At first, Karl pretended to be asleep. He rolled over on his side and closed his eyes. He wished he could fall asleep, and then, when he woke up, everything would be better. Emil’s mother wouldn’t still be sitting there, and Emil wouldn’t look like an old man—that’s what Karl tried to convince himself.
But he couldn’t keep his eyes shut for long, because even then he could still see Emil. Karl began tossing from side to side, trying to make a commotion. Sure enough, the bed squeaked. That’s good, Karl thought, and he opened his eyes to see if Emil’s mother had moved even a little bit. No, she was still sitting in the same place.
The rain made a terrible racket. The heavy drops hit the window like hail. He could hear water splashing onto the stones in the courtyard, as if it was running from a pipe.
“You know, Karl,” Emil said, without moving—as though he’d known all along that his friend wasn’t asleep—“I’m afraid to get out of bed.”
“Have you been up long?” Karl asked.
“Yes, for a long time. I called to my mother, but she didn’t answer.”
“You didn’t shout loud enough, Emil,” Karl assured him. “You were probably afraid of waking me up.”
Emil took his friend’s advice. He called out, “Mama!” When she didn’t respond, he shouted louder and louder, “Mama! Mama! Mama!”
After the last shout Karl heard his friend crying. But this time he didn’t have anything reassuring to say to Emil. It was all so strange. Emil’s mother was sitting on the little stool and hadn’t moved one bit.
Karl jumped out of bed and quickly threw on his clothes. He felt he had to do something. Taking firm steps, he walked into the room where Emil’s mother sat.
As soon as he entered, a chill ran through his body. She sat there with her head bent over. Even though he took such heavy steps that they made the bureau shake, she didn’t move.
Then Emil got up the courage to jump out of bed. Still in his underwear, he ran in and stood in front of his mother.
“Mama! Mama!”
He waited for a while, but she still just stared at the floor.
“Mama! Answer me, Mama! I’m frightened! Mama, you’re scaring me!”
All at once he started to cry and grabbed his mother’s shoulders.
Strangely enough, as soon as he started to cry, her body began to move, and she looked up from the floor. She looked at him for a moment or two, her eyes brimming with tears. It seemed as though she yearned to say something—not with her mouth, but with her eyes. Her face was full of kindness, but her mouth remained closed, and soon her gaze dropped to the floor once more.
Emil went over to the table and banged it with his fist in desperation.
“Mama, you’re frightening me! Why won’t you answer me?”
Once again his mother didn’t respond until Emil shouted at her. Then, as soon as he began to cry, she lifted her teary eyes and looked at him with her quiet, loving face.
Karl saw right away that Emil’s mother had changed overnight. He felt that now Emil was even more helpless than he was, and that he had to do something to help his friend.
Karl thought of his neighbor, Frau Gutenglass, who was always so kind to him and his mother.
“We ought to go to a neighbor,” he said, because often when his mother had gone to work that’s what he’d have to do.
“No, God forbid!” Emil cried. “Anything’s better than the neighbors!”
Emil told him how their neighbor across the hall had helped beat up his father. The man’s wife had also been there the day before, and she took away almost all of his mother’s clothes. She even held them up to her body as she looked in the mirror and said that they were just right for her.
“But we have to do something, Emil, we can’t just let things stay the way they are.”
As Emil and Karl continued to talk, Emil’s mother still sat there, motionless. Neither of the boys could take his eyes off her, hoping that they might see some change.
The rain continued to fall, though not as heavily. Now it was a thin, steady drizzle.
“Maybe we should go find your Uncle Robert,” Karl suggested.
“No, never! Uncle Robert warned us not to come to see him. They looted his store. It’s dangerous to walk down his street. They beat up anyone they find there. I’m too scared to go outside.”
Karl wanted to ask who exactly “they” were, but suddenly he remembered the three men who had dragged off his mother.
