by ZL Morris
Heavily, I sit back down on the chair. He slowly crouches down in front of me, but doesn’t touch me. “They thought we’d keep you extra close because of who you are to us. The only solution was for you to stay away. To only have you visit here for the bigger events and celebrations. Then our dads sat your dad down and told him.”
Overwhelmed by the familiar sensation of abandonment, tears roll down my face. “I believed the other children didn’t want to be my friends anymore. I-I thought all the mummies and daddies knew my momma was human and that’s why they didn’t want me here.”
Quimby and Theo quickly rush over and kneel at my feet next to Kenji. With all of them so close, my whole body starts to tingle. The sensation causes me to gasp.
“You feel it, don’t you? The tingles? It’s the bond between us.” Hesitantly Quimby reaches up and places his hand against my cheek. Instantly, my body warms under his touch. The tingles turn into a comfortable buzz.
Following their brother’s lead, Kenji places a hand on my knee, and Theo grasps my hand. The buzz in my body intensifies, but not enough to be uncomfortable. My stomach feels like I have huge dragons swooping around in it from their close proximity.
I don’t know if it’s their touch, but I don’t feel so out of control. Though, I’m not sure what to make of all they have revealed…
Holy shit! I have three mates!
I try to ignore the niggles of self-doubt at the back of my mind and allow myself a moment to relish in their touch. I throw caution to the wind and lean forward, slowly lifting my arms up. As best as I can, I pull all three of them into my embrace.
For the first time ever, I feel like I truly belong. Even if I don’t know how long it will last.
CHAPTER NINE
- Tallulah -
I’ve no clue how long we sit huddled up together before Quimby unexpectedly laughs.
Confused by his weird reaction, I poke at him. “What are you giggly at, doofus?”
“Did you not hear our mum sneak down the hallway? She sounds like a stampede of elephants.”
The door opens, and we all look up. Rosalina’s head cautiously pokes around the gap in the door. Her eyes scan the room before she finally settles on us. Surprise flickers across her face for a brief moment, and I wonder if she knew this was going to happen when I left the office. “Hey, guys, happy to see the place is still in one piece, and I’m glad you’ve finally settled on telling Tallulah.”
Kenji winks at me and calls over his shoulder, “Come on, Ma, I believed you had more faith in Tally than that. She’s a little hellion, but I don’t think she’d actually trash the joint.”
“Hey!” I shove at his shoulder. “If I remember correctly, it was you who broke the blue vase when we were little.”
Rosalina gasps, and I’m surprised it sounds so close. Glancing up, I realise she moved farther into the room. “I knew it was one of you who broke it, I just couldn’t prove it. Your fathers told me the vase disappeared long before then.”
Kenji grabs my sides and tickles. When I attempt to squirm away, Theo and Quimby grin mischievously and hold me still while Kenji attacks.
Laughing, I shout. “Enough, enough!”
His voice full of innocence, “It might’ve been me who broke it, but it was Theo who buried the evidence in the vegetable garden. Dads are also the ones who went down there a few days later to dig the thing back up to dispose of properly.”
I barely hear her mutter under her breath, “They have another think coming if they still expect a reward later.”
“Mum!” Horrified, Quimby’s nose scrunches up like he smelled something bad.
She waves off his horror. “Don’t be such a sissy, Quimby, you have your own mate now.”
Did she just refer to sex? Oh, god. I drop my head onto Theo’s shoulder to hide my mortification.
Theo must sense my discomfort because he wraps his arms around me and smoothly changes the subject. “Would you like to watch a film?”
I mumble awkwardly into his shoulder. “I’d like to head to bed for a little while, if it’s okay.”
All three of them share a look of disappointment, but don’t try to change my mind. Before I can stand, the guys surprise a laugh out of me as all three of them offer a hand to help me up. Theo chuckles and takes one hand, Quimby takes the other, while Kenji gently takes hold of my waist.
Every one of their touches causes tingles to shoot through my body. Theo’s, Quimby’s, and Kenji’s hands on me at one time causes some delicious shivers to play along my nerves. It’s definitely time to get out of here before I embarrass myself by acting a fool. Especially since their mother’s in the room.
