by Abby Green
‘Did you miss having a father?’
The question surprised Ashling. She wouldn’t have expected Zach to want to pursue a personal conversation.
The sky was darkening to violet outside, heightening the sense of being in a luxurious cocoon and Ashling hesitated, thinking of all the moments when she’d seen other kids interact with their fathers and had felt that sharp pang of envy. It was one of the reasons she’d bonded so quickly with Cassie—because while Cassie’s father was alive, she’d lost her mother at a young age, so they’d shared the loss of a parent on either side.
Ashling’s mother had become a sort of surrogate mother to Cassie. As for Cassie’s father, though, he hadn’t approved of Ashling and Cassie’s friendship, never missing an opportunity to remind Ashling of her rightful place.
‘I can’t say I didn’t, because of course I did, but I wouldn’t swap the upbringing I had for the world. My mother made sure I felt loved and secure in a way that most kids with two parents don’t get.’ She made a small face, unable to stop herself from admitting, ‘That’s to say that while I don’t regret anything, if I had a choice I’d probably choose a more...settled life for my own family. I was always a little envious of Cassie that she had a home that didn’t change and move every few years.’
‘So you want a family some day?’
Ashling blanched. She’d already said too much. No way was she divulging her deeply secret daydreams of a gaggle of children who would be siblings to each other, because she’d always felt that lack in her own life.
She felt Zach glance at her and kept her answer vague? ‘Well, I guess so—doesn’t everyone? Don’t you?’ she tacked on hurriedly, hoping to deflect his attention from her.
She looked at him. If she hadn’t, she might have missed the clenching of his jaw before it relaxed again.
He said, ‘I expect I’ll have a family one day.’
With the kind of woman Ashling had seen him with four years ago. Patrician. Beautiful. With the right bloodline.
Curious, she said, ‘You don’t sound too enthusiastic about it.’
He made a little shrugging movement. ‘Family is about legacy and continuity.’
The faintly hollow tone in his voice made her wonder what his family was like. She imagined similarly stern parents. Nannies doing the grunt work of parenting. Boarding school? Ashling felt a pang, thinking of a young, dark-haired boy being left at the gates of a Gothic mansion. Then she cursed herself for letting her imagination run away with itself.
She said, ‘For someone like you, I can see that legacy and continuity would be important. After all, what would I have to pass on to the next generation?’
Zach slid her a glance. ‘A talent for amateur dramatics and causing trouble?’
CHAPTER FIVE
THEY WERE WALKING into the restaurant and Zach should have had his mind on the dinner ahead—it was a good sign that Georgios Stephanides wanted to get to know him better—but he was still thinking about the fact that he’d unwittingly brought up the subject of family with Ashling, when it was something he preferred to avoid thinking about at all costs.
The very notion of family was toxic to him. And yet he’d made a promise to his mother that he would not let the Temple name die out. That he would do her sacrifices justice by creating his own legacy. By having a family.
And, worse than that, he was distracted by Ashling’s reaction to his last flippant comment about amateur dramatics. He didn’t like the way it had affected his conscience.
She’d looked at him with an expression of hurt and something else on her face before she’d quickly hidden it. It reminded him uncomfortably of how she’d looked at him that night four years ago, when he’d told her he wouldn’t touch a woman like her. She’d looked stricken.
Then she’d said quietly, ‘I’ve told you I’m sorry for what happened that night. I’ve never done anything like that since then. I knew it was wrong. I couldn’t even keep the money they paid me. I’m really not some...opportunistic con artist, but I don’t know how to convince you of that if you won’t give me a chance.’
The maître d’ was approaching them now, an unctuous smile on his face, and Zach took Ashling’s arm. She felt very slight next to him. Delicate.
He said, ‘Look at me, Ashling.’
He saw the way her jaw tensed, but finally she looked up, blue eyes huge. Her mouth was set. He wanted to see it soften. Wanted to feel it under his again, yielding...
‘I’ll give you a chance, okay?’
Something flared in her eyes. Her cheeks pinkened. It had a direct effect on his blood, heating it at the most inappropriate moment. He gritted his jaw.
Her mouth softened. ‘Thank you, I appreciate it.’
The maître d’ reached them and Zach turned his attention to the man—anything to erase that image of Ashling’s soft mouth from his brain before he had to sit down and be civilised.
* * *
‘So you don’t work for Zach full time, then, no?’
Ashling shook her head at the very glamorous wife of Georgios Stephanides. Elena had short silver hair and beautiful features, and she was as genial as her husband.
‘No. My best friend Cassie is Mr...er... Zach’s executive assistant. She’s in the States for a couple of weeks, and Cassie’s own assistant is out sick, so Zach needed help at the last minute.’
Or, more accurately, needed vengeance.
The older woman’s dark eyes were as shrewd as her husband’s. She looked from Ashling to Zach, who was deep in conversation with her husband, and then she said, ‘So tell me, dear, what do you normally do?’
Ashling smiled, glad of the change of subject away from Zach and her role. ‘I’m a yoga teacher, mainly, but I dabble in a few other things as well.’
