She felt so wet and tight around him, he groaned at her explosive flammability.
Suddenly paralyzed, he realized with a great effort, which seemed super-human, that he wasn’t wearing a condom.
“I don’t have anything on,” he said, barely able to breathe, let alone, talk.
“It’s okay. I can’t have kids.”
“You have three,” he argued. Her logic was almost beyond him.
“I had my tubes tied after Karlee.” She was already moving her hips again and he slid in and out of her, without any movement from him. He stilled her hips and ground his teeth to avoid pushing into her as high and as hard as he could.
“I always use condoms.”
“Good.” She moved and pulled him as far and deep as he could get. He groaned at the exhilarating feel of her again; she was perfect. She kept moving, all hot and wild, until he finally sat up, and held her against him, kissing her as her arms encircled his neck. Passionate, thought-consuming, and fast. He came inside her as deep and hot as he could ever remember. He felt her stiffening, and her body tightened around him.
He leaned back and she came with him, staying on top of his chest. Her hair was below his chin, and when he blew on it, some of the strands clung to his lips. Her body felt slick and warm over his.
“What was that?” he finally asked when he found his voice.
“I wasn’t hung over this time.”
“Last time you were hung over? Are you always like this?”
“Like what?”
“Hot. Hotter than any groupie I could ever imagine. Where does all that come from?”
“You think I’m hot?”
“So hot, you nearly killed me.”
She laughed, a glad, happy laugh. A pleased with herself laugh. “I never knew I was particularly good at it.”
“At sex? Well, you are, you’re very good at it.”
“Worth the long drive back good?”
“Worth walking back here good.”
“So you’re not mad at me anymore?”
“I was never mad at you,” he said, his hand on her back now, gently rubbing. “I was trying to get you to see how impossible you and I are together. I don’t fit into your life, nor do you into mine. And it will only cause more trouble for you with your family and friends.”
She stretched, her chest moving over his, and her breasts smashing into him. Her hair trailed over him and he felt almost ready to go again. He loved touching her. Like nothing he could remember. She was soft, silky, and wet where she should be.
“You were mad because my brother was mad you were talking to Joelle. You were sick of my family staring at you, so you stormed off.”
“Is that what you think?”
“That’s what I know. Don’t leave me like that again. You owe me better than that.”
“Do I, Rebecca? Why do I owe you anything?”
Her shoulders shrugged. “That’s the funny part, I don’t know why you do, or when it happened, but it did, so you do.”
He paused to digest the big statement, but didn’t know what to say.
“Look, I wasn’t really at Spencer’s when you called tonight.”
She suddenly sat up and stared down at him. “What do you mean? You lied to me?”
He sat up too, surprised at the quickness of her response, as well as the tone of her voice. “Well, yeah, I guess I did. I didn’t think it was your business. I was pissed off at you, and almost didn’t answer.”
“Where were you?”
“I think you know the answer to that.”
“What’s her name? This friend of yours?”
“Bethany.”
“Did you have sex with her tonight?”
He leaned back against the headboard and looked up at the ceiling. “If I did, how is that any of your business?”
Her arms folded over her chest, pushing her boobs up, and drawing his gaze. He tried not to look, or think of what he’d like to do to them while she was pissed off, but it failed.
“You know why it’s my business. You want me to say it, Rob?”
She was challenging him, and looking him in the eye. He looked away. No, he wasn’t ready to hear anything about why it was her business. “I didn’t sleep with her. I broke it off. You know, told her, I wouldn’t be going there anymore.”
She let out a breath. “Why do you have to do that? Test me at every other moment? For God’s sake, Rob, we’re together. We are together and you’re just going to have to face that. You have to face what it means because I do have kids and you do have to deal with them. You have to deal with my family and friends, and that’s why I asked you here today. I’ve spent my entire adult life being careful and cautious and concerned about how I looked and acted to everyone else. The thing with you is: I don’t. From the beginning. And I don’t plan to start now. So get used to it.”
“I don’t kn…”
“You do too know. You’re just too chicken to admit it. To reach for something again. Fine. You can take all the time you need to get used to it. Just quit acting so weird about it. Going to Bethany’s, hightailing it out of here… all of your little games have to stop.”
