He was so special, she was so happy to be with him, and if they were going to continue as they had been without any possibility of a future together, at least she would have had the joy of knowing him.
Yet as he sat there dejectedly, having just turned Harry’s euphoria into grief, she couldn’t sit and watch and do nothing. Going across to him, she placed her arm around his shoulders and said softly, ‘Don’t feel bad, Leo. You had to tell him before he heard it on the village grapevine. Until now Keith and Jenna haven’t known where he was to tell him about Barbara’s passing. Better that it came from you.’
He nodded then, getting slowly to his feet, said, ‘You were wonderful out there, but what a shame it had to be you who found her. Though I suppose it was a blessing in one way. Keith and Jenna were spared the sharp, agonising shock that is part of a sudden death by having you and I around.
‘We work well together, don’t we? And today I was hoping we might have played together at the picnic, but the fates had other ideas. Playful was the last thing I felt after what happened to Barbara.’
‘So why don’t we go for a walk where it is calm and peaceful and we can unwind? Then find a nice restaurant for dinner, my treat,’ she suggested. ‘There is nothing more we can do here.’
CHAPTER SEVEN
TO AVOID going anywhere near the headland and the Balfours’ house, which was now in mourning, Amelie and Leo walked inland between hedgerows weighed down with flowers, and past Wheatlands, the biggest farm in the area, owned by the well-respected Enderby family.
While Amelie was observing its opulence, he said, ‘Some spread, isn’t it? Would you like to live in a place like that?’
She considered for a moment and then said, ‘No. I don’t think so. I’m not keen on large houses.’
‘You mean like your family’s chateau?’
She smiled across at him. ‘You have it in one. My parents took it for granted that I wanted to be married in the chateau when I was engaged to Antoine. In fact, that’s where the wedding was to be held.’
‘But you didn’t want to?’
‘No. And now I will never be married in that place. If I ever got close to marriage again, which I seriously doubt I will, I would choose to have my wedding somewhere small and beautiful.’
‘Like you,’ he said in a low voice, and she turned away.
‘Don’t make fun of me,’ she told him. ‘You’re the one with the looks.’
‘And do you think I care about that?’ he exclaimed. ‘I’d rather be downright ugly than the village catch.’
She was laughing now and he thought how easy she was to be with. How uncomplicated her attitude to life was, or had been until he’d begun to cause confusion in her mind.
She was happy to be with him if he would let her, like now, but knew that could change if his conscience began to pull at the strings of his integrity again.
‘So where are we going to eat?’ he asked as a restaurant with a thatched roof appeared on the skyline. ‘The place ahead is very popular. It is where Lucas proposed to Jenna over a clotted-cream tea on a cold day when the place was empty, or so she thought. Her family and friends were hiding in one of the other rooms ready to congratulate them when she’d said yes.’
‘How lovely, but supposing she’d said no?’
‘I take it you’ve seen Lucas Devereux?’
‘Well, yes, of course.’
‘There you have your answer, then, and in case you’re thinking that it wasn’t very romantic, being proposed to while eating a scone covered with jam and cream, surely we both agree that it is the people involved that matter rather than the location.’
‘Quite,’ she agreed demurely, ‘as long as it isn’t in the fish sheds down by the harbour, or on top of the refuse collection pile.’
If she’d been less confused about his feelings, she might have rounded off the comment with so do please bear that in mind, but there was nothing in his manner to indicate that he’d changed his mind about what he’d said when he’d spelt out for her that they weren’t going anywhere together on a permanent basis.
The restaurant wasn’t as near as it had looked. When they were almost halfway there Leo said, ‘I know a short cut. No use when in a car but much quicker when on foot. It is through remote woodland for part of the way but will certainly get us there more quickly. Do you want to try it?’
‘Yes,’ she agreed. ‘I don’t know about you but I’m hungry.’ And not just for food, she would have liked to have told him.
The woods felt cool after being in the evening sun and everywhere was very still. After a while Leo said, ‘Shall we rest for a few moments, if you can get your hunger pangs to subside?’
‘Yes. I think I can,’ she replied. ‘Appetite will have to take second place to feet. We passed a stream only moments ago. I’m going to cool them off in it. Are you coming?’
‘No, I’m fine here. Don’t be too long or the place we’re heading for will be full.’
She was already removing the sandals she was wearing and walking carefully towards the edge of a narrow rivulet running through the woods.
While she was gone he took a large clean handkerchief out of his pocket and when she came back and lay down on the grass beside him he began to dry her feet with gentle strokes.
She ached for him, Amelie thought as he bent to his task, but of his own free will Leo had taken desire out of their relationship because of something she still didn’t fully understand, so maybe it was up to her to bring it back.
He looked up and found her bright blue gaze on him. ‘What?’ he questioned. ‘What are you thinking?’
‘I’m thinking that not so long ago I accused you of having never kissed me or made love to me, didn’t I?’
His voice was flat. ‘Yes, you did indeed.’
