Lukas winced. “I’m not sure if that was the best way.”
“I am. Plus, I mentioned Oscar. He’s cute enough to convince anyone to pay us a visit.”
Lukas waved a hand. “Anyway . . .”
Rebecca rolled her eyes. “Anyway, Darla promised me in front of Hannah and Mr. Carson that she’d stop by after she checks in at home.”
Remembering how chaotic things were at the Kurtz house, he said, “Don’t be too surprised if she doesn’t make it over.”
“Oh, she’ll come. Now all we have to do is see what happens next.”
“Do you think we need to worry about Levi?”
For the first time during the conversation, Rebecca looked unsure. “I don’t think so. He’s been working late this week. They won’t see each other.”
“He’ll still find out about it and he’s not gonna be too happy.”
“He ain’t going to be happy at all. But like Mary, he needs to get over what happened, Lukas.”
Lukas wondered if it would ever be that easy for Levi. Unlike everyone else in the family, Levi had been in the room where the men had died. He’d witnessed the explosion and had tried his hardest to save John. Later, after much of the warehouse had caught fire, he led the fight to try to save the others as well.
They all knew part of Levi’s anger toward John was a reflection of his own anger at himself. He felt guilty and wasn’t eager to forgive others because then he’d have to forgive himself, too.
“Lukas, you know I am right, don’t you?”
Feeling weary, he nodded. He did know Rebecca was right. Besides, he was eager for Darla to stop by, just like she used to when they were in school. At least two or three times a week she’d walk home with him and Rebecca after school and stay for an hour or two.
“It will go okay, bruder. I’ll make sure of it.”
Sometimes he wished God would have given him even an eighth of Rebecca’s self-assuredness. He would like to know what it felt like to go through his days knowing that he was right.
Lukas glanced at the clock. “I think I’ll go shower, then.”
Rebecca smiled at Amelia, who had just entered the kitchen with a fresh load of laundry in her arms. “That’s a mighty gut idea, Lukas. You don’t want to scare Darla away before she even has time to settle in.”
He would have acted annoyed about her teasing except he kind of thought she might be right. He was a stinky mess after working at the mill all day, followed by another two hours outside in the fields and in the barn.
“I’ll be back down soon.”
Handing him a stack of towels, Amelia said, “Put these away while you’re up there, would you? And take your time. Supper is just soup and sandwiches tonight.”
Grabbing the pile of towels, he went to do as his sisters bid. He not only needed to get clean, he needed to prepare himself for whatever was going to come next.
Chapter 17
By eight o’clock that night, however, Lukas was wondering why he’d gone to so much trouble.
Darla had come over as she’d promised. After shyly saying hello to him, she’d been claimed by his sisters, a sleepy Oscar, and a plate of coconut cupcakes that Amelia had somehow found the time to bake.
Lukas had sat in his father’s old easy chair in the living room and feigned interest in the latest edition of The Budget. That didn’t last long.
Now, feeling restless, he thumbed through two magazines, one on farming and one on lumber. He wasn’t surprised that neither was as interesting as the sound of Darla’s voice floating in from the kitchen.
After tossing the magazines on the side table, he gave up all pretense of doing anything but eavesdropping on the girls’ conversation. He was more than a little curious what they had to talk about that couldn’t involve him. Again and again, he strained to hear what, exactly, they were saying but he only caught Rebecca’s words and Amelia’s shy quips. Never Darla’s responses.
He didn’t want to remain apart from them another minute. Opening the door, he smiled at all of them. “I couldn’t wait any longer for dessert,” he announced.
Amelia, who’d been in midconversation, stopped abruptly. Darla blinked while Becky raised her eyebrows.
“You’re too hungry to wait, Lukas?” Rebecca asked.
“Maybe.” Feeling foolish, Lukas gestured to the cupcakes arranged on a serving plate. “These look mighty gut. I don’t remember having them before.”
