He spanked her again. ‘I want a list of names.’
‘Are you going to tell me about every woman you’ve made love to?’
‘If you want me to,’ he said, withdrawing and wandering around the kitchen counter to explore her cube.
Except as soon as you were in it, all exploring was done. Flick used two sets of shelves to divide her bed from the rest of the room, which was an open plan kitchen living room with a small bathroom, only big enough for a shower cubicle. Observing it now, her whole apartment was about the same size as the upstairs room she’d been held captive in at Victor’s.
‘It’s not much, but it’s home,’ she said. ‘Do you live in a mansion?’ Flick wriggled out of her jeans and took off her top at the same time.
‘No,’ he said, dropping onto her couch and laying his arms along the back. ‘I have an apartment.’
‘I’m going to get in the shower. I should go to the coffee shop and find out if I still have a job.’
‘Ok,’ he said. ‘I’ll meet you there in a couple of hours.’
‘Meet me?’
‘I’ve got a few things to do,’ Rushe said.
‘You will...’ she said, tiptoeing closer then pausing.
‘What?’
‘You will come back, won’t you?’
‘You don’t trust me?’
‘I do,’ she said. ‘But... I have no way to get in touch with you, or...’
‘Come here,’ he said. Flick complied and Rushe pulled her onto the floor to sit between his feet. ‘You’re my girl. I’ve been alone... I’d always thought nothing could change that. Getting used to you is gonna take time but I don’t... I’m private.’
‘I know that but—’ His finger touched her chin.
‘You’re not a separate entity; you’re an extension of me. I wasn’t prepared for this, but I’ll make the appropriate adjustments.’
‘You don’t want to be in love with me,’ Flick said. ‘Do you?’
‘No,’ he said. ‘It would be a lot easier if I wasn’t.’
When he scissored her hair in two fingers he tucked it away behind her shoulder. ‘Can I make it easier?’
‘Starting tomorrow you’re going on the pill. I’m gonna shoot my load in you, every day you’re walking out the house with a pussy full of come, you hear me?’ She nodded. ‘I’m gonna take care of you, Kitten... I’m just not sure how yet.’
‘You don’t have to look after me,’ she said. ‘I know we’ll take our time. You won’t want to rush. I mean, I know you’re an independent guy. I don’t want to—‘
‘I have to take care of some things.’
‘Ok.’
‘Get clean, take a nap, or whatever,’ he said. ‘I’ll come and get you from the coffee shop. You can tell them you don’t need your job.’
‘I have bills to pay, Rushe—‘
‘I’ll transfer money to your account. You don’t have to worry about money anymore.’
‘I can’t live off you,’ she said. ‘That’s not fair.’
‘On who?’
‘I have to do something.’
‘You will,’ he said, stroking her hair.
‘I give up my job to become a hooker?’
‘What?’
‘That’s what you’re suggesting, isn’t it?’ she asked. ‘I live off your money, and service you when required.’
‘You do that already, and I haven’t paid you a dime. You don’t want a career in dispensing coffee.’
Flick couldn’t argue that point. ‘I have to find a job.’
‘You’re gonna work with me.’
‘If we’re wholly dependent on each other we’ll be in a forced position. I don’t want us to be together because we have to be. I want us to want to be together. If we split up—‘
‘You better hope we never split up,’ Rushe said, holding her breasts and grazing his thumbs over her nipples. ‘No man touches this; no one touches what is mine. You’ll never be touched by another man, not for the rest of your life. You are mine, Felicity. You are my woman, and I belong to you now. Once I have committed to something I won’t turn my back on it. We won’t split, because I won’t allow it. If something makes you unhappy we’ll change it.’
‘And if something makes you unhappy?’
‘You know me well enough by now, Kitten. I take what I want.’
Lowering his mouth to hers, she hummed against the delight of his kiss. ‘Shower with me,’ she whispered.
‘There are things to take care of.’
‘Sex has to be a priority in our relationship,’ she said on a smile. ‘That will make me happy.’
