“Yeah— “my dad said, dropping a kiss on top of my head. “Dry those eyes, your old man will be back,” he whispered.
Nikki stepped back into the clubhouse, spritzing herself with body spray to cover the scent of cigarettes and walked over to me. She ran her fingers over her hair as she looked knowingly at my dad.
“Come on, let’s see about dying these locks,” she offered.
I’m not sure if she befriended me out of gratitude towards my father or if she genuinely understood my fears. Maybe it was both.
“Thank you,” he said hoarsely.
“Thanks for the stogie,” she replied, grabbing my hands and leading me away. I glanced over my shoulder and watched as Riggs handed my father a bullet-proof vest. He strapped it on over his clothes before walking over to the reaper painted on the wall, laying one hand on the logo that signified the club before bowing his head.
Most people prayed to God but my father prayed to reaper on his back.
Jack Parrish.
My father.
The disciple of the devil.
I’m dancing and I don’t dance. I’m smiling and I don’t smile. I am changed even though I’ve given up on change.
You in the moonlight with your sleepy eyes
Could you ever love a man like me
But that time I saw you I knew with you to light my nights
Somehow, I'd get by
Chapter Ten
I knew he was there before I felt the dip in the mattress and his strong arms wrap around my body, tugging me against him. I could smell his cologne the minute he walked through the door but I remained on my side with my back facing him. I was too afraid to turn and meet his eyes, too scared he’d look right through me—like I didn’t exist or worse send me away. He leaned into my ear pushing away my hair with the tip of his nose before his lips trailed down my neck and pressing his lips against my shoulder.
“I was so scared you wouldn’t come back,” I whispered into the darkness, covering his hands with my own. His hand was twice the size of mine and yet they looked as if they were made for one another.
“I’ll always come back for you, Lace. Even when I shouldn’t. Even when I know you’re better off without me,” he whispered huskily against my ear. I turned in his arms, fueled by the desire to look into his eyes and trust his words. His hair fell in front of his face as it usually did, forcing me to run my fingers through it and push the unruly locks from his expressive eyes. Blackie’s eyes were hazel, changing colors like the tides, depending on his mood. They were the color of caramel as they stared back at me, a shade they only turned when he was at peace, a sign of contentment, a rare occurrence.
Peace.
I could give him that.
“Lacey, sweetheart wake up.”
I heard my father’s voice say, jolting me awake and away from my dreams. I felt his hand gently shake my shoulder, trying to wake me from my sleep. I buried my face in Blackie’s pillow, breathing in the smell of cologne, wishing I could sleep forever…wishing I can dream forever.
“Lacey,” my father said louder, forcing me to lift my head, roll onto my side and look up at him.
He looked exhausted, like he had been up for days, yet when our eyes met his lips curved upward. It was always a mystery to me when he took off on his bike. I thought he was just a man on a bike, a man who loved the open road. This whole ordeal has enlightened me to what it means to be a part of a motorcycle club. The patch on his cut labels him a one percenter, telling me ninety-nine percent of the shit he does is illegal and dangerous.
Which means, today he cheated death. Today he fought and today he won and I’d like to think a piece of him was fighting for me.
The look in his eyes before he left, that murderous look that told me his maker was in control—faded away and he was just my dad. Jack Parrish, the man and father not the president or the man controlled by his mind. I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him tightly as the scent of gasoline assaulted my senses.
“It’s all over, Lacey…everything is going to be okay,” he reassured me as he pulled back and studied my face. “You don’t have to worry.”
“What about Blackie? And Reina? Are they okay?”
He kept his eyes pinned to mine a moment before diverting them away.
“They will be,” he said, voice full of conviction as he dropped his hands to his knees.
“Come on, get your stuff together. I’ll take you home,” he said, rising to his feet and started for the door, making it clear he would not give me much more information than that.
“That’s it?” I scrambled off the bed. “They will be? That’s your answer? That man was looking to take me and if it wasn’t for Blackie he would’ve. What happened to him?”
He paused as he reached the door and turned around, glancing around at the room before his eyes found mine. He bit the inside of his cheek as he stared back at me. He wasn’t an easy man to read, looking at his face rarely ever gave his thoughts away. It was that stone cold look that worried me though, the one that told me the wheels in his mind were turning and nothing good ever came from that. The more my father thought the worse things were—for everyone.
“We’ll talk more in the car,” he insisted, continuing to stare at me in deep thought. “Why Blackie’s room?”
I shrugged my shoulders.
“It’s closest to the stairs,” I lied, shrugging on my leather jacket.
He didn’t say another word, holding open the door for me and following me out of Blackie’s room. I led him down the stairs, my stomach twisting in knots as I thought of all the possible things he would tell me.
The common room had emptied out for the most part. There were a few stragglers still here, like, Anthony Bianci who I overheard tell my father he was waiting on Riggs.
“Don’t shoot the poor bastard,” my dad told Anthony as he slapped him on the back. “Kid, might just surprise you. Who knows? Maybe he found his heart,” he added, turning towards me. “Let’s get out of here.”