“I made them last month,” Amelia said.
“Huh. Well, these look different.” Inwardly, he winced. It seemed he could no more casually enter the women’s conversation than one of them could have joined him and his buddies on a fishing trip.
After a long, awkward moment passed, Darla saved the day. “You should take one, Lukas, they’re wonderful-gut.”
“They look good.” He put two on a plate. “Real, um, coconutty.”
Rebecca groaned as she sipped her coffee.
He sensed the girls’ surprised reactions when he pulled out a chair and sat down. Lukas felt a little guilty but not enough to regret joining them. He’d wanted to spend some time with Darla as well. “Sorry, but I don’t want to sit alone in the living room any longer.”
“Obviously not,” Rebecca murmured.
As his sisters smirked at each other, Darla cleared her throat. “We were just talking about Hannah Eicher.”
“Really?” They all knew Hannah, of course. Amelia and she were close, though Lukas couldn’t recall if Amelia had been spending much time with her lately. “Is she all right? The last time I visited her and her parents she seemed to be over the worst of her grief.”
“I think she is, indeed,” Darla said. “She’s an Englisher couple’s nanny now.”
Picking up a fork, Amelia delicately speared a bite-sized section of her cupcake. “She’s been working there for a while. She told me about the baby boy she watches. She says he’s sweet.”
“I got the chance to talk to her at the post office yesterday,” Darla added as she stood up and set the sleeping pup in his dog bed by Rebecca’s chair. “After everything settled down with Mary, we chatted for a couple of minutes. She said she was unexpectedly happy.”
“I like that phrase,” Becky mused as she reached for another cupcake. “Unexpectedly happy sums up a lot.”
Darla nodded. “I’m so glad she is getting over Paul.”
Lukas was a bit surprised that the ladies were talking about anything that had to do with the accident at the lumber mill, but he supposed he shouldn’t have been. Almost every conversation he had with his friends had something to do with either the mill, the fire, or one of the men who’d passed away. “Paul was a gut man and I think they could have been happy. But they weren’t engaged, were they?”
Amelia shook her head. “They were serious, but I guess not that serious.”
“I brought Hannah up because she said something that struck me as meaningful,” Darla said shyly. “She said she was feeling more at home at the Englishers’ haus than her own. I wonder if that’s because of work or the people she’s working for.”
“Maybe it doesn’t matter,” Amelia said. “I don’t like to second-guess happiness.”
“I agree,” Rebecca said with a fond look at all of them. “We’ve already lost both our parents and several other people we care about. You never know what God has in store for our future. It’s best to be happy when we can.”
After they talked a bit longer and Lukas ate both cupcakes, Darla got to her feet. “I hate to eat and run, but I had better get home.”
At last Lukas was going to get a chance to visit with her privately. “I’ll walk you home, Darla.”
“It’s not necessary.”
“Of course it is. It’s as dark as tar out there,” Lukas said.
“I think the phrase is dark as pitch,” Amelia said with a smile.
Rebecca cocked her head to one side. “Hmm. Or one could say it’s dark as ink.”
Lukas smirked. “Or dark as s
in.”
“Oh, you all.” Darla laughed. “That’s why I’ve missed you all so much.”
“Because we make terrible similes?”
“Because you all laugh.” Looking more serious, she said, “I guess that’s really why I brought up Hannah. I think I understand why she feels so comfortable in someone else’s house. That’s how I’ve always felt about this haus.”
“We’ve missed you,” Amelia said. “I hope you know that you’re always welcome here.”
“Jah. We are glad you came over,” Rebecca added.
“Thanks for inviting me. And thanks again for what you did at the post office, Rebecca.”
“You’re my friend. I was glad I could help. Now, let’s not mention it again.”
Grabbing a flashlight from the kitchen drawer, Lukas gestured to the door. “I’ll be back after a while,” he told his sisters.
Rebecca grinned as she took a third cupcake. “Take your time, Lukas.”
