Pickles The Parrot Returns: My Continued Adventures with a Bird Brain

by Abbott, Georgi

  If you’re a lover of birds, and you’d like to attract more of them to your yard while providing for them, plant trees or shrubs that produce berries or other bird food. Provide foraging opportunities, nesting and protection from prey. But most important, offer a water feature – anything from a birdbath or a pond. This is what they look for.

  In British Columbia, we have a government program called Nature Scape. They promote bird habitat, and especially provided as corridors for birds to travel. Development is causing habitat destruction and displacement of birds and other wildlife. Sometimes to the point that they can’t even survive long enough to get to greener pastures. They even want to see people who live in apartments take part by providing a fruity or nutty shrub and water. The more people who do this, the more corridors we can provide. When you join, you are sent a package with all sorts of nice big pamphlets with information on bird species and what they eat, plant species that are indigenous to your area, habitat information and tips to attract birds – all kinds of things. Perhaps there’s something like this in your area?

  This book was not particularly meant to be ‘advice’ for you, I was merely attempting to explain how we deal with things and to give you a glimpse of life with our parrot, Pickles. If you learned something though, that’s wonderful. If I had to give any advice, it would be to spend as much time with your birds as humanly possible. It’s worth it. Every bird is special in their own way and I hope that everyone finds a way to connect with their birds, to watch them closer, think deeper, relate better and really get into their awesome little minds.

  I don’t think I will be writing another book like this, probably not for a few years anyway – but you never know. If you enjoy Pickles’ FaceBook posts, you may be interested in the next book, which will be nothing but his posts for the last year – the ones written in this book are just a small portion of the ones he’s done, with many more to come. At some point, maybe this year, I would like to do a children’s book and perhaps next year, I will do a book for older children. All Pickles related, of course.

  I’ll leave you with that little stinker’s latest little episode, which took place this past weekend while I was finishing the book …

  Every year, in spring, the town of Logan Lake has a community garage sale. It’s very successful and it draws people from all surrounding towns. Every house that wants to participate, submits their address to the district office and they draw up a map of the town and distribute them. The event took place yesterday, on a Saturday, and our neighborhood was bustling with cars and pedestrians.

  Neil and I were working in the yard – cleaning up, mowing, planting seeds in the garden and painting the roof of Pickles’ Aviary. The roof is clear plastic and Neil sprayed a plastic paint to give Pickles more shade on one side. It was a beautiful, warm sunny day so Pickles joined us outside. At first, we weren’t going to bring him out right away because we had to work in the back, where he can’t see us. We left him in the livingroom and closed the screen door but because we kept walking by his window to get tools and stuff, he flew to the couch to yell at us. Every time we walked by, he banged on the window with his beak and hollered “Anybody home? Speak!” We tried to ignore him but he wouldn’t let us. We tried tapping on the window as we passed and talking to him but that just got him more excited. “Want out!” he’d holler. So we gave in and packed him out to the aviary.

  New neighbors moved in across the street – his buddy, Jeff The Whistler, moved two doors down and a family with four kids took over. Pickles wasn’t out for two minutes before the parents walked by with two kids walking and the other two riding in little pull cars. Pickles got excited and started wolf whistling – why, oh why did I ever teach him this when he was young? It’s worse than walking by a construction crew of raunchy, flirty men. And we always get the blame!

  I guess nobody warned them when they moved in because they certainly didn’t seem amused. They didn’t look over, they didn’t laugh, they all kept on walking, looking a little uncomfortable. Nobody ignores Pickles. Each whistle got louder and louder and now all the pedestrians from all around the block, plus people driving by, glanced toward us. Because our yard is circular on one side, and is on the corner of two streets, the street wraps in the same circle so this poor family had to endure the long walk all the way around. Half way through, Pickles starts hollering “Potato Butt! Helloooo Potato Butt!!”

  Now, we have two choices when these things happen. We can ignore everything or we can fight our way through foliage, up to the fence and try explaining. But, being anti-social, we don’t want to talk to everybody that Pickles talks to. Now and then, fine, but not as an ongoing job. So we just left things as they were. One day they’ll figure it out.

