Sarah pulled away from my neck long enough to tell me she was on the pill. I’d already fucked up once in my life. No matter how good in bed or gorgeous the woman was to look at, I would never find myself back in that place again.
“I don’t fuck without a condom, ever,” I explained.
She froze for a second and then quietly said, “Okay Cas.”
Awww, fuck. I didn’t mean it to come out like that. I felt like shit. Before I could set her down and walk away, she began sucking on my ear lobe and I forgot what I was thinking. When I had the condom securely on, I carried her over to the table and set her on the edge of it. Placing my hands on either side of her hips, I lined myself up to her entrance, leaned slightly forward and slowly pushed inside. Sarah let out a loud, sexy moan.
“Love being inside you,” I whispered against her lips.
Like before, Sarah’s big blue eyes sucked me in and I knew if I didn’t watch it, I would lose myself in her. I had to shut my eyes for a second to get my bearings. When I felt her fingers wrap around my biceps and her legs around my waist, I opened them back up. Releasing her hold on me, she lay back on the table. Slowly, I began moving in long, deep thrusts. After a minute or so, I dropped my eyes from her face to her perfect tits and lost momentum. I had to pause for a second. We were on the same page, but something wasn’t working for me. I felt as if I needed something more, but didn’t know how to express it. Sensing my frustration, Sarah sat up on the table and wrapped her hands around my neck. As she pulled her body flush to mine, her hard little nipples scraped across my chest and tingles of pleasure danced up my spine. I moved my hand from the table to her waist and slid the other up her back and into her hair. Grabbing a fistful of her soft, thick curls, I pulled her head back so I could see her eyes. Slowly, I began gliding in and out. She arched up to meet me with each stroke. In no time at all, I increased the pace. Faster and faster, harder and harder, I pounded in and out of her. It was raw, sweaty and real…more real than I’d ever let it get with a woman. The sound of her screaming my name completely unraveled me. With a shout of my own, I rode my orgasm all the way to the finish line. Instead of feeling sated, though, I wanted more. I wanted her to stay, so we could repeat what we’d just done. Only this time, I would take her in my shower or on my living room floor.
As I lifted myself off of her, she let out a sigh of contentment.
“You good?” I asked, smiling down at her. She returned the smile and that place inside my chest reserved only for Kalen began to give. Quickly, I pulled away from her and went to dispose of the condom. When I returned to the living room, she was getting dressed. “Are you sure I can’t talk you into staying?”
Her smile dimmed and a flicker of guilt appeared on her face. “Can I have a rain check, please?”
It was probably for the best. I was tired tonight anyway. I quickly pulled on my jeans and walked her to the door. “No worries. I am beat anyway. Have fun with your friends tonight.” I gave her a quick kiss on her forehead and watched her run down the steps and jump into her car. She waved as she drove away. Sarah was special. I knew this, but I couldn’t do a damn thing about it. After locking the door, I did a quick clean up before going to bed.
The next day, Garrett was in the office. I didn’t know much about my new boss, except he was a nice guy. That was about it. After getting the low down on our cases, he pulled out several files and spread them across his desk.
“Max McLellan is a very important client. He is also one of my best friends. Truth be told, he’s the reason I opened this business and hired the two of you. As of right now, we have enough cases to barely squeak by. I’m not paying you anywhere near what you are worth. However, this is hopefully about to change. Max is worried about his wife’s best friend. Her name is Piper O’Connell and here is all the information I have on her.”
For the next hour, the three of us pored over the file and talked strategy. Someone hurt this woman and she wasn’t talking. Garrett and Max both assumed her silence was out of fear. Max wanted us to figure it out, but we didn’t have dick to go on. Garrett knew we had our work cut out for us, but wanted us to pull out all stops for this woman. Max was paying generously for any and all information we could dig up.