Flick took her hands from his shoulders and lay out on the floor at his feet. ‘You make a helluva sight, Kitten.’
‘Somehow I always end up naked while you’re fully clothed.’
‘Just the way I want it.’
‘I want you in me,’ she said. ‘Please Rushe, fuck me.’
He considered her. After a long silence he got on the floor, holding his weight on his arms when he lay over her. ‘No.’
‘No?’
‘One,’ he said, admiring her naked figure, then he kissed her one way and the other.
‘What?’
‘You asked me about every woman I’ve made love to. There’s only been one. You.’
For a charmless man, Flick found herself charmed. ‘I want you to be happy too. Tell me if I’m doing something wrong, won’t you?’
‘You’re beautiful,’ he said. ‘I wish I could...’
‘What?’ she asked, sliding her hands from his chest to his neck.
‘You’re a princess, I mean you’re a goddess, and I’m not... it’s like beauty and the beast.’
‘Rushe, I love that you take what you want from me. I love that there are things that go unsaid between us. Flowers and diamonds, and those things are nonsense, it’s superficial and meaningless. I love you. I love how you’re aware of me at all times. I love that you care for me, and anticipate my needs before I have them. I love you, and I don’t want you to change a thing.’
‘I’m not what you’ll be used to. All the romance, and they—‘
‘I left my family to get away from that frivolity. You say what you think. I’ve been on scores of dates in my life. I must have dated a hundred men.’
‘Point, Kitten?’
‘There’s a reason I didn’t let them into my bed. But I slept with you from night one.’ They might not have had sex, but they’d slept. ‘I want to be your woman and only your woman.’
‘Damn right.’
‘What about you?’ she asked. ‘Will I have to share you?’
With another kiss he smiled down at her, she liked that it came easier to him, at least when they were alone.
‘I couldn’t sleep with Simone,’ he said. ‘I could’ve fucked her, and maybe things would’ve been better, easier if I had. She was all laid out buck naked, that skinny little ass, and her tits—‘
‘I don’t want to hear this,’ Flick said, trying to push him away. But Rushe only gave her more of his weight, pinning her in place.
‘She was naked, a hot naked woman lying there primed and ready. I’ve had hundreds of women. Any time a woman was on offer, I took it. On the job, or not, I took sex. I convinced plenty of gangs I was on their side by screwing the right woman at the right time.’
‘This isn’t turning me on,’ Flick said, trying again to push him up. ‘Please move.’
‘No.’
‘I think I’m going to hurl.’
‘I was limp,’ he said. Flick relaxed and drew her eyes to him. ‘It wasn’t just that I didn’t want to fuck her, I couldn’t. In my life that has never happened. I’ve never been unable to get it up. I looked at her spread out on the bed, and it was nothing. I didn’t give a fuck. Her body was nothing to me.’
Flick’s smile spread slowly. ‘Lover.’
‘What?’
Rushe really was as clueless as he sounded, but once again he’d romanced her without
knowing it.
Simultaneously she wrapped her arms and legs around him. ‘He really likes me.’
‘Who?’
‘Your dick, he doesn’t want to be in anyone else. He likes his home in me.’
‘He does,’ Rushe said. ‘But I’m gonna be honest with you, Kitten. I’m never gonna fuck around on you, but in the course of what I do—‘
‘I know,’ she said, holding his face in her hands. ‘On top of the clothes I’ll let you get away with, in the line of duty, but...’
‘But? Kitten? Speak.’
‘Come home to me alive. I don’t care if you have to fuck your way through twenty women, picture me if you have to, but come home to me. I won’t be there the next time to pull you out.’
‘I’ll always come home to you, Kitten.’
‘You better, I’ll keep a list of every man who looks at my breasts.’
‘I’m not sure there are enough bullets,’ he said. ‘You’ll always be able to contact me. I’ll make sure of it... by proxy if nothing else.’
‘By proxy? I thought you worked alone. I don’t want to endanger you. You come home to me, and I promise I’ll be waiting.’