  The rest of the day, Pickles spent whistling and calling people names - mostly Rat Baby and Bugger Butt with the odd Poop Head thrown in. At least he doesn’t say Shit Head. At one point, Neil was spraying the aviary roof so when Pickles gave a shout-out to a man walking by, it was obvious to him that Neil was on top of a cage with a bird. He must have still thought it was one of us whistling and talking though, because he said, “Oh, I see you raise pigeons. Nice.” Neil explained that it was a parrot, a talking parrot, so the guy got all excited and asked if he could come in the yard. This is what we try to avoid most times. Sometimes we like to invite people in but today we were afraid it would be just the beginning. But we said yes, and in he came.

  He stood with his face right up to the screen, peering in at Pickles, so Pickles climbed on to the screen and hung face to face with him. “Does he bite?” he asked. “Yes,” I said, “don’t stick your fingers inside”. So he bent over to grab a stick and I said, “What are you doing?” He said he just wanted to see if Pickles would play with it, or bite at it. I thought, well, I guess there’s no harm in that so I didn’t disagree. He takes the stick and starts poking Pickles in the belly – not hard, but poking none-the-less. I snatched the stick from his hand and said, “What are you, some kind of idiot?” He said he didn’t hurt the bird, I said, “I don’t care. How do YOU like it?” as I started poking him in the belly. He called me a bitch and left the yard before I could kick him out. Man, some people are thick. Pickles was still friendly though, he called out “Bye-bye, be right back!” so I had to say “No, don’t”. Cuz I wasn’t sure if the guy thought it was Pickles who said it, or me.

  I took Pickles back to the house to feed him and Neil stayed outside. Later, he told me a couple of women, who live down the street, walked by and asked if the parrot was outside. Neil told them he’d just gone in and they were disappointed because they had heard him earlier and were hoping to visit him. Neil said, “Yeah, he can be pretty noisy” and one woman said, “Not as noisy and annoying as some of the dogs barking in this neighborhood!” Then Neil said, “Well, Pickles barks a lot too, and she said “Yeah, but it’s cute coming from a bird.” Small favors.

  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

  Quick update: We’ve started spraying Pickles with a water bottle since I first wrote about the feather plucking. It’s been about a month since we started and before we started, Pickles was almost completely featherless on one whole side of his chest. Now, I’d say there has been a 75% improvement. We didn’t want to force him but we’ve tried making a game out of it and he’s accepting it. So, it looks like it’s working but if it doesn’t, we will be taking him on the long trek to the vet.

  About The Author

  Georgi Abbott lives in the small town of British Columbia with her husband, Neil, their Min Pin dog, Neeka, and of course, Pickles. They spend most of their time working on wild bird habitat in their yard and sitting around their trout pond. Georgi took early retirement and has been working on her two books the past year – Pickles the Parrot and Pickles The Parrot Returns. She has been writing PickleStores for each issue of Good Bird Magazine for the past few years and has penned some nature, environment and conservation articles over the years.

  www.picklestheparrot

  Fo
llow Pickles on Face Book - http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001506453441

  Pickles The Parrot videos on Youtube.

  Georgi Abbott, PO Box 629, Logan Lake, BC V0K 1W0

  georgiabbott@gmail.com

  Since the First Book

  “I've been particularly talkative and animated today while mom's been trying to concentrate on writing her book. I yelled at her and she told me "Put a sock in it!" I liked those words so I started yelling "Sockinit! Sockinit! Sockinit!". Mom got frustrated and hollered "PICKLES!!!!" and I said "That's my name, don't put a sock in it!”

  “Toast is confusing. Mom&dad made a toast when mom's first book was published. Mom tells me if I keep teasing the dog, I’m gonna be toast. Then in the morning, with breakfast, she asks if I want toast. I'm never really sure if I should answer that.”

  “Soooo, mom had been saving some of my feathers but they were kinda dusty so she washed them. Then dad washed a big jar that her dill pickles were in and put them in there to keep them clean. She just went to pull one out for somebody and all my feathers smell like pickles - Not 'Pickles', but 'pickles'. She ragged on dad for not cleaning the jar good enough but I found it kinda fitting.”

  “When I write my own book, I’m gonna have scratch&sniff pages and also peel&lick pages. That way, if the book's lousy, people will still say it smelled and tasted excellent!”

  “If mom plans on being an author, I think she should start looking for a real job.”

  “Now that mom's book is finished & at the printers, I decided I should write my own book. I have been working full time on it and after much thought and effort, I have already chosen the font and numbered the pages. It's coming along beautifully.”

