by Liz Bankes
Me and Spencer are a team and it is awful. We only get bits of cheese because of him. Obviously that’s what happens when I’m on a team with Matthew too, but Mia’s family wouldn’t care if I thought Beirut was a sort of vegetable or if I got some centuries mixed up. And some of the questions that the other teams get – like the name of Charles II’s most famous girlfriend – I definitely do know. But when I say I knew it was Nell Gwyn, no one looks like they believe me. I have a book of royal scandals that Granny gave me and hers was one of my favourite stories. She was just someone who sold oranges (and maybe did a bit of prostituting) and she ended up going out with the King. Maybe if I get a box of apples and stand outside Buckingham Palace I could end up going out with Prince Harry.
Sam (girl) says that they don’t teach dates in history lessons in schools any more and shakes her head, which is quite annoying as she can’t have left school that long ago.
‘History is just one damn thing after another,’ says Spencer and he gives me a friendly shoulder bump. I want to hug him for rescuing me, but he undoes it when a question about Greek gods comes up and he says, ‘You should know this – aren’t you Greek?’
Sam (boy) pipes up, ‘Oh! I thought you looked a bit . . . you know.’ And he points to my face.
‘Foreign?’ Ajay grins and then Sam goes bright red.
‘Oh, no, no I didn’t . . .’
But Ajay slaps him on the back and tells him he was joking. It is a bit like when Dad first met Nish and asked her where she was from. Nish told him she lived down the road and Dad said, ‘Oh no, I meant where are you from originally?’
Nish said, ‘Luton.’
‘So you’re Greek?’ says Sam (girl). ‘It’s such a fascinating place. I’ve always thought Ancient Greece was a culture dominated by a prevalence of dichotomies.’
I stare at her for a moment. I’m sure some of those words aren’t even real. ‘My granny’s Greek,’ I say. ‘So I’m only a bit. The only things I know about it are from watching Mamma Mia.’
She gives me a pitying look. I probably know a bit more than that, but I want her to stop asking me history questions. And to shut up.
‘I think,’ says Spencer, ‘what would be really interesting is a game of I Have Never. I’ll go first. I have never fallen down the gap between the platform and the train.’
He grins at me. I smile at him, do a little salute and take my drink.
The whole room lurches.
This is much more fun, especially as Sam (girl) is much more open than Sam (boy) about their relationship and keeps embarrassing him. I probably let on a bit too much about myself.
I catch Spencer’s eye a few times. He drinks for quite a few things. It’s weird not knowing someone’s past. Around his friends Spencer seems like he just spends all his time partying. You wouldn’t know he took anything seriously.
And they keep talking about his ‘moves’ and all the girls he’s got with. He laughs along with most of it, but a couple of times I see his eyes flick over to me, like he’s checking for my reaction. I throw myself into the game and just laugh at the things they say about Spencer as well. But underneath it all I wonder.
I suppose at uni it’s not really a big deal, which is weird because at home whether a couple is going to do it is something that gets talked about for ages and planned and you have to go through the whole mission of finding a bed, or bush (Nish), to do it in.
The funniest bit of the game is the way Ajay and Ravi rinse each other because they each have so much dirt on each other. ‘I have never,’ says Ajay, looking right at Ravi with a gleam in his eye, ‘farted in front of the whole school while playing recorder and then run out of assembly crying.’
Ravi narrows his eyes and glares at Ajay as he drinks.
‘I have never been engaged,’ he says.
Ajay takes a swig. ‘Man, that’s a low blow,’ he says, laughing but sounding a bit annoyed.
And then everyone looks at me. Because I just drank.
I was trying to pack for New Zealand. It wasn’t going very well because Mia kept taking stuff out of my suitcase and saying things like, ‘You can’t take that much make-up,’ and ‘Where on the bus are you planning to plug your hair straighteners in?’
