“What?” Seriously?
“You haven’t been seeing each other long, and you haven’t slept together. If the guy doesn’t want you to sleep over, I think he’s entitled to that. Frankly, if a woman said that to a man, no one would blink an eye over it. He would have to respect that and back off. This is a double standard.”
My jaw dropped. “It’s so not a double standard.”
“Sorry, sis. It is.”
“But you don’t think it’s strange he won’t tell me why?”
He shrugged. “Have you told him everything about you?”
“Most of it.”
“I don’t know… I think everyone is entitled to a little privacy. If you guys had been dating six months, I would say otherwise. But right now, I think he’s right. And I think you need to apologize to him for slapping him.”
“He was an ass to me.”
“Yeah, he probably was. But he never raised a hand to you, right?”
I knew he had me.
“Double standard—again.”
I covered my face with my hands because I knew he was right.
“I don’t think you should break up with him. But I think he’s probably going to break up with you.”
My heart fell into the pit of my stomach when the truth seared my blood. Christopher was right, and I knew he was. The situation was bad all around, but I was the one who lost my temper first. We were lying together so peacefully when he suddenly pushed me away. Deep down inside, I knew that was the real reason I was upset. I simply didn’t go about it in the right way.
“At least I’ll have a stud to pick up girls with. The guys from the office are too nerdy.”
“Christopher.” I wasn’t in the mood for his jokes.
“What? If you break up, I can’t be friends with him anymore?”
“You can’t pick up chicks with him.”
“Why?” He finished the rest of his beer and set the empty bottle on the table. “I won’t bring it up to you or anything.”
I rolled my eyes because he didn’t get it.
A knock sounded on the door. It was loud and slow, telling me a man was on the other side.
Christopher’s eyes darted to the doorway. “Wonder who that could be?”
Shit. Calloway must have stopped by on his way home, and he was going to kick me to the curb before he moved on with his life. The end was here, and now I couldn’t swallow it. My body came alive for him in a way it never did for anyone else. Did I ruin the best thing that ever happened to me?
Christopher turned his gaze back to me. “Grow some balls and answer the door.”
I would normally tell him off, but in this case, he was right. I took a deep breath before I turned the knob and opened the door.
Calloway stood on the other side, wearing a black suit with a black tie. Looking like a million bucks, he made the hallway look like a narrow tunnel. His dark hair was messy from running his fingers through it, and his intense eyes held their typical frozen gaze. His thoughts were unreadable, buried under layers of armor.
I knew what was coming. “Hi.”
He didn’t reciprocate the greeting. All he did was make a slight nod of his head.
Christopher cleared his throat then walked past me to get to the door. He moved past Calloway awkwardly and gave him a quick wave before disappearing into the hallway.
Calloway kept his eyes on me like he hadn’t noticed him.
“You wanna come in?”
Calloway walked inside, bringing a shadow with him. He straightened his sleeves out of habit and stood in the middle of my tiny apartment. The place looked even smaller with him in it, like a cage too small for an enormous animal. He glanced around the apartment in a quick scan before he turned back to me.
I shut the door and stood a few feet away from him, suddenly feeling anxious and nervous. His cheek wasn’t red from my palm, but his exterior still held signs of obvious irritation. When he dropped me off last night, he didn’t say goodbye to me. He waited for me to get inside my door before he walked away.
He slid his hands inside his pockets and shifted his weight to one leg, looking like every woman’s fantasy.
I forgot how hot he was.
Now getting dumped would be even worse.
He still didn’t say anything, like he expected me to speak first.
“I know why you’re here. And I think we should just get through this as quickly and painlessly as possible.”
“Painlessly?” His eyebrows arched in a sexy way. No one else could pull that off. “There’s no pleasure without pain.”
“What?” I didn’t understand his meaning, and it seemed like I was supposed to.
He didn’t elaborate.
I wasn’t getting anything more out of him, so I moved forward. “I know you’re here to break things off with me, and that’s fine. I understand you’re upset, and I think you have every right to walk away. But I want you to know that I’m sorry. I’m sorry for slapping you—”
“Don’t ever apologize for that.” Aggression seeped from his throat unexpectedly, hitting me like a bolt of lightning. The look he flashed me was a little terrifying—and a little sexy.
“But it was wrong of me. I don’t even know why I did it…”
“Because you liked it. And you knew I liked it.” He closed the gap between us, getting so close we could kiss. “I’m not here to break up with you. In fact, I’m here to beg you to stay with me.”
“You don’t need to beg.”
“Then I’ll just ask.” His hands moved to my hips where his fingers dug into my sides gently. “I’m sorry I snapped at you. I just have…issues.”
“What kind of issues?”
“Anger issues.”
He hid it so well up until that point.
“Control issues.”
I picked up on that one.
“And I’m never going to change. It’s who I am, and I’ll dull it down whenever we’re together. But sometimes, I’ll slip up. If you’re okay with that, then I’d like to make this work.”
“In your defense, I feel like I provoked you.”
“No.” He brought me closer into his chest. “You asked me a question, and I didn’t give you a good enough answer.”