  “I'm getting pretty famous because of mom's book. I think they should make a movie about me and make me the star of that movie. But I heard the camera adds 10 pounds so that would make me 11 pounds! That might make it a scary movie.”

  “Sometimes, when you read a good book, it's like the writer is right there in the room with you, telling the story. So I just tape everything he says rather than waste my time reading. That way, I can play with my toys while listening to a good story.”

  “Mom has finished the book and it's now at the printers! How bout a big square of applause!”

  “Mom thinks her ancient computer stifles her writing. I don't think it stifles her enough. Probably the only people who buy her books are the kind who moves their lips when they're reading.”

  What a ride! So much has happened since Pickles and I published the book “Pickles The Parrot” and what fun we’ve had! It all started a couple of months before the book was finished and while I was still working on it. I had already quit my job back in May/2010 and decided I was going to finally write a book about Pickles while I was looking for new job. People who had been following Pickles’ antics through the stories I had been writing for Good Bird magazine, had been pressuring me for years to write a book about him, including Barbara Heindenreich, the owner/editor of Good Bird. So, I began to write.

  By August, as the book was winding up, I sought a bit of a distraction and, on a whim, I started a Face Book page for Pickles TheParrot. At first, Pickles’ ‘friends’ consisted of family & friends and it was fun because everything we wrote was from Pickles’ perspective and it incited some pretty interesting and funny conversations. Of course, Pickles can’t actually think and say, let alone type, the things he posts but I try to stay true to his character and his wit and intelligence. If Pickles could talk, you just know that’s the way he’d be. He’s a deep thinker with a sick sense of humor. He can be demanding and sometimes cruel. He has a touch of evil but mostly he just likes to screw with your head. Aside from his tyrannical tendencies, he can really turn on the charm and will even cuddle when he gets the urge. But I see the way he scrutinizes things, thinks about things and reacts to things. He’s a deep thinker with the ability to apply his thoughts whenever physically and mentally possible. So, if he could talk, I know damn well he would express things as I do, for him. I am Pickles, and Pickles is me (on Face Book). I understand him so well because I’m as sick as he is.

  Not only do I begin to think I’m actually Pickles but everyone he talks to starts thinking they’re actually talking to a parrot. My mom, Zoe (Pickles’ Nana), wakes up every morning to coffee and Pickles. She reads his posts, comments, argues with him until she has to snap out of it and remind herself it’s Georgi she’s talking to, not a BIRD! I get FB messages all the time from people who say how silly that they always forget that I’m behind the voice and they’re surprised at how easy it is to get caught up in it. Indeed, one woman sent Pickles a nasty message, demanding he stop writing such mean things about his mommy! I had to forgive her because, honestly, I sometimes worry that I myself might one day teeter over the edge as I take on his persona on Facebook.

  It didn’t take long for Pickles Facebook page to catch on and before long he had over 1500 friends – most of them as fun and weird as Pickles. His page got busier and busier to the point it was hard to keep up, what with visiting our friends’ pages and posting on our own – it takes time and effort to come up with clever posts each day. Pickles even got engaged to a sweet and very humorous Amazon named Fiona Happy-Tater who lives in California.

  Fiona’s mom, Tamber - bless her heart - even came to the rescue when I was trying to develop the cover for my last book. She did such an awesome job that I had her do this book too. Blatant promo – Tamber makes the most beautiful jewelry and often uses special little stones and incorporates birds into the pieces. She does this for rescue centers and when you buy an item, you can choose any place you would like the proceeds to go. You can check her out at www.etsy.com/shop/biggreenbirdstudio The networking that occurs on FB is mind-boggling and the parrot community provides entertainment and camaraderie like no other.

  The last year has provided more bonding time between Pickles and myself. Since I wasn’t working and I was writing books about him and posting on FB, it allowed more time with him for observation and material. Neil and I have always spent a lot of time with Pickles anyway but this provided more quality time for us. I told Pickles I was writing a book about him and he said “Now?” “Yes, Pickles – and you have your own FB page too! What do you think of that?” “That’s crap” he responded. Oh well, I was having fun and wasn’t about to let him put a damper on it.

  I’d like to thank every one of Pickles’ FaceBook friends for all the advice, laughs and entertainment but mostly I’d like to thank you all for making my first book such a success. You bought the book, you reviewed it, you promoted it for me on you own pages and I can’t thank you enough for being a part of this.