“I’ve missed you,” I whispered.
His lips were a breath away from my ear as he leaned down to whisper, “I missed you, too.”
A small tear ran down my cheek. Those seconds in his arms felt perfect. They felt like home.
We stood that way for several minutes, not speaking, just holding each other. His hand traced patterns against my back, sure and familiar.
Eventually, he pulled back slightly to look down at my face. He smiled. “Your makeup stuff is all smeared under your eyes.”
I rubbed my eyes self-consciously. He laughed quietly, watching. We were still close enough that I felt the rumble of his laughter against my middle.
Starting to laugh too, I swatted him on the arm. “Oh stop it. It’s not nice to mock my messy face.”
He suddenly turned serious. “I would never mock you, Em. Ever. And I don’t care if you have smudged makeup. You’re—”
“Emma, you home?” My father’s voice called from down the hall. The front door hadn’t opened; he must’ve been here the whole time.
Eli dropped his arms, and took a quick step backward.
Wait, what had Eli been about to say? I was…what? Of all the times for Dad to decide to come looking for me.
I rubbed more forcefully underneath my eyes, hoping to erase any traces of runaway make-up or tears.
“Hey, Dad! We’re in the kitchen.” I bent down to pick up the can that got away earlier.
My father stepped into the room, reading glasses perched atop his head, holding a sheaf of papers.
“Hey, honey.” His eyebrows rose as he took in the scene. “Eli!” He sounded surprised. “Well, son, you haven’t been around in a while. It’s nice to see you.” Dad walked in and clapped Eli on the back, smiling.
I bit back a grin. Dad always liked Eli, and it hadn’t taken a genius to see it’d driven him nuts when I cut off any questions about Eli’s absence recently.
Eli smiled, then shifted a little under the attention. “Thank you, sir.”
Rolling my eyes at the man-theatrics, I reached out the can toward Eli. “It should be safe by now.”
“Thanks.” He winked. “Again.”
“So how are your folks doing? I haven’t seen them much lately.”
“Oh, they’re good. They got back from California a few weeks ago. They had that business trip to help promote Mom’s work. It went well. A few more shops will be carrying her stuff.”
Eli’s mom designed gorgeous stained-glass artwork, and his dad, some type of business know it all, helped her launch into consigning it at some upscale boutiques. Her art sold as quickly as she could make it.
Dad nodded. “Good for them, happy to hear it. Well, tell them they need to make time and we’ll have a barbeque soon, okay?”
“I will.” Eli shuffled his feet and glanced at me. I smiled and offered him a silent cheers with my soda. He grinned and popped the top of his own and took a long swallow. I instructed myself not to stare at his throat moving, the moisture on his lip.
“Um…we were just heading up to my room. Did you need something?”
“Oh, no. You guys go ahead. I was checking to see if you were home yet. I was working on something.” He waved the papers around, “and lost track of time.”
I turned to Eli, who stood waiting quietly during the exchange. “You ready?”
“As ever.” He smiled.
“Okay, guess we can go up.” I walked over to my dad and kissed him on the cheek. “See you later.”
As I walked toward the stairs, I felt Eli’s eyes on me. It was kind of unnerving, yet also thrilling.
The past couple of days had certainly been a rollercoaster. Now, to just keep myself from falling out of the cart. I could do this. We would talk, and things would be okay.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Eli
When we walked into Emma’s room, I immediately noticed the pink rose sitting on top of her dresser. I stared a second, but didn’t say a word. For once Em broke her parent’s “door stays open” rule. I got the feeling it wasn’t for anything her parents had to be worried about.
Instead of sitting on the bed like usual, we both gravitated toward the floor. I leaned against the wall next to an old guitar Emma had bought years ago, then never learned how to play, and couldn’t help but smile a little remembering how she complained that it gave her callouses. She sat cross-legged near me.
I picked at a frayed shoelace, trying to think how to start. “Why’d you do it?” I couldn’t look at her when I asked the question.
