That meant one room each. And well, I wasn’t going to complain, but…
“You look disappointed,” Sam said as he leaned against the dresser while I unpacked my small rucksack I’d brought from Rhode Island. A slow smile spread across his face. “You wanted us to share.”
My face flamed, and my fingers fumbled with my shoes. Sam and I were…well, I didn’t know what we were. Lovers, kind of, but we’d never really put words to our feelings. We’d shared a bed for part of the boat journey, but the cabin had been mine and not ours. Sometimes, I couldn’t help but wonder if it was only about the sex.
“Why would I be disappointed?” I asked. “This room is beautiful, and we’re currently not getting attacked by water demons. Plus plus in my opinion.”
“It’s better if everyone has their own room,” he said as though I hadn’t said a thing. “Keeps things from getting too complicated.”
“Complicated?” I arched a brow. “Or too serious? Wouldn’t want anyone to think we’re more than just fellow warriors, now would we?”
Whoops. I hadn’t meant to say that out loud. For one, I didn’t think that Sam felt or thought that at all, but the words had popped out of my mouth as if from their own volition. Sam had made our “relationship” an open secret. He didn’t go around boasting about it, but he didn’t bother to hide it either. Everyone knew. They’d seen us go to bed together, and they’d seen us come out of my cabin together the next morning, hair mussed, cheeks glowing.
“Erela, I know how you feel about the others,” he said quietly. “And I know how they feel about you. We’re an Order, a unit. Those males are my brothers, even if not by blood. If things get too complicated, I worry that—”
I whirled toward him, hands fisting by my sides. “Are you actually saying what I think you’re saying? After everything that’s happened between us, you’re what? Breaking up with me?”
“I’m not breaking up with you, Erela,” he said quietly. “I’m just saying that we should keep things as they have been. I want you, desperately, but we shouldn’t take it further than that. You take this room, and I’ll take mine. And I’ll come to you sometimes, if you’d still like that from me.”
With a deep breath, I shoved the rest of my packed clothes into the dresser and slammed the door shut. I turned my back on him, blinking back the burning tears that threatened to spill down my face. I didn’t know why I was getting so upset. Nothing had actually changed between us. He was only confirming that things should remain as they had been. But I had opened my heart to Sam, and I had thought that he’d opened his to me. Hell, he hadn’t even spoken aloud for years until I came into his life. Surely that had to count for something.
But apparently it didn’t. All he wanted from me was a physical bond and nothing more.
“Yeah, okay, Sam,” I said, choking out my words. “You should probably go settle into your room.”
Chapter Ten
Sam
I hated spouting Ramiel’s words to Erela, particularly because I thought they were a load of shit. That wasn’t how I felt. It wasn’t even close to it. And seeing the devastation on her face…. my stomach clenched tight. She thought I didn’t care. She thought I only wanted her for sex. I wanted so much more than that. I wanted everything with Erela.
But there was no denying what Lizzie had found in that book, on her own, during the journey over the seas. Erela’s life was in danger. And keeping distance between us might be the only way to save her.
Chapter Eleven
Erela
There were far too many people in this house. That became abundantly clear when I ran face first into Rourke’s chest when I was searching for some nibbles the next morning for breakfast. Apparently, he was doing the same thing, an old (very old) can of instant coffee in his beefy hand.
“Urf,” he mumbled, stepping back to stare down at me through half-lidded eyes. “Sorry, Erela. I didn’t see you coming around the corner.”
I blinked and shook the stars out of my eyes. “S’okay.” A brilliant idea lit up in my brain, and I bit back a smile. “Though, there is something you could do to make it up to me.”
Lilith would probably kill me. But it would be worth it if it meant I could, you know, prevent her death and all. Her literal, actual death. The one that would actually happen if she didn’t get some blood. She needed it to live, and she was in dire need of healing. As stubborn as she was, she couldn’t hold out for much longer.
“Oh yeah?” He dropped the can to the table and screwed off the lid. Leaning down, he drew in a long, slow sniff of the coffee and then let out the kind of sigh that I would have only expected after someone had a particularly pleasurable night in bed. Humans and their vices.
“Yeah, it’s about Lilith. The lovely lady you met yesterday?” I said with a hopeful smile.
He grunted, grabbed a ceramic mug from the overhead cupboard, and then spooned the dark coffee grains into it. “Hard to forget her.”
Hmm. After their little meeting, I hadn’t expected him to seem so gruff. Maybe my little plan wasn’t quite as brilliant as I’d hoped. And I couldn’t very well ask him to let Lilith drink from him if he wasn’t feeling her.
“You know what?” I took a step back and glanced over my shoulder. “Nevermind. I’ll leave you in peace to have your coffee.”
His head jerked up. “No, wait. What can I do to help Lilith?”
“Oh, well.” I placed a hand on the wall, fingered the wood panelling. “You know what Lilith is, right?”
He gave a grunt and a nod, turning back to his coffee beans. Grabbing a jug of water from the table, he tipped it right on top of the beans in his mug. Then, he stirred the concoction with his finger, lifted it to his lips, swore, and then drank the whole thing straight.