‘You’re gonna learn that being my woman is more complicated than that.’
‘Does being your woman involve sex of any kind? Your dick’s been trying to get out of your jeans. If you loosen up a little I can help him. You can keep talking if you want, I’ll fuck myself if you sit up.’
‘Mm,’ he hummed, taking a bite of her neck. ‘My dick’s got great taste in pussy.’
Flick was aware that they had other things to talk about, but her trust in Rushe filled her with contentment. Whatever the future brought, they had each other. Rushe would look after her, even when she didn’t need him to. She’d have to be sly about it, but Flick was determined to look after him too. Rushe would deny he needed help, but that wouldn’t stop her from giving it to him in any way she could.
After their long shower Rushe had left her alone in the apartment. Being separated from him prickled, but Flick knew that had a lot to do with what they’d been through over recent weeks. So many times they’d been apart, and she’d been sure that she’d lost him forever. Over time she would get used to it, she would get used to being with him, and being away from him. Right now she craved his embrace, but once she got over the trauma of events, they could find a rhythm, and Flick would find things easier.
She had taken her time, once Rushe had gone she procrastinated until she couldn’t put it off anymore. Flick hadn’t relished the idea of going back to the coffee place and giving explanations... not that she actually had any to give. When Flick was told that she had lost her job at the coffee shop, she couldn’t say she was sorry or surprised. But when she turned to leave the shop, she came face to face with Hayden.
‘Good god, what happened?’ Hayden asked, leading her to a nearby table. Flick wasn’t sure what he was referring to until he touched her face.
‘Oh the bruises.’
‘Yes, what happened?’
‘It’s a long story,’ she said.
‘You look terrible, someone has hurt you. Have you been to the police? The hospital?’
Hayden continued to paw at her face, so Flick took his hand and held it on the table. ‘I’m fine,’ she said.
‘You should’ve phoned me,’ Hayden said.
‘What for? I apologise that I missed our dinner... again.’
‘No, don’t think about that. I’ll take you out another time. Are you busy tonight?’
‘No.’
‘You really must tell—‘
‘No,’ Flick said. ‘The story isn’t important, and I can’t have dinner with you.’
‘If you’re busy—‘
‘It’s not that—’
Flick was abruptly yanked up out of her seat by a third party. Hayden blanched at the same time, then sat back. The grip on her arm only loosened when her back fell against his broad chest. Flick didn’t have to see Rushe, his actions betrayed his identity to her. Rushe’s arm fell across her shoulder, his hand draped across her breast, and while he didn’t grasp it, Flick sensed the thought was there.
‘Problem?’ Rushe grumbled, and from the vibration of his chest against her back Flick knew he didn’t move his lips, and the angry brow was secure in its place.
‘What is this? Who do you think you are?’ Hayden demanded, standing up.
‘You really don’t want to be confrontational,’ Flick murmured.
‘What?’ Hayden asked her.
‘I met someone,’ Flick said to him.
‘You met someone?’
‘This is Hayden,’ she said to Rushe, though she didn’t turn.
Flick knew Rushe would recognise the name, and she was getting used to this shadow thing because she deliberately didn’t give out Rushe’s name.
Hayden was clearly disturbed, and she knew he was putting the pieces together incorrectly.
‘Should I phone the police?’
‘No,’ Flick grinned, and took Rushe’s hand from her chest to kiss it, then he hooked both hands on her opposite shoulders, embracing her. ‘This is my boyfriend. My man. He protected me.’ The description felt somehow inadequate.
‘Problem?’ Rushe asked again.
‘It was good to see you again, Hayden,’ Flick said. ‘I wish you all the best for the future.’
‘That’s it?’
‘Yeah,’ Flick said, backing away in time with Rushe. ‘Have a nice life.’
On the walk back to her place Rushe didn’t say anything, but brooding was part of the package. They passed the spot where Flick had been snatched off the street by John, and she mentally relived every second of it. Now here with Rushe’s hand in hers Flick was safe, and Rushe would always make sure of that.