I felt her shift, her body rocking side to side slightly. “I guess…I guess because I wasn’t brave enough to tell you to your face.”
My hand stilled on the shoelace. “Tell me what?” Would she finally admit it? I needed for her to say the words. I felt like so much of it had been a game, and I needed to know where I stood.
“Eli, look…I owe you an apology for what I did, and I realize that. I shouldn’t have pretended to be someone I wasn’t to talk to you. And I shouldn’t have kept it going as long as I did.”
“You said you were going to tell me why you went out with him.”
We were back to the obvious elephant in the room. Jake.
“At first I did it because of you going out with Kelli.”
I stared at her, sure I hadn’t heard her correctly.
“But there was no Kelli. It was you, so that doesn’t even make sense.”
She sighed. “I know it was me, but you were going on about asking her out and I didn’t know what to say.”
My eyes felt like they were about to pop out of my head. “So you decided to go out with some guy you don’t even know because I was telling you that I was going to ask you out?” I shook my head. “Do you realize how stupid that sounds?”
“No, it doesn’t sound stupid to me, because I didn’t know it was me you were going to ask out. I thought it was her.”
“And how the hell could I ask her out? She doesn’t even exist.”
“Well I didn’t know that!” Emma began to yell too.
My mouth gaped open. “Of course you did! You’re the one who made her up!”
She jumped to her feet. “I know that!”
I stood as well, hands on my hips. “Are you insane? You just said you thought I was going to ask out a fictional girl, so that’s why you went out with him.”
“I know what I said. And it’s the truth.”
She’d completely lost it. I covered my face for a moment. “So, let me get this straight,” I said slowly. “You make up some bogus profile and send me a friend request so I’d start talking to you. Oh wait, so I’d start talking to Kelli.”
I knew my voice dripped sarcasm saying the name, but I couldn’t rein it in. “Then, you say all this crap to me about how great you think I am. When I say I’m going to ask you out, to try to see what you think, you instead decide that ‘hey, I better go out with someone else.’” My hands clenched at my sides. “I see you with him, acting like the love-struck little couple. Then the next day, I see you with that”—I jerked my head toward the rose—“and you see me in the window and you look like you’re ready to puke.”
She looked at the rose, then back at me. “What? No, you don’t understand!”
So maybe jerk didn’t send it. “Fine, maybe I jumped the gun there. I know your parents have already done that stuff.”
Before she could say anything, I continued. “Then you come up to me and say you want to talk, only you haven’t really said anything at all. Did I get it all about right?”
Emma looked confused.
“Well, yes, but—”
“Yeah, I thought so. So, tell me, what’s going on with you and…what’s his name again? John? Jackass?”
“Jake,” she mumbled.
“Oh yeah, Jake. What’s going on with you and Jake now?” I practically spit out the words.
She lifted her chin by a fraction. “I’m supposed to be seeing him later.”
Her admis
sion knocked me mute. For a minute.
“Well I don’t really see what more there is to talk about, do you?”
“Eli, you don’t understand.” She reached out to touch my arm.
I jerked away. “Oh, I understand. I understand plenty. I hope you guys have fun tonight.” I couldn’t believe how dumb I’d been. I’d actually thought we had a chance, that she wanted to be with me. And to hear she had a date with him tonight? I needed to get out of there.
“Don’t. Would you just wait?” Her tone was pleading.
“Why? So you can tell me all about him? Thanks, but no thanks.”
“Eli, stop it. You never…”
I stopped, whirling around to face her. “I never what? What, Em?”
She shook her head. “Nothing. Never mind.”
“Yeah, it clearly doesn’t matter anyway.” I opened the door, and began to walk through it, pausing again in the archway. “For the record, I did more than you. And at least when I did it, I wasn’t faking.”
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Emma
How did it all go so wrong? When Eli said everything, it was technically correct, but somehow it didn’t sound right when he’d gone through it. It all sounded twisted and distorted. It didn’t begin to cover how I’d felt through it all, what I’d meant.