‘So you dealt with one of the omissions that day in the lay-by, but so far haven’t done anything about the other.’
‘And you would like me to do so, is that it?’
‘Only if you want to, but I must warn you I am no expert. It will be a first time.’
Was she serious? he thought raggedly. Amelie had no idea of the workings of his mind when it came to his personal life or she wouldn’t have created this sort of situation.
It was another opportunity to tell her about Delphine, but to her it might come over as just another rejection, an escape route back to his life before she’d come on the scene.
The eyes looking up into his were wide and questioning. ‘You don’t want me, do you?’ she cried, humiliated beyond reason. ‘Why does my mouth always have to be ahead of my mind when I’m with you?’
He had no answer to that. Instead he said in the same flat tone, ‘I think we should be on our way if you are as hungry as you said.’
‘I’ve just lost my appetite,’ she told him. ‘Food would choke me.’
‘You might change your mind when we get there,’ he said placatingly. ‘So up you get and off we go in search of it. Just one thing before we go, Amelie. You have just put yourself amongst almost every woman I meet. They all want me to bed them.’
‘And do you?’
‘You mean am I the local stud? I can’t believe you’re asking me that. I thought you were different, but it seems I was wrong.’
She was up and running, wanting to get as far away from him as possible so that he wouldn’t realise just how much he’d humiliated her. But he was moving fast behind her and when he caught up said, ‘Watch out for tree roots, Amelie,’ as if they’d never had that dreadful conversation.
For the rest of the evening they were so polite to each other it was nauseating. But all the time the thought was rocketing around her mind that once again she had been the unwanted. And, she thought shamefully, she’d even mentioned her virginity like some sort of special offer.
She couldn’t wait to get away from him so that her shame might be a more private thing. The moment they’d finished eating she went to pay for the meal, in keeping with her promise when she’d s
uggested they go for a walk and she could tell from his expression that he wasn’t pleased about that either.
‘I’ve asked them to order us a taxi,’ he said when she returned to the table. ‘I didn’t think you would want to walk back the way we came.’
‘How right you are,’ she said quietly. ‘I never ever want to set foot in those woods again.’
‘I meant no hurt by what I said,’ he told her. ‘You are young, vulnerable and enchanting. Can we just leave it at that and be friends?’
‘If you say so,’ she said bleakly, not to be comforted or given back her self-respect. At that moment they were told that their taxi was outside and she hurried towards the means of escape from her folly.
When it pulled up outside the house she didn’t give Leo the chance to make any further comments, she had its door open and was running up the drive with door key at the ready once again. By the time he’d paid the driver she had disappeared from sight and he thought grimly the chances of her opening the door again if he rang the bell were slim.
So he made his way to his apartment and spent the next hour going over the awful events of the day that had started with discovering that Barbara Balfour was no longer with them, and ended with his refusal to do something he’d been aching to do for weeks—make love to Amelie.
The incident had been catastrophic in many ways. She’d taken him by surprise, for one thing, and another reason of a more irksome kind had been that it had been she who had done the asking.
It was clear that she hadn’t been remembering his words of wisdom with regard to cooling their relationship at that moment. So where on earth did they go from here? Was he still so tied to the heartache of the past that he couldn’t make love to Amelie when the opportunity was there?
He’d felt as if she was expecting him to jump at the chance when she’d made the request and had seen red. Of course he’d wanted to, but not under those circumstances.
When the phone rang he was praying that it might be her, but it was Jenna on the line with details of her mother’s funeral and also with the news that Ethan was coming over from France for it on his own as both Ben and Kirstie were now at school there and after the upheaval of the move he and Francine didn’t want to have to disrupt their education again.
‘How is your father taking it?’ he asked. and was surprised by her reply.
‘Very well, considering. He has amazed us all by saying that now Mum has gone he’s going to sell the house and travel the world, something he has always wanted to do but never got the chance. So what do you think of that?’
‘Good luck to him. Do you think he will have any trouble selling Four Winds?’
‘He might. The market is unpredictable at the moment.’
‘If he goes ahead with his plans, I can find him a buyer.’
‘Really! Who?’
‘Me.’
‘He would be happy about that, Leo. You and Amelie were so kind to him when Mum died, and he has always liked you. If he does keep to what he is saying you will be the first to know, and now I must go as Lily is fretful tonight, almost as if she knows that her grandma isn’t here any more.’
As he rang off he couldn’t believe that he’d just said he would like to buy her parents’ house if it came up for sale, and more unbelievable still that he’d had Amelie’s love of Bluebell Cove in mind when he’d said it.
The apartment was good enough for him on his own, but it was not the sort of place he would want to bring his bride to if the church bells ever pealed out over the village for him. Acquiring the house might be easy enough, but as for the rest of it he was losing his sense of direction.
In the house across the way Amelie was weeping tears of humiliation and regret. She’d known it had been a big mistake to say what she had to Leo the moment the words had come out of her mouth.
