Tarpals shot the burly Gungan a cool stare. In a low voice, Tarpals said, “It no gotta be like dis, friend.”
“Oie boie,” Jar Jar muttered nearby. Jar Jar had heard Tarpals talk in that low voice before, and he had a good idea of what was about to happen.
“What yousa mean, ‘no gotta be like dis’?” asked Moppo, who quickly added, “Un mesa no yous ‘friend’!”
“What mesa mean isa dis,” Tarpals continued in his low, steady voice. “Wesa no gotta fight. Yousa just gotta tell all dese fellow warriors dat yousa was mistake-en, un dat mesa cross-ed da ravine fair un square. Den wesa can go on wit da Big Nasty.”
“Mesa no tink so!” Moppo answered, and he threw a heavy-fisted punch at Tarpals’s head.
At the moment Tarpals’s accuser threw the punch, there were over sixty Gungans gathered at the second checkpoint. None of the eyewitnesses could agree how Tarpals had moved, but they all agreed that he moved very, very fast. In the time it took for a Gungan to blink, Moppo Dop was crushed facedown on the ground with Captain Tarpals’s left knee pressed into the small of his back. Tarpals gripped Dop’s right arm, which was twisted up behind the gulli-ball player’s back at a painful angle. The only Gungan present who wasn’t surprised by Tarpals’s action was Jar Jar, who knew Tarpals was very good at ending fights quickly “As mesa sayen,” Tarpals said as if he were carrying on a casual conversation. “It no gotta be like dis. What you say to dat, friend?”
“What gooie-on?!” bellowed Boss Nass as he pushed through the onlookers. Boss Nass was even more out of breath than Jar Jar. When Boss Nass saw Captain Tarpals standing over Moppo Dop, Boss Nass exploded, “What da meanen of dis time-out?”
“My make mistake, Boss Nass,” groaned Moppo Dop from the ground. “My accuse-ed dis guy of fibbin un cheaten. Mesa renouncen me accusation.” Boss Nass’s eyes went wide. “Yousa accuse-ed Captain Tarpals of fibbin un cheaten?!” Boss Nass sputtered in fury. “Tarpals always tells da truth un nebber ebber cheats!”
“Dat’s what mesa tryen to tell everybody, Boss,” Jar Jar interrupted.
Boss Nass ignored Jar Jar and said, “No more time-out. Da Big Nasty must go on!” Boss Nass watched as Captain Tarpals helped Moppo Dop up from the ground. He even watched the two of Gungans shake hands as Tarpals accepted Moppo’s apology. But Boss Nass was still furious, if only at himself. He couldn’t believe he’d missed seeing the fight.
The next stage of the Big Nasty marathon was not far from the second checkpoint. A river flowed past the old watchtower, and the contestants jogged on a trail alongside the river until they arrived at the top of a high cliff that loomed over Lake Umberbool. The river loudly rushed over the edge of the cliff, sending a waterfall to the lake below.
The goal was to return to Lake Umberbool, then travel back to the arena. Cliffdiving was not for the faint-hearted, and some of the contestants took a step back from the perilous drop. Most of the athletes would choose to ride the waterfall out over the edge of the cliff and fall to the lake. Captain Tarpals was an experienced diver, and he stood at the edge of the cliff, trying to gauge the winds. Over the years, several Big Nasty contestants had been injured when high winds slammed them against the cliff. While Tarpals studied the winds, Major Fassa stepped up next to him at the cliff’s edge.
“Dat was some fight back dare,” Fassa commented. “Yous had mesa concern-ed.”
Captain Tarpals felt himself blush. He’d been right, and Fassa had been concerned about him. “Why yous concern-ed?” he asked. “Yous concern-ed dat mabee mesa a fibber or dat my no know how to defend meself?”
“Neither,” Fassa replied. “Mesa was concern-ed dat yous was gonna paste Moppo Dop permanent-ly.”
Before Tarpals could respond, Fassa said, “See yous at da finish line,” then leaped from the cliff, diving headfirst to the water.
As soon as Fassa plunged into Lake Umberbool, she was caught by an undertow and swept into a large cavern at the base of the high cliff. She peered out of the cavern to see the other Big Nasty entrants —including Captain Tarpals — raining down into the lake. She was about to swim after them when she heard a mechanical humming behind her. Turning cautiously, Fassa spied a glowing light in the underwater cavern.