Once I’m steady on my feet and the danger of wobbling and landing on my face is over, I expect them to release me, only they don’t. Instead, Kenji wraps one arm around my back and the other under my backside and hoists me up. Quimby and Theo both raise my hands and kiss my palms before they let go.
The arm around my back tightens a fraction until my body presses firmly against him. Barely able to stifle the groan that wants to escape, I press my face tightly against Kenji’s neck. An unfamiliar touch lands on my back causing me to flinch. Quickly, I bring my head up and almost catch Kenji on the chin.
Rosalina stands slightly to the side of Theo. It’s her hand I felt on my back. She smiles kindly at me and brushes my hair back. “Sweet dreams, honey.”
“Night,” I offer a shy smile in return.
Kenji carries me down the hallway towards the guest bedroom. Once outside the closed bedroom door, I feel him hesitate. I lean my head back, make eye contact, and raise my eyebrows, silently asking him what is wrong.
“I-I um… We…” Firmly pressing his lips together, he sighs in frustration. “When we knew you were our mate, the guest bedroom became your room. Obviously, we already knew your favourite colour and stuff, so…” he trails off.
We’ve dealt with enough turmoil already today, and I don’t want to be the cause of any more. Cautiously, I reach up until my hand gently touches his cheek and offer him, what I hope, is a gentle smile. “Will you show me? Please.”
He smiles shyly at me and leans his head forward. For a second, I hold my breath with the guess he’s about to kiss me. Instead, he places his cheek against mine. For the few moments his cheek is pressed to mine, I breathe in his smell and enjoy the slight stubble on his jaw against my own. Then the arm he used to support my back loosens slightly until he can reach the door handle.
Behind me, the door creaks softly before it opens all the way. Instead of peeking, I watch Kenji’s face closely. He secures his hold on me again, so I’m tucked tightly against him. His chest brushes firmly against my own when he takes a deep breath and holds it while he steps into the room. I can tell he’s nervous, but don’t understand why.
Finally, I drag my eyes away from his worried face and take a good look around the room. The main wall is purple with the surrounding walls a warm cream colour. A huge bed up against the purple wall has a large purple bedspread on it, almost the same as the one I have at home. Various sized purple and cream cushions are scattered on top. It gives the room a look of what I imagine a fancy hotel might be like.
“It’s beautiful.” At my words, his chest deflates as he releases the breath he held while I inspected the room, no longer nervous about my reaction.
My eyes catch on a huge collage of pictures in one big frame above the dresser, and I gasp. His body becomes rock hard under my fingers from sudden tension. Kenji must sense what caught my attention. He stalls for a second, but then cautiously walks us closer to the pictures.
I spot a photo of the four of us from when we were two years old and Theo six. Theo sits in the middle with a twin on each side of him, I’m snuggled up on his lap. The children in the picture have got huge toothy grins on their faces. A lump forms in my throat as I begin to recognise some of the other pictures. All of them are taken after that summer. I’m in every single one of them, but doing all different typ
es of stuff, training with the guests, jumping around the obstacle course Dad made for me.
My eyes fill with tears when I see a particular picture. I’m perched on one of the huge boulders in the forest. My arms are loosely wrapped around my legs, and my chin is set atop my knees. I was around the age of nine. I’d done a dangerous move on the obstacle course, and Dad had caught me. I ended up in a really nasty fight with him over it. Afterwards, he grabbed an axe and broke the part I’d done the silly stunt off.
In many of the photos, I didn’t know there was a camera there. I bite my lip to force the tears back. It’s then I realise, instead of gazing at the pictures with me, Kenji openly watched me the whole time.
Not needing to feign tiredness, I attempt to clear the roughness from my throat. “I should get some sleep.”
He rubs his hand up and down my back and the tingles reignite across my body. “Are you all right, darling?”
So he doesn’t pity me, I force my voice to sound more chipper, “I’m fine, honestly. Today’s been hectic, and I’m likely overtired.”
