by RJ Nolan
Just friends. No matter how much Sam knew this was how things had to be, the words still stung. She had never expected to find herself on the receiving end of this speech. Her thoughts went to the women she had said those exact words to, having convinced herself that they weren’t hurtful and she was just being honest and clear in her intent. You were delusional.
“I understand.” And Sam did. She had taken a chance with Christy, and as soon as they became exclusive, those same old feelings of being smothered had surfaced. I won’t do that to Riley. She deserves someone who can be totally committed to her. She rubbed at an ache in her chest, sighing to herself, then reached across the couch and offered her hand. “Friends it is.”
Riley took her hand.
When their gaze met, Sam swore she could see regret lurking in Riley’s dull green eyes. Wishful thinking. She let go of Riley’s hand and stood. “Well, I guess I should go start dinner.”
“Nothing for me,” Riley said. “I’m not hungry.”
Sam shook her head. She forced a smile, determined to not make things any harder on Riley than they had to be. “No can do. As your friend, it’s my job to see that you don’t go hungry.” She held out her hand. “Come on, my friend. I’ll teach you how to make my famous spaghetti.”
Riley put her hand in Sam’s and allowed herself to be pulled from the couch. A tentative smile appeared on her face.
Sam smiled back, and the tightness in her chest eased. I can do this. I can be her friend. The alternative of not having Riley in her life at all wasn’t acceptable, but that didn’t stop the part of her, deep down, that wished she had more to offer Riley than friendship.
* * *
Riley kept her gaze firmly on her plate. You can’t tell her you want to just be friends and then ogle her. Several times while they made dinner, she had caught herself staring at Sam’s breasts. She needed to find an apartment soon.
“No good?”
“No.” Her cheeks burned. “I mean, yes. It’s good.”
“Glad to hear it.” Sam grinned. “You never know what you’ll get when you’re breaking in a new cook.”
It hurt to realize that Sam was fine with just being friends, but Riley knew it was of her own doing. “Well, I was just following instructions. So if the instructions were bad…” She arched an eyebrow.
“Perish the thought.” Sam laughed. “Any luck on the apartment front today?”
See, she wants you out of here too. Riley frowned. “No. Sorry. The places weren’t much different than the ones we looked at yesterday.”
“There’s no rush. Take your time and find the right place.”
Riley was taken aback by the wave of relief that washed through her.
“Would you consider someplace that’s not downtown?”
“Um… Sure. I guess.”
Sam shrugged. “If you prefer downtown, that’s okay.”
That’s when it dawned on Riley that she had unconsciously considered only places her aunt would have found acceptable. Would she ever get away from that woman’s influence? “No. What other areas would you suggest? I have to be able to reach the hospital in thirty minutes, no matter what time of day or night.”
“Well, I was just thinking. After what happened at that last condo we looked at, maybe you’d prefer to live in a gay-friendly or gay-centric area of the city.”
“I never thought of that. I didn’t even know there were such places.”
“You bet there are.” Sam grinned. “You’re living in one right now.”
When she took a moment to think about it, Riley realized she had seen a lot of same-sex couples as she came and went from the apartment. “So where should I look?”
“Let me fire up the computer, and I’ll show you.”
For a moment, Riley wondered if there were any open apartments in Sam’s complex, but she squashed the thought immediately. Too close to temptation.
Chapter 38
Riley leaned back against the couch and tried to catch her breath. Tears of laughter ran down her face. Each new story Sam regaled her with was more outrageous than the one before. “You’re making that up.”
“I’m not. I swear.” Sam crossed her heart. “She was standing on her front porch, naked as the day she was born, holding out these huge breasts and shouting, ‘who wouldn’t love these?’” Laugh lines appeared at the corners of her eyes. “Did I mention she had bright red hair…at least on her head.”
On her head? Oh! Heat shot up Riley’s neck. She mock-scowled when Sam laughed.
“Anyway, the woman was really starting to draw a crowd of neighbors. It was one of my first patrols on my own after my probation period was over, and I was worried I’d have to call for backup. The last thing I wanted to do was have to call for help.”