The woman’s face lit up. ‘Yoga saved my life after I had a back operation. Now, tell me which kind you practice...’
* * *
‘They’re a lovely couple.’
Zach looked at Ashling. Her skin was lustrous in the dim light of the car. ‘That’s one way of putting it. You do realise that Stephanides is one of the most powerful men in Europe, if not the world?’
Ashling shrugged. ‘I don’t care about any of that. He’s down to earth. Nice. They both are.’
Zach made a sound. He’d seen Georgios Stephanides’s less genial side. But he had to admit that Ashling was right. Georgios was no push-over, but he was a rare thing: a humble billionaire.
‘So what’s the deal you’re working on? Or is it too top secret to divulge?’
Every instinct within Zach screamed at him not to say a word. After all, that was how he’d achieved the success he had. By trusting no one. It was lesson he’d learnt at an early age, when he’d tried to make friends at a new school. A boarding school in the middle of nowhere. He’d been twelve years old.
They hadn’t been interested in making friends though. Only giving him a lesson in knowing his place. They’d given him a bloody nose and then sneered at him. ‘Listen up, Temple. You are not one of us and you never will be, so let’s not pretend otherwise, hmm? You’re only here because you’re a box-ticking exercise in showing charity to the underprivileged. No matter where you end up, you’ll never be one of us.’
One of the boys had punctuated that speech by spitting on him where he’d lain on the ground. That had been Zach’s first lesson in learning control. Stopping himself from going after them and punching and kicking until the humiliation went away.
And then—many years later—this very woman beside him, in a cheap red wig and a tarty dress, had given him a refresher lesson in not letting his guard drop. Ever.
Now she cut into the slew of unwelcome memories, saying quickly, ‘Actually, of course you can’t say anything.’
But, perversely, in spite of the memories and his better instincts, Zach felt a strong compulsion
to speak. Before he could overthink it, he was saying, ‘Georgios and his wife never had children. So he’s looking for someone who can take the reins of his bank. He wants to retire and move into philanthropy.’
Ashling looked at him, compassion all over her face. ‘Oh, no, that’s awful. Elena never mentioned anything...they would have made great parents too.’
Zach had never considered that, because his own view of family was so ambivalent. It was slightly jarring to think of his business acquaintance as someone who might have felt the lack of a family.
And he noted uncomfortably that Ashling’s first reaction hadn’t been to comment on the fact that he’d just revealed he was in line to take over one of the world’s oldest and most respected financial institutions.
Feeling a little bemused, Zach said, ‘Elena seemed to like you.’
‘Not everyone has the worst impression of me. She’s interested in yoga—we talked about that.’
He had to admit—reluctantly—that Ashling had been a good foil this evening. Easy company. He thought of the hurt look on her face when he’d made that comment about amateur dramatics.
Maybe he was being unfair to judge her wholly based on one incident four years ago. She was either telling the truth about it being a one-off, and she really was just a scatty friend of Cassie’s. Or she was lying through her teeth and still angling to make the most of this opportunity.
Had she really grown up on a commune with a mother who sounded like the ultimate hippy? He felt something reckless move through him. He wanted her to prove that he was wrong to give her a chance. That she wasn’t innocent of trying to seduce him in his own home.
On the spur of the moment Zach pulled in at the side of the road.
She looked at him. ‘What are you doing?’
He got out of the car and went around to open Ashling’s door.
He said, ‘Do you want to have a go?’
She looked up at him, comprehension dawning on her face. ‘You mean the car? Drive the car?’
He shrugged. ‘Sure—why not? I’m not precious about things like that.’
‘But...but I haven’t driven in a while. It’s an Aston Martin!’ she spluttered.
‘You know how to drive, don’t you?’
‘Yes, but this is the other side of the road. I mean, it’s not even a road—it’s the Champs-Élysées!’
‘It’s just a road. My apartment isn’t far from here. I’ll direct you.’
A mixture of excitement and shock warred on Ashling’s expressive face.
He half expected her to confess that she didn’t actually know how to drive, but then she scrambled out of the car, the slit in the dress showing one very taut and toned thigh.
She was breathless. ‘Okay, I’ll give it a go.’
Zach realised that what he was doing was madness. They were on one of the world’s most famous roads. If anything happened it would be splashed all over the papers. But that uncustomary reckless spirit moved through him again.
He watched Ashling walk around and get into the driver’s seat. He got into the car.
* * *
Ashling wondered if she was having an out-of-body experience. She felt the steering wheel under her hands, the leather warm from Zach’s touch. Looked at the lit-up dashboard with its iconic design. Heard the low, throaty purr of the engine.
It was automatic, so she didn’t have to worry about the gearstick, and Zach pointed out a few things. When there was a lull in the traffic, she followed Zach’s instructions to move out into the road, the car throbbing with barely leashed power underneath her. To her intense embarrassment it made her think of Zach and how he might feel if he was under her...
‘Red light,’ Zach said.
Ashling pulled to a smooth stop, breathing deep to try and calm her racing heart. Awe and excitement flooded her blood. ‘It feels amazing. So light, but powerful at the same time.’