I can tell he doesn’t believe me, but I don’t have the energy to reassure him. He seems to realise I don’t intend to explain further because he walks over to the bed. Gently, he lowers me until I sit on top of the soft blankets. After he releases me, he leans forward slightly and places his hands on either side of my hips. His body crowds my space and effectively blocks me from any escape.
“I understand it’s been a big day for you, but please don’t forget we’re here for you. Whatever’s bothering you… We want to help. We’ll give you tonight, but please don’t shut us out.” Emotion thickens his voice, and his eyes swim with unshed tears.
My heart squeezes painfully at the hurt in his expression. Without any thought of the consequences, I lean forward and brush my lips lightly against his. “I promise, I just need to be alone for a while. Today’s been a lot to take in, and it’s a struggle. If I still have a tough time tomorrow, then I promise I’ll talk to you guys.”
“Okay, darling.” He smiles sweetly before he places another quick kiss on my lips, then straightens to leave. Once he reaches the door, he hesitates for a moment, indecision flashes across his face.
Breath held, I hope he’ll leave me alone for a while.
He finally huffs out, “Night,” before he steps into the hallway and shuts the door softly behind him.
As soon as the door is firmly shut, my shoulders droop, and I release the breath I held. Without anyone around, I can give up on the pretence of acting normal. Unable to stop myself from one last glance at the pictures across the room, my eyes rapidly fill with tears and spill over.
Why couldn’t they have been with me? Why did I have to go through all the hurt and heartache believing nobody wanted me? They say they want me now, but at what cost?
CHAPTER TEN
- Tallulah -
Desperate to stop the tears, I squeeze my eyes shut, but it doesn’t work. My chest squeezes tight with rapidly building up sobs. Face first, I flop into the pillows and roughly bury my head as the first sobs erupt. There is no fight in me against the havoc of my emotions. I just pray no one comes to investigate. They already think I’m weak. If they witness my breakdown, it’ll only cement it for them.
Who knows how long my tears leaked into the pillow, but when I when I lift my head it’s dark outside. The wet pillowcase brushes against my ear, and I straighten up with disgust. Yuck! I rub my still leaky nose on my sleeve, then I take a few breaths to calm down.
My thoughts are a jumbled mess, and I don’t know what to think about or even work out first. I’d rather bury my head in the sand and pray all this will resolve itself, but I know it won’t. I’m really not that lucky.
A soft knock sounds at the door. The boys promised to give me time, so I know it’s not one of them. My only guess is it’s Rosalina. Swiftly, I wipe away any moisture left under my eyes before I call for the person to enter. I’m surprised when Dad steps in instead of Rosalina.
“Hey, Dad,” I croak. Shifting awkwardly, I clear my throat and call out a little louder, “Hey.”
He takes one look at my face, with my red, puffy eyes and blotchy face, and concern fills his gaze. My normally strong and confident father stands with his shoulders slumped, back to the door, as he nervously clutches the bags in his hands. He must’ve just arrived back from the house. His mouth straightens into a flat line as he looks away. It’s instantly clear he’s been informed I know the truth about my mates.
Unprepared for the flush of outrage, I barely choke out, “Why didn’t you tell me?” before my eyes fill and spill over again, heartbroken my dad lied to me.
Unceremoniously, he drops the bags in his rush to cross the room. He sweeps me up in his arms, sits on the bed, and places me firmly in his lap. I’m too big to be cuddled like this, but his familiar smell drapes a blanket of calm around me.
He wraps his arms tightly around my shoulders as he sways slightly back and forth, like he used to when I was sick or had a nightmare. His voice rumbles through his chest, “When things happened with your mother, I vowed to myself I’d protect you with everything I am.” His hand rubs slowly up and down my back. Whether to comfort me or to reassure himself is unclear.
“Henrique and Leverette came to me to explain you were the boy’s mate. They explained how Blood Moon found out too and their threat to hunt for you at the meeting.” His breath quickens and voice drops an octave. “They invited me to the meeting with the three boys, who decided you shouldn’t be with them to keep you safe. I should’ve argued, I understand that now. But you’re all I have left and I just… I couldn’t bear to lose you.”