The light came from an oval porthole on a mysterious submarine. It was an angular vessel, and lacked the elegance of Gungan-designed subs. Fassa realized it must have been transported to Naboo from another world, and she wondered if the sub had anything to do with the mine-setting droid she’d encountered earlier. She decided to investigate, even though it meant she might lose the Big Nasty Free-For-All.
Fassa moved closer to the sub’s porthole and looked inside. She saw two chrome-plated droids on the bridge. One droid was seated at a control console, and the other stood at full attention. Neither was equipped with fins, but they appeared to be the same model as the droid who planted the mine.
The seated droid spoke. Major Fassa pressed her head against the sub and listened. Through the sub’s hull, she heard the droid say, “...and then we’ll fire the torpedo at the arena. That should keep those Gungan creatures occupied.” The seated droid then activated the sub’s engines and the vessel began to move out of the cavern.
Fassa had no idea why the droids intended to fire a torpedo at the arena, but she would do anything she could to foil their plan. Since she didn’t have any means of warning anyone at the arena about the sub’s approach, she knew she’d have to board the sub and deal with the droids. As the sub left the cavern and entered the lake, Fassa swam below it and found an airlock hatch. It was locked.
Major Fassa removed her belt and inserted the buckle’s tongue into the lock. A few seconds later, she had managed to pick the lock and slide the hatch open.
She rose up through the airlock hatch and entered the sub’s pressurized interior. She was in a cargo hold just behind the sub’s bridge. The cargo hold was stocked with many weapons, including two mines that were identical to the one Fassa had found. She could also see several coils of long rope and assorted tools. Water dripped off her body as she stepped away from the hatch and moved toward an open passage tube that led to the bridge.
“Halt, intruder!” a mechanical voice behind Fassa commanded. She felt the cold tip of a blaster muzzle against the back of her neck. Apparently, a third droid had been stationed in the cargo hold. While the droid kept the blaster braced against Fassa’s neck, the two droids that she’d seen through the porthole appeared at the other end of the passage. One of the two droids aimed a blaster rifle at Fassa.
The droid without a blaster — the one who had been sitting at the control console — issued a simple command: “Destroy this creature.”
Fassa ducked fast. The blaster-wielding droids fired, shooting each other, and both were instantly fried. As they clattered to the sub’s deck, the third droid raised its skeletal arms and walked backward into the bridge. “Please, don’t harm me!” cried the droid. “I was only following orders!” Before Fassa could respond, the droid brought one of its metal hands down upon a switch on the control console. Fassa heard a whooshing sound, and the sub shifted slightly. Fassa recognized the noise.
The droid had just fired a torpedo.
“You should have shot me when you had the chance, you fool,” the droid commented in a chilling voice. “That torpedo will reach your arena in less than one minute.”
A blaster pistol rested on a shelf near the control console and the droid grabbed it. Fassa dove across the bridge and tackled the droid, sending it smashing against the wall. The droid accidentally fired its blaster and shot one of the two downed droids. Fassa chopped the droid’s wrist and knocked the blaster pistol from its grip, then placed her hand under the droid’s chin and rammed him into the sub’s low ceiling. The droid’s circuits shorted and its body crashed to the deck.
Major Fassa moved quickly to the sub’s control console and examined the torpedo guidance system. According to a small monitor, the torpedo would strike the arena in less than forty
seconds. Below the monitor were ten manual guidance-override switches that could be used to transmit a signal and alter the launched torpedo’s programming. Although Fassa didn’t know the function of each switch, she hoped to deactivate the torpedo or direct it away from its current path.
Fassa threw a switch. According to the sub’s computer, the torpedo had decelerated, but it was still on course for the arena. Fassa threw a second switch, and the torpedo’s speed increased. Desperate, she threw a third switch. On the monitor, she watched the torpedo climb, ascending until it broke the surface of Lake Umberbool. The torpedo deployed a set of thrusters, and the weapon launched straight into Naboo’s upper atmosphere, where it exploded harmlessly.
Fassa was not entirely relieved. Although she had subdued the droid invaders, seized their submarine, and foiled their attempt to torpedo the arena, she didn’t know why they had come to Naboo. She hoped that Naboo’s engineers could pull the droids apart and find out more about them.
Then she remembered the Big Nasty Free-For-All.
Since the Big Nasty allowed entrants to use any means of transport they could find along the course of the competition, Fassa realized she would not be breaking any rules if she were to pilot the captured submarine to the arena. Although she’d never operated a sub from another world, she believed she could manage it. She gripped the controls and steered south toward the center of Lake Umberbool.