I wanted to apologize, to explain, but part of me wasn’t sure what I was really apologizing for. He’d apparently known from almost the get-go, so it wasn’t like I’d deceived him. If anything, he deceived me. He’d kept it from me that he knew the truth.
The doubts grew. Why was he doing this? If he meant any of the things he’d said to me as Kelli, why wasn’t he saying anything now? Did he actually like me, or did he just want me to say it to him to stroke his ego? But that wasn’t him. I told myself to stop thinking crap about Eli. Told myself I knew him better than that.
Sinking to the floor, I couldn’t wrap my head around how bad things had gotten. I leaned my head against the wall and closed my eyes, feeling my chest tighten and tears threaten. Again.
What was I supposed to do about seeing Jake tonight? Part of me just wanted to cancel immediately, but a small, hesitant part wondered if the best thing to do was just move on. To accept that things with Eli would simply never be the way I’d always dreamed.
My mind wandered back to Jake. He was great, but right now, with my feelings for Eli so strong, it probably wasn’t a good time to start something with anyone else. It wouldn’t be fair to him. And even if I told him we could go out just as friends, feeling like this, I wouldn’t exactly make great company.
It would definitely make things worse between me and Eli.
I opened my eyes, staring blankly out the window. My gaze eventually shifted to the photos on the bookshelf a few feet away. Things had been so much easier back then. I picked up a paperback from the floor nearby and threw it. Its pages fluttered open as it sailed through the air before bouncing near the shelves and landing with a thud.
Eli obviously made his decision when he walked out. Maybe a night away from dealing with the whole mess was exactly what I needed.
Chapter Thirty
Emma
“Girls’ night! Girls’ night!” Sarah chanted through the phone. Emphatically.
I’d called Sarah as promised to tell her what happened with Eli after school. After hearing the news, Sarah said I should dump all my men for the evening and make it a girls’ night instead.
“And who are we inviting to this festive occasion?” I muttered.
“Why don’t you call Megan? She’s really nice and would probably be fun to have along.”
“I haven’t had her over in like a year.”
“So what? Call her anyway. Or heck, I’ll call her.” Sarah wasn’t taking no for an answer.
“Okay, you ask her. What time do you guys want to come over?” Maybe time alone with the girls would be exactly what I needed. I smiled, remembering how we used to have sleepovers all the time in junior high.
“We’ll be there around six. Be ready to head out for a little.”
After that abrupt command, the line went silent as Sarah hung up. Now I had to let Jake know that our date for this evening wouldn’t be happening. I stared into space for a minute, trying to think of an excuse that wouldn’t sound like I was blowing him off. None came to mind, mostly because I was sort of blowing him off. Even if it was with the kindest of intentions.
Snatching the phone back up, I scrolled through my contacts until I found his name. I’d take the coward’s way out and send him a text breaking the news.
Jake, I’m really sorry, but I need to cancel for tonight. I need to clear my head a little, so I’m just hanging out with Sarah. Maybe another time?
Less than a minute later, I got my response.
That’s ok, I kind of expected that. And sure, another time would be good. Have fun tonight.
I wasn’t sure what I expected to feel after cancelling, but surprisingly, I only felt a bit relieved.
After checking with my dad to make sure it was okay that Sarah and Megan were sleeping over and to let him know we would probably be going out for dinner, I started getting ready for the night ahead.
Megan was able to come, too. The three of us piled into Sarah’s bright orange beat-up VW Bug, headed to grab something to eat. As usual, Sarah looked adorable in a stretchy long black skirt and an iridescent peasant blouse. She could throw on aluminum cans and still look fashionable. Megan dressed more like I usually did, in jeans and a pink T-shirt.