Riley couldn’t blame her. She didn’t like to ask for help either. After thinking about it for a moment, she realized that wasn’t as true as it had been. She was finding it increasingly easy to ask Sam for help. As she turned more fully toward Sam, her knee bumped the empty popcorn bowl on the couch between them. She set it on the coffee table. “What did you do?”
“I headed for the porch, figuring the quicker I got her in the house the better. As I got close, I could smell the booze on her, like she’d bathed in it.” Sam’s nose wrinkled. “Anyway, she got quiet as I walked up. So I’m thinking, ‘Great, this won’t be so bad.’” She rolled her eyes. “Typical rookie naiveté.”
“She didn’t go quietly, huh?”
“No. I was being careful, keeping my eyes on her as I went up the porch steps. I was sure she didn’t have a weapon… I was wrong.”
Oh no. Riley’s stomach sank. She grabbed Sam’s arm.
The little half smirk on Sam’s face should have warned her. “Yeah. She grabbed me by the front of my shirt and smashed my face into her huge breasts. She was an older woman, but she was strong. I almost smothered before I could get away.”
“Oh. You scared me there for a minute.” Riley shoved at Sam’s shoulder. “Now I know you’re making this up.”
“I’m not.” She held her hands out quite a distance from her own chest. “Those things were dangerous weapons.”
“Did you arrest her for assaulting a police officer with her lethal breasts?”
Sam’s eyes sparkled. She tipped back her head and laughed. “No. I finally managed to get her into the house and, thankfully, into a robe. I never did find out what set her off, but she promised to stay inside and not expose herself to the neighbors, so I let it go.” She stood and brushed salt off her pants. “All that popcorn made me thirsty. You want some water?”
“No, thanks. You go ahead.”
A cell phone rang.
Dang. That was the end of a fun evening. Riley was on back-up call. She leaned over the arm of the couch and reached for her phone where it rested next to Sam’s on the end table. At the next ring, she realized it wasn’t her phone that was lit up.
“Sam. That’s your phone.”
Sam popped out of the kitchen and grabbed her phone. “Hey, sis.” She flopped down on the couch.
Riley rose, intending to give her some privacy. When Sam looked up and caught her gaze, Riley mouthed, “Good night.”
Sam shook her head and held up one finger.
Riley sank back onto the couch.
Sam listened for several moments, then a bright smile spread across her face. “Of course I would. That would be great. Do you need my uniform and gear again?”
What was that all about? Riley caught herself leaning a little closer.
“I have no idea.” Sam’s gaze cut to Riley. “I don’t know, Jess. I—” She shook her head as if Jess could see her. “No. Don’t.” Sam sighed. “Hey, Kim.” She scowled at the phone but listened to whatever Kim was saying. “Okay. I will. I’ll let you know. Love you too. Bye.” She thumbed the screen of her phone and turned to Riley. “How would you like to go to a Halloween party with me? It’s—”
Riley shook her head. “I don’t thin
k that’s a good idea. Sorry.”
“Wait. I know you’re not a big fan of Halloween, but before you say no, let me explain.”
Sam knew only half of it. Meeting Keith at a Halloween party wasn’t Riley’s worst memory associated with the October holiday. The only other time she had attended a Halloween party, she had gotten drunk and lost her virginity in a bathroom at a haunted house while in college.
“Riley?” Sam scooted across the cushions and put her hand on Riley’s arm.
Sam’s touch grounded her, and she shook away the unpleasant memories. “I’m sorry, but I don’t think there’s anything you can say that will change my mind. I let myself get talked into a party last year.” A lump formed in her throat. “We both know how well that turned out. And to be honest, even if I put aside meeting Keith, I really don’t enjoy being around a bunch of people drinking and acting out.”