While he’d been drying her feet, desire had risen in her in a hot tide. She’d craved his touch like a thirsty person for water, with disastrous results, and as if asking him to make love to her hadn’t been awful enough, she’d told him about the icing on the cake!
The right thing to do would be to go back to France, she kept telling herself, but she was committed to working at the practice for six months and didn’t want to break her contract. There was some time to go before it would be up, so all she could do was to continue avoiding Leo as much as possible.
It was the picnic and what had happened to Barbara Balfour that had thrown them so much into each other’s company again, and those moments in the tranquil woodland setting had tempted her to say what was in her heart, but the vast waters of the sea would freeze over before she ever did that again.
She was halfway up the stairs on her way to bed when she caught sight of Leo through the landing window, striding across from the apartment, and quickly shrank back out of sight.
The day was almost over. It had been a ghastly one, and much as the sight of him always warmed her heart, enough was enough. She was too spent for any further conversation between them and what he could possibly want of her after the way they’d separated when the taxi had dropped them off she really didn’t know.
Yet one thing she could be sure of—he wasn’t coming across because he was having second thoughts about his refusal to do what she’d asked.
She was right on that count. Leo was coming to tell her about Jenna’s phone call. To inform her that Barbara’s funeral was to take place on the coming Friday and that if they could both be spared from the practice, he felt they owed it to Keith to be there, having been with him when he’d discovered that his wife had died.
But there was no answer when he rang the bell and when he looked up, the curtains had been drawn in the master bedroom. So the excuse he’d been going to use to see Amelie for just one more time before the day was done was not going to work. With measured steps he returned to his apartment.
She had heard him ring the bell from up above and was lying with her head beneath the pillows to shut out its noise. When it stopped she pulled the covers up around her and, too exhausted to even think any more, turned on her side and slept.
She awoke to a room full of sunlight and the sound of the church bells pealing not far away, and thought thankfully that it was Sunday. She had twenty-four hours to gather her wits before she and Leo came face to face again.
It was not to be the case. He came as she was finishing a mundane breakfast of cereal, toast and tea. This time she had to let him in. He’d seen her seated at the dining table as he’d walked up the drive and his first words when she opened the door to him were, ‘Are you all right after yesterday?’
‘Yes, I suppose so,’ she told him, and before he had the chance to say anything else she added, ‘Have you heard when the funeral is?’
‘Yes, Jenna phoned late last night. I came across to tell you but there was no answer so I presumed you had gone to bed. It is on Friday at half past two for a private family service at the crematorium, followed by a public thanksgiving service in the church for Barbara’s life and her dedication to those she served so well in a medical capacity. I spoke to Harry a few moments ago and he said the church service is to be relayed to anyone who can’t get inside, indicating that a large attendance is expected.
‘They’re talking of changing the name of the surgery to the Balfour Medical Centre, which I feel would be very fitting, don’t you? Especially as with Harry in charge there is still a Balfour involved.’
‘Er, yes,’ she agreed, taking in the image of him, drawn looking around the eyes but dressed in a smart top and jeans as if the events of the previous day had never taken place, while she was huddled at the table in an old T-shirt and shorts. But maybe that was because she cared and he didn’t.
Yet she knew that wasn’t true. He did care, but not in the way that she cared for him. She adored him. The more she saw of him the more she wanted to be near him, but yesterday had shown that they weren’t going anywhere together.
He had a surprise for her and it brought her out
of the doldrums into amazement. ‘The family want you to read the lesson at the service in the church, if you will.’
‘I don’t know!’ she gasped. ‘I am a stranger here. What will those who have known Dr Balfour all their lives think of that? And though I speak English fluently, I do not always get it right.’
‘You will,’ he said confidently, ‘and I won’t be far away.’
As if, she thought. He might be near in body, but in mind and purpose he might as well be sitting on the moon instead of in a nearby pew. Yet she couldn’t refuse, not about something like that, so she told him weakly. ‘Tell them yes, I will do as they ask. But I hope that it will not offend.’
‘It won’t,’ he assured her. ‘Everyone knows that you found her and tried to save her, and now I must go. An acquaintance of mine, Georgina, who owns the boutique next to the post office, was taken ill with some kind of gastritis during the night and phoned to ask me to go round, and as she lives alone I stayed with her.’
‘I see.’
‘Yes, I’m sure you do,’ he said dryly. ‘The farmer who delivers the milk around here gave me a wink when he saw me coming out of there at six o’clock this morning. I’m going home to get some sleep now, Amelie, and am presuming that you are going to spend the day on the beach, helping Ronnie.’
‘Yes, that is my intention when I have gathered my wits together,’ she said stiffly, and with a sudden surge of jealousy said, ‘Does your friend at the boutique not know that you are off duty at the weekend, that she should have called an emergency doctor?’
‘I would expect she does,’ he said, ‘but what are friends for, Amelie?’
He was already moving towards the door and as if he hadn’t made her miserable enough the day before, he departed with a wave of the hand and the casual observation that he would see her around, no doubt.
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