I made a face. We didn’t have coffee in Celestia, and I was starting to see why. It didn’t seem particularly appetizing.
When he was done, he slammed the mug on the table, screwing up his face into something resembling pure, unbridled pain.
“Uh, why the hell are you drinking that if it tastes like shit?” I couldn’t help but ask.
“The caffeine,” he said, shuddering once. “It’s glorious. Back before the apocalypse, humans mixed coffee beans with hot water. I’ve actually had it a couple of times before, when the stars aligned just right to provide me with fire and coffee at the same time. The instant stuff is crap, but it’s better than nothing. You’ll just have to take my word for it. Coffee is fantastic, though having it cold probably wasn’t my brightest idea.”
“I’ll take your word for it,” I said.
“So, Lilith,” he said, steering the conversation back onto my lovely demon friend. “Yeah, I know what she is. I told you that yesterday before I met her. She’s a nice demon lady.”
Nice demon lady, I noted.
“Do you know what kind of demon she is?”
He blinked at me. “There are different kinds?”
“Yeah, so there are the water demons we met…well, when we were on the water,” I said, and he gave a nod at that. “And then there are fire demons, ice demons, death demons…blood demons. Lilith is a blood demon.”
Rourke gave me a long stare before he replied. “I think I know where this is going.”
“As you could probably tell, Lilith isn’t exactly at full strength at the moment. The demon who opened the portal attacked her, giving her a terrible wound. She’s having trouble healing from that because she hasn’t had any blood. And she needs to be in tip top shape if she wants to help us track down that amulet.” I gave him a look. “In order to get back to full strength, she…”
“Let me guess,” he said dryly. “She needs to drink a human’s blood.”
“Not all of their blood.
“You have seriously come down here to ask me, first thing in the morning, if I will let a demon I just met drink my blood.”
I shrugged. “At least you’ve had your coffee. So, will you?”
“Dammit,” he mutt
ered.
“She’s a nice demon,” I said, giving him a hopeful smile. “She won’t try to kill you or anything.”
He muttered something too low for me to hear.
“What’s that?” I asked.
“How much blood?” he said, but only a tad louder. “How much blood would she need to drink in order to heal?”
Ding, ding, ding! That was when I knew I had him. Of course, now I would have to convince Lilith to put aside her attraction, or embarrassment, or whatever it was, and actually drink from the guy.
“I’m not sure,” I admitted. “Probably not a lot. I know Lilith would never drink so much that it would harm someone. You seem to be a good judge of character. I’m sure you can see the same thing.”
He let out a heavy sigh, tipped some more instant coffee beans into his mug, and splashed some cold water on top. “Alright. This is going to require another espresso.”
* * *
Despite the fact that they probably wanted some privacy, we all gathered in the living room to watch Lilith drink Rourke’s blood. And by all, I do mean all. His entire crew—all six of them—hovered in the living room with skeptical looks on their faces. The fallen angels didn’t look much different. Only Lizzie looked kind of excited about the whole thing.
“Erela,” Lilith said through clenched teeth. “Why is Rourke going on about blood sharing? I thought I made it clear that I would not be drinking any of this human’s blood.”
I gave her a sheepish smile. “I know, but I didn’t actually ask him or anything. He came to the conclusion all by himself. He wouldn’t be standing here if he didn’t want to help.”
I was kind of bending the truth, but only a little. Rourke had figured out what I wanted to ask him before I’d had a chance to voice the words. And he did want to help. Maybe if Lilith thought this was something he really did want to do, then she’d be okay with it.
“Rourke, I’m sorry,” she said, twisting away from me. “My friend here means well, but she’s gotten the wrong end of the stick. I don’t want to drink from you.”
“Don’t you need some blood to heal? Won’t the angels have a better chance of succeeding if you go with them to get that amulet?”
“Yes, but—”
“But what?”
“Well.” Suddenly, Lilith looked very flustered, something I’d never seen from her before. “Truth is, Rourke, I just...well, I don’t just go around drinking from anyone. I guess I’m just picky about it. We’ve only just met.”
He nodded and clenched his jaw. “I see. You don’t want to drink from me. Maybe one of the other guys here will suit you.”
“Sure, I’ll do it,” one of his crew members said, raising his hand with a shy smile. “I mean, it could be kind of fun, right?”
Lilith sniffed and turned away. Rourke clenched his jaw.
“Oh, for goodness sake,” I said, throwing my hands into the air. “Everyone out. Rourke, go over to Lilith. Lilith, stop being shy and drink from this nice man. We have a damn amulet to find.”
* * *
Strangely, everyone listened to me, though I didn’t stick around to see what Lilith and Rourke would get up to when no one was around to watch them. I figured it was best if they didn’t have an audience, despite my curiosity. The blood sharing seemed kind of personal to Lilith and maybe even sexual? Like I said, they needed some one-on-one alone time.
While we all—minus the human crew members who sauntered back to their rooms—stood out in the hallway, waiting for the results, I felt Az’s eyes on me. I turned and met his gaze. His dark eyes were hot, burning me up from the inside out. I swallowed hard and shifted on my feet, my core tightening, despite the fact that I could also feel Sam watching the both of us.