There was a clock on the wall in Emil’s house, but it had stopped. “It must be about twelve o’clock by now,” Emil said, when he saw Karl looking at the clock.
“How do you know?”
“Because I’m very hungry,” Emil answered.
Karl was, too, but he was ashamed to admit it.
Suddenly Emil went over to his friend.
“Karl, you won’t leave me alone, will you?”
“What are you thinking? Where would I go? I don’t have anyone else.”
“What about your grandmother?”
“No, she’s very old and sick. She’s in a hospital. I don’t even know where it is.”
“You know, maybe we’ll have to take my mother to a hospital,” Emil said.
Emil was still afraid that Karl would abandon him, so he tried to see if he could be sure of his friend.
“You know, Karl, if you walk out of here no one’s going to hit you. After all, you’re not a Jew.”
“Well, they kicked me, they beat up my mother,” Karl responded.
Emil was satisfied. He found some bread and gave it to Karl.
Karl didn’t want to take it at first, but then he bit off some.
Emil also broke off a piece and chewed on it half-heartedly.
Karl could tell that Emil was very frightened. He went over to Emil and took his hand.
“Emil, you’re the only friend I have.”
Emil’s eyes began to fill with tears.
“The only one,” Karl reassured him.
Once more Emil went over to his mother, but now he was less afraid than before. He didn’t shout desperately as he had earlier, but whispered into her ear.
“Mama, why won’t you say anything?”
They heard someone knock softly on the door. The boys froze. Slowly, cautiously, the door opened, and the rabbi walked in.
chapter five
The rabbi didn’t waste a minute. As soon as he saw the condition that Emil’s mother was in, he left the house. He came back quickly with two other men. One of them went right over to where she was sitting. He examined her for a while and then shook his head, looking at the rabbi sadly.
“Yes, Rabbi,” he said, “It’s most unfortunate. We’ll have to take her away at once.”
“God,” said the rabbi, making a fist. “Why are You silent in the face of these wicked men? God, how long, how long?”
He dropped into a chair and ran his fingers through his hair several times, as though he wanted to tear it out by the roots.
“We’re all losing our minds, Doctor. This is the third case like this that I’ve seen today. Merciful God, what do You want from us? Why have You turned away from us?”
Although it seemed that he spoke without any feeling, tears streamed from behind his glasses and ran down his face. But the rabbi made no attempt to wipe the tears away.
The two other men stood beside Emil’s mother, their heads bowed. Emil and Karl grasped each other by the hand. Emil squeezed Karl’s hand so hard that he almost cried out in pain.
The two men helped Emil’s mother up from her footstool. She didn’t resist at all. They helped her into her coat, because all at once she started to shiver.
As she walked between the two men, her face lit up with a smile. She took in the entire room with her warm eyes. She stopped in front of Emil, but only his lips moved.
“Mama, Mama!”
Her face glowed as she stood in front of her son. She opened her mouth as though she wanted to respond to him, but she made no sound.
Then her smile changed into a grimace of pain. All her tenderness vanished. Her body stretched upward, so that she seemed taller than she really was. Her face looked strained to the point of bursting, and then she let out a scream.
The wick that had been burning all night flickered for the last time and went out. The strong smell of molten wax filled the room.
As soon as the scream escaped from her, Emil’s mother seemed calmer. Her entire body trembled with cold; even her teeth were chattering. The two men led her out of the house.
The rabbi tried to get up from his chair but sank back into it. He remained seated for a few minutes, then got up and walked to the door with shaky steps.
But Emil broke away from Karl and ran toward the door, blocking the rabbi’s path.
“What will happen to me—to us?”
His voice sounded hoarse, almost like an adult’s. His face looked frightened and angry.
“What’s going to happen to us?” he screamed.
“I’m sorry, Emil, forgive me. I almost forgot about you,” he said, stroking the boy’s head. “A great tragedy has befallen us all. There are hundreds now, just like you, just like him,” he said, pointing to Karl. “Yes, hundreds. Little children, without any parents.”