Bianci threw my father his keys, and we walked out of the Dog Pound. I have never been on the back of bike. Never. Well, that’s a lie. I have a photo of my dad holding me on his bike. But take a ride on one? No, never.
I slid into the front seat as my father adjusted his mirrors and seat. He looked ridiculous sitting behind a steering wheel, almost comical and it doesn’t matter how many times I tell him, or tease him he always insists that I’m being ridiculous. The man was born to straddle a Harley. It was like his god given right or something.
I waited for him to start the truck up and peel out of the lot before I spoke.
“Are you going to tell me what happened?”
“That doesn’t concern you,” he clipped.
“Technically, it does. You’ve never lied to me once are you going to start now? I’d like to know what would’ve happened if Blackie hadn’t intervened. I’d like to know what he endured because of me.”
He remained silent, his knuckles whitening as they clenched the steering wheel. I shouldn’t have pressed but there was no stopping me.
“I’m not a little kid who will sit here and believe everything is okay. I learned a lot in the last couple of days. I get it, I get why you wanted to keep me away from your life. It’s ugly. But guess what? Despite all your efforts I’m still a part of it. Jimmy proved that the minute he came looking for me. I’m property of the Satan’s Knights…fair game. I deserve to know what happened because it affects me just as it does everyone else,” I argued.
He swerved, pulling the car onto the shoulder of the Belt Parkway and shifted the gear into park before pinning me with a stare.
“You listen to me and listen good you are not property of the Satan’s Knights. You are no one’s property,” he shouted, startling me, making it the first time my father has ever reprimanded me.
So much for not being treated like a child.
“He didn’t endure anything because of you. That shit is all on me, Lacey,”
he growled. “Is that what this is about? You feel some sort of guilt over Blackie?”
“Are you telling me I shouldn’t?” I asked incredulously. “There aren’t too many people who will choose your life over their own,” I added, angrily.
“It’s his goddamn job to put you first!” He fumed.
That stung, and another lesson was learned…words are one powerful weapon. I’d have to be pickier with my own, make them count, make them hurt, just like my dad’s did.
At least then I’d have a rebuttal.
Now, I just sat there like the young naïve girl he thought I was.
“He’s in the hospital, hanging on but he suffered a heart attack,” he said, finally.
My eyes snapped toward him and my mouth fell open as my heart lurched into my throat.
“A heart attack? What the hell happened to him?”
“Watch your tone Lacey, giving away a whole lot with the way you’re talking,” he warned.
“Giving away what? That I care about Blackie? Of course I do. You have yourself to thank for that because the moment you stepped foot onto that bus to Riker’s he was there for me and he’s never left,” I trembled as my voice shot octaves higher with each word I spoke.
“Shit,” he ground out. “Blackie’s not some knight in shining armor Lacey. He traded places with you because that is his job. It’s who he is. That man has a death wish and everyone knows it, including the man who took him. He loaded him up on drugs. Blackie should be dead right now but he’s hanging on because his body is so immune to the poison he keeps filling it with. He’s not a prince, Lace, he’s the devil clothed in leather. He is the same as me and don’t you forget that!”
“I know exactly who he is and I accept him as he is…the same way I accept you,” I insisted.
I wasn’t sure if he was trying to scare me away or warn me but either way it didn’t matter. I knew Blackie had a drug problem I saw it with my own eyes that night. But, he was still a man, a broken man who lost his way. He could push me away, try to make me hate him, but I’ve known him nearly all my life…I know how good he can be.
“Best-case scenario, he makes it out of this and gets the help he needs,” my dad added.
“And worse case?”
“He cheats death only to beckon for it to come again,” he said as he pulled the truck back onto the Belt. “Can’t make someone live when they don’t want to. You can’t keep them breathing when they want to suffocate.”
I stared at him as he fixed his eyes back to mine
“Blackie’s at the end of his rope, Lace.”
I restrained from shaking my head and telling him to shut up that he was wrong. Blackie may be at the end of his rope, but I was going to give him another inch, I was going to be the one who pulled him back.
Just watch and see.
I fell back against the seat and stared out the window.
“I’m sorry you had to see everything you saw,” my father whispered. “The world isn’t always pretty but the one me and Blackie live in is downright ugly.”
Duly noted.
Words.
They wound but they don’t change the way a person feels.
Luckily, neither of us uttered another until he pulled up in front of my mother’s house. She was on the stoop waiting for me, her arms crossed against her chest and a worried look adorned her pretty face. I climbed out of the truck just as my father slammed his door shut. He walked around the truck, meeting me at the curb.
“Lace…”
“Thanks for keeping your promise,” I interrupted, reaching up and throwing my arms around his neck.
Daddy’s little girl.
Until you’re not anymore.
Until there is another man.
And sometimes he’s just like the first man you ever loved.
Sometimes he's just like your dad.
Chapter Eleven
I conned my mother into lending me her car, told her I needed a break from the last few days. The reality of my father’s life was harsher than I could’ve imagined. She bought the act, handed over her keys and I made a beeline for the hospital.