DARLA COULDN’T BEGIN to count the number of times Lukas had walked her home over the years. Easily dozens. Sometimes they’d been part of a group. Sometimes it had been just the two of them. But rarely had it been so late at night.
As they walked across the fields, choosing to stay off the curvy, winding road that led from one of their houses to the other, she realized that she seemed to feel everything more strongly than before.
Before what, she wasn’t sure. Was it before she and Lukas had gotten so old?
Before the accident?
Before both of their fathers had passed away?
Before this evening?
“You scared, Darla?” he asked as his flashlight continued to cast a faint yellow glow in front of them.
“Not at all.”
“Sure? I bet there might be snakes out in the grass.”
Of course, just that moment she heard a rustling around her ankles. And she shrieked like a girl.
“Lukas, you did that on purpose.”
He chuckled. “I did not. But I should have. I haven’t heard you squeal like a baby pig in ages.”
Though she was fairly sure he was just getting her riled up, she took the bait, hook, line, and sinker. “Please tell me that you just did not compare me to a fat piglet.”
“I didn’t.” After a pause, he said, “I never said you were fat, Darla.”
“Oh!”
He laughed again. “You always were too easy to tease.”
“Probably. And I’ve always jumped right into your traps.”
“They were never traps, Darla. I’m just having fun with ya. You know I canna help myself.” His voice sounded tender in the darkness. A little deeper, his cadence a little slower. Sweeter.
She shivered.
“You cold?”
“Nee. I am fine.” She looked at him in surprise, wondering how he could have seen her reaction. Then she realized that he had the light beaming near her feet. It cast a faint glow over the majority of her body, enabling him to see her far more clearly than she could see anything.
He stepped closer. “You sure? I saw you tremble.”
“You are holding the flashlight. I can hardly see my feet.”
He waved the flashlight. “That’s why you need to stay by my side.”
She was just about to comment on that when she stepped into a hole and tripped. Immediately, his hand gripped her arm.
“Easy, now.” He drew them to a stop. “If you’re not careful, you’re gonna get hurt.”
She tested her ankle, rolling her foot this way and that. She probably wouldn’t have even done that much checking except for the fact that he looked so concerned. “I’m fine. I just stepped in a divot or something.”
“Probably a snake hole.”
“Lukas, halt!”
He chuckled as he wrapped one strong arm around her shoulders. Just like he had the other day, except this time he curved his fingers around the cusp of her shoulder, effectively holding her tight against him.
Because it was dark—or maybe because so much had happened between them that she couldn’t really help herself—she carefully slid her arm around his waist. His skin was warm underneath his blue cotton shirt. But she also noticed how different he felt. Where her waist was soft and curved, his felt more like a solid wall.
It felt nice. Slowly her hand relaxed but stayed put.
In response, Lukas squeezed her shoulder a tiny bit. Maybe just enough to let her know that he was there and approved of her arm around him.
“Hey, Darla?”
“Jah?”
“What . . . What do you think would have happened if we tried again?”
Was he talking about their friendship? That worried her. Did he still not feel that they’d made great strides? “Tried what again?” she asked hesitantly.
“That kiss.”
“That kiss?” She was just about to say that he must have gotten her confused with some other girl because they sure hadn’t kissed . . . when she remembered. “I canna believe you mentioned that,” she said around a groan.
“Why not? It’s dark. We’re walking arm in arm . . .”
“We’re walking with your arm around me.” She pulled her hand away from his waist, but to her surprise, he grabbed at it and placed it back around him.
“Don’t get so spun up. There’s nothing to be embarrassed about.”
“You know there is.”
He was talking about when she was thirteen and they’d played some awful game of truth or dare with his siblings, some of hers, and about five other kids they knew from school.