He stared at her. She was practically ordering him around. How and when did this happen? And why wasn’t he resisting her control and simply hightailing it out of there? Her eyes were on him. If he were going to leave, now was his only chance. His one escape. Still, he didn’t move, and didn’t want to. But he didn’t know how to agree to her terms, which was what he did want. Instead, he reached over, pushing her hair off her shoulder, and kissed her.
Chapter Nineteen
Rob woke up when something landed on his chest. Blinking in the gloomy room, he felt the needle-like claws kneading his pecs. Cat. It was one of Rebecca’s cats, lying on his chest and intending to what? Sleep on him? Looking down at the foot of the bed, he saw where the other cat was already asleep in a ball. On his left, Minnie, the huge dog, had terrible gas, which already woke him up more than once. He sighed as he laid his head back on the pillow, feeling like he could relax now that he knew what woke him wasn’t human or trying to strangle him. Instead, it was simply a member of Rebecca’s zoo sleeping on him. The cat stared at him, and it was uncanny how it didn’t look away or blink. He started to drift off to sleep, accommodating the weight of the cat, when he heard the bedroom door opening, and again, with a start, he looked over, fully expecting to see the silhouette of Doug Randall coming into the house.
The hall light illuminated little Karlee. She stood there, small and sleepy, clutching her Barbie doll. He sat up, his heart racing as if he were caught in the act of having sex, and not just quietly sleeping next to the little girl’s mother. Shit. He was shirtless.
Karlee’s eyes widened. “You had a thweep-over, Wob? How come you didn’t tell me?”
“Uh…” He glanced at Rebecca, who was on her side, sound asleep, her breath rising and falling regularly. How could she sleep through this? The cats jumping on and off the bed, as one or the other clawed through the bedcovers, the dog, with her incessant bad farts filling the room, and now the tiny four-year-old, using her loud voice without a care about the early hour or her obviously still sleeping mother. She spoke as loud as if she were outside in the middle of the day.
“Wanna come down an’ watch cartoonth with me?”
Rob glanced at the time and saw it was five o’clock. Karlee was wide awake and Rebecca still didn’t stir. He sighed, but had no intention of waking her. The only time he ever got up early was out of necessity for his job and survival. But apparently, Karlee didn’t share the same biological clock hours.
“Okay. Just close the door while I get up. Wait out there, Karlee. I mean it. Don’t come in,” he said as sternly as he could, whispering to her over the sounds of the purring cats and the panting, farting dog. Never in his life did he feel so disadvantaged as now, being naked with only a few blankets separating his nude body from the innocent gaze of a four-year-old who adored him.
&
nbsp; “Thure, Wob.” She spun on her heel, her nightgown swirling around her knees when she left. He sighed with relief. He feared she’d come closer to find out why her mother was having a sleep-over with him while they were both naked. He quickly jumped out of the bed, slipping out from under the cat, while stepping over the dog, in order to hunt for his jeans. Putting his t-shirt on, he opened the bedroom door to the blinding glare of lights that Karlee left on. He blinked rapidly, nearly groaning at the bright hallway and the look of gladness on Karlee’s face. She was waiting right there against the wall, not even a foot from the door. So much for a moment to collect himself! She was smiling up at him as joyfully as she was while opening her presents. Slipping her tiny hand into his, she pulled him down the stairs. The living room was barely glowing from the sliver of daybreak that began to cast a bluish shadow over the land.
Karlee flipped on the cartoon channel, and curled up next to Rob, her little legs against his, and her head on his arm. She sat there quietly, watching the cartoons, much quieter and calmer than he’d ever seen her before. He suppressed a sigh. How could he so easily make her content? And even worse, why did her happiness make him feel so right? All of this… the kids, the house, the pets, the normal, ordinary family life was stranger to Rob than anything he’d ever experienced in his life. The details he described to Rebecca for her book were testimony to all the bad, shady things he endured, which he felt he either caused or deserved. The reason why this little, sweet, innocent girl liked him so much was incomprehensible to him. For that matter, the reason why her sweet, innocent mother liked him so much also left him clueless.
