“We’re divorced. You divorced me. There is no turning back from that,” Crow said.
“But what if there was? What if we could do it all again, Crow? What if we had the chance to do it all again?”
“Don’t do this.” Crow shook his head.
“Just think about it. Please. Just think about us having the chance to do it all again.” Desperation sounded in Jaci’s voice.
Crow pulled himself away from the tree that he was leaning against. He walked over to his ex-wife and looked down at her lipstick-lined pouting mouth and tear-filled eyes.
He squared his jaw and his mouth formed a hard line.
“Okay. You wanna know, J? You wanna know what I would do given the chance to do it all again?”
She looked at him with just a hint of triumph in her eyes and leaned in pressing her breasts against him. “Tell me, honey.”
He put his hands on her arms and pushed her squarely away from him.
“I would go back to the very first time that I saw you and ride like hell in the other direction.”
Crow heard her sharp intake of breath, saw the pained look in her eyes—the one he had seen a thousand times before.
She had been right.
What she said had been dead-on.
It’s what they did.
Time and time again.
It’s what they did.
She always came back.
And he always took her back.
He knew it was fucked up and he had no idea why he did it, he just did. Maybe it was because years ago when Crow was just a scared lost kid someone had opened up their heart to him and that had made all the difference. Prosper taking a chance on him had made all the difference. And he guessed he had wanted to give Jaci that chance. And now he realized that all along he had been confusing love with that need to pay it forward.
It’s what they did.
Now here, she was standing in front of him just like a million times other times.
But now there seemed to be an honesty in her eyes that he had never seen before.
“Crow, please listen to me. I’m ready to come home now. I'm done with the on and off between us. I don't want to do that anymore. It's you I want, it's always been you. I was just too stupid to see it. No matter how hard I try, a part of me just won’t let you go.”
A quiet confidence born of years of practice crept into Jaci’s voice.
“We belong together.”
Crow narrowed his eyes at her and scrubbed his hand through his hair. Then he walked over to the Porsche and held the door open.
“It’s too late, Jaci. Years too late. We’re finished. This thing between us is done. It’s finally fucking done. You need to get outta here. Now.”
Jaci started to say something, but after taking a good look at the expression on Crow’s face, she stopped. Then she summoned up what was left of her pride, lifted her chin and got into the car.
“You and I will always be unfinished business,” she said to him from behind the wheel. Then Jaci slammed into reverse and sped out of the driveway.
Chapter 34
After Crow dragged a screaming, clawing, Jaci out of Melissa’s house, she walked back into the kitchen from the hallway. Melissa and Jules shared a long, hard, silent look. When the big guy lifted a questioning brow and gestured to the whiskey bottle that still sat on the counter, Melissa grabbed it by the neck and chugged down a bracing amount. When she slammed it back down on the shelf, her eyes hit the splintered gaping flooring. Melissa realized fully for the first time just how badly she could have gotten hurt. Then she thought of how Jett walked over that same floor space several times a day. Her eyes suddenly filled with tears and she swayed unsteadily.
“Sit the fuck down, woman.” Jules voice sounded far away, but his tone brooked no argument. Melissa fought to keep the wave of nausea in check as he examined her for broken bones, took her pulse and looked into her eyes for evidence of concussion. Satisfied that, except for the deep lacerations, she was otherwise fine, he cleaned and bandaged her wounds with a surprisingly gentle touch.
Her already frayed nerves were suddenly hit by the deadly quiet. She was not sure where Crow had taken his ex, but the crazy look in Jaci’s eyes told Melissa that the screaming woman was not finished. So with a heartfelt thank you to Jules, Melissa left him sitting at her table, rolling an enormous joint and staring at the gaping hole in the floor.
Melissa made the painfully slow trip up to her bedroom, stripped down and threw the bright yellow, blood-stained dress in the trash.
She could feel almost feel its disappointment as it sat banished in the wastepaper basket.
She knew exactly how those little daisies felt.
She wanted to cry.