It was her fault I was going on this holiday of danger and most likely death. I had been planning to make a will but Mia said I would probably have to go somewhere and sign things, rather than just fill in something on the internet like I thought, so in the end I couldn’t be bothered. I sent Max a text saying that when I died I was leaving everything to him and I put GABI MORGAN at the end so it would be a bit like a signature. I told Mia she was my witness and she agreed. Well, she said, ‘Hurry up and pack!’ but she did nod a bit while she said it.
Then my sister, who had been listening outside, put her head round the door and asked if she could have my clothes because Max wouldn’t need them. So I said, ‘You haven’t seen him on Thursday nights,’ and she ran off saying she was going to be sick. Max does look surprisingly good in a bikini.
Eventually I bunged all my stuff into a backpack (and sneaked my make-up back in when Mia was on the loo – and my heels) and we were ready. Jamie was going to give us a lift to the airport in his fancy car and he phoned to say he would be round in half an hour. I made Mia put him on speakerphone so I could ask him if he was excited about the playlist I’d made for the journey entitled It’s Gabi, Bitch. He said, ‘No,’ so I told him that would only make me sing louder.
There was a tap on the door and Max’s head appeared.
‘MAXIE!’ I was about to leap on him, but he interrupted me.
‘Um, can I speak to Mia for a moment?’
I eyed him suspiciously. ‘Okay, as long as you’re not having a steamy affair.’ I think I saw Mia try not to laugh. So I went out of the room and left them alone. Obviously I listened at the door. Max was giving Mia something for me to open on Christmas Day. I smiled to myself at the thought of the stocking I’d given his mum earlier.
I went back into the room to give Max his goodbye kiss, but it went on a little longer than I planned and Mia went and waited downstairs because she felt uncomfortable.
On Christmas Day we were with my cousin in Auckland, enjoying a hot tub. We Skyped our families and then I did Skype stocking opening with Max. I told Mia she could be there too if she wanted, but she said we might do something gross. When she’d gone into another room I realised she’d left a wrapped up shoebox next to me.
When Max appeared on the screen I held the box up.
‘Oh my God, you got me some shoes!’
He froze.
‘Max?’ Then I realised it was the screen that had frozen and he was talking.
‘Errr . . . just wait.’
He started moving again and he opened his presents first. I got him a Jay-Z album, a PlayStation game and a hat to replace the one that got ruined in Paris.
‘Thank you, baby!’ He leant over and kissed the camera.
‘I’m sorry it wasn’t the same as your old hat – they’d sold out!’ They hadn’t – this hat was just much nicer.
‘Your turn,’ he said. He looked really nervous.
I tore open the wrapping paper and lifted the lid. Inside was a load of shredded tissue paper. And a stone.
‘Um, thanks?’
‘No! That was just to make it heavy.’
I’d thought Mia looked a bit grumpy dragging her rucksack around.
‘Oh!’ I chucked the stone away and started digging around in the tissue paper. And found a little red box.
I looked up at the screen and Max was holding up a piece of paper.
MARRY ME?
Chapter 20
‘Joking! Obvs,’ I say. They look at me like I’m a bit weird. Spencer is peering at me like he’s trying to tell if I really am joking. ‘Unless you count the drunk man who proposed to me outside Tesco,’ I say quickly. ‘But he did say I was a beautiful lad. And he’d wet himself.’
Everyone laughs and tu
rns to Sam (boy) for the next one. Spencer keeps looking at me for a second longer than the others.
I’m having trouble focusing and feeling like I might fall over, even though I’m sitting down. I also want to move on from the engagement moment quickly so I turn to Spencer and I politely ask him to remind me where the bathroom is. Well, that’s what I say in my head. It comes out of my mouth as, ‘Can you take me for a wee?’
I don’t think I really appreciated last time that their bathroom is absolutely massive. I wait until I hear Spencer get to the bottom of the stairs and go back into the living room. Then I sit on the loo, get my phone out and call Mia.
It is quite lucky that I do actually call her and not someone random because I am sort of just jabbing my phone with my hand.