My tears soak into the cotton of dad’s shirt, but he ignores it. I whisper with a hiccup, “They were my friends, Dad. How could they not tell me? How could it be so easy for them to walk away from the mate bond?”
He pulls back, his warm palms against my cheeks to hold me in place so I cannot pull away. “Those boys didn’t want you to get hurt. They knew it wouldn’t be forever. I know it wasn’t easy for you trying to find your place, but it was never easy for them to be near you and not be with you. They suffered.” He tucks his arms back under me, lifts, and sets me onto the bed next to him.
With a shake of his head, he stands and props his fists on his hips. “They sat in that office as small boys with tears and snot covered faces and told the adults what they wanted. In one day they found out who you were and lost you.” Palpable anger shows in the timbre of his voice. “The hurt of you believing they didn’t want you was far less than what they had to endure. And I’m selfish, I know I am, but I’m glad they were able to wait for so long.”
“They should’ve told me! They left me. They didn’t want me!” My hands smack down on the bed, and pain rattles through my whole body. I know it’s completely unrealistic, but the last couple of days have finally caught up with me.
Dad straightens to his full height, and my skin prickles. I’ve over stepped his acceptable level of self-pity. He moves until he towers over me; his voice is deadly calm. “Tallulah Mardak, I know you’re hurt, but I’m still your father. When I tell you those boys wanted you, that they always wanted you, you will believe me.” His shoulders slump, and he huffs. “I’d die a thousand deaths to have your mother back.”
My whole chest hurts from those words. In disbelief, I watch as he runs his fingers through his hair and moves to the door. “I need to head out because there are more things I still need to see to. Honestly, if I stand here any longer, one or both of us will say something we’ll regret.”
The one permanent thing in my life, my father, walks out of the door without a backwards glance. Shame weighs on my shoulders. We’ve had many arguments over the years, but we’ve always talked it out, not just left it unresolved. His abandonment leaves me more bereft now than before he arrived.
He lost my mum, and for god knows how long, he’s kept me safe. Riled up from the day, I let it get the best of me. My father only ac
ts with my best interest at heart, more so now than ever. Instead of lashing out at Dad, I should ask Theo, Quimby, and Kenji my questions.
Do I really want three men who can ignore our mate bond for fourteen years? Is it something I even want to be a part of?
I’m not sure how long I sit there before I get my ass in gear and go after my father to apologise. Before I can follow, though, the door shakes with another firm knock. If it keeps up at this rate, I’ll need to install a revolving door.
Rosalina sticks her head around the door to offer a sombre smile. I guess Dad and I weren’t at all quiet in our argument. Well, the guys will know what questions I have now.
I take a moment to readjust on the bed and wave her in. Accepting my silent invitation, Rosalina pushes the door open wider and reveals a plate of cookies and a glass of milk in her hands. With my attitude so far today, I wouldn’t be surprised if she came to rub the cookies in my face and dump the milk over my head.
I definitely deserve it.
“I’m”—I hesitate— “I’m sorry you had to listen to all that.” I shake my head with a bitter chuckle. “Bet they’re ecstatic they hit the jackpot with me, right?”
She moves farther into the room and sets the cookies and milk on the bedside table. I guess I won’t be wearing them after all. Softly, she pats my leg to get me to scoot over. After I shift to the middle of the bed, she takes a seat next to me.
Furrowed eyebrows don’t hide the shimmer in her gaze as she searches my face, then takes my hand and squeezes gently. “I won’t say I understand the situation you find yourself in, but I think…” She pauses contemplatively, then reaches across to take two cookies off the plate and offers me one. “Tally, you and the boys need a clean slate. Can I make a request?”
I ponder this for a few seconds and take the cookie. Biting the bullet, I silently nod for her to continue.
“Tomorrow is another day. Hopefully, it’ll also be a better one. Spend time with my boys, give them a proper chance to prove how much you mean to them. I know they let you down, but if nothing else, please know they all love you. But, I understand if you want to give them a little trouble.” She laughs and nudges my shoulder before whispering, “I’d give them trouble, too.”