Joelle smiled, and Rebecca smiled warmly back at her. Joelle started laughing, as she hugged Rebecca, and Rebecca joined in, well aware the family was looking on at them with shock and surprise. It was obvious to them that this was not her usual, obligatory hug. It was real and sincere. But most of all, it was fun.
All the while, Nick kept looking at her oddly.
Joelle gave her hand a squeeze and said, “We should talk later.”
Finally, Trina came in, dragging her husband, Gavin, behind her.
“God, he’s so slow,” Trina said as her way of greeting Rebecca who was holding open the front door. Trina rolled her eyes at her husband, now ten paces behind, carrying their daughter, Jenny, the diaper bag, and Karlee’s present. Rebecca held her tongue. Trina could be a real handful: impatient, unkind, frustrating, and always demanding. But Gavin just fueled all of that by never standing up to her or her inexhaustible demands, and trying always to please the unpleasable.
The party was crowded and happy as they moved out onto her back deck, since it was so warm and pleasant. Conversations revolved around gossip and who was doing what. Nothing out of the ordinary and certainly nothing beyond the usual family get-together.
There was no mention of Doug, or Rebecca’s ambition for writing. Of course, nothing like that, which would have inevitably made everyone uncomfortable.
Rebecca looked up when she heard the sudden squeal from Karlee. “Wob!” she yelled, her tiara flying off as she sprinted across the lawn. Rob was coming around the side of the house.
Rebecca was in the process of refilling someone’s lemonade when she spotted Rob. Karlee flew with complete abandon towards him, and Rebecca set the pitcher carefully down on the table. Her stomach was already flipping with nerves and her heart swelled with joy.
Holy shit, she wasn’t just glad he was here. It felt… well, like she could finally relax and enjoy the party because he was here. He came, and now she could really have some fun. The knowledge of that surprised her, and even flabbergasted her. She wanted Rob to be there with her. As a couple. The answer she couldn’t find last Saturday was simply right in front of her now. She wanted to be with Rob.
After a week of not seeing him, she not only missed him, but truly longed for him. She now felt at ease. Calm, even. But never more excited to see him. She was, it seemed, ready to have a new boyfriend.
There were other eyes that followed Karlee, and Rebecca knew Rob would hate that. The family. They were all watching him, and judging him. But still, he came, for her, and for Karlee. Despite how awkward, stupid, cold, and unsatisfying they left things previously, he still came.
Kathy soon followed Karlee, although she did not launch herself with the same unbridled abandon at Rob, but smiled shyly as she waved at him, standing next to his feet. Rob smiled at Kathy and said something into her ear. He had a way with Kathy that made her come out of her introverted shell, and feel special, like she belonged. Rebecca, all at once, was startled to realize how much that meant to her, and to her girls. Possibly, even, for all of their futures.
Rob had on jeans, and a dark red shirt with another shirt underneath. It had white sleeves that covered his arms. His hair was combed and he shaved. He looked so good to her, a rush of adrenaline nearly stopped her heart. He must have purposely worn long sleeves to hide his tattoos. For her? Or so he would not offend her mother? It was much too warm a day to wear long sleeves. She didn’t know how she felt, but there was no denying how different he looked from the men in her family. How did she feel about that? Embarrassed? She wasn’t sure. She only knew he looked really good to her.
“Rebecca,” her mother hissed. “What is he doing here?”
“Karlee invited him. And so did I,” she said, after absorbing her mother’s glare.
“How could you encourage him with the girls? How could you bring him here?”
“Because they like him and I like him,” Rebecca said simply. Karlee was in Rob’s arms after begging him to pick her up. Rob finally looked around, his eyes seeking hers, and taking refuge when he found them. She smiled at him.
She met him at the edge of her large deck, but he didn’t smile. He looked grim. Nervous. She felt sorry that she didn’t make sure what he was to her before they found themselves in the spotlight in front of her family.
“Hi Rebecca.” His gaze slid over her. Did he like what he saw? To him, and the people of his crowd, she didn’t fit in, just as he didn’t in hers. They were an odd pair, yet looking into his eyes, everything made sense. And to her heart, they made more sense than anything else in her life.