While I’m dialling, a message from Nish comes through. I see it has the word tomorrow in it, but that’s all I catch before I accidentally delete it.
‘Hello?’ Mia says in a little far away voice. Like a tiny mouse. Then she says it again because I haven’t actually answered.
‘Heyyy,’ I say.
‘You’re drunk,’ she replies immediately.
‘You sound crackly!’ I’m whispering and holding my hand over my mouth, even though I’m sure they won’t hear me from down in the living room.
‘I’m in France . . .Where are you? Oh, Jamie says hi.’
‘Tell Jamie I hate him. He’s stolen you off. Away. I want you back.’
There is some rustling and then Jamie’s voice.
‘She’s yours for a tenner – I’ve been looking to trade her in.’
Then I hear an ‘Oi’ and a scuffle and Mia’s back on. ‘So where are you?’
‘Just at Spencer’s.’ I’m trying to sound casual but my throat is too tight.
‘Is that the guy who had the party?’ she says. ‘The others told me about him.’
‘What did they say?’ I’ve stopped whispering, but my voice is still coming out higher than I mean it to.
‘That he kissed you and it freaked you out. Gabi, what’s wrong?’
‘Wrong? Nothing! How are you?’ I swallow.
There’s a pause and some shuffling. It sounds like she’s moving to another room.
‘Gabi,’ she says firmly. ‘What would you be saying if this was me?’
‘Come to my bosom and tell me everything,’ I mumble.
‘Exactly,’ she says. ‘So, you know . . . do that.’
Mia doesn’t like naming body parts.
So I tell her. About the kiss and how I can’t get it out of my mind. About all the things his friends were saying about him just now. How I look at him and have no idea what he’s thinking, but I get a thrill every time I find out something new about him. How exciting it is being at the point where everything is a possibility. And how scary. And how the idea of trusting someone fills me with panic. Mia just listens and lets me speak.
‘I don’t understand how it’s happened.’ I catch my breath. ‘I got scared and I’m drunk and now I’ve run away to hide in this massive bathroom.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘Well, it’s just massive. You could just run round and round the room to dry yourself instead of using a towel.’
‘No – what do you mean you don’t understand how it happened?’ she says.
‘I think I like him.’
‘It’s okay to like him,’ Mia says softly.
I pause. ‘No it’s not! I only just broke up with Max. People will think I’m heartless.’
‘Anyone that matters knows you’re not heartless, Gabi. If someone thinks otherwise they’re a moron.’
‘You won’t tell anyone, will you?’
‘Well, this is awkward, because I’ve been live tweeting our conversation.’
‘Oh Mia, even in France you’re still a knob.’
‘’Fraid so.’
‘But you’re my knob.’
‘Um, thanks. Do you think you will tell him you like him?’
‘No. He might not even feel the same. And if he does then he shouldn’t get involved with me anyway. I’m mad and all over the place and shouldn’t be allowed near people.’
‘You are quite mad, but you’re also amazing and I have the highest standards in the world for anyone that goes near you. He would be lucky to be involved with you.’
‘I love it when you’re soppy, Mia.’
‘Shut up.’
I smile and then lean my head against the toilet roll holder and neither of us says anything for a while. It’s one of those comfortable silences that you can have with your best friend. I close my eyes.
‘Gabi?’ GABI?’ Mia’s voice is barking at me. ‘Have you fallen asleep?’
‘Sorry! A bit.’ My eyes snap back open.
‘You should probably go back downstairs now. You’ve been on the phone to me for about half an hour. They’ll think you’re being sick.’
I stride back into the room and say, ‘I wasn’t being sick.’
They all look up at me. Now they think I definitely was.
Spencer stands up, all three of him, in fact. He looks concerned, I think.
‘Shall we take you to bed?’