‘I wanted an Aston Martin ever since I saw my first Bond movie as a kid.’
Ashling hit the accelerator again when the light went green. The car surged forward with the barest tap. When she felt she had it under control, she sneaked a quick glance at Zach. ‘You were a Bond fan?’
‘Still am.’
‘I loved them too,’ she admitted. ‘Even though my mother could never understand my obsession. I think it was the cars and gadgets I loved more than anything else.’
‘Not the wealth? The glamour?’
Ashling was barely aware of Zach’s question as she concentrated on not crashing the car. ‘No, I was never into those things. My favourite gadget was the rocket belt Sean Connery wore in Thunderball.’
‘Take the next left.’
Ashling was both relieved and disappointed to see the concierge step out of Zach’s building onto the quiet street as she came to a stop outside. She was still reeling from the shock of him letting her do this.
She looked at Zach, feeling shy. ‘Thank you. This was...amazing.’
‘You’re a good driver. Next time we should go somewhere you can really let her run.’
Ashling blanched a little. Next time?
As if he’d just realised what he’d said, Zach’s face shuttered. He got out of the car and came around to help her out. The concierge took care of parking the car. Ashling told herself that what Zach had just said was a slip of the tongue. He obviously didn’t mean it.
In the lift on the way up, she studiously avoided looking at him. There was tension in the air, though, something hot and restless.
When the doors opened he let her step out first. She turned around and a wave of gratitude for the experience he’d just given her made her act on impulse. She stepped forward and reached up, pressing a kiss to his jaw in almost exactly the same spot she’d kissed him that night four years ago.
His scent hit her, hurtling her back in time. She regretted it as soon as it had happened. She stepped back, her face flaming. His was unreadable. Oh, God. He’d think she was trying to seduce him again.
‘Sorry, I just... I didn’t mean to do that. I just wanted to say thanks...that was an amazing thing to do... I’m quite tired now. I’ll go to bed. Night, Zach.’
And she fled.
* * *
Zach watched Ashling disappear. Almost absently he touched his jaw, as if expecting to feel some kind of a mark. She’d barely pressed her lips there, but it burned.
Cursing himself, and the reckless urge that he’d given in to—the same urge that now made him want to follow her to her room and crush her mouth under his, punish her for appearing in his life again and for making him want her—Zach turned and went into the reception room.
It was vast and silent. He stopped on the threshold, struck by that fact. He’d never really noticed it before, but he realised now that he usually didn’t let the silence in.
For his whole life he’d been alone to a lesser or greater extent. An only child. And then, at school, once his aptitude had become apparent, he’d been put under a punishing regime by his mother to succeed at all costs. There’d been no room for friends. For frivolous pursuits.
He’d soon learnt to stay apart. Not only to focus, but also because he knew he wasn’t welcome. It had become like a second skin—the fact that he didn’t need anyone else. And if he had ever felt the lack he’d shut it out with work. Or, later, with sex.
But here, now, after Ashling’s disappearance, he could feel the void. The absence of her bright presence. She had an effervescence that drew people to her. He’d seen it in the way Georgios and his wife had reacted to her.
The fact that Ashling tapped into Zach’s sense of isolation wasn’t welcome. Was that what had prompted him to suggest another outing in the car before he’d even realised what he was saying? He was usually so careful around women, never putting himself in any position that might lead them to think he wanted more than a finite
affair.
Zach heard a noise behind him and turned around.
Ashling was standing in the doorway. Barefoot.
The introspection of moments before dissolved in her presence. He instantly felt warmer. Less isolated.
She looked hesitant. ‘I just... I just wanted to say I really hope you don’t think that when I kissed you just now it was because I was trying to do anything...because I really wasn’t. And last night too. I wasn’t trying to seduce you.’ She gave a little laugh that sounded strained. ‘I’ve had two boyfriends and neither lasted very long. I’m really not that...experienced.’
Her face went crimson. She half turned away.
Zach heard her say, almost to herself, ‘I can’t believe I just said that...’ She looked back. ‘Forget I said anything. I’ll leave you—’
‘Don’t.’
Zach knew he should resist, but in actuality he couldn’t. He needed something from her in that moment. Something he’d never needed from another woman because no other woman had impacted him the way she did. Connection.
* * *
The sharp tone of Zach’s voice stopped Ashling in her tracks. She looked at him. He dominated the vast space around him. The Eiffel Tower glittered like a bauble through the window behind him.
Ashling forced her voice to work. ‘Don’t...what?’
‘Don’t leave.’ His voice sounded rough.
Ashling’s heart hitched. Her skin prickled all over. The air was thick. Heavy with a tension she could feel coiling tight in her lower body.
Zach walked towards her, shucking off his jacket as he did so, dropping it on a chair. He stopped a few inches away, his gaze roving over her face.
He said, ‘I gave you the impression last night that I didn’t want you. But that wasn’t entirely fair. And neither was what I said four years ago—that you were the last woman I would touch. You made an impression on me. That’s why I recognised you. I never forgot your face. The truth is from the moment I saw you, I wanted you.’