To be honest, I don’t think she bought my little act at all. I think my mother knows me better than she lets on. In fact, I sometimes think she’s a witch and knows all my secrets. It wouldn’t surprise me if she even surmised that I was going to see Blackie but for whatever her reasons were, she didn’t try to stop me.
I should be more cautious, try to make more of an attempt to mask my emotions, make it harder for her to read me but it wouldn’t work. My mother knows me but, more than that, she knows herself. She lived what I am living. I wouldn’t be naïve to say she condones my feelings, but she gets them. She’d be a hypocrite to try to stop me.
It makes me wonder about my parents when they were young and in love, mainly my mother and what she was like when she was property of Parrish.
Property of Parrish.
I’m sure there are women who would cringe at being called someone’s property. But there are a few things I know about the MC world and being a man’s property doesn’t mean he owns you but more that you own his heart.
You belong to his heart…to his soul, whatever is left of it.
Love, it’s the only purity men like my father and Blackie have.
And to own that solitary piece of him…well, it’s bigger than all the I love you’s any man can say.
So, when I say I want to be Blackie’s property don’t look at me with pity.
Keep your pity.
Because being Blackie’s property means I own the only piece of him that isn’t black.
Being Property of Petra is owning his heart.
It’s restoring his soul.
It’s the unspoken I love you.
It’s the unspoken vow to honor and cherish, protect and love one another.
It’s belonging to the one person in this world created just for you.
At least that’s what it means to me.
But what do I know? I’m just a girl who’s been sheltered from the life she was born in to.
My stomach twisted in knots as I made my way into the hospital. I had no idea what floor he was on or what unit he was in but I quickly learned he was in intensive care. They allowed me to go upstairs to the unit but when I was buzzed in the nurse told me there was already a visitor and there was only one permitted at a time. I pleaded with her to make an exception but she wouldn’t budge, closing the door to the unit and leaving me in the hallway.
Now what?
The elevator chimed behind me causing me to turn around as the doors opened and I came face to face with Riggs.
The universe isn’t my friend.
It hates me.
“Ah, shit,” he groaned, stepping off the elevator as he ran his fingers through his hair. “What the fuck?” he asked the ceiling before pinning me with a glare. “Your father know you’re here?”
I rolled my eyes.
“I suppose you’re going to run back and tell him,” I accused.
“Fucking, Blackie…Man. Shit! Shit! Shit!” He rambled.
“How do you know I’m not here for another reason?” I said, placing my hands on my hips, cocking my head to the side as I challenged him. “Maybe I’m here picking up a prescription for birth control.”
He narrowed his eyes.
“It was one time!”
“What are you talking about?”
“What do you mean what am I talking about? What are you talking about? You know what? I don’t care. I have zero fucks left,” he ranted.
“Are you okay?”
“No! I’m not okay. I have a pea. And a baby mama. And Bones in my ear telling me to own it…imagine? Me owning responsibility for something? It’s fucking crazy. You should probably pick up that birth control or this could be you,” he said, as he swiped his hand down the length of his body.
“Breathe, Riggs,” I instructed, watching as the badass biker had a meltdown.
“I’m
going to be a dad,” he hissed.
“Congratulations,” I smiled, earning me a glare in response. I guess impending fatherhood wasn’t on the agenda.
“Not funny,” he ground out, moving to walk around me. I quickly side-stepped him, blocking him by lifting my hand to his chest.
“Wait! Look, I’m sorry you’re having a crisis and all but I need your help,” I pleaded.
“Oh, hell no!” He shook his head. “I am not getting involved in this shit. Are you fucking crazy?”
“Riggs! I have to see him,” I said, desperately.
“No, I don’t know what the hell is going on with the two of you and shit, I don’t want to know but I am not getting involved.”
I raised an eyebrow when he stomped his foot to drive his point home.
Poor guy, he was falling apart.
“Riggs, please,” I tried. “I want to see for myself that he’s okay.”
“Your father will kill you, him and me!”
“He doesn’t have to know,” I countered.
“Right,” he said sarcastically, lifting his eyes to the glass door. “Fuck, I know I’m going to regret this. Wolf is coming this way, go fucking hide somewhere,” he hissed.
“Where?”
“Behind the goddamn plant. I don’t know just scram,” he said, shooing me away.
I scrambled toward one of the chairs in the waiting room, lifting a magazine to my face as Wolf strutted out from the intensive care wing.
“Well it’s about time you showed your pretty face,” he seethed. “I’m fucking beat.”
“Yeah, sorry. I was dealing with the end of my freedom,” Riggs replied. “How’s he doing?”
“No change,” Wolf said, yawning. “I’m getting out of here. I’ll be back in a couple of hours.”
“Yeah, no worries, I’ve got it from here,” Riggs assured him.
“You okay?” Wolf asked suspiciously.
“Peachy,” he replied.
“Being a father isn’t a bad thing,” Wolf told him.
“No, of course not. This coming from a man with three sons. I wonder if you had a defiant little girl, what you would say?”
The Tempted Series: Collectors Edition Page 131