He stroked the boy’s hair and face but avoided looking at him.
“I’m leaving now, but I’ll come back later. We’re looking for a home for children like you, a home where you can get something warm to eat and have a place to sleep.”
“For Karl, too?” Emil asked.
“Certainly, certainly, for him, too. We won’t abandon him, just as we pray that God won’t abandon us.”
And so the hours passed. Emil and Karl waited, their hearts pounding. They barely spoke to each other, but listened for the faintest noise—footsteps, perhaps, or a knock at the door. But there was still no sign of the rabbi.
Darkness had fallen, and Emil huddled close to Karl.
“Are you scared?” Emil asked.
“Yes,” he answered firmly. “Now I’m really scared.”
“It doesn’t look like the rabbi will come.”
“No, it doesn’t look like the rabbi will come,” Karl repeated.
“Maybe someone beat him up,” said Karl, thinking it over.
“Yes, maybe,” Emil answered.
“Come with me,” said Karl, taking him by the hand. “Come on, we have to run away from this place before it gets really dark.”
“But where will we go?”
Karl pulled him along forcefully.
At the door Karl remembered something.
“Put on your coat, it’s cold outside,” he ordered Emil, in the same tone that his mother would use.
Emil put on his coat.
“Maybe you have another coat for me?” Karl asked.
Emil rummaged through the closet and took out something. Karl tried it on, but it was so tight on him that it almost tore.
“Too bad, I’ll just have to go like this,” said Karl, opening the door.
Karl ran quickly down the steps, with Emil behind him. Once they were outside, they just stood there like two frightened puppies. Karl began to creep along the wall, pulling Emil after him.
“Let’s go back to my building. Frau Gutenglass wanted to take me in and give me a place to sleep and something to eat. She’s very nice, I’m sure she’ll take care of you, too.”
Karl walked toward the apartment house that he had fled only the day before. He walked up the few flights to what had been his home, but now he was afraid even to look at the door. Instead he went straight to his neighbor’s door and knocked on it hesitantly.
The door remained shut. Karl waited a while and then knocked again. He started to shout, “Frau Gutenglass! Frau Gutenglass!”
Karl knocked and then pushed the door, and it opened all by itself. He stood there, trembling.
Even though it was dark, Karl could see that no one was home. He went in and began to walk from one room to the next. He knew every corner of the place well. But now it all seemed strange and unfamiliar, because the apartment was empty.
There wasn’t a piece of furniture left except in the kitchen, where a large table still stood. He remembered it well, having sat there eating with Frau Gutenglass and her husband, who used to tell him lots of funny stories.
But now the emptiness of the rooms seemed so strange that he couldn’t believe his eyes. He went out to the hall and looked at the brass plate on the door.
“Yes, that’s right.” It said “JAKOB GUTENGLASS,” with the “G” rubbed off so that it looked as though it said “UTENGLASS.”
He felt embarrassed in front of Emil. He felt as though he had misled his friend, and now he had no idea what to do.
“You know,” he said to Emil, “It’s too bad the rabbi didn’t come back.
“Just yesterday Frau Gutenglass was living here,” Karl explained, “and she asked me to come in. I’m sure that she was still living here. See, the name’s on the door. And we lived across from them, over here. You can still see our name.”
But Karl still didn’t want to turn around and look at his own door.
As both of them began to walk slowly down the stairs, a door opened on the second floor.
“Karl!” Karl recognized one of his neighbors. Karl was glad to see him and started to say something.
“Shh … Karl. Here, take this.” The neighbor quickly handed him a package and shut the door.
It smelled like roasted meat. Without saying a word, Karl and Emil began to devour the food. They finished everything that was in the package—the bread, the potatoes, and the meat. They ate so fast that when they were finished they could barely catch their breath.