But instead comforted herself by pulling on a favorite pair of pajama shorts and a matching tank.
As Melissa fought through the growing pain of a blinding headache, she wondered again at what the hell had just happened. The floor giving way had just been a matter of time, she guessed.
Okay, maybe that particular calamity could be reasoned out, she allowed.
But Jaci?
Why had she been knocking at her door? Crow had told her they were divorced.
Or was that something she had assumed?
Or maybe heard from Patrick?
It was all too much.
Melissa’s mind barely had time to form those questions before the pain wrapped around her head like a boa constrictor. When the unmistakable roar of an angry engine filled the air, Melissa flinched and glanced out the window. She saw Jaci’s Porsche scream a loud retreat down the driveway.
Good riddance, Melissa thought through the haze of massive migraine pain.
Now she stumbled to the bathroom where she rifled her way through the medicine cabinet until she found the prescription bottle sitting on the top shelf. She held it in her hand hesitantly. Although the prescribed narcotic was effective, the side effects were wicked. Melissa knew once she took it that she would be useless for the rest of the day and probably pretty fuzzy into the next morning.
Another sharp flash of blinding pain made her run to the bathroom and begin to vomit in a gasping stream of dry heaves. No longer hesitant, Melissa groped for the medicine bottle that she had dropped on the tile floor next to her.
With shaking hands, she tried and failed repeatedly to open the child-proof cap. When she finally was able to unscrew the top, Melissa pushed a pill down her throat in a quick gulp, then held her mouth straight under the faucet. She walked unsteadily to her bedroom, turned on the fan and pulled the shades tight against the light of day.
As she lay curled up in bed and waited for the medication to kick in, she felt herself falling in and out of consciousness. It seemed she had just dozed off for a moment or two when she heard the squeak of the bedroom door open. Melissa turned her head sharply against the intruding light and saw stars of pain explode again behind her eyes.
“Jett …” Melissa groaned as the door open further and she tried to pull herself up.
A set of heavy footsteps crossed and stood by her bed.
“Melissa? You okay?”
Melissa slumped back on the bed. The soft rumble of his voice caused her to quiver in pain.
“Crow?” She whispered. “Where’s Jett…what time is it?”
“It’s about two and Jett’s at the campout. You don’t remember?”
“Oh. Yeah. That’s right.” She whispered fuzzily. “My leg hurts like a sonofabitch, but I'm okay.”
Crow raised an eyebrow at hearing her use the very unlike-Melissa phrase.
“This medicine makes me a little loopy, but when it kicks in it'll take away the pain.” She sighed from behind closed eyes.
“What medicine?” Crow asked.
“Migraine meds,” she answered.
“Since when do you get migraines?” he asked.
The floorboards squeaked under his feet and Melissa felt a fresh burst of pain and another wave of nausea roll over
her.
She clutched the sides of the bed and groaned. “Go away.”
Crow bent towards her and laid a cool hand on her head.
“What causes them? I’m sorry about that shit with Jaci…”
She groaned. “No. It’s not that. They just come on kind of suddenly. And hurt like hell.”
Crow saw the prescription bottle on the nightstand. “Whoa. This is some intense shit.”
Melissa let out a long sigh “I know. It makes my mind all fuzzy… gets me dizzy.”
Crow sat on the bed and pushed away the damp strands of hair that clung like spiders to her pale face. “Babe, these pills…”
Melissa interrupted him in a soft slur of words.
“…are the only things that give me some relief. I don’t take them often. It has been a long time since I had a headache this bad…” Her voice trailed off. Melissa began to doze again, then felt the blessed coolness of a wet cloth being placed tenderly on her forehead. She sighed as Crow’s strong hands gently lifted her head and moved to the back of her neck where his thumbs pressed against the stinging knots of muscles. A tear formed and slipped down her cheek as the pain began to recede.
Melissa heard the quiet alarm in his voice. “Am I hurting you?”
When he went to pull away, she immediately reached for his hands. "No…please… don't stop… it helps."