“Have I done something to annoy you, Az? You won’t stop glaring at me.”
“This gaze is not a glare, darling,” he said in a long drawl before shooting me a wink.
My face flushed, and I cleared my throat. And then I risked a glance toward Sam. His body had tensed, and his jaw flickered from where he was grounding his teeth together. Good. Served him right. He’d made the decision to keep distance between us, which meant he had no right to care what anyone else said or did when it came to me.
But I didn’t want Sam to be jealous. I just wanted him to be mine.
Of course, I wanted Az to be mine, too. Desperately.
“Crazy, isn’t it?” Lizzie said brightly, though her voice held tension as if she sensed the charge in the room. “A demon has a thing for a human. And he’s got a thing for her right back. Gotta say, I didn’t see that one coming.”
“Good on them, I say.” I dragged my gaze away from Sam. “I think if someone has feelings for someone, then nothing should stop said someone with being with the other someone. Or someones.”
I was pretty sure my words were nonsensical to anyone but myself, but I still felt better for voicing them aloud. A strange expression crossed Lizzie’s face, and she opened her mouth to say something that would probably only make the situation that much worse. But then the door to the living room opened. Lilith stood just on the other side, her cheeks now flooded with color, her eyes full of light and life. She gave me a sheepish smile and then motioned for us all to come back into the room.
Rourke was lounging on the sofa, his boots and shirt both off, laying in a pile on the hardwood floor. His muscles glistened with sweat, and his eyes were lidded. He shifted his head and gazed at us with a lazy smile. “You’re welcome. Lilith is now back in working order.”
I raised an eyebrow and shot a glance at Lilith. “Looks like he isn’t though.”
She gave a dismissive wave of her hand, but her cheeks were dotted with pink. “He’s just, ah…a bit high from the experience. He’ll be back to his old self in about an hour.”
“Does this mean you’re ready to head to Berith’s castle?”
“Damn straight I am.”
Chapter Twelve
Erela
We were about a hundred miles from Berith’s castle. The human crew members decided to stick around the house. We thought it best for them not to get involved in demon business. There were booby traps and scary guards, and humans didn’t boast of immortality. After our goodbyes, the gardener ushered the seven of us to another solar panelled vehicle that was parked in a barn at the edge of the property. The thing was…impressive, to say the least. Lilith had somehow found a military vehicle from the old human days of war. It was a large, black hulking monstrosity with tires that were almost as tall as me. The sides were solid metal and probably bulletproof.
We all piled inside, crammed into the stiff seats. Lilith started the truck, which roared to life like a demon in rage. This was going to be a long drive.
Two hours later, our bodies and our minds had been jarred senseless. Lilith stopped at the end of a long drive that was lined with drooping trees, and the six of us who had not been driving practically fell out of the truck in relief. I suppose the thing would come in handy if we were in the middle of a bullet-laden attack, but a smooth ride it was not.
Regardless, we’d made it to Berith’s castle safe and sound (and relatively unscathed—I did have a few bruises). The massive structure loomed before us, casting dark shadows on the mossy ground. There was a gate between two towers, which was open. Clearly, it was meant to lure unsuspecting passersby into its grasp.
“Before we go in,” Ramiel said, passing each of us a weapon in turn, “what can you remember about our first obstacle, Lilith?”
“I’m afraid I was pretty out of it at the time,” she said. “All I remember is that there are some traps and some demons, but I couldn’t tell you what comes first.”
“Right. Well, we’ll all go in together,” Ramiel said. “No matter what happens, we cannot split up. We will confront this head on as a team, as an Order. If any one of us falls, we cannot leave him—or her—behind. Got it?”
I wet my lips. The full danger of the situation was beginning to sink in. We were walki
ng into what was very likely a trap. Berith would have expected we might come here. He was smart. He always seemed to think two moves ahead. Hell, he’d actually made it kind of easy. Too easy. His old castle was the perfect place for him to hide the amulet, which meant that it would be one of the first places we would look.
And yet here we were, walking straight into it.
“Is everyone agreed?” Ramiel said, his voice firm.
We all nodded and murmured in agreement, though I saw the doubt on Az’s face.
“Good,” Ramiel said. “Let’s go.”
With a deep collective breath, we all turned toward the gate and made a slow trek toward the open passageway that would lead us into the depths of the castle. As we moved, I fell into step beside Az. He held his sword before him, looking like the angel of pain and death he was. I held my twin blades in my hands, taking comfort in the familiar feel of them. In front of us, Ramiel and Sam slowly eased forward with Lilith just in front to lead the way. Lizzie and Uriel rounded out the back.
Together, we made it through the gate and stepped into what must have once been a bustling courtyard but now was nothing more than an empty shell. Cobwebs clawed their way up the stone walls and the water-logged grass was pockmarked by puddles of mud and grime. On the opposite side of the courtyard, I spotted a single red door that seemed to glow in the midst of all this gray. It was clean, bright, and sparkling, as if someone had only recently come by to give it a scrub and a shine.
Nebulous: Order of the Fallen - Book Two Page 6