“I was too hard on you…”
“I like it when you’re hard on me. That’s why I’m so obsessed with you.” He leaned into me and pressed his lips to mine, giving me a kiss so soft I thought his lips were made of rose petals.
When he pulled away, I was a little light-headed. All the anger I had from the night before disappeared. Now, I just wanted him to stay with me forever. I wanted that kiss a million times over, until the sun burned out.
“So I’m sorry and you’re sorry.” He kissed the corner of my mouth. “Now we can move on.”
“Yeah…”
He cupped my cheek before he kissed me again, giving me a more forceful embrace.
I melted under the touch, feeling my entire body get pulled under. I was drowning, but every moment I didn’t have air was the best struggle I’d ever experienced.
He guided me to my small bed in the corner and laid me down, his powerful body covering mine. His hands immediately yanked up my dress before he peeled off his jacket. He wrapped my leg around his waist before he crushed his mouth to mine, bruising my lips with the intensity of his kiss.
Like nothing happened, I hooked my arms around his neck and deepened the kiss, falling under the spell he cast. He had a hold on me that couldn’t be shaken, and it ran so deep in my veins that it hit bone. He possessed me and claimed me as his, and for the first time, I was perfectly fine being claimed by a man.
After we had dinner at his place, I went to the sink and started to scrub the dirty dishes. A habit that I had never shaken, I liked to place all the dirty dishes in the dishwasher before I went to bed. Having a clean kitchen in the morning put my mind at ease. And with a kitchen as nice as his, it needed to be kept clean.
“What are you doing?” He s
hut off the faucet and grabbed the plate from my hand.
“Dishes. You’ve never done it before?” The corner of my lip rose in a smile because I liked being a smartass.
“Many times.” He set the wet plate in the sink. “But you aren’t doing the dishes. I’ll take care of them later.”
“But you always take care of them.”
“Because you’re my guest.” He grabbed both of my wrists and guided me against the kitchen island, making my back press against the counter. He kept his hold securely around my wrists, squeezing them slightly. “Do you understand me?”
“No. I’ll never understand you.” Sometimes, I defied him just to get a rise out of him. His eyes gave me a smoldering look, and he was even sexier that way.
“I guess I’ll have to make you.” He lifted me up and set me on the kitchen island. He wrapped my legs around his waist and pressed his hard-on right against me through his jeans. “In case it wasn’t clear before, my cock is only hard for you—no one else. So don’t ever accuse me otherwise again.” His hand fisted my hair, and he got a good grip on the back of my neck. “Do we understand each other now?”
This time, I obeyed him. “Yes.”
“Good.” He slid his hand under my dress and down my panties in a nanosecond. Large fingers found my clitoris, and he rubbed me aggressively, trying to get me off right in the middle of his kitchen. He looked into my eyes with the same expression of steel and watched me writhe for him. “I love watching your face as you come.”
My hands snaked to his biceps, my anchor, and I held on as he continued to rub me down below. It felt so amazing, like a fire burning white-hot. It scorched every inch of my skin and burned me from the inside out.
He pressed his lips to my ear and held his breath, waiting for just the right moment.
I felt the burn between my legs grow until it reached the breaking point.
“Now come.”
I obeyed his command and felt my body disintegrate as the pleasure ripped me apart violently. Incoherent screams escaped from my throat, and I wasn’t sure what I was saying or what I meant to say. With just his fingers, he turned me into a puddle at his feet. I could only imagine what his big, fat cock would do.
He admired the spent look on my face, the corner of his mouth rising in a triumphant grin. “Hope you aren’t too tired. Because it’s my turn next.”
I’d never wanted cock in my mouth so much in my life. But now it was all I wanted, to feel myself choke on his size until my eyes were wet with tears. “I’m never too tired for that.”
We lay in his large bed, curled up under the sheets. The cold frost pressed against the windows and made us feel as if we were in a winter wonderland. It had snowed the day before, and fresh powder was on the sidewalks.
We didn’t need central heating because I had this large man beside me. Big and powerful, his body kept me warm and protected me from the cold. With him, I didn’t need clothes or shelter. I just needed Calloway.
“Can I ask you something?” I ran my hand up his chest and to his shoulder, feeling all the grooves of individual muscles.
“Yes.”
“When do you work out?” He never mentioned going to the gym, but I knew he must work out. There was no way a man could look like that without serious commitment. If not, then he really was a god.
“Early in the morning before work.”
That would explain why he never mentioned it. “I’ve been meaning to work out…but I’ve been saying that for years now and haven’t actually done anything.” I was too busy and too poor for a gym membership.
“Good thing you never eat,” he teased.
“I eat,” I argued. “Otherwise, I would be dead.”
“But you certainly don’t eat enough.” His hand slid over my flat stomach to my hip. “But I think your body is still sexy.”
“Really? I’m not a fan of my legs.”
“Why?”
“They’re too skinny. They remind me of chicken legs.”
“Do some squats.”