“I’m so glad you came, Rob.”
He looked past her. “Don’t think your family would agree with you.”
“Come on. Most of them don’t even know you.” She put her hand on his forearm, and he looked down, surprised at the contact. He was still holding Karlee, who had her hands securely wrapped around his neck.
Her two brother-in-laws didn’t have a clue who Rob was, or what he was to her, so they said hello and seemed quite civilized and polite to Rob. They looked at her a little strangely, however, like they were wondering where Doug was, and what this new guy meant to Rebecca. Nonetheless, they were courteous and polite. The crowds of kids came and went. Some said hello to Rob, while others just played around the yard. Hers, however, were trailing Rob. What did that say?
Joelle came walking out of the house before she stopped dead in her tracks. Rob stopped too, but finally nodded at her with his mouth tight. Nick was right behind Joelle and he also stopped, his face contorted with displeasure. Trina was suddenly standing before them and she didn’t look happy with Rebecca. Rebecca cringed. Trina didn’t like being kept out of the loop.
“Hey Rob,” Joelle said in a cheerful voice. “How’s it going?”
Trina glanced from Joelle to Rob, then to Nick, and then back to Joelle. Joelle sounded far friendlier to her ex-husband than she usually did to any of the Lassiters except Nick. Then again, when did Rebecca’s family do anything to make Joelle feel welcome, or try to change their standoffish ways with her?
“This your daughter?” Rob asked, looking at the little two-year-old sucking her thumb and holding Joelle’s hand.
“Yes, this is Jody.”
“She’s adorable. She looks just like you,” Rob said, looking at Jody a second longer than he probably would stare at any other child. Rebecca caught the undercurrent, of course, and the chance, once long ago, when they could have shared a child. Rebecca was, once again, stricken by how awkward this all was. How weird and strange. And yet, Rob was here because of her. She knew that. She knew that right down to her toes. He liked her, a lot, and didn’t know what to make of it, or how to act. But he wasn’t able to stay away from her, which he could have. He could have said no a thousand times, and refused to go to a family birthday party for her daughter. He could have showed up at ten o’clock at night like he did with his mysterious “friend” and probably get what he wanted. But he didn’t do that either. She was pretty sure Rob didn’t want to do that. He wanted to be there, just as much as he hated being there.
Rob’s gaze went to Nick, who scowled. He put his hand on Joelle’s back and gently pushed her forward so she’d walk past Rob.
Trina’s eyes suddenly bulged. “Oh my God, you’re that Rob. Joelle’s Rob.” Her voice was loud and shrill at her discovery. Rebecca wanted to groan. Her sister could never be subtle.
“I’m not anybody’s Rob,” he said casually before Rebecca could shush and silence her sister. He smiled at her charmingly. “You must be Trina. Heard a lot about you.”
Trina blew her cheeks out and frowned. She didn’t know quite what Rob meant. Rebecca had to put a hand to mouth to hide her smile at Rob’s ambiguous comment.
“What is he doing here?” Trina hissed to Rebecca, much as their mother did. Her eyes went from Rebecca to Rob. “Rebecca, oh my God, are you...?
Rebecca shook her head. No way would she discuss her private sex life right there in middl
e of a family party. “Trina, couldn’t you just say hello?”
“Hello to Joelle’s ex-husband? Why?” Trina asked, still staring, almost open-mouthed.
Rebecca grabbed Rob’s hand and pulled him past her awful sister. Lately, nothing could make Trina happy. Her moods were becoming more sour towards everyone, in general. Finally, Rebecca decided she had to dodge her family members who were so blatantly staring at them, wondering what Rob was doing here.
She dragged him into the laundry room off the kitchen, away from the crowd just to have a second of peace. She stopped, and turned, finally bringing Rob close to her, and putting her arms around his neck, before she went on her tiptoes and kissed him. His bewilderment was evident when he jerked back. Then his lips came down on hers and his arms came around her, as his middle pressed into her stomach. She sighed at the now familiar feel of him and leaned back, looking up at him.