“I think my daddy youth to do thith with me.”
He jerked with a start at Karlee’s off-the-wall statement. He’d never heard Karlee once mention Doug. She shrugged with her big, blue eyes looking up at him. “I don’t weawy know for thure. Kathy told me. I don’t wemembah him. An’ he can’t wive with uth wight now.”
“I know, Karlee,” Rob said gently, almost adding, that’s the only reason why he was there.
“I don’t think he wiketh uth much. He didn’t caw to thay happy birthday to me.”
How the hell did someone respond to that? He wanted to bolt out of there. How could he possibly look into her innocent eyes and lie? What could he say, though, to comfort her without it being a bold-faced lie? As sure as he knew his own name, he knew he couldn’t lie to her.
“Maybe he forgot and thought it was today.”
She bit her lip and suddenly grinned as she sat up straighter. “You think hew caw today?”
Rob let a breath out. Of course, he had no idea what Doug would do today, since he knew nothing about Doug Randall. How could he say what the man intended to do? How could he so rashly offer Karlee false hope? And now, how could he take it back? God, these kids were harder than anything he ever imagined.
“I don’t know, sweetie. I just don’t know.”
She nodded and leaned back into him. “It’th okay, Wob, I don’t weawy wemembah him anyway. I wemembah you though.”
He took in a deep breath to stifle a groan. This was not a good sign. Karlee accepted him much too easily.
He glanced up when he heard footsteps and down came Kathy. She looked sleepy. Opening her eyes, she observed Karlee and him before quietly sitting down on the other side of him without a word. Which was how he spent the next two hours. Morning finally brightened the living room slightly, but it was pouring down rain and gloomy. The stormy clouds hung low and hovered over the landscape. But somehow, it didn’t seem as gloomy in Rebecca’s house as it did in his.
****
Rebecca opened her eyes, and stretched out on an empty bed. She sat up. It was nine o’clock. She’d slept the entire morning. And Rob? What? Left? She closed her eyes in defeat. What more could she do? Tie Rob to the bed to force him to give them a chance? He simply wasn’t willing, or able to commit to her and all she came with. She already knew she came with a lot, so much so that most men would run away as fast as they could when they realized she had three young girls.
She got up and threw on some sweats and a t-shirt before padding down the stairs, feeling a little surprised Karlee hadn’t long ago awakened her. Maybe Kayla got up with her. Karlee wouldn’t sit downstairs alone for long. Rebecca stopped dead when she came halfway down the stairs and peeked into her living room where she found Rob sitting on the couch with Karlee and Kathy snuggled in close.
Rob looked up as she came in, and her mouth dropped open for a long moment as they made eye contact. Finally, she swallowed and said, “You’re still here.”
“Yeah. Why? Did you think I left?”
“It wouldn’t be too much of a stretch,” she said, her heart melting as she took in the sight of Rob Williams sitting there with her two youngest girls draped all over him. He was watching cartoons, of all things. Her heart flipped and flopped. Now she was pretty sure that the thing she’d been dancing around for weeks, and trying to analyze, was finally crystal clear; she was in love with Rob Williams. It hit her right then, right in front of her kids, but it didn’t surprise her. Despite their physical differences, and the improbability that they’d ever be attracted to each other, the way to Rebecca’s heart was through her kids. There he was… covered by two of her kids.
“What time did Karlee get you up?”
“Five.”
“You could have woken me up.”
“You looked tired. Besides, the cats and dog woke me up early.”
“Oh.” She bit her lip to suppress the grin. No, her life wasn’t the least bit simple. It was chaotic and full; what man would choose to be part of that?
“Mommy, will you make uth pancaketh?” Karlee asked, her eyes still glued to the TV.
“And bacon?” Kathy added hopefully.
Yes, she would do just about anything today, she felt so happy. So glad. Rob was still there. With her kids and her. She turned and headed towards the kitchen to start mixing up the breakfast she only ever made on Sundays.