As Melissa slumped back onto the pillow, Crow’s hands beneath her head massaged the tight clumps of muscles at the base of her skull.
He stayed with her through the afternoon. He alternately rubbed her neck and temples and refreshed the cool cloth on her forehead until the quiet rhythm of her steady breathing was interrupted by only an occasional moan. The need to blame someone for Melissa being hurt under his watch was strong. His thoughts volleyed from a feeling of angry self- recrimination to a murderous rage directed at Patrick Murphy.
While Crow blamed himself for not doing a better job of inspecting the kitchen floor, it had never occurred to him that the spongy spot he had felt was something other than surface rot. Truthfully, the fact that it had extended all the way to the subflooring and ceiling rafters of the basement? That spoke volumes about the overall condition of the basic structure of the house. And that was on Murphy.
The property manager/attorney, who should have spent a little less time putting together a fancy folder of potential buyers, and a little more time making sure the fucking place was safe enough for a woman and a kid to live in.
Crow was not fucking happy.
At all.
And just a few moments ago, he had sent off a more than willing Jules to let Patrick Murphy know just how damn unhappy he was.
Exhausted now with the stress of the day, Crow moved from the side of Melissa’s bed and pulled out the easy chair from the corner of the room. He had just settled in for a minutes worth of uninterrupted peace when the small sound of Melissa's voice punctuated the silence and sent him back to a state of full alert. He leaned in to hear her drug induced mutterings.
“The headaches…they started after Jesse’s funeral. There were so many people talking … sorry…they kept saying that they were sorry…” Melissa let out a sigh of abject misery.
“Shhh, baby. It's okay.” Crow murmured reassuringly.
A tear formed and slipped down her cheek. When Crow moved to wipe it away, she grabbed his hand with surprising strength.
“They didn't know… no one knew,” Melissa repeated over and over, fighting through the haze.
“What didn’t they know, baby?” He rubbed her forehead gently.
“They… didn’t know… that it was my fault… they didn’t know… that I killed him,” Melissa shocked Crow by muttering.
Crow stayed by her side as Melissa continued her low rant, murmuring all the while in small fragmented sentences. At times, her voice was no more than a whisper. So low that it made her words almost impossible for Crow to hear.
Almost.
But not quite.
Chapter 35
Melissa awoke hesitantly. Her mind was still dull from the effects of the migraine medication, but thankfully the blinding pain behind her eyes seemed to be gone. Pieces of the day before came flashing back to her in jagged flashes, starting with the accident in the kitchen and ending with a vague memory of Crow sitting by her bed. But the rest of it was a blur.
Images of Jaci. Jules. A gaping hole in the floor and Crow.
Jesus. No wonder she had gotten a migraine.
Coffee.
The warm, welcoming aroma of fresh brew reached in past the fuzziness of Melissa's awakening senses and teased her into full alertness. Someone was banging around in her kitchen.
And whoever that someone was had made coffee.
Melissa got out of bed, threw on a light robe and made her way down the stairs to find Crow leaning against the counter talking into his cell. When he saw Melissa, he gave her a small nod in greeting. Then, without breaking his conversation, he poured and handed her a cup of a dark roast from the full pot on the counter.
Crow ended the call.
“Morning.”
Melissa closed her eyes and sighed deeply at the taste of the hot fresh brew.
“Morning.”
“Feeling better?” Crow asked.
“Yeah. I am. What are you doing here?” Melissa took another sip from the cup.
“Boys and I are gonna be working on the house,” he answered.
“The boys and you?” Melissa frowned.
“Yeah. A crew’s coming up from Fallsview. Missed the last exit so they had to take 84 south off the thruway, but they should be here soon.” Crow looked pointedly at Melissa's robe.
She pulled the ends of the light cotton closer together and tightened the belt. “Was that them on the phone?”
“Yeah. I've been here for a couple of hours checking out the flooring. The rot extends farther than I thought it did. Gonna have to replace the whole damn thing. I had no idea it was this bad when I went through it. I’m really fucking sorry, Melissa.”