Lukas—being Lukas—had always picked dares. That one had surely been a doozy. He’d practically been forced to pull her behind a barn and give her a peck on the lips. Unfortunately, she hadn’t known how to kiss and neither had he. They’d been nervous wrecks—their noses had smacked into each other and somehow she’d managed to bite her lip in the process. Next thing she knew, she’d been scurrying back to everyone, but someone had seen blood on her lip.
And then, of course, the teasing had begun. Most everyone had assumed that he’d bitten her instead of kissed her. Lukas had taken it good-naturedly, but she’d been mortified, both by their awkward nose-knock and the blood. But also by the fact that everyone in their circle of friends knew that she’d been kissing Lukas Kinsinger . . . and that her wonderful, most-anticipated moment had been such a terrible, terrible disappointment.
“Darla, it wasn’t anything to be embarrassed about. After all, you were only twelve,” he said patiently as he pulled them forward, their ankles brushing against the dark, cool grass.
“I was thirteen.” She remembered, because her parents would have never let her join those kids if she hadn’t been a real teenager.
“We were young. I didn’t know how to kiss.”
“Obviously.”
“For the record, I never actually bit you. Just saying.”
“I never said you did. Just, um, everyone thought you did.”
He chuckled. “Guys called me all sorts of names after that. Ferret-mouth was the worst.”
She giggled. “Ferret-mouth? That’s terrible.”
“Simon had heard ferrets had terrible teeth.”
Simon had always been Lukas’s best friend. Even then. And even then, he’d had quite the reputation. “I bet Simon knew how to kiss back then.”
“Probably,” he said good-naturedly. “Though . . . I assure you that I’m much better now.”
Because they were now walking so slowly and he was holding her so securely against his side, she closed her eyes, trying not to think about why he would be better. “I guess that means you’ve had a lot of practice?”
“Well, some.”
“Huh.”
“What? You’re actually going to try to tell me you haven’t kissed anyone since you were twelve?”
“I was thirteen, Lukas.”
“Whatever.”
“Not really.”
“Come on, twelve, thirteen . . .” He drew to a stop. �
��Wait a sec. Are you telling me that that was your only kiss?”
“Maybe.” She yanked away from his arm, and looked down at her feet.
The flashlight hung limply from his hand, illuminating her black tennis shoes and his heavy work boots.
Then, to her surprise, he bent down and set it gently on the grass.
And pulled her into his arms.
“What are you doing?” Oh, but she hated that her voice was suddenly as high-pitched as it had been back when she was thirteen.
Thank the Lord, Lukas couldn’t see her face.
Instead, he gripped her arm with one hand, curved a hand around her cheek and jaw with the other, bent his head, and brushed his lips against hers.
After the briefest of pauses, she reached out and gripped his arms. Kissed him back. And then kissed him again. There, in the dark, in the field in between their two farms.
She was old enough to know better, old enough to fear consequences of their actions. Yet young enough not to care.
Lukas’s kiss was sweet and perfect and everything she’d once hoped it would be.
And then, all too soon, it was over.
After pulling away, he bent down and retrieved his flashlight. “I had better get you home,” he said after a pause.
“Jah.”
“You want to marry me yet?”
“After one kiss in a field? Nee.”
He sighed. “At least I didn’t bite you.”
“At least there’s that, ferret-mouth.”
When he reached out and took hold of her hand, she clasped it. And couldn’t help but think that Lukas Kinsinger had been right yet again.
He had learned an awful lot in the past fifteen years.
Chapter 18
April 12
Hannah, are ya leaving for work already?” her mother called from down the hall.
After carefully spreading mayonnaise on her bread, Hannah added two slices of smoked turkey, a slice of Swiss, and a piece of crisp lettuce on top, then neatly sliced it. “Jah, Mamm. You know how Mr. and Mrs. Ross don’t like me to be late.”
“Well, I know how you like to get over there early,” her mother reproved as she appeared. “I haven’t had the pleasure of meeting your Englisher bosses yet.”
A Son's Vow Page 15