Rebecca fed the three early risers and was surprised at how many helpings Rob took. She hadn’t cooked for a man in a long time. Her girls ate relatively little, while she ate a normal amount. And Rob ate as if he’d never had such a meal before. When he caught her looking at him, he grinned. “I didn’t get any dinner; remember? Besides, I don’t think I’ve ever tasted food this good! Don’t know any good cooks.”
Rebecca kept that glad tip to herself. Finally, one thing Joelle didn’t do. Rebecca was pretty sure Joelle could hardly boil water.
They all looked up when Kayla finally stumbled into the kitchen. She froze and her eyes narrowed as she took in Rebecca, Rob, and the younger girls at the table, eating breakfast. She didn’t like it, not one bit, judging by the sneer that contorted her face.
“Kay, do you want some?” Rebecca asked gently.
“No. I’m fine.” She turned on her heel and stomped out; a moment later, her bedroom door slammed. Rebecca sighed. Why did it always happen in life that nothing ever harmonized or went right at once?
She could feel the heat of Rob’s gaze on her. “Seems someone doesn’t like seeing me as fill-in for Doug.”
Rebecca got up and started rinsing the bowl she made the batter in. The girls ran off to start playing again. Rob came closer, leaning his butt against the counter and crossing his arms over his chest.
“You know, there’s no way that you’re a fill-in for Doug,” Rebecca said. “No offense, but you couldn’t be more of a polar opposite to Doug if you tried.”
Rob tapped his fingers against his biceps, and Rebecca glanced over at him briefly. For one, Doug would no more have a tattoo or mount a motorcycle than he would fly to the moon. Doug had sandy-blond hair, which he kept trimmed and currently styled; while Rob always looked like he was long overdue for a haircut and shave. How Rebecca went from being attracted to Doug, which she formerly was, and that type of man, to someone like Rob was pretty difficult for even her to believe. It was no wonder that her mother, her sist
ers, and her brothers-in-law had such a hard time picturing Rob and her together. Since they knew Doug previously, of course, they saw how utterly opposite Doug was from Rob.
“What’s he like?” Rob asked, snapping her out of her reverie. She shifted her gaze from his fascinating, strong arms to his face. His green eyes were watching her, practically touching her while she studied him. Her traitorous, white skin permitted the blush that always lurked there to warm her entire face.
“Doug? Well, he’s extremely tall, about six-foot-three. He always looks nice, immaculate even, and shaves twice a day.” Doug never would have stood in the kitchen with his arms all tattooed and his hair looking shaggy around his dark, stubbly face, like Rob. Doug never wore jeans, and certainly not like Rob wore them! The pair he had on now were faded, ripped, and frayed. Then again, Rebecca couldn’t picture Doug sitting for three hours with two kids who weren’t his own.
“I meant, speaking of personality. I’ve seen his picture. I get what a stretch I am physically from him. And your family. And Kayla.”
“I should talk to her.”
“No. You should let her dislike me if she chooses to. Forcing me on her will only exacerbate it and make it worse.”
Rebecca glanced at him again, temporarily pausing with the soap dripping from her hands. That’s what really got her attention. The surprising empathy and understanding Rob expressed, which didn’t jive at all with his appearance or how he preferred to live his life.
“Doug was a good father, and attentive to the girls, coming home every night. He sat and ate dinner with us, always talking and listening to them. It never seemed like he was just putting time in. He seemed to love them. That’s why it hit all of us so hard. He just up and left them. I get him leaving me. But not them.”
“What was he like to you?”
Rebecca turned away and gazed out her kitchen window. What was Doug like to her? It seemed extensive and complicated. Ten years of complications. How could she summarize it all in a few sentences?
“We’d been together ten years before he left. We had a lot of good times, and I was happy with him. I never regretted getting married so young, or having Kayla so soon afterwards. I loved it. I practically lived for it. Staying home here, with my babies, I got to take care of everyone’s schedules and chores, and spent a lot of time playing with Kayla and Kathy. I raised them the way I would have liked to have been raised. I cooked dinner every night, and looked forward to the time when Doug came home. We spent our weekends playing with the kids or working on the house and the yard. I never longed for the party life you lived. I didn’t want to be anywhere, but here. I never doubted us, or our life together.”
Zenith Fulfilled (Zenith Trilogy, #3) Page 23