“That sure was tasty!” Emil stammered. Then they threw away the greasy piece of paper that was left.
Night had already fallen when they walked out of the building. Emil and Karl stood there and looked at each other. Karl waited for Emil to suggest something, but Emil had no idea of what to say. He was waiting for his friend to come up with something.
Suddenly they both ran back into the building. Karl forgot to grab hold of Emil’s hand, but there was no need to, because Emil ran right behind him.
When they were back inside, Karl asked, his heart pounding with fear, “Did you see those two men?”
“Yes,” Emil answered, panting.
“They were dressed just like the ones who took my mother away.”
Emil was too frightened to speak. He tried to several times, but he couldn’t.
When he calmed down, he explained to Karl that that’s just how the men looked—the ones who had beaten his father the other night and taken him away, covered with blood.
“We’ll have to sleep here, in the cellar,” Karl decided. “And we’ll have to stay there until morning.”
“In the cellar?” Emil asked, trembling.
“I know every corner of it,” Karl reassured him. “I even have a kitten who sleeps down there at night.”
But Emil didn’t budge.
“You have to stop being scared,” Karl insisted and forced Emil several steps toward the cellar.
It was pitch black in the cellar. Karl tapped his way along the wall and guided Emil along behind him. He told Emil to lie down.
Emil obeyed, but he began to cry.
“They could still find us here,” Karl whispered. “Be quiet, you can’t make any noise.”
Emil whimpered in the silence.
“Just pretend that this is an island, and we’re here all alone,” Karl said to comfort him. “And when it gets light, we’ll climb up the trees and eat nuts.”
All at once he gave Emil a poke and exclaimed happily, “We’re not alone. Did you hear that noise? That’s my kitten.
“Psst—Psst—Psst,” Karl called.
Soon the kitten found its way to Karl. Emil stroked its fur in the darkness, and he felt a little more at ease.
“It must be nice to be a kitten,” Emil said, thinking out loud, his eyes s
hut.
“Shh. Don’t talk, go to sleep. Good night, Emil!” Karl yawned, exhausted.
chapter six
A bit of light shone through a small window that was covered with an iron grating. The windowpane was so black that the light making its way through it looked grimy.
Emil was the first to open his eyes. He’d slept poorly all night, tossing from side to side. Several times he’d heard Karl cry out in his sleep, which terrified Emil. But now Karl was sleeping peacefully. He lay on his back, and in the dim light it seemed to Emil that his friend was smiling in his sleep.
It wasn’t long before Karl woke up, too. He opened his eyes and looked at Emil as though he didn’t recognize him. But as soon as Karl looked up at the little window, he realized where he was.
“I had such a nice dream,” he told Emil. “Your mother and my mother were taking us to the park. We were all dressed up. We played on the seesaw, we rode on the carousel, and my father was sitting on a bench, reading a book. We ran into our teacher in the garden, and she wagged her finger at me, but then she smiled. Then, all of a sudden you and I started to run, and both of our mothers ran after us, and they were laughing. Everything was so nice, the birds were singing, the carousel was playing music.”
“It must have been a nice dream. You were smiling in your sleep. But during the night you cried out, and I got scared.”
Emil propped himself up on one side. It was a hard place to sleep.
Overhead they heard a scraping noise, going back and forth. They realized that someone was sweeping with a broom.
“The janitor is sweeping the steps,” said Karl. “It must still be early, it must be when we usually leave for school.”
Both boys lay there, not wanting to get up. Suddenly the door opened, and a short man walked over to a corner, put away a broom, and picked up two others, laying them across his shoulders as if he were carrying rifles.
Karl let out a cough, and the janitor turned around, startled. “Who’s there?” He shouted, standing still.
When Karl didn’t answer, the janitor came nearer, looked closely, then clapped his hands together. “Karl! Karl! What are you doing here?”
He didn’t wait for an answer, but began to shout, “Berta! Berta!”
Emil and Karl Page 3