So far they hadn’t spoken about specifics, but Flick assumed since they were going back to her apartment that they would sleep there tonight. Beyond that she didn’t know.
She unlocked and opened her apartment door and was about to proposition Rushe when she noticed someone was already here.
‘Jansen.’
Rushe closed the door, and passed her to join Jansen in her living room. The men shook hands.
‘Everything in order?’ Rushe asked.
‘Yeah,’ Jansen said.
Apparently Rushe was expecting the cop, or had known he was already here. ‘How is Serendipity?’ Flick asked, getting over her surprise to join the men.
‘They checked her out in the hospital,’ Jansen said. ‘She’s as good as can be expected. Her injuries weren’t... it’ll take time.’
‘You’re moving in the right direction.’
‘She was taken because of me,’ Jansen said. ‘I cared about her, and Victor wanted to control the information. It’s difficult to explain to her why that was justified. It’s tough to know if having me around is more damaging than helping.’
‘It’ll take time,’ Flick said. ‘Don’t abandon her just because things are hard. She’ll let you know what she needs from you. Right now she won’t know herself what she needs. Hold her hand, that’s all you can do.’
‘Did you get it?’ Rushe asked.
Flick had no idea what he was talking about. But Jansen pulled an A4 brown envelope from his inside pocket. The item’s length was already folded in half. Rushe took it and tucked it into his own back pocket.
‘Simone’s still not saying much but most of Victor’s guys are in custody,’ Jansen said. ‘Your names have come up, but you know they’ll never find you.’
Jansen’s pointed look at Rushe made her frown. ‘What?’ Flick asked.
‘You’re not so tough to find,’ Jansen said to her.
‘I’m already on it,’ Rushe said. ‘We’ll be out of here within the hour.’
‘We will?’ Flick asked.
She hadn’t considered that the police, or the bad guys, might come looking for her. Naively she’d assumed the drama was over now. From how this pair spoke, a whole new chapte
r could be starting.
‘I can give a statement,’ Flick said.
‘Eventually maybe,’ Jansen said. ‘Victor didn’t work alone, and he owed a shitload of money to men who aren’t going to be happy to walk away without it. Bet your boots that Simone’s already been in touch with them. Do your family know where you are?’
‘No,’ she said. ‘Not specifically. They wouldn’t be able to get in touch with me. Should I—‘
‘No,’ Jansen said. ‘The cops will establish that for themselves. They’ll look for you but...’
His attention switched back to Rushe who remained at her side. ‘Pack your things,’ Rushe said, but he didn’t look at her.
‘I don’t understand why I can’t just tell the police—‘
‘I’m not the only cop in the world who’s ever been blackmailed,’ Jansen said. ‘And that’s not taking into consideration the ones who are downright corrupt. Why do you think I ended up with this guy? The police won’t protect you. They might try but... these criminals are pretty high up in the food chain. Take the risk if you want but... don’t say you weren’t warned.’
Flick reconsidered her actions in coercing Rushe into sex that day. Perhaps the time would’ve been better spent talking. Now it appeared there wasn’t time, so she went to her bedroom, pulled the suitcase from under her bed, and heaved it to the mattress.
While she packed her belongings, the men continued to talk. Their serious expressions were the only hint of the mood, because she couldn’t hear the specifics of their hushed whispers. Putting the last of her jewellery into her case, she left the space to retrieve her things from the bathroom. When she came out again, Jansen was gone.
‘Where did he go?’
‘He’s got to get back to Serendipity,’ Rushe said.
Flick went to the bedroom and dumped the last of the things into the case and zipped it up. Retrieving her jacket from its hanger in the closet, she stuck her arms into the sleeves.
‘I can protect you,’ Rushe said, filling the space in the shelves that acted as an entryway for the bedroom.
‘I know that.’
‘No,’ he said. ‘I mean... I work alone, but there are people I trust. If you want to stay here... I can provide you with the best security money can buy.’
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