“So, were you going to call me?”
He scowled at her. “I was getting around to it.”
“Why did it take you so long?”
“Because I didn’t know what to say about last weekend. I had no clue what you thought. We didn’t exactly have any clear communication about it.”
“No, we didn’t. But it’s all I’ve thought about all week. Did you?”
He looked into her eyes, and his mouth seemed tight. She thought he was considering not answering her.
“Yeah, I thought about it a time or two.”
“How? As in, you screwed Nick’s sister, ha-ha? Or the other way, that you feel something too?”
“I told you before that you don’t have anything to do with how I feel about your brother.”
“So you feel something too?”
He hesitated and she could see he was struggling to be honest. He didn’t want to have this conversation. “Yeah, okay, I feel it.”
“Then why did you almost try to stop it? Was it what my brother said that night?”
“No. It’s that I don’t get what we’re doing together. We don’t match. But then, we do. I don’t get it.”
“I’m confused too, you know, but I missed you this week. And I couldn’t wait for you to get here today. I was almost pacing with anticipation.”
He considered her and his incredulity widened his eyes. Why? Because she was being honest and forthright about what happened? Perhaps that was the thing: she was always honest with him. And that’s what made him so different for her than anyone else.
“I’m glad to see you too.”
She smiled. “Good. It didn’t even kill you to say it to me.”
“Why did you invite me here? With your entire family? You saw your mom’s face, Trina’s, Nick’s, why do this?”
“Why did you come?
“Because you asked.”
She shrugged. Why indeed? She could quietly see Rob on the side; and secretly sleep with him, and no one would be the wiser. And Rob would let her slink around to be with him. But she was sure, Rob wouldn’t feel compelled to commit himself to her. She would become relegated to just being his “friend.” No way could that become her role.
“You know, I haven’t slept with any one since Doug. You knew already, not only from that, but also because together means a big deal to me. And I want it to be. I want them to know. So what? I’m not hiding it. There. That’s why. I’m not hiding it from you, or them, or Nick. But mostly, I want you to know that I want them to know.”
She could see his eyes filling with total apprehension. He never expected her to be so decided, and forthright, so out there. Neither did she. But seeing him walking up to the party, sparked an epiphany, and the clarity of how she felt towards him suddenly became very real and sharp. She was so glad to see him, it felt like everything would be okay when he walked up. After years of feeling lost, alone, and disconnected, even in a crowd, Rob’s arrival made her feel complete, and part of something bigger. And better. Rob made everything feel better.
“Aren’t you hot in this?” she finally asked, tugging at his long sleeves.
He shrugged. “Seemed like not deliberately antagonizing your mother anymore than she already is might be a good idea.”
“And Nick? My siblings? Take it off. It’s too hot to wear today.”
He regarded her. “You don’t really want me exposing my tattoos right under your mother’s nose.”
“Rob, I get how different we look from each other. And to other people. But if we can’t be ourselves, even with each other, then this is going nowhere. I can’t hide my three kids, any more than you can hide your tattoos. They are a fact, and a part of us. So yes, I want you to be comfortable. And it’s too hot for long sleeves.”
He stared at her before finally lifting off both shirts, at once, and separating the long and short-sleeved. She watched simply because she was unable to resist. In the light of her laundry room, his chest was sculpted, tapering down to his waist, with a long ridge of six-pack abs, and strong shoulders and sinewy biceps. The ink and colors of his arms stopped just at his shoulders. His skin was dark, tanned, and swarthy. He was so hot, she felt her own temperature rise a few degrees. Then he pulled the t-shirt down, and covered the sight of his perfect chest.
She glanced up at him and found he was looking at her. “There. Is this what you want your mother to see? I don’t suppose trotting out your bad-ass lover, will win too many points with Mom? Or was that your intention?”
She sighed and put her hands on his arms. “Boyfriend, Rob. My bad-ass, tattooed boyfriend. And no, it’s not going to win me any points.”
“Your what?”