“I’ll pass.” Getting hot and sweaty in a gym wasn’t my thing. I would never have the commitment to put my mind to it. Besides, everyone would stare at me because they would know I didn’t have a clue what I was doing. “I would rather squat on your face.”
His eyes immediately darkened at that comment, turning darker than the underworld. “That sounds like a perfect workout.”
“I agree.”
He pulled me closer then pressed a few kisses to my earlobe. I loved the feel of his heavy breathing amplified in my canal. I could feel his sexual desperation along with his restraint. And when his tongue moved across the sensitive area, it gave me chills.
I wanted to stay in his bed all night long, but I knew the outcome of the evening. Like every other night, I would have to leave. This time, I wouldn’t ask any questions about it. He obviously didn’t want to talk about it, and I wasn’t going to press the conversation. I knew he wasn’t sneaking around behind my back. He wasn’t that kind of person, and I knew he wouldn’t hurt me like that. He must have issues with space—and nothing more. “Can I ask you something?”
“Don’t ask if you can ask. Just ask.” His hand rested in the curve along my waist.
“Have you ever been in love?” Maybe he’d had a serious relationship with someone and it didn’t work out. He slept beside her every night until they had a nasty breakup, and he couldn’t sleep with anyone ever again. I wasn’t trying to be nosy. I really just wanted to know more about the man I was falling for.
“No.” His answer was cold and hard, as if there was no possibility he’d even been close to feeling that way for someone.
“Oh…” Now that my theory was wrong, I didn’t know what to think. “Have you had a serious relationship?” That answer must be no too.
“No.”
Now I didn’t know what to say.
“I was with someone shortly before you came along. But we weren’t in a relationship. We saw each other for a while, but there weren’t feelings there…like what we have.”
“How long?”
He hesitated before he answered. “A year.”
My jaw almost dropped. “You dated her for a year, but you were never serious?”
“Yeah. We were mostly monogamous fuck buddies.” There was no remorse on his face for what he was saying. And he didn’t seem to care about my opinion about it.
“Is that because you haven’t found the right person yet?” Calloway was handsome, wealthy, and compassionate. He could have whoever he wanted, and it shouldn’t be surprising that he was so emotionally unattached. He could do anything he wanted and get away with it.
“Possibly. But honestly, I’ve never been looking for something serious. Marriage and stuff like that aren’t really on my mind.” He watched my expression, seeing my eyes dart back and forth in stress. “I know that’s not something you want to hear, but I don’t want to lie to you.”
“So that means this has an expiration date?”
He closed his mouth like he wasn’t going to answer. “No, not necessarily. The idea of losing you terrifies me. I don’t want to wake up in the morning without knowing you’re mine. I know it’s soon, and we haven’t been dating long, but…I feel differently with you.”
All my anxiety disappeared when he said those words. “I feel differently with you too.”
“My past has nothing to do with us, so I’d rather not compare us to it.” His hand tightened on my lower back, keeping me in place. “All I know is, I want to be with you—and just you.”
My heart warned me I was getting into something dangerous. Calloway was a loose cannon and didn’t have the kind of track record I looked for in a man. I would’ve rather known he used to be in a serious relationship and was looking for marriage and kids…but that wasn’t the case. But I knew I couldn’t walk away from him, not when I felt this strongly about him. My heart beat wildly in my chest anytime he was near, and I grew weak in the knees every time he kissed
me. I’d been searching my whole life for someone like him, a partner who helped the less fortunate. I’d been looking for a man who didn’t give up when times grew rough. I’d been looking for a man who could give me that beautiful feeling of bliss whenever he kissed me. For all those reasons, I didn’t want to walk away.
I never wanted to walk away.
Christopher walked beside me in the park, sipping his coffee. We both just got off work and decided to meet up for an early dinner. Now, we were walking off the calories we consumed because we stuffed our guts with too much Indian food.
Fall in Central Park was beautiful because the leaves changed to red and gold. Winter was a blank sheet of white. The leaves on the trees were caked in the powder, and the pond was frozen over with ice that was inches thick. But in either case, the backdrop was still beautiful.
“Dude, I hate work right now.” His long gray coat stopped at his knees and kept his large body warm. “It never ends. Just when I think I’m caught up, I walk in the next morning and it’s a nightmare all over again.”
“Yeah, but you love it.”
“No. I need to find a sugar mama. You know, a hot little number that makes bank. I could stay home all day and play video games, and when she gets home, she could ride my dick and bring me a present.”
I rolled my eyes. “You would never do that.”
“Hell yeah, I would. If I met a doctor or lawyer or something.”
“You would get bored.”
He shook his head. “You don’t know me very well. Besides, we’d have kids, so I’d take care of them.”
“And when they’re at school all day?”
He shrugged. “I’ll shop on Amazon.”
That time, I actually chuckled.
He sipped his coffee and stuffed his free hand in his pocket to keep warm. “So how’s it going with Mr. Dreamy?”
“Don’t call him that.”
“What? He is.”
“Maybe he can be your sugar mama since you like him so much.”
He was about to reject the idea when he shrugged instead. “That wouldn’t be the worst idea. We both like the Knicks, and he’s pretty laid-back.”
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