I’d decided to try to add a little variety to my outfit. Although jeans were still on the menu, I had pulled out a shirt Sarah bought me last year. I’d only worn it once, thinking it was a little too much for me. It was a silvery white loose halter with a low-scooped back. But since tonight was all about relaxing and having fun, I decided to go for it.
Sarah had the radio blasting, so when Kelly Clarkson’s “People Like Us” came on, all three of us screamed and began to sing along at the top of our lungs. I rolled my window down even further, loving the feel of the wind whipping through my hair as the music washed over me.
It felt so good to relax and not worry about anything. I smiled when Sarah pumped her fist in the air out her window and sang along full throttle.
“So throw your fists in the air, come out, come out if you dare, tonight we’re gonna change forever!”
“Amen!” yelled Megan. “Sing it!”
I laughed and moved my head in time to the beat as Sarah pulled into a coveted front parking space at Roma.
“See girls? Tonight is our night. We don’t even have to hike to get to the front door.” Sarah winked and shifted into park.
The lot was almost completely full already. Groups of families and packs of teenagers walked in and out of the front doors.
“It’s pretty crowded for a Tuesday,” Megan said.
“Probably since school’s out for break. Hopefully we can get a seat.” I jumped out after Sarah and Megan, glancing around to see if there were any recognizable cars in the lot. Namely, Eli or Jake’s. It didn’t look like either one of them were there, although I didn’t really expect them to be.
The warm air smelled of fresh baked bread and spicy Italian sauces. Hints of pink streaked through the clouds. The perfect setting for hanging with friends.
My stomach growled as we headed toward the door, and I held my hand over it, laughing. “I didn’t realize how hungry I am.”
“I’m starving,” Sarah agreed, pulling open the glass door.
Crowds of people packed around a small bar, and the tables up front were all full. The aroma of food became even more prominent the moment we stepped inside.
“Maybe there’s a booth open in the back?” Megan asked, as we stood just inside the door, looking around, eyes wide.
“Holy shit, I don’t remember ever seeing it this busy. We seriously did luck out finding a parking space.” Sarah pushed through the small line of people waiting to use the restroom. Her
tiny frame didn’t stop her from being a formidable force.
“What the heck? Is something going on in town? This is nuts.” I followed the path Sarah made. We zig-zagged toward the larger back room that contained booths on one end and arcade games in the far back.
“Hey! There’s one!” Megan waved her arm in the air and pointed wildly. “Hurry, let’s get it before someone else does.” She weaved over to the right, where an empty booth sat with a couple of glasses and a half-empty pitcher of soda.
“Oh, good call, Meg.” Sarah congratulated her. “Looks like they just didn’t get a chance to clear it yet.”
If possible, this room had even less free space than the front, with crowds of people playing the video games and using the pool or air hockey tables in the back.
“Finally.” I slid into the slightly sticky booth. My hand stuck to something on the table. “Ew.”
“Here.” Sarah handed me a napkin from the table dispenser. “I’m sure someone will be by to clear it off soon.”
“Thanks.” I wiped my fingers, wrinkling my nose when the paper stuck a little.
“So what do we want?” Megan asked. “Pizza? Wings?”
“Hmm…why not go crazy and have both?” I suggested with a grin.
“Works for me,” Sarah said, craning her neck trying to spot a server so we could place an order. Suddenly, she whipped her head back around, a look of shock clear on her face. “Emma, don’t look now.”
“What?” I began to turn to look too.
“Emma!” Sarah kicked me under the table. “I said don’t look. Just…here.” She shoved a large menu toward me. “Cover your face with this.”
“What? Why?” I tried to skim the room without being obvious, peeking over the top of the red plastic menu.
Oh please, no. Eli and Kevin were headed our way. I sank down further in my seat, trying desperately to make myself disappear.
Invisibility was apparently not my hidden superpower, because moments later, the two guys stopped right next to our table.
Kevin slid into the booth next to Sarah. “Hey, sexy, keeping the seat warm for me?” He winked.
The Girlfriend Request Page 14