“That’s what I wanted to explain. This isn’t an adult party. Kim and Jess donate their time at a group foster home for teenagers. Every year, the local community center sponsors a haunted house and Halloween party for the foster kids and their families. And there are a lot of them.” Sam’s eyes grew shadowed. “And most of them are so grateful when someone does something for them or takes an interest in them. The group homes do their best, but special things like this party mean the world to these kids.”
The thought of all those children removed from their families and living with strangers tugged at Riley’s heart. She knew firsthand what it was like to want for attention as a child. “It’s just for the kids?”
Sam nodded. “Last year, Jess and Kim worked in the haunted house. I wish I could have been there, but I was on duty. Jess asked me if I’d help out this year. They’re short on volunteers, so Kim wanted me to ask if you’d consider helping out. What do you say? Will you help?”
Riley gazed into Sam’s shining silvery-blue eyes and found herself nodding.
“Great.”
“Oh, wait.”
Sam’s expression fell.
“When exactly is this party? I have to check my schedule.”
“Halloween night. It falls on a Friday this year.”
After pulling her phone from the charger, Riley called up her schedule. “I’m due to work during the day, but I don’t have call. It’s in the evening, right?”
“Starts early, at six, because of the younger children. Could you maybe get off early?” Sam asked, a wistfulness in her voice.
Riley hesitated. She had never asked anyone to cover for her.
Sam waited, not saying anything to pressure her.
She couldn’t bring herself to disappoint Sam. “I’ll ask Denny if he could cover for a couple of hours.”
The brilliant smile that lit Sam’s face made Riley’s heart thump in her chest. She looked away before Sam could see the desire in her eyes.
Sam whooped. “All right. Now all we have to do is decide what our costumes will be.”
“No way.” Riley shook her head. “You never said anything about a costume.”
“I didn’t?” Sam was the picture of innocence.
Riley elbowed her in the ribs. “I’ll gladly help, but I draw the line at wearing a costume. Not going to happen.”
“Come on. Please?” Sam batted her eyes and worked her puppy-dog expression for all it was worth.
Riley crossed her arms over her chest. “No costume.”
Ignoring her, Sam picked up her phone and scrolled through several screens. She grinned and held out the phone.
Riley gingerly took the phone as if it might grow teeth and bite her.
Sam burst out laughing.
Scowling, Riley looked at the screen. At first glance, she thought it was a picture of Sam with a woman dressed as Dracula but then realized it was Jess and most likely Kim dressed as Dracula. They were surrounded by smiling children. The kids’ faces shone with exuberance.
The corners of Sam’s mouth drooped as if pulled by weights. “You wouldn’t want to disappoint all those children, would you?”
“That’s…that’s…” Riley waved her hands in the air, searching for the perfect word. Her hands dropped to her lap. “That’s so not fair.”
“Yeah. Yeah. But did it work?”
Riley threw her a narrow-eyed look and slumped back against the couch. “Yes.” She tried to hold on to her pique but couldn’t do it. She looked down at the picture again. The thought of making Halloween special for those kids appealed to her.
Sam grinned. “So what do you want to be for Halloween?”
Riley groaned. Wonder if my personal shopper does Halloween costumes? “Someone not in a costume?”
“Come on.” Sam nudged Riley’s leg with her knee. “Let out your inner child. I know she’s in there somewhere.”
Is she? Or had she been ground to dust during all the years beneath her aunt’s heel? Riley’s thoughts went to the baseball game she had attended with Sam several weeks ago. A glimpse of that little girl had appeared that day. Then, just a few days ago, when she had made breakfast for Sam, memories of that happy little girl had surfaced after being repressed for years. Riley called to that child now, releasing that part of herself from the rigid restraint she normally maintained. It was as if a weight lifted off her shoulders, leaving her feeling more lighthearted than she had in years.
* * *
After the last time they had talked about Halloween, Sam sensed that there was more to Riley’s dislike of the holiday than the bad memories attached to meeting Keith. Sam wanted to change that. She was determined to make Halloween fun for Riley. Come on, Riley. I know you can do this.