“Boyfriend. What did you think? I was going to have you here in front of my kids, and my family as my, well, what would you be other than my boyfriend?”
“Rebecca, I don’t know…”
“Well, what other word is there to call us? Look me in the eye now and say what I am, if you intend to tell me I am not your girlfriend.”
His lips compressed. “You know how to push a guy into a corner, don’t you?”
She smiled. “I do, especially when he deserves it. You didn’t call me all week.”
“I caught that the first time you complained about it. So I should call next time?”
She nodded. “How long has it been since you’ve had a real girlfriend?”
He shook his head. “Oh God, Rebecca, if I answer that, then we’re right back to where we always end up.”
“Nick and Joelle.”
“Yeah.”
“No, we’re not. We’re right here. You and I. Rob and Rebecca. Please tell me you see that too.”
He shut his eyes, but finally shook his head. “I see that. Us. That’s why I didn’t call you all week.”
“I would have thought that would have given you a reason why you should.”
“Look, I didn’t intend to end up with a married woman, with three impressionable, young kids. So yeah, it’s a good reason for me to avoid you. It’s a reason I would try to stay out of here.”
“I see. But you’re here now.”
“Yeah. I’m here,” he said as his lips descended onto hers.
Rebecca found herself looking at Nick as he came around the laundry room corner. He stopped dead when he took in Rob leaning against the washing machine, and Rebecca in his arms. They appeared very close, talking right into each other’s faces. Intimate, even. Rebecca casually took a step back and dropped her hands as Rob let her go. All the while, Nick glared at her, and then at Rob.
Rob straightened his posture, and Nick paled right before her eyes. Rebecca felt bad, knowing how much this, and she, upset her brother. But she knew she couldn’t help it either.
“Mom said she needs more plastic plates,” Nick finally said in a wooden voice to her.
“Oh, sure. I’ll grab them. Uh, Nick, would you mind not looking like you’re going to kill Rob? Because I have to get lunch on now and I can’t stay here to referee you two.”
Nick bristled and Rob shuffled his feet. “Please, guys. This is my daughter’
s birthday. She wants, no, I want you both here. That’s just the way it is, and what you both have to live with.”
Nick finally took a step back, shaking his head in disbelief. “Are you sure you know what you’re doing here, Rebecca?”
“I do, Nick. You’ve always trusted me. Why would you stop now?”
“I know what Rob’s capable of, so don’t forget that. I just don’t want to see you hurt.”
“Hurt? Me?” she said in a strange voice. She looked at Rob, then Nick, and shook her head. “You really don’t get it, do you? I’ve been hurt for two years! Finally, now, for the last few weeks, I haven’t been. Get that, both of you! Doug, my husband, nearly destroyed me; and Rob’s putting some of me back together.”
Rob’s entire expression changed to disbelief, nearly mirroring Nick’s.
Nick sighed. “It’s just…”
“What?”
“I never said anything about Doug. Even when I should have. So this time…”
“You still don’t get to comment. I love you, you know that. I never intended to hurt you or Joelle. You’re just going to have to trust me. And you must admit, that you like me and Joelle finally being friends, don’t you?”
“You could have given her a chance four years ago.”
Rebecca nodded. “I made a mistake with Joelle. Now I’m asking you not to do the same thing to me with Rob.”
Nick sighed, long and deep. “God damn, why didn’t you just become a lawyer? You can argue in and around anything, and still get your way.”
Rebecca smiled. Both men scowled at her and then at each other. She shook her head and passed through them. For now, she couldn’t hide any longer, she had a party to hostess.
****
Rob was left alone with Nick, who was still scowling at him.
“I take it you’re sleeping with my sister now? What happened to not taking advantage of her?”
“Have you noticed your sister? Tell me exactly how I’ve taken advantage of her? If anything, it’s the other way around. Look, I think this is just as bad of an idea as you do. Believe me, I do. But she thinks… well, fuck, I don’t know what she thinks is advantageous about me being here.”
Zenith Fulfilled (Zenith Trilogy, #3) Page 19