As Major Fassa navigated the sub to the arena, she sped past dozens of Gungans swimming the final stretch of the marathon. When the immense arena bubble came into view, Fassa realized she just might win after all.
At this point, readers who chose to follow the adventure in the Star Wars Adventures Game Book can return to Festival of Warriors.
No one had ever finished the Big Nasty Free-For-All in a captured alien sub. After Major Fassa had reached the arena, she’d steered the sub through a large access tube that led up to the finish line. At first, when the sub broke the surface of the water-filled track, the spectators gasped, wondering whether the arena had been invaded. But when Major Fassa stepped out of the sub, the entire audience burst into thunderous applause. The spectators had no idea how Fassa had acquired the strange, angular sub, but they didn’t doubt she had won the Big Nasty.
Soon after Fassa’s grand entrance, Captain Tarpals entered the arena and was the second to cross the finish line. After he swam across the line, he climbed out of the water and joined Major Fassa at on a docking platform next to the alien sub.
“What’s da big idea?!” Tarpals shouted to Fassa over the roar of their audience. “Bringen dat sub inta da arena is nutsen.”
“Big Nasty rules got nutten against usen found subs,” Fassa shouted back.
“Mesa no worry about da rules,” Tarpals insisted. “Is dat sub arm-ed wit weapons? It cowdabe endangerin everybody inda arena!”
“Mesa deactivate-ed da sub’s weapons onda way,” Fassa answered curtly. “Also capture-ed three mackineeks.”
“In dat case...” Tarpals replied, “congratulations on winnen da Big Nasty.” He extended his hand, and Fassa shook it.
Jar Jar Binks came in thirteenth, and Boss Nass finished respectably in forty-eighth place. Boss Nass was both stunned and extremely impressed when he learned the details of Fassa’s accomplishment. While the crowd continued to cheer, Boss Nass summoned his Rep Council to the festival arena finish line to discuss the alien sub and droids.
“Wesa gonna get to da bottom of dis,” Boss Nass declared to the Reps. “Mesa wanten to know why a buncha mackineeks was speeden around ina sub, setten up mines un launchen torpee-does! If somebody sent dese mackineeks to Naboo, somebody is gonna get pasted!”
Far from Lake Umberbool, the ruins of the Gungans’ sacred temple were located in a dense rain forest on Naboo. Two kilometers east of the ruins, an old, battered starship rested in a clearing on the jungle floor. It had sharp, angular edges, and had been covered with a dark green camoflage net which concealed it from the view of anyone who might have happened past.
A chrome plated droid knew exactly where to find the starship. The droid had a barrel-shaped chest and skeletal limbs, and it clanked up the ramp to the starship’s bridge. Inside the bridge, the droid walked over to a blue-skinned, blackhaired humanoid male who sat in the captain’s seat at the central command center. The humanoid wore an expensive, meticulously tailored red uniform, which matched the color of his eyes. His black leather boots were so polished that they gleamed under the bridge’s dim lights. He swiveled in his seat, trained his red-eyed gaze on the chrome droid, and said, “Report.”
“One droid and a mine were disabled at the outpost bubble in Lake Umberbool,” the droid stated in a synthesized voice. “The sub and the three droids on board failed to torpedo the Gungans’ arena bubble. We believe they were captured.”
“Excellent,” answered the humanoid. “That’s better than if they’d torpedoed the arena.”
The droid blinked its photoreceptors. “Forgive me, sir, but I don’t understand your logic.”
The humanoid sighed. He hated explaining things to droids. “I sent those droids and the sub to Lake Umberbool to keep the Gungans occupied and away from the sacred ruins. The Gungans will likely try to take apart the sub and droids, searching for clues to their origin. By the time they learn the truth, our work will be done and we’ll be long gone.”
“But we’ll have lost the sub and the droids,” the droid noted.
“They can be replaced,” said the humanoid. “Besides, now that we don’t have to load the sub back onto the ship, we’ll have even more room for artifacts. And the more statues we can take, the richer I’ll be.”
“Yes, Captain Swagg,” the droid answered. Although the droid often found it difficult to understand his master, the droid had to admit one thing: Captain Swagg was a very cunning pirate.
NEXT ADVENTURE:
Fight the
PIRATES FROM BEYOND THE SEA
11.6.18.15.14.5-1
Star Wars - Episode I Adventures 010 - Festival of Warriors Page 4