip trying to drink away the last four years of my life. Not all the whiskey in all the land would be strong enough to take that task on. Maybe I’m drinking because of the shit I’ve done in the last twenty-four hours, maybe I’m drinking because I gave Lisa her walking papers and fucking my troubles away isn’t an option, or maybe I’m drinking because everything Vinny said is true. I finish the rest of my drink figuring it’s a combination of all three.
I place the empty glass on top of the table and reach for my gun that sits beside the bottle. I unload it, holding the clip in the palm of my hand when I hear someone banging on my door. I stand on my bare feet and shove the empty gun into the front waistband of my pants, not giving a fuck, I am shirtless, and the gun is on display for whoever is on the other end of the door. I run my fingers tiredly over my face and open the door.
Adrianna leans against the wall, arms crossed under her breasts as she stares at me lazily.
“I called,” she explains, her eyes taking me in. All of me, from head to toe, then her almond shaped eyes zero in on the gun tucked into my waistband. I watch her subtly raise an eyebrow before diverting her eyes back to mine. I may have had a couple of drinks in me, but I was alert and I didn’t mistake that flicker in her eyes. I knew that look all too well, spent many a night watching those eyes, and even more dreaming of them. It was the look she gave me every time she wanted me to fuck her senseless. It was the look I could never say no to.
She pushes from the wall and stands right in front of me, dropping her arms to her sides, taking that last dangerous step, putting us chest to chest. I should step back, slam the door in her face, and finish my fucking whiskey. Instead, I stand there eager to see what she’s got, knowing every fucking thing she offers me I will take and take it hard.
Adrianna grabs my hands and lifts them between us tearing her eyes away from mine to inspect my battered knuckles. She brushes her thumb gently across the scrapes that brand my skin her eyes finding mine again, softening as she caresses my hand. I don’t want her soft though, soft makes me want things I am no longer entitled. I want hard, hard I can do.
“Let’s get you cleaned up,” she says barely audible, entwining our fingers and leads me inside forcing me to kick the door closed. I’m fucked.
&nbs
p; She leads me into my tiny bathroom, bending over to open the cabinet beneath the sink. Her fucking ass brushes against my thigh due to the tight space. It takes everything in me not to shift my body and nestle my dick against that voluptuous ass as I bend her over the sink. I run my hand along her hip, sculpting her sweet curves as she straightens up and stiffens under my touch. She slowly turns around so we are facing one another. I don’t utter a single word as she holds the peroxide in one hand and reaches for my gun with the other.
My dick is already hard as a rock but her hand brushes against the front zipper of my jeans sending it into overdrive. She slides her delicate fingers into my pants and a groan escapes my lips as she reaches for my gun and not my cock. I swear she’s playing the little vixen, she smirks but as quickly as she does it, she hides it too. She cocks her head to the side and pulls her bottom lip between her teeth as she stares at me.
“We don’t need this do we?” She asks, placing the gun on top of the sink. I watch her quietly knowing if I speak this will be over before it started and I’m not ready to give her up just yet. She tends to my scrapes and cuts in true Adrianna form tentatively and precisely she sprays the peroxide, blowing her gentle breath over the sting she’s left behind.
I grab her wrist, forcing her to lift her eyes to meet mine. “You need to leave.” I grind out. The whole blowing on the cut thing was enough to snap the little shreds of control I was hanging onto.
She straightens up and leans her back against the wall in front of me, cocks her head to the side as she calls my fucking bluff.
“You don’t want me to leave,” her voice is full of all the things I have tried not to think about for years. The sweet promise of the best fucking sex either of us will ever have.
“No, I don’t,” I say, closing the distance between us. I placed my palms over her head, caging her against the wall and my hard body.
“I want to push you up against the wall and fuck you. I want to fuck you hard and long enough it’ll make up for the four years I haven’t.”
The Tempted Series: Collectors Edition Page 39