The time it did happen with Max probably sounds cooler than it was. It was in a car at a house party. But the car was his older brother, Cal’s, and the party was Cal’s friend’s, so we didn’t really know anyone there. Mia and some of the other girls from school were huddled in a corner mostly saying, ‘What?’ and repeating themselves a lot because the music was so loud. Mia was actually hoping to get with this guy Kieran (who I now call Kieran the Dick) but I didn’t know that at the time because Mia is all sneaky and secretive with stuff like that. I beat it out of her in the end. Not literally. Well, a bit literally.
They weren’t being very partyish so I dragged Max round to mingle but that backfired because he started talking to some guy about football and then didn’t seem to notice all the yawning and eye-rolling I was doing. Eventually I said, ‘Max! I think someone is starting a beat-boxing competition!’ and he went, ‘Ooh, where?’ and I took him off to the kitchen.
I went behind Max and threaded my arms under his and squeezed him. I was in one of those moods where my heart just buzzed with how much I loved him.
‘Let’s get drinks!’ I said, while Max was looking round for people beat-boxing.
It was a huge kitchen, which blatantly contained everything you could ever need, so we set about finding the ingredients for Jaegerbombs.
‘One, two, three – down!’ said Max.
I was busy doing my disgusted-shots face before I realised Max was looking at something.
‘What?’ I turned round.
‘Those are Cal’s car keys.’
I turned back. The question was there in his eyes.
Outside was chilly and we both had our arms crossed to try to stop the shivering. We hadn’t stopped to get coats. Looking back at the house we could see the silhouettes of people through the curtains. We didn’t think anyone had seen us leave. Both our heads turned in panic to the house again when Max pressed the button to unlock the car, causing a loud beep and the headlights to light up, but nothing changed.
Then once we’d slid onto the back seat, Max decided to try to put the front seats down to make it more like a bed. He pushed the one on the driver’s side too forcefully and the headrest smacked against the horn. We both squealed – him more high-pitched than me, I think – and then we were silent. But again the house didn’t react.
The seats were freezing and at first our kissing was disrupted by frequent shivering. I moved on top of him and he hugged me close. I went in for a long, slow kiss and slid my hand over his chest and down. He moaned slightly as a felt him straining against his jeans. He shifted over and then we awkwardly repositioned ourselves so I was lying back on the seat and he was lying on his side on the front seats.
‘Clothes off ?’ he said.
‘Can we keep top halves on?’ I asked.
‘Won’t that look we
ird?’
‘Only if you go back into the house like that.’
He flung his jeans away in an impression of a stripper before realising that the condom was in his pocket. Then I couldn’t stop laughing at his bum in the air as he scrambled around to pick them up again.
Then he was on top of me. Our bare legs together. He moved a strand of hair away from my face.
‘I love you.’
I smiled at him. ‘I know. Get on with it.’
When it actually happened it was like everything went quiet. There was nothing except the sound of our breathing – and whispering because he was worried about hurting me and I was telling him it was okay. I can’t remember exactly what we said. It is all a blur. But a happy blur. With Max I felt completely safe.
Afterwards we lay there hugging for a while, but we knew we couldn’t be long. Cal was supposed to be giving us all a lift home and they would be wondering where we were.
We found out that actually they weren’t. We’d been seen going towards the car and that word had got round to everyone except Mia, who had left her lip gloss in the car and had come out to get it. A minute later, she’d run back into the house shouting, ‘MY EYES!’
Chapter 21
I’m sitting on Spencer’s bed. He left me to get changed into a T-shirt.
I could tell him how I feel – that I like him. It could start something. Something that would take over and throw us together and send us on an adventure.
Something beyond my control.
He puts his head round the door and holds up a toothbrush. ‘Spare,’ he says.
‘Do you keep one handy for all the girls you bring back here?’ I shoot back. It comes out more angry than I meant it to.
‘What’s it to you? I’m just your tour guide,’ he says. He says it in a jokey way, but there’s an edge to his voice.
‘Who said I cared?’ I look up at him defiantly.
He frowns. The room suddenly feels tense and awkward. But there’s no going back now. He sits down next to me on the bed. ‘I see what’s happened here.’ His voice is low and serious. ‘You lurve me,’ he says.