He looked her over then and his eyes hit the long scratches and the dark bruising that had begun on her leg.
“ I feel like shit that you got hurt. Jules told me he looked at your leg. Said that that long gash was real close to needing stitches, but that you’ll be okay. You good with that? The brother knows his shit but if you want to see a regular doctor, just say the word. I’ll take you to the walk-in clinic right now or even the emergency room if that’ll ease your mind.”
“No. I’m okay. Just scrapes, really. As long as I keep them clean, I should be fine.” Melissa couldn’t help but be touched at the obvious concern and worry she saw on his face.
“Headache?” Crow moved closer to her and smoothed the top of her hair.
“Gone. I'm still a little fuzzy from the pills, but I'm better. Thanks for sitting with me and…” Melissa paused and colored slightly. Although she had vague impressions of him sitting with her for a while, she wasn't sure how long he had been there or what had happened while he was.
Crow pulled her close and kissed the top of her head. “Go get dressed and start packing.”
“Packing?” Melissa pulled away from him.
“Yeah. Packing. The house needs some serious work. Once we stop up the cracks in the foundation and dry out the basement, I’m gonna have the brothers dig up the sludge, pour a concrete slab and dig out a few drains. I ordered an industrial sump pump that’ll be here Monday. We’re gonna replace the whole kitchen floor, and inspect all of the headers and support beams. Then we are going to pour some new footings for the porch. I got my boy Riker coming up from Crownsmount. He’s a roofer by trade. Might as well get that shit done too, while we’re at it.”
Crow grabbed the pencil and added something to the list on the legal pad that sat next to him on the counter.
“Wow. How long is this going to take?” Melissa bit her bottom lip and looked at the appointment book sitting on the desk in the living room.
�
��Couple of weeks,” Crow answered.
“Can’t I stay in the house? Maybe Jett and I can just hole up upstairs. He has camp and I have the business to run. I can’t be gone that long. Besides I really don’t have anywhere to go…” Melissa’s voice trailed off as she automatically started calculating how much money she would lose if she had to close down her business for that long. Because thanks to Toni’s love of phone tree banter, word had spread about Melissa’s hot new landlord.
While Melissa had been amused at the growing parade up her driveway of high-heeled, tightly dressed women hoping to catch Crow’s eye, she was mostly just grateful for the new business their lust-driven curiosity had generated.
“Yeah,” Crow’s voice broke through her thoughts. “I figured you wouldn't exactly be thrilled with the plan, but I have to get this shit done, Melissa. Renovations are long overdue and have now turned into serious safety issues. I can't be worrying about the place falling apart around you two. Jaci never should have had Murphy rent it out like this. And he never should have fucking done it.”
At the name Jaci, Melissa flinched.
Visions of Crow’s ex-wife flashed before her eyes. Melissa had forgotten how beautiful Jaci really was. With her long legs, pouty lips, and perfectly shaped tremendous tits, Melissa knew she was no match in the looks department for the hard-hearted woman. Melissa sighed deeply and frowned.
“She’s gone. This time for good,” Crow had seen that flinch.
It sucked that he got how insecure the thought of Jaci made her.
“Who?” Melissa feigned confusion and rubbed the spot between her brows. “I’m just thinking about all the money I’m gonna lose.”
Crow frowned back and mumbled “Yeah. Right.”
He looked like he was going to say more, but changed the subject.
“You know you can always stay in my house.” He winked at her and lightened the mood. “Got that new big bed now and I‘ve been feeling pretty damn lonely sleeping in it all by myself.”
“Crow…” Melissa stiffened and got ready to release a thousand reasons why that just would not be a good idea. The biggest reason still sat unopened in her dresser drawer upstairs. Before she moved forward with Crow or anyone for that matter, she had to put the past with Jesse to rest once and for all.
Taming Crow (Hells Saints Motorcycle Club) Page 21