“Something you both should know,” Garrett added, “I am eventually going to ask Max to be a silent partner in the business. He’s busy with wedding shit right now, but as soon as his dance card clears, I am on it. The more money we can get into the business, the better off we will be. If either of you are interested in buying in, I will be happy to go thirds. If not, no worries, just know that Max will most likely be your boss one of these days, so whatever you do, don’t piss him off. We can’t afford it.” He handed us two more files to look over, said he had shit to do and took off. Bobby and I spent the rest of the afternoon talking timelines and strategy for the three cases.
I didn’t get home until well after six that evening. After scarfing down a ham sandwich and drinking a beer, I decided to make the two block trek to Patterson’s. Taking Garrett up on his offer had been in the back of my mind all day, so had Sarah. Her smell, taste and the way she felt when I was balls deep inside her invaded my every waking moment. I needed to stay away. I had serious baggage, but who was I kidding? I couldn’t stay away if I tried. My keep it simple motto was morphing into something completely out of my control. She’ll be gone by Sunday and things will go back to normal. I felt as if my sense of normal was changing, though, and it scared the shit of me. This beautiful woman had slipped into my life and flipped it on its heels. Fuck! I raked my hands through my hair and considered whether or not to stay home tonight. It’s better if I don’t go. The second I made my decision, I heard a knock on my door.
“It’s open!” I shouted.
The door swung open and Sarah walked in. She had on a pair of ratty worn jeans, a grey thermal and black Converse. She wasn’t wearing any makeup and had her hair up in a ponytail. After last night, I didn’t think she could get any prettier. I was wrong. Xandria, without makeup, was not a pretty sight. Sarah, however, was a different story. Some women had it. Some didn’t. This woman had it in spades.
“Well, look what the cat dragged in. What’s up, buttercup?” I asked.
A look of uncertainty appeared on her pretty little face and I wanted to wipe it away. “Ummm, I just wanted to apologize again for last night. I don’t want you to think I used you, because I didn’t. I mean, I’m not like that. I swear.” A flustered Sarah was both cute and sexy. Before she could say anything else, I had her in my arms and over my shoulder.
“Really? This again?” she sarcastically clipped.
I smacked her on her ass, before dropping her on my bed. Then I stripped her bare and refused to enter her until she swore she hadn’t gone home with one of those two guys from the bar last night. She laughed in my face.
“For your information, you are the only man I have ever gone home from a bar with, boyo.”
Her confession made my gut twist. I played it off by teasing her. “Boyo?”
She opened her mouth to reply, but before she could get the words out, I shut her up with my tongue. Then I slid on a condom, plunged my dick inside her luscious body and rode her deep and hard.
After we cleaned up I ordered pizza and we ate it together naked in my bed. I had her two more times that night, once on my living room sofa and once in the shower. After the shower, we crashed hard. Sometime in the middle of the night I felt her crawl out of bed and kiss the side of my neck. Before she could get away, I pulled her in for a second, much longer kiss. I had to work late tomorrow night, but had Saturday night open. It was her last night in town and I had to see her one last time.
“Come over Saturday night.”
Her eyes searched mine and she smiled. “It will have to be after ten. Remember, my brother’s getting married.” I was relieved she didn’t ask me to the wedding. I didn’t do weddings, or brothers for that matter.
“I’ll be waiting.”
&n
bsp; She leaned down and gave me another kiss. “See you then, killer,” she whispered.
I followed her to the door and watched her safely get into her car.
I spent most of the next night on an unproductive stake out with Bobby. He asked me all kinds of questions about Sarah, but I had no answers. No, we weren’t a couple. No, I wasn’t going to pursue it any further. Yes, the sex was out of this world. In another life, I would chase her down and make her mine. Of course, I told him none of this.
Saturday morning I woke early and went to the gym. Bobby showed up halfway through my work out. He wanted to go for drinks at a new bar called Dragonfly that night, but I told him I had shit to do. I drove home, took a shower and made myself some eggs for breakfast. I had just turned on the morning news, when my cell rang.
“Cas here.”
“Cas, it’s Alexandria, don’t hang up.” Her voice sounded sober and clear for a change. I didn’t hang up, but I also didn’t engage her in conversation. “You told me when I was ready you would come and take me. Well, I’m ready,” she bluntly stated.