Riley pulled her legs up onto the couch. She sat cross-legged, scooted around to face Sam, and grinned up at her. “Okay. Let’s figure this out. What should I be for Halloween?”
Relief flowed through Sam; for a moment, she’d thought she had pushed Riley too hard. “How about Wonder Woman?” I think you’re pretty wonderful. An image of Riley in a Wonder Woman costume flashed through her mind, followed by a strong pulse of arousal. On second thought, maybe not. I’d never survive it.
Riley shook her head and laughed. “Ah, definitely no. I don’t do skimpy.”
“Okay. Something less revealing.” Strong female movie characters paraded through her mind. “Let’s see, how about Rion from Lomax’s Revenge?”
“That’s a definite no too.” Riley crossed her arms over her chest. “It’s just exchanging skimpy for skintight.”
Sam grinned. It was worth a try. “All right, then, what about…?” She named several other possibilities.
Riley shook her head at each one. She worried her bottom lip with her teeth. “Um…what about something simple like a cowboy?” She slashed her hand in negation as if she could wipe away the idea. “Never mind. That’s a dumb suggestion.”
“No it’s not.” Sam touched Riley’s knee. “It could be really great.” She pictured Riley in a close-fitting shirt and vest, tight jeans, and a full-length leather duster. Her cowboy hat was pulled down to shade her eyes. And maybe a pair of chaps. Sam groaned to herself. Oh yeah, her ass would look incredible framed by a pair of chaps.
“You really think so?”
Riley’s voice drew Sam from her lustful thoughts. Down, she commanded her wayward libido. “Oh, yeah. Definitely.” Sam flushed. Her voice had come out much huskier than she had expected.
Color flooded Riley’s face. “A… great. Yeah. That’s great,” she stammered. She cleared her throat. “What about you? What are you going as?”
“That’s a good question. Maybe one of the characters I mentioned before.” Sam went through them again, but none of them jumped out at her as the perfect character. She huffed out a breath. “Any suggestions?”
“Well…” Riley’s complexion that had just returned to normal glowed with color. “Never mind.”
Sam swore she could almost feel the heat of Riley’s blush. “Tell me. Please.”
Riley muttered something under her breath.
“I didn’t get that. Who?”
She peeked at Sam from beneath half-lidded eyes. “You could go as Deven Masters.”
“Oh. So you liked that movie, huh?” Sam smirked. Earlier, when looking for a movie to watch, she had discovered that Riley knew who Colleen Bryce was, but she had never seen one of her Deven Masters movies. Sam had chosen one of her favorites to introduce her to the character but had ended up spending more time watching Riley than the movie.
As impossible as it seemed, Riley’s blush deepened. “What can I say? Who wouldn’t like a take-charge kind of woman who can kick ass? It’s enticing.” Her eyes darkened. “But add a hidden, vulnerable side that needs to be protected,” she locked gazes with Sam, “that’s compelling.”
The intensity of Riley’s gaze drew Sam in. She struggled not to lose herself in the depths of Riley’s emerald green eyes. Sam wrenched her gaze away before she could drown. Whoa. Talk about compelling. She grabbed her water bottle off the table and chugged half its contents. It still took her two tries to get her voice to work. “So you think I should go as Deven Masters?”
“Huh?” Riley shook her head as if breaking free from a trance. She scrubbed her hands over her face and firmly planted her feet on the floor. “Sure. That could work.”
“See. That wasn’t so hard.”
Riley smiled. “So where should we go to get the stuff we need? One of those Halloween superstores?”
“I know just the place,” Sam said. “It’s not your run-of-the-mill Halloween store. This place specializes in quality costumes and props. They’re located in this huge warehouse and furnish costumes and props to the movie industry and TV shows. You have to see this place to believe it.”
“Sounds like fun. When do we go?”
“Store’s an hour drive away, so it would probably be best if we went on your next day off, since you work later than I do.”
Riley rose from the couch. “All right, pardner.” She tipped an imaginary hat. “I’ll be ready. But for now, I need to mosey on to bed. Five a.m. comes early for us cowboys.”