“Today? Look Xandria, I am happy that you are ready, but can’t this wait until Monday?”
“Well, Caswell, seeing as you are the reason I have to go to this God forsaken place to begin with and I’m required to have someone with me when I check in, I choose you. That is, unless you’ve changed your mind?”
“You and I both know I haven’t, Alexandria.”
“Then you’d better drive fast, Caswell.” Her venomous tone told me what kind of mood she was in.
I checked my watch. If I left now, I could check her in and be back by ten tonight, no problem.
“I’ll be there in three hours. If you so much as take a sip of alcohol or pop a pill before I get to you, I will haul your ass straight to the police station. I don’t give a fuck who your daddy is. I have irrefutable proof and I won’t hesitate to use it, Alexandria. Are we clear?”
“Crystal,” she hissed, and hung up on me.
Home. The house I bought for Xandria had never been home to me. Home was so much more than four walls and a roof. It was a safe place full of love and loyalty…at least it should be. In my case, it was never that.
Three months after my one night stand with Alexandria, she showed up at my place of business claiming she was pregnant with my child. At first, I refused to believe her. I used a condom all three times I fucked her. There was no way the kid was mine. Angry that I didn’t take her admission at face value, she tried to get her daddy involved. He threatened to have me fired unless I owned up to my responsibilities and married his precious little girl. Until one month before my son was born and I had the paternity test in hand, I didn’t budge on my convictions. When I found out Kalen Alexander Ashford was, without a doubt, my flesh and blood, I had to look at things differently.
Three and a half hours later, I pulled into the driveway of the house I owned yet no longer lived in. It was unsettling to have to ring the doorbell of my own home. It took a few minutes for Xandria to answer.
“Come in,” she said, holding open the door. She looked like hell. Dark circles ringed her once vibrant brown eyes and her normally perfectly styled hair hung limp and greasy to her shoulders. Drugs, alcohol and bitterness had transformed her into someone I no longer knew. “Want a drink?” she asked.
“Are you fucking kidding me?” I snapped.
“Calm down, I didn’t say I was going to have one.”
“Is your bag packed? If not, you have thirty minutes to get it done,” I told her.
“I packed it before I called you this morning.” Our house had never been a happy place, but it had been a clean one. Today it wasn’t even that. In fact, it downright stunk.
“You need to get someone in here to clean this place while you’re gone.”
“Someone’s scheduled to come tomorrow,” she said.
“Good, grab your bag and let’s go.” She stomped up the stairs and returned a minute later rolling a big suitcase.
On the way to the center, she started to panic. “Are you really going to make me do this? With your help, I can beat it, I swear.” She reached over and grabbed my hand. Without thinking, I yanked it away. If I had seen it coming, I would have stopped it before she could touch me. Her touch made me sick to my stomach.
“Please Caswell, let me apologize,” she tearfully begged.
“Will that bring him back? Will it change what happened before or after? What do you think your precious apology will do, Xan? I’ll tell you. It won’t do shit because it won’t change a thing.”
“I hate you!” she shouted through her tears. I did not give a fuck. I wanted her upset. I wanted her to suffer for the rest of her life. Lord knows I would.
It took me the entire day to check Alexandria into the rehab facility. Her father showed up two hours into the process. Like me, he was furious with her. The only difference is he loved her. I never had. Now, I hated her. She played us both. At first he asked me not to press charges. I held my ground, though. It was either this or prison for Sterling’s precious little princess. For the majority of our separation, Alexandria Ashford would be locked away in a drug and alcohol rehabilitation facility, instead of serving a life sentence behind bars for having killed our only son like she should be.
I made it back to Charlotte at the stroke of midnight. Sarah was nowhere to be found. Because of Alexandria, I would never know if Sarah showed up tonight or not. I would never see her smiling face or kiss her berry lips again.
Once upon a time I was a man with a full life with a bright future ahead of him. Now, all I knew was regret.
Chapter Five
Sarah
‡
“Are you sure you have to go back today? Just because Max and Ellie are on their honeymoon doesn’t mean you have to rush back, you know. You can stay with me.”
Ignoring Amanda, I stared out the window at the trees flashing by and tried to assess what I was feeling. Disappointed, let down…sad.
“Sarah, are you listening to me?”
Last night my brother married the woman of his dreams. The wedding was incredible. Max and Ellie were finally getting their happily ever after. Lord knows they both deserved it. The moment they left the reception for the hotel, I said my goodbyes to everyone and took off for Cas’ place.
Only, Cas wasn’t there.
One hour and fifteen minutes I sat on the stoop outside his apartment complex waiting for him to show. When both exhaustion and frost bite set in, I gave up and drove back to Max and Ellie’s house. Cas made me no promises, so why did I feel cheated? Because I wanted more. Now, after a pitiful night’s sleep, I was on the way to the airport and wasn’t sure I wanted to go back.
“It’s probably for the best he didn’t show last night.” Amanda’s harsh words cut straight to the core of it. “I mean, you know nothing about the guy,” she continued. “You don’t even know his last name.”
“I can easily find out his last name, Amanda. All I have to do is Google his address.”
“That’s not the point,” she huffed.
Amanda was right. If Cas wanted me to know his last name, he would have told me. In fact, I waited for him to do so the other night, but he didn’t. Nor did he give me his phone number…or say goodbye.
My heart lurched as we pulled up to departures. Ten days ago, I was so secure in my convictions. I was angry my brother had sent me away. I was never going to move home. I was so sure about my future. Now, I wasn’t sure about anything. Max didn’t want to send me away. He was only keeping me safe. More than once this week Max had spoken to me about what happened. Each conversation ended with him telling me how much he wanted me home. In fact, just yesterday morning both he and Ellie tag teamed me about moving back.
Before opening the car door, I told Amanda, “Max wants me to move back before the baby comes.”
An earsplitting smile appeared on her face. “Really? That’s April, right? I don’t leave for the summer until June, so that will
leave us plenty of time to tear up the town.”
“It will give me just enough time to finish my spring classes and put in a transfer.” I told her.
Her eyes lit with joy. “So, you’re going to do it?”
Am I really going to do it? I asked myself. It was amazing how much had changed in such a small amount of time. “I’m seriously considering it,” I admitted.
“Hell yes!” Amanda shouted, and pumped her fists in the air. We both laughed.
Glancing down at my watch, I sighed. “I have to go or I’ll miss my flight.”
“Okay, go. Be safe. I’ll see you in April.” Right as I opened the door, she added, “I’ll be sure and text if I see Cas at Patterson’s.”
With a tight smile, I sarcastically replied, “You do that, you cheeky cow.” Then I closed the door on her laughter and waved my middle finger her way as I entered the terminal.
The entire flight back to Scotland I thought about moving back to Charlotte. I dreaded breaking the news to the Hodsons. They had become my surrogate family. It was going to be hard to say goodbye. After exhausting the topic of moving, my mind drifted to last night. Where was Cas? Something had kept my trouble-eyed mystery man away last night. Was it his job…a family emergency…another woman? I did not have much experience with men, but what I did have was strong intuition and a firm gut. My gut told me it wasn’t another woman. Cas was into me as much as I was him. If only I’d had the chance to tell him goodbye.
By the time I landed in Scotland, I had a plan. I was going to finish the semester and then I was going home for good.
* * *
Five months later
“Thanks for coming to get me.”
Amanda eyed my cart full of suitcases. “Is this all you have?” Her voice dripped with sarcasm and I couldn’t help but laugh. Four suitcases was only a small portion of what was due to arrive next week.
“Lyndsey and Grant are shipping the rest tomorrow,” I informed her.
“How did Lyndsey take you leaving?”
“She was sad. We all were. However, she got me two months longer than originally planned.”
Keep It Simple